Chapter 82: [Bonus ] Giving Up An Obsession Is Not Possible

(From Blue's Perspective)

He made his way to the closet and started rummaging through the dresses. I just stood there and watched my husband being childishly stubborn and find me a dress to wear today. 

As he was looking for a dress for me, my mind went back to our conversation. I could not believe he hid that important information from me and most importantly, he behaved as if he would do anything for me, only if I stayed by his side.

I had found out about his nature, thanks to the full moon. He did not want to let me know about it and because of that, he had been trying so he did not say about his desires aloud. I had to admit that he was right about this. His desires were indeed a bit creepy. 

But I knew that it was not just an obsession. If it was, then I would not be able to move as freely as I could now. But there was no way to deny that there was no obsession though it was good to know that he was trying his best. 

But I knew something perhaps he did not. Obsession was not an ordinary thing. And most importantly, it was not something that anyone could get rid of. It was impossible. Just how getting obsessed with something was hard, giving up the obsession was rather impossible. 

I decided not to tell him that I knew about it. It would stress him out and he might try to do something that might put his mental condition under pressure. Doing something against physical ability was one thing, but when it came to mental condition, it was not something one should do since it might lead to an unimaginable inner pressure. 

"What about this dress? It's light and the color looks good as well," he said. 

He held out a light crimson A-line dress made with thin fabric. To be honest, I did not care about what I wore. I just wanted to pass through the day without remaining naked. 

"Alright," I said. "But I still don't understand why we have to go to the garden."

"Why? Can't a husband and a wife spend some time together without any particular reason?" he said. He was not angry anymore as before and it seemed like he did not yell at me in the morning. It was as if the morning incident had not transpired at all. 

"No, it's not that... I mean, it's hot today."

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"That's why we're going to sit under the willow tree," he said. 

'Willows feature big, fibrous, and frequently stoloniferous roots, as well as profuse watery bark sap that is strongly charged with salicylic acid, soft, generally pliant, stiff wood, slender branches, and huge, fibrous, and often stoloniferous roots. The roots are notable for their hardness, size, and desire to live, and they grow rapidly from the plant's aerial portions. The leaves are usually elongated, although they can also be circular or oval in shape, and they often have serrated edges. There are no truly terminal buds; all of the buds are lateral. A single scale encircles the buds. The bud scale is usually fused into a cap-like structure, but in certain species, the edges overlap and it wraps around. Simple, feather-veined, and generally linear-lanceolate leaves. They're usually serrate, rounded at the base, acute, or acuminate. The leaf petioles are short, and the stipules are often prominent, resembling little, spherical leaves, and can last for half the summer. The staminate (male) flowers lack a calyx and a corolla; instead, they are made up of two to ten stamens, each with a nectariferous gland, and inserted at the base of a scale that is carried on the rachis of a drooping raceme termed a catkin, or ament. This scale is square, all-encompassing, and extremely hairy. The anthers are rose-colored in the bud but turn orange or purple as the flower unfolds; they are two-celled with latitudinally opening cells. The filaments are threadlike, pale brown in color, and frequently bald. The pistillate (female) flowers have no calyx or corolla and are made up of a single ovary with a small, flat nectar gland inserted at the base of a scale that is also carried on the rachis of a catkin. The ovary has one cell, the style has two lobes, and there are many ovules.'

"What are you thinking about so intently?"

"Nothing, just my photographic memory kicked in," I muttered. "By the way, why is there a willow tree out of nowhere in the middle of the garden? I mean, it's not something that's meant to be there, right? It's a royal palace. I had never heard of a willow tree to be in the middle of a garden, let alone a royal garden."

"Well, it's true that it's quite unusual for your world. But in the royal gardens of all five kingdoms, there is a willow tree in the middle."

"What?"

"Yeah, it's said that one of these trees possess the power to connect to the Moon Goddess."

"... Is it just a tale or is it a real deal?"

"I don't know. Actually, I couldn't care less. Who cares about Moon Goddess? She made weird rules for us that we got to follow like dogs. Why would I care about connecting to her? I want to do nothing with her."

'Well, wolves are a kind of dogs. But I better not say that...'

"So you don't like the Moon Goddess?"

"Of course, I don't. If I wasn't the Alpha, can you believe what could have happened? I would have another mate and had to live with her. So annoying! Fuck, I can't even think about it! Let's just forget it, okay? The willow tree is good even though the maker is total scam," he grumbled. "I just want you," he added in a whisper. But I still heard it. The words hit as if my heart was hit with a truck. I should control myself, or I might die because of this excessive affection though I was greedy enough to want more.

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