Chapter 79: To Break The Suffocating Silence

(From Blue's Perspective)

"Your Highness, I brought a dress that will cover most parts of your body," Ruby said. 

"Yes, good...," I mumbled and before I knew it, I broke down in tears. I covered my face with my hands. I could not even stop myself. It was embarrassing to cry in front of her, but my tears would not stop no matter how hard I tried. 

"Please excuse me," she said and hugged me. 'Thank you, thank you,' I wanted to say, but nothing came out of my mouth. 

Actually, I was crying because of two things. First of all, he was truly scary when he was angry. It was the first time he yelled at me and it was also the first time, I truly was frightened. No matter how much Father or Draven yelled at me before, I was never scared like this. But when Demetrius yelled at me, I felt like I was falling. It was scary, really scary. 

And secondly, what he said was perhaps true. I should not apologize all the time. It was not like I had done something wrong. But when he talked like that, I always felt like I should apologize. 

It took me a while to calm down and when I did, I met an angry Ruby. She was like fuming in rage for some reason. 

"No matter who His Highness is, he can't talk to you like that, Your Highness!" she objected. 

She must have heard the yelling since she was right outside the door. I could not believe she had to endure such an embarrassing event. 

"It was actually my fault," I said. 

"No, Your Highness. You've been very considerate," she said. "Full moons are really dangerous, yet you faced last night with a brave face. And look at your body. There are bruises all over, yet His Highness is yelling at you because you've been considerate? It's not fair. You should yell back and let it all out on His Highness."

I chuckled. "That's why he yelled at me. I didn't yell back," I said. "He wanted me to get angry at him. But think about him- it's not his fault as well. It wasn't like he wanted to be like that. It was a full moon and because of that, he had become like this, but he is behaving as if it was all his fault. Isn't he the one being unreasonable here? That's why I tried to tell him that it's not his fault. But then, he got angry."

"You're really nice, Your Highness. But this time, it's not your fault at all. His Highness is being really... He can be angry at us, but why is he being angry at you? It's not fair at all," she said. 

I laughed. "It's okay, you know. I should get ready now. He is waiting."

"Your Highness is an angel. How can someone be angry at you?" she mumbled as she helped me get dressed. 

She was smart enough to bring the right dress. I had too many bruises on my skin and if anyone saw this, it would be embarrassing. 

"Your Highness, how did you end up here? I thought you would be in the castle, so I had prepared an aphrodisiac for you, so it would not be too hard for you. But you didn't return and I did not see His Highness as well," she said. 

"I don't know that either," I said. "After returning to the castle, I'll find out about it. Oh, the doctor will come to see me as well. So after that..."

"... Your Highness, I think you should have some chocolate cake today. It brightens up the mood," she said enthusiastically. 

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"Alright, I'll take your word on that," I laughed. 

"Let me comb your hair, Your Highness," she said.

"Ah, I forgot I had hair."

She combed my hair and made a long braid. Demetrius liked it when my hair was braided. Guess, he was still mad at me. If someone yelled at me all of a sudden, I would be mad at them as well. But I could not be mad at him since he was half right about what he said. But about the other half, I was right. But since he was too stubborn, I could not tell him that. 

After returning to the castle, Demetrius took me to our room. None of us said a word to the other. He looked really angry and I was afraid that he might start yelling again. I did not like it when he yelled. He looked scary whenever he yelled and when it was directed towards me, it was even scarier. 

"The doctor will be here in a moment," he said as I sat on the bed. He was leaning against the bed frame. It was the first time he talked after a long silence that neither of us dared to break. 

I nodded and looked away. I never knew it would ever be awkward to be in the same room as my husband. But this time, I just wanted to get out or kick him out. As neither was possible, I decided to stay quiet and look away. 

But the silence was disgusting and suffocating. It was like the unspoken words and their weight was too much to bear. I should do something. But I could not think of anything but...

"Okay, so listen," I said loudly, standing up. "I won't apologize anymore as you said. Yes, it's true that it wasn't my fault. But let me tell you why I did it. You... you look really intriguing all the time and your words are even more intriguing. So, whenever you talk, it's like I have to do it even though you don't mean it. I don't know if it's your face's fault, or your voice's or yours. I really don't know. But I can't help but feel like apologizing. But you're being really difficult to deal with you right now."

"It wasn't your fault last night. How many times do I have to tell you? I know you told me not to say this again, but I have to state my point! You're being unreasonable to yourself and my words! Just because you're the king or something doesn't mean you can be unreasonable and also get angry because someone isn't agreeing to your unreasonable words! You can't be like this. And now because of you, I'm scared of making you angry because I get scared when you yell. Perhaps that's because it's you."

"Well, that doesn't mean that just because it's you, you can do anything you want. And I can't even get angry at you for some reason. I don't care if you'll take my word for it or not, but I'll say again that it wasn't your fault. And more importantly, you would never hurt me intentionally," I said. "And well, if you can, please don't yell at me. It makes me feel really sad and I get scared even though I don't want to be. And there are more things going on in my head. But I can't tell you that since I cursed you a lot in my head. Now if you want to keep on being angry, I don't care. Just do whatever you want!"

Letting it all out made me feel lighter. But after a while of yelling, I had no idea what I was saying anymore. I said whatever came to my mind and it did not matter if it made any sense or not. 

"... I don't mind talking now, but perhaps you'll get all flustered," he said. 

"Why? Why would I get flustered? You're the one who told me to yell. That's why I'm letting it all out! Now you want me to stop? Why do I have to stop just because you told me to? I won't!" I yelled again. 

His eyes were focused on mine as if telling me to continue. Something was off. I looked the other side of the room only to find a female doctor standing there along with Ruby. My cheeks burned up. 

'I just want to hide my face somewhere. My gosh, it's so embarrassing...'

Demetrius did not even tell me about it. He did that on purpose. He could give me a signal or tell the doctor to wait outside. Surely, the doctor had asked permission through her mind and he gave her the permission that way as well. This time, I was truly angry with him. 

"Check her full body and give her whatever she needs. I don't want to see a single scratch left," he said. I would have preferred if he had ordered this looking at the doctor. But he was looking at me the entire time. I had noticed this before as well. All the time, he never truly looked at anyone, as if he did not want to. That was the type of person he was to others. 

'Weird....'

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