Chapter 156: [Vol. 3 pt. 19] Patch 4.0: A Cat is Fine Too

While Alice and Serra clean up the kitchen, Aiko excitedly unpacks the virtual reality headset that she ordered and that just arrived.

“Is this it?” Aiko asks, holding up the floppy headband that looks more like something for working out than playing games.

“Yeah,” Ryouta answers.

“It looks different from what I was expecting. Isn’t it supposed to be like, a super high-tech computer and stuff?”

“It is. Everything is built into the band, and they made it like a headband so that it would be comfortable for everybody to wear.”

“Why’s the computer in your room so big if they can just squeeze everything into a little headband like this?”

“Because,” Cassandra chimes in, “desktop setups and ‘battlestations,’ as they called them, got really popular in the early twenty-first century, and then that just carried over. They made computers tiny and barely even noticeable, everybody who actually spends money on them got upset and started buying mods to return their comps to how it was back in the day, and then the big companies realized that they’ll make more money selling stuff that looks nice instead of being efficient,” she explains.

Aiko and Ryouta blink a few times at her.

“Yeah, what she said,” Ryouta says.

“I didn’t know you were such a huge nerd,” Aiko comments.

Cassandra starts growing red when she realizes she just nerded out a bit without even noticing it.

“I – I only know that because I kept seeing that sort of stuff while m-making my own computer!” Cassandra explains.

“You built your own? I wanted to do that, but I was worried I’d screw something up,” Ryouta says.

“Woah, you built your own computer? Does that mean you’re like, super smart? You really are a nerd!” Aiko says.

Cassandra’s face grows even redder.

“Wait! Don’t tell me… don’t tell me that having bigger boobs makes you smarter!” Aiko says.

The red drains from Cassandra’s face as she takes on an expression of bewilderment instead of embarrassment.

“That explains why I failed math three times! It’s because I don’t have any boobs!” Aiko whines.

“Ryouta, there’s something wrong with this girl,” Cassandra whispers to him.

Ryouta chuckles while rubbing the back of his head. He doesn’t know if he should correct Aiko or not. Obviously, there is more to her struggles with math than not having breasts, but he doesn’t have the heart to tell her that. Plus, it’s funny watching her think she’s bad at math because of that.

“So how does this thing work?” Aiko asks, returning her attention to the headband.

“I’ll have to sync it to my computer first – everybody else is going to have to sync theirs, too. Then you’ll be able to slip it on and get started,” Ryouta explains.

“Why does it have to sync?”

“Uhhh, to use the internet connection and security and stuff, I think. It kind of doubles as a uhh, what are they called, surge protectors?”

“I don’t really get it, but okay! You two should like, work with IT stuff!” Aiko tells Ryouta and Cassandra. “You’re both really good at all this!”

Ryouta only knows as much as Hoogle does, and Cassandra cringes at the thought of working in IT. “No thanks,” Cassandra says. “I always got harassed the moment guys found out I knew this sort of stuff, so I’d rather not work surrounded by sweaty guys wanting to rub their patchy beards on me just because I know how to look things up online.”

Ryouta laughs from her stereotyping. The image of somebody trying to rub a beard on her leads to him imagining her being surrounded by sentient beards all trying to rub her. For once, as weird as the thought is, he is not aroused by it.

“I’ll go start the syncing so that we can play later. It actually takes a little bit. No idea why,” Ryouta says.

“Okay! What should we do while waiting? Do you want to take a bath? Eat lunch? Or maybe you would like me?” Aiko says and then is punished with a chop to the back of her head from Cassandra.

“I’m going to go get in-game myself for a bit to figure out just where we are. Then I’ll be able to tell you where you should start your character at,” Ryouta says.

“Can’t I just start with you?” Aiko asks while rubbing her head.

“Nope. You’ll have to choose a small region that you want to spawn in, and then you’ll randomly spawn somewhere within its boundaries.”

“How am I going to find you? That sounds horrible!”

“We have a boat, so all we have to do is stay close to the coastline and wait for you to show up. Maybe your virtual assistant will be nice and help you start off close to us since it’ll be able to tell you’re our friend and are playing because of us.”

“Virtual assistant?”

“Yeah, an artificial intelligence that’ll be able to read all your memories, know how you feel – basically, it’s like a combination of the hardware in the headset and your brain.”

“O-oh,” Aiko says, her voice and expression meek.

Both Ryouta and Cassandra notice the change in behavior and raise their eyebrows.

“Something wrong?” Ryouta asks.

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“Oh! It’s nothing – it’s nothing. I promise!” Aiko says.

Neither Ryouta nor Cassandra fall for her forced positivity and the promise that she made, but neither of them question her about it either.

“The game isn’t going to like, sell all my data to the government or something, right?” Aiko asks.

“Probably not. The game is owned by the most powerful man in the world, so I doubt he cares about selling our info to the government when he’s probably rich enough to buy this country outright,” Ryouta explains.

“How’d he get so rich?”

“Creating new technology and making the world dependent on it, investing in other growing companies – stuff like that. “

“Ah! Are you two talking about Mr. Clark?” Alice asks from the kitchen as she loads the dishwasher with Serra’s assistance.

“Yeah, and about how he got so rich.”

“I met him once! He is a very kind man – very smart, too! I felt like I was a little kid while listening to him talk as I could not understand everything he was saying.”

“You met him? Seriously?”

“I did! He was curious about meeting real royalty, so he paid a visit to my family! We only had the opportunity to host him for a few hours, but everything you have likely heard about him is true.”

Ryouta is jealous for two reasons: one, he’s jealous that Alice got to meet the most powerful and wealthy man in the world; and two, he’s jealous because she met him and now he feels emasculated knowing that she knows somebody way more successful than him.

“I don’t have to worry about you ditching me for him, right?” Ryouta teases.

“Of course not, my hero! Such a joke is not even amusing! He is very far from being my type. Much too serious and I would constantly feel lesser from being around him,” Alice explains.

“So, you’re only dating me – us, because we don’t make you feel dumb?”

“A-ah! That is – that is not what I’m trying to say!”

“I’m just teasing you, it’s alright.”

“Hmph! I will tease you back later!”

“Hey, ‘hmph’ is Cass Cass’s thing even if she hasn’t done it for a while.”

“I – I do what I want! Hmph!” Cassandra says.

“See? Anyways, I’ll be in the bedroom immersed for a bit,” Ryouta says, getting up from the floor where he’s been sitting with Aiko to go slip on his own headset and immerse himself into virtual reality for the first time in a few days.

“Onii-chan! It’s about time!” Saya cries out while leaping up against Fenrir, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“It’s – it’s only been a few days. Is that all it takes to make you act clingy and lovey instead of tsun?” Fenrir asks. Even if he hasn’t been Fenrir for a few days, being him just feels more natural and immediately fills him with more confidence.

“I get lonely quickly! I mean… it’s not like I’m even active whenever you’re not here, but still! Ooh, is that Aiko?” The subject quickly changes. “She’s kind of cute, but between her, Serra, and me, I’m going to start thinking that I’ll need to call the police on you since you keep going after girls with small boobs.”

“Hey, Aiko doesn’t even look that young. She actually looks her age; she’s just flat.”

“Whatever you say, Onii-chan! It’s okay, I won’t report your pedo tendencies to the police.”

“I’m not a pedo! Everybody is over eighteen!”

“That’s what they always say at the start of those hentai games you play even though we all know the characters clearly aren’t eighteen!”

“But this isn’t a hentai game!”

Fenrir and Saya stare at each other for a few seconds before laughing together.

“It’s been a while since we’ve had a fun back-and-forth, Onii-chan.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I’ll try to give you more attention from here on.”

“Are you still going to try and make a haven for NPCs – AIs?”

“You’re in my head, so you already know the answer to that, don’t you?”

“I do, but I already know how all of our conversations would go! With that logic, I should never talk to you about anything since I know how every conversation would go.”

“You sound more like a god than an artificial intelligence.”

“Maybe I am? I am your kami-imouto-chan!”

“You’re a dork is what you are,” Fenrir says, flicking Saya’s forehead.

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