Chapter 303: PSA S1: W.M.D

Grif, Ash, and Simmons are standing in front of red base.

"Hi, I'm Private Dick Simmons from the popular web series Red Vs. Blue." Simmons greets.

"And I'm Private Dexter Grif from the same show." Grif greets.

"And I'm Private Cyprus Ash from the popular book on Wattpad and ScribbleHub, The Weapons Guy." Ash greets.

"But you know what?" Simmons asks. "We're not here to talk to you today as famous actors."

"That's right, Dick." Grif agrees as Ash snickers. "We're here to talk to you as friends."

"Best friends!" Ash yells. "Maybe."

"In our show, Red vs. Blue, we poke fun at things like the military lifestyle and weapons of mass destruction." Simmons states.

"But weapons of mass destruction are no laughing matter." Grif says and Ash is about to say something till Grif turns to him. "No. Laughing. Matter." Grif turns back to the camera. "Each year thou-" Grif is cut of by a gunshot and a bullet traveling over their heads.

"Hey!"

"Wha?!"

"Loud Noises!" 

The three duck down and they get back up and look towards the cliff side.

"You- Cut it out, dick!" Grif yells. "We're trying to do something!"

"Hey, Red!" Church is heard yelling. "You suck, Blues rule."

"No!" Ash yells. "It's Red rules and Blues drool!"

"I see you!" Grif yells and he walks towards the cliff. "Oh yeah, I see you up there, buddy!"

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Ash and Simmons turn back to the camera.

Simmons continues talking for Grif. "I'm sure a lot of you have encountered weapons of mass destruction in your daily lives."

"Every day." Ash comments. 

"In facr, you may have some friends that think it's 'cool' to stockpile VX nerve gas."

"Uhhhh..." Ash looks to the side where a bunch of boxes labeled VX Nerve Gas are labeled. 

"But it's not." Simmons continues. "They may say, 'Everybody's doing it!'-"

"Everybody does!" Ash yells.

"-But if they told you to jump off a-" Simmons gets cut off as another bullet flies over head. "Son of a bitch!"

Ash and Simmons duck down.

"Almost got ya that time, chump!" Church yells.

Grif grunts as he runs by the two and into the base. "Oh, that's it! I'm getting my rifle!"

"And remember kids, violence is never the answer!" Simmons yells.

"But explosives and weaponry are!" Ash yells.

"You cockbite!" Simmons yells up to Church.

"Hey, I bet that one hurt!" Church yells back.

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10-28-2022

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