Chapter 56: 55: Ethan’s Choice

Lunch Break, Archway Secondary School Canteen

Five weeks after the Battle of Avebury.

“Hey, loser.”

It was Jess, a shy smile on her face, lunch tray in hand.

Lately I’d been eating alone. Jess and Dee had been busy working on Jess’s power issue, and we had seen little of each other. Jess had become withdrawn in the last few weeks, scared of hurting someone by accident. Scared of killing someone by accident. She reminded me of myself when I’d first realised I wasn’t normal - except for her the stakes were a lot higher. If she killed someone because she couldn’t control her powers, she’d become a cursed one.

I’d become withdrawn too, deciding that the best I could do was give Jess some space. As a result, Jess and Dee had been thick as thieves since Avebury. Me, not so much. Weekends and evenings I’d been training. The rest of the time I preferred to be alone, dealing with what had happened.

Plus Dee was still uncomfortable with my weekends away with Section 13, or the ‘black boots’ as he called them. Now and then, she’d try to bring up the topic, but I waved her off.

I’d never been Mr Popular, but the other kids had sensed a change in me and kept even more distance than usual. Now Jess, Dee and I were also drifting apart.

“Hey,” I said to Jess.

I tried to smile at her, but it wasn’t easy.

I was still consumed with grief, anger and focus on my new mission.

Jess sat down at my table.

“So, I saw Joe the other day,” she began.

I nodded. I hadn’t seen Joe since the funeral. It was too painful to be around him, knowing that he’d dated mum for a while. Or so I told myself.

“He says he misses you at the garage,” Jess continued.

“Yeah,” I said, because there wasn’t much else to say. I missed the garage too, but with the way things were there just wasn’t the time.

Realising she was getting nowhere, Jess tried a different tack.

“Well, I have some good news, anyway.”

“What’s that?”

“Dee has solved the power issue, at least for the time being.”

“Wow, that really is good news.”

I lifted my eyes to look at Jess. The colour had returned to her face, and she was no longer moving as if she was holding her breath while walking on eggshells.

“How did he do that?”

“You mean how did she do that?” Jess bantered at me. A little poke. Just enough to get the first real smile out of me in weeks.

“Yeah, okay. Where are we with that, anyway?” I said, “The whole he/she thing?”

I’d been too busy to really go into the gender thing. It hadn’t bothered me after the initial surprise, but I was still vaguely trying to work out if Dee was a boy or a girl.

“It’s pretty straightforward. When he’s a he, we call him he, when she’s a she, we call her she.”

“Right. That’s simple enough, I guess. It might take a bit of getting used to, that’s all.”

I realised I was missing the point.

“Sorry, powers. Solved. Go on.”

Jess lifted her arms. Around her wrists were two black leather bands, each with three metal rings that held them together. The bands were marked with runes.

“Cool, huh?” Jess said.

Actually, they did look cool. The girl knew how to accessorise.

“What are they?”

“Power dampeners. They’re to help warlocks and witches train their magic – or, in extreme circumstances, to stop them from using magic at all. They prevent spells from getting out of control.”

“Huh,” I said, intrigued. “Where did Dee get them?”

“Yeah, that’s the thing. She remembered that the first cursed one that had been killed, the one in Bussage that started everything, had been a collector of esoteric and antique objects. Dee thought maybe the cursed one had been trying to find a way to regain his power, so she went to the house in spirit form. It still hadn’t been cleaned up as it’s an active crime scene.

“Turned out the cursed one had been trying to reverse the curse and owned a huge collection of genuine manuscripts and magical items. Or at least he did.”

“Did?”

“Yeah. Dee thought someone had got there before her and taken all the best stuff. But she found these and some books to help me train. In the meantime, these nifty little leather wristbands are keeping the power from spilling out of me.”

“That’s fantastic news, Jess,” I said, and I meant it. “Hey, where is Dee anyway?”

For the record, I actually did scream like a five-year-old at what happened next.

Dee materialised out of thin air right behind me, in his human form.

“BOO!” he shouted in my ear.

I jumped out of my chair like a cat being chased by a firework.

Dee roared with laughter, “Your face, Ethan, oh my days, your face.”

“Dee! Are you totally nuts? What if someone had seen you?”

“Oh lighten up, mate,” Dee replied. “Look, they’ve all gone straight back to their mobiles and pads as it is.”

I looked around the dining hall at the rest of the kids. Dee was right. After a couple of glances at my wail, they’d clearly thought ‘Ethan’s being weird again’ and returned to their screens.

“Fair point,” I said, calming down. “Is this going to be your new thing, scaring the pants off me at any given moment?”

Dee grinned. “It depends on how much longer you’re planning on keeping up this ‘journey to the dark side’ phase. Mmm, chips.”

Dee swiped a chip from my plate, and I couldn’t help smiling. Jess was still grinning at my reaction to Dee’s prank.

“What do you mean, ‘journey to the dark side?’” I said.

“You’ve been quite grim the last few weeks, Ethan,” Jess said. “I mean, we don’t blame you after everything that happened, but...”

“But we’re best mates,” Dee said, “And we won’t let you go through this on your own, no matter what happens. Understood?”

I felt a catch in my throat.

Then Forrest stopped by our table and the moment was broken.

Oh terrific, I thought, here we go.

Forrest still knew nothing that had happened after the demon hound attack at school, and I’d evaded him for the last few weeks, avoiding his questions. I just didn’t want to deal with it.

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“Hey guys, how you all doing?” Forrest said with a cheery smile.

“Uh, yeah, good,” I said. Jess and Dee nodded.

“Cool, well, good to see you all,” Forrest said. “We should all get together and hang out one of these days.”

“Hang out?”

“Sure, why not?” Forrest said, “I’ve just been so busy lately, I’m sorry about that. How about we get together over Christmas or something?”

“Christmas?” Dee asked.

Forrest was being genuine. Alarmingly so.

“Yeah,” Forrest said, “Why not?”

“Like Christmas Christmas?” Dee said.

I saw where Dee was going with this.

“Yeah, Forrest, isn’t Christmas a bit, you know...”

“What?” Forrest said, and off he went.

No sarcastic asides, no prying questions, no ‘Everything is gay’ comments. Forrest appeared to have had a complete personality transplant. It was unsettling. Jess, Dee and I looked at each other in astonishment.

“What was that all about?” Dee asked.

“They must have upped his medication or something,” Jess snarked.

“I don’t think so,” I said. “He seemed... happy?”

“You got any idea why?” Dee said.

I shrugged. “I’m sure we’ll find out sooner or later.”

We dropped it.

“But that reminds me, Ethan,” Jess said. “I was thinking about Christmas. It’s just a few weeks away and...”

She didn’t need to say anymore. It was the first Christmas I was going to be without my mum. My face hardened.

“I’m training during the holidays. I won’t be here.”

“Ethan, I’m sure you can take one day off from your murder plans.”

I scowled. “It’s not a joke, Dee.”

“I know, mate. I know. Sorry.”

Dee looked helplessly at Jess. Jess nodded back at him. I realised that at some point they’d already discussed talking about this with me.

Jess slipped her hand into mine under the lunch table. My heart did that beat skipping thing it does.

I should get that looked at, I thought. It can’t be healthy.

“Please, Ethan?” Jess said. “I know it’s important that you find Victoria, but... for me? Christmas here? With us? Your friends? Take a break from all the shooty stabby stuff?”

I looked at Jess, felt her warm hand in mine. Looked at Dee, who was doing exaggerated puppy dog eyes and a quivering bottom lip for extra effect. Which was doubly funny since his adopted family didn’t even celebrate Christmas.

I remembered that I’d promised to never leave my friends behind again.

“Sure,” I relented. “I’ll be home for Christmas, okay?”

Jess smiled, squeezed my hand, and then let go to continue eating her pizza slice.

She glanced at me with an innocent expression that was fooling no-one.

“So how about New Year as well?”

I closed my eyes.

I really wished she hadn’t pushed that little extra. Maybe if she hadn’t, things would have been different. Maybe if she’d just settled on Christmas, I’d have made a different choice. I don’t know.

Maybes, ifs, second guessing what might have happened if you’d taken a different path. It never helps anything. As I said a while back: maybe if I hadn’t gone to the Halloween party, none of this would have happened at all.

But it did, and the next choice was inevitable now.

I hated myself for what I was about to do. But if I stayed, everything would just be too complicated. Too slow. Jess and Dee would keep trying to hold me back and get in my way.

I had a new mission: Find and kill Victoria Pryce.

Nothing else mattered.

Christmas, New Year, friends, school. None of it could be allowed to interfere. Because if it came to it, Jess and Dee would try to stop me. And I needed to be ready for the next fight.

Section 13 was the only option. There was no room for compromise.

“I’m sorry,” I said.

I pulled back my chair, gave one last look at my two best friends.

“I can’t do this,” I said. “I’m going full time at the Section.”

Jess and Dee looked like I’d slapped them both.

“Ethan, no, that’s not the way…” Jess said, dismay in her voice.

Dee looked up at me, then turned his eyes away.

“Leave him, Jess. He’s made his choice.”

“Dee…” I started.

“Just go,” Dee said without looking at me.

I left.

Once I was outside the school, I called Moorecroft.

“Sign me up,” I said. “Full time.”

“I’m very glad to hear that, Ethan,” he replied.

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