Chapter 20: Chapter 5: Emotions Exist

Chapter 5: Emotions Exist

The idea of graves was the result of a long-old tradition dating back to humanity's times on earth. I didn’t know the whole history of the topic but they weren’t used much on Metous. 

Instead, there were large memorial stones and buried nearby were the microscopic remains of anyone who passed. These stones were made out of the toughest material, so they wouldn’t degrade because of the weather or be damaged from attacks. The stones existed in all major cities and many would flock around to pay respects.

This ‘tradition’ began with the first settlers but it was only done initially to save future space.

Rarely some families would create a grave on their property–inspired by video and culture from other planets–to remember the deceased. Sometimes the actual body was buried there but not usually.

But I’m glad mum decided to partake in this foreign idea…

Our house wasn’t super big, standard one above-ground building and two stories below, and a small backyard just big enough to play games.

The new addition since I’d been here last was a small shed, within it a grave and a memorial photo. One me and my siblings forced him to take after ‘beating’ him in a race when Mella turned three. 

“Ella..?” Mella entered the shed, welcomed by my sorry arse sitting down blankly staring at the photo. To say the news had been a real damper on my mood would be a massive understatement.

I couldn’t do anything about these feelings either. He’d simply died due to a combination of an injury he received in his younger years resurfacing and a bad cold.

“...ah. Afternoon lil’sis.”

Mella walked to my back and hugged me. Her head resting on my shoulder, “Love ya.”

I’ve spent the better part of two days sitting here now. Partly because my emotions were a mess, and partly because I forgot people normally operated on 23-27h cycles. My family watched me and were extremely worried about my health, I don’t blame them, the eldest daughter was finally back after five years–the year after dad died… 

“Love you too.”

Mella snuggled closer, “You going to come back inside soon then?”

“Yeah, soon…” I had too many things to do, I couldn’t keep mopping around. “I’ll be fixed when the sunrises.” I promised Mella, and more importantly myself.

“You better!” She hissed, “Or I’m going slap ya!” 

“With what, those frail hands?” I rolled my hollow eyes at her pale hands on my chest. 

“Well they won’t be weak for long, I’m turning sixteen soon.” 68th of Blupple, Mella's birthday, two days from now… I don’t have a gift…

“You still need to put the effort in,” I laughed. “You going to have a party?”

“Already did, two weeks ago… A couple of friends were going on holiday so I wanted to hang out before they left.”

“Smart, you learn from the best.” I smugly replied.

“Quiet idiot. Your self-designed parties were always a bore.”

“...How could you say something so heartless.” 

“Easily as I breathe, hehe!” I could feel her laugh as she kept up her hug assault. “...Tyell and I don’t want to lose you again, ok? Please don’t leave.” Mella begged.

“I’m not going to die anytime soon.” I replied. Not wanting to say anything definite.

Silent for a moment, Mella spoke “If you don’t eat dinner, I’ll leave it in the fridge.”

“Thanks, Melly.”

Mella stayed with me for twenty more minutes before going back inside to cook. Tyell and mum would be home from work soon. Mum changed jobs after dad passed and now works at a local flower store, I hadn’t asked why but I could only assume it was for a new change of pace. While Tyell worked at a club serving drinks, no idea how he managed to land himself that gig. 

With my welcome distraction gone, I pondered.

I faced physically worst, and lamenting about this didn’t do me any good. But it still hurt.

Come on. No more sorrow Ceella. 

“Take those bad thoughts and incinerate them into the ground. No one will stop me, not even myself.” I chanted, something to help me focus.

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I walked out of the shed, leaving the door open and preceded to lay on the grass looking up at the darkening sky. I stayed like this, waiting for the day to pass. At least the stars were plenty visible on Metous. Not having glass in the way also improved the experience.

A little later I looked at my Hidden Soul Page. A byproduct of the “gift” I could display as hidden, semi-hidden or unhidden. It wasn’t that important but it did two important things; first, if I did run across someone with rare Soul Page seeing skill that wouldn’t see the dangerous parts; second, I didn’t have to stare at the constant looming threat.

However, if I used certain skills my Soul Page would automatically change… So it wasn’t that good.

Name: Ceella Stella | Race: [Human] 
Level 297 | Awakened
Mana: 100% Starlight: 100%
Vocation: [Stargazer]
Skills:
- [Blazing Solar (V | IV)]
- [Starlight (V)]
- [Gazing Upon The Stars]
- [Disruptive Starlight]
- [Star Mapping]
- [Sleepless Nights]
- [Fortified Stomach]
- [Quiet Step]

Starlight is finally back at a hundred. Phew.

Was it rare to have a second source of energy? Yes but I’m glad I did, save by butt on too many occasions. More fuel for skills and magic was always a boon. Did wish I developed some sort of physical strengthening skill early on in my escapades of surviving–would’ve made running easier.

But of course, I choose a difficult one to collect… Before landing on Espoiramissa, I didn’t know Starlight was its own energy or that even Stargazer was a Vocation–didn’t look through the thousands of options. I knew Sun energy existed–a type of energy that shared some of its building blocks with Fire and Light and was named after the natural collection point it resides in–so it was weird to find out there was an extra energy somehow separate from Sun or Light. 

[Starlight] was what allowed me to collect, store and use Starlight. 

Star gazing first became my hobby during childhood. I always a had fascination towards them and made soooo many stupid wishes upon them. But it wasn’t until a random daughter and dad bonding day–he liked to those with each of us kids whenever just to spend more time together–where we went for a midnight hour picnic.

Noticing my enthusiasm, we went out the very next week–much to mum dismay, it was in the middle of the school week…–where he surprised me with a telescope. Which I named Scopey.

It broke the year after. 

Well, that’s what happens you swing it around chasing after a shooting star.

Dad scolded me for being irresponsible… then bought me a new one. A high-end one that was still in the house. He made sure to get the toughest type on the planet.

I didn’t need to use a telescope anymore. [Gazing Upon The Stars] allowed me to see far into specifically the open sky without clutter or distractions, allowing me to focus on bright objects. But I might use it one more time tomorrow.

…I miss him…

 

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Inside the Stella family house. It was 12 pm, two hours before the midnight hour started. 

Tella had long gone to sleep, while Mella and Tyell were watching reruns of the morning news which they missed and eating chips on the couch.

“The mining organisation LSP recently had damning documents leak into public view.”

Chewing on food, Mella asked, “T-umm-h-ink it’s the Hood again?” The government news stations had a policy where they weren’t allowed to state unconfirmed thoughts. So even if there was a likely suspect they weren’t allowed to say anything until there was substantial evidence.

“Probably,” Tyell grinned.

“They're so cool!” Mella took out her phone and adjusted its size to be tablet shape. Looking up more information about the incident–specifically if there had been any Dominous sightings.

“We shouldn’t support dangerous groups Mella,” Tyell provided reasonable sound advice. 

“Hehe, and that’s not stopping either of us!” Mella softly elbowed Tyell while he took a sip of his refillable can of soft drink. That advice would be good if the one he tried providing it to didn’t know he also thought the group was cool.

“Storybook heroes are real!” Dominous Hood’s reputation was that of an extremely old classic tale. Why? They outed corrupt businesses and made donations to many in need. Stealthy enough to not be caught but not so when it came to completely hiding their involvement.  

“Hehe, yeah they’re,” unbeknownst to either of them, while they were enjoying life–which had become much better due to their sister’s return–Ceella could hear them.

And the deep crimson anger within began to boil again. 

The ones that caused her to be trapped, took her away from her family, and made her miss her own father’s death! Were being celebrated by her own little siblings. 

God damn stupid PR! Those fucks! Dare play some stupid vigilante stick! 

She decided to stay outside longer to calm her anger. But she now added ‘teaching Tyell and Mella a lesson to her to-do list’.