Chapter 27: 26

His Highness opened his mouth before me.

“Rebecca Slutarch. Who are you?”

“…What?”

“I’m asking who you are .”

“Y-Your Highness?”

His Highness raised his face that was lowered——he glared at me. My beloved ultramarine blue doesn’t look like the deep sea or the sky right now. Now it’s like a blue flame. It looks calm, but in reality, it’s burning my body with just its gaze.

I was confused and it turned into understanding when I saw that. This person is not the usual him I know. Right now, he’s just a man who doesn’t hide his intense anger.

“You’re my fiancée, aren’t you?”

When he came closer, I was afraid of being grasped by his arm. It wasn’t good when I unconsciously took a step back. [I don’t like it], his eyes say.

The arm that stretched out finally caught me this time.

“A-Ah!”

Suddenly the scenery became higher and I realized that I was being picked up. Next, when I was laid down face up, the place I was resting my back on felt soft. I realized that it was on my bed. And finally, I clearly felt the danger.

He looks down at me with his arms on both sides of me.

“Why are you trying to direct other women at me? Have you grown to dislike me?”

Danger signals were flashing in my head. I unintentionally lifted my body and crawled backwards(on my elbows).

“Do you want to run away?”

The distance I had barely managed to keep was quickly closed when he leaned on me.

“Are you afraid of me?”

He holds my face with both hands and forces our gazes to meet. Our noses are almost touching. There’s no escape. The blue color in front of me spreads and I tremble.

He slowly, as if to convince me, gives me an order.

“I won’t allow you to leave me. No matter how much you hate me, I will never let go. You will be my queen. I will never acknowledge anyone else.”

I held my breath unknowingly.

It was because his voice sounded like it was pleading.

The blue color that appeared to be shaking like a blue flame with too much anger. And at the same time, I saw a hint of sadness.

He buried his face in my neck. His Highness held me tightly and didn’t move. I could only move my fingers, but my head finally started to move.

The way his arm held me, the way he lowered me onto the bed, the way his hands touched my cheek, he was all so gentle, like he was handling something fragile. But why did I think of him as a stranger and feel afraid?

“Your Highness…”

“Even though I was trying to take care of you.”

He said something ominous, blocking me.

I tried to gather my thoughts and asked again.

“Does Your Highness think, ‘If we’re together, I’ll be okay’?”

“It’s not that pretty.”

His Highness looked up at me from the neck.

“These feelings aren’t pretty.”

But, our eyes don’t meet.

“I know that it’s too much to force this on you. But I only need you. I’ve only been looking at you. Don’t look at anyone else, don’t show yourself to anyone else. If you’re going to go to another man’s side, I will——.”

The outpouring of emotions stopped there. The gaze that had been poured around my throat went up,

“I love you, Rebecca.”

He said the words that condensed all the feelings and had all the feelings in his eyes.

I always wanted to hear those words.

The feelings that couldn’t be verbalized became a little tear and floated in the corner of my eyes. I was happy because I felt like he had received all my feelings, even those that couldn’t be expressed in words, when His Highness kissed me like he was sucking up the tears.

“I also love you.”

It seems that I have become tongue-tied without realizing it, probably because my nose has become stuffy.

His Highness’ response to that was a kiss.

I didn’t understand how to breathe, so I just shrugged it off and figured it doesn’t matter, and as I got better at breathing, even if I didn’t understand it again, I still didn’t let go of my lips, it was a long, long kiss.

***

Finally, my lips were released and I looked up at his face while still wrapped tightly in his arms. He showed no signs of letting go of me while lying down. The room was already dim, but now it was pitch black because the outside had become fully dark. I wonder if he plans to sleep here like this. This is my bed after all.

“Your Highness.”

“What is it.”

“Do you know about the book that I read often?”

The closed eyes were lightly opened. A pale blue looked down slightly and looked at me. He spoke to me in a small whisper, and in a lower and somewhat hoarse voice than usual, a reply came back.

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“…I’ve seen from the window that you’ve been reading something passionately for about half a year.”

“Do you know the contents?”

“No.”

“Do you have any guesses?”

“Yeah.”

Without a pause, I slightly stiffened my body in response to his quick reply.

“Sometimes you act like you know the future. It’s not a dragon’s power because it was before Phantom Beasts appeared. I thought that book might be related…Is it someone’s Phantom Beast’s prediction ability or something?”

“…No.”

“I see.”

“Would you like me to tell you?”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“…No, I think I can talk about it, but I don’t want to.”

“Then that’s fine.”

His Highness closed his eyes again as he said that. He held me tighter and shifted to find a comfortable position.

I was the only one who noticed the completely human behavior before he fell asleep.

“…I have a secret from Your Highness. I’m a bad woman.”

“I like Rebecca even if she’s a bad woman.”

I couldn’t find the words. [Bad] would be an understatement, I wonder if he understands the meaning of [villainess]?

“…Really?”

He shouldn’t understand. But I asked.

“It’s true. This feeling will never change no matter what happens.”

His Highness’ voice was low and small. Even though it was just the two of us here, it felt like we were having a secret conversation. It was like the kind of conversation you have before falling asleep. Ever since I was a child, I knew that the stories told to me that way were the truest secrets.

“About 7 years ago, there were times when I was bored every day. Now that I think about it, the responsibilities and expectations of being the crown prince weighed heavily on me. I didn’t realize it at the time, but… I was crumbling.

It was then that I decided to sneak a peek at my younger fiancée. When I made a hole in the window and looked through, she was a girl who was more mature than her age. She was cute and healed everyone around her with her smile and brightness. She was a kind child who spent time every day carefully choosing and picking beautiful flowers to give to her mother. I became the type to look at her when I had free time. It felt like I had found the sun.”

I remembered the flowers. Was His Highness watching that? Without saying a word, I just listened intently.

“It has been about three months. One day, in the middle of the night, I peeped at her. I was late with my homework and when I saw her sleeping, I thought I should sleep too. That’s when I found out for the first time. She cried alone at night.”

“…”

“She must have been lonely. Her mother had gotten sick and her brother and father were busy. She was smart enough to try not to be a burden to others. But she was still young enough to cry alone at night.

I watched the girl, wrapped in a blanket, crying silently without making a sound. And then I made a decision. I would protect her. I would marry her and make sure she never felt lonely again, and most importantly, I would treasure her.”

“…”

“That became my reason for living. Magic, swords, political science, imperial studies, horses, bows, I learned everything that could be useful. If I thought it was to protect her, nothing was difficult. I worked hard to become one of the top three students in my first year at the Academy. When I saw her a year later, I wanted to look as good as possible. The day we would meet for the first time, I couldn’t wait any longer and I left the event to search for her. And then I found her. Rebecca, you.”

(TL: Passive pronouns are killing me.)

“…”

His Highness gently touched my cheek. He pressed his forehead against mine and spoke kindly.

“Do you understand? I love you. Surely, not even one-tenth of this feeling is getting through to you.”

Even if I was told that, I still couldn’t voice it out. I knew that it would all turn into sobs.

Actually, I want to say “That’s not true.” and “It’s getting through to me, it hurts.” My chest, eyes, throat, heart, all hurts so much.

I can’t find words to express this feeling and it’s painful. This impulse, this pain of how much I love, I wonder how many more times I have to say “I love you” for it to be conveyed.

[Surely, not even one-tenth of this feeling is getting through to you.]

Yes, His Highness must be feeling the same way right now. We, who are alike, love and cherish each other so much that we can’t find the words and suffer. That’s exactly what it means [it’s getting through].

Will there be more happy days to come? I thought about it as I closed my eyes with a happy feeling.

Surely, it will come. If I’m with this person from now on.

***

“Emilia! You’re the one who planned it, right?!”

The next day, she rarely showed her anger and interrogated her friends.

“I was trying to support you seriously!”

“I’m sorry… but, but, I’m glad it turned out well.”

Emilia smiled bashfully. She thought she might forgive her because she was cute, but she still couldn’t get over her anger, so she declared that she wouldn’t speak to her for three days.

Emilia cried and made a scene through Melinda, without waiting for one day, so for the time being, her anger subsided.

 

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