Chapter 1: 1. Prologue

*sigh*, I sighed as I stared in the small dirty, and old mirror, it was cracked in the right top corner. I gazed at the pale skinny little girl with messy red-pinkish hair, bored ruby-red eyes, and two cat-ears-like horns malformations on the sides of her head. She was staring right back into my own ruby-red eyes.

It was me. It always feels surreal, every time I see my reflection. I remember that I somehow reincarnated here, on this alternate Earth.

'Just like in the fiction my little sister pestered me to read...', I thought sadly, I still dearly miss my family, I know that I will never see them ever again and I accepted it a long time ago.

In my past life, I was your everyday human male and I was on my way to becoming a veterinarian just like my Aunt.

I still vividly remember the moment of my death. It was the first birthday of my baby brother, all my family and some friends were there. It was supposed to be a happy day. Surprise, surprise, It wasn't.

When I was coming back from the washroom, I looked at the Basilique Notre-Dame de la Garde through the window. Then I heard a strange low rumbling sound.

I blinked and the Basilique was thoroughly gone. In its place was an intense light that the Sun rays were cute in comparison, I also saw the shape of the explosion, it was a nuke. 

My brief eye contact with the explosion evidently made my poor eyeballs burn to a crisp. Not a pleasant experience 1/10, not recommended.

Luckily or unlucky, I didn't have the time to scream or really react to the pain I was going through. I did not stay blind for long since just after that I felt a drastic increase in the room temperature then nothing.

I died as well as all of my family and friends were present. Most of the people I knew as well as I died vaporized, just like that.

I regained consciousness in a warm liquid encased by fleshy walls with a tube where my belly button should be, it was comfy and I later recognized that this was the womb of my new mother. 

Most of my thoughts during that time when I wasn't sleeping were, why, why, WHy, whY, WHY DID IT HAPPEN!? Why did everyone have to die!? 

Until I came to one answer. Humans and it explained so much. I know the whole species isn't at fault for what happened to me but I didn't have anything else to blame and it helped me cope.

Though, that also didn't stop a strange feeling of disgust and a bit of hate from appearing inside my heart.

Five months later of going in and out of consciousness with the occasional breakdowns and I was reborn. I supposed I gained consciousness when my baby brain was 'developed' enough so to say, meaning I was probably in the womb of my mother for four or five months already, explaining the five months of waiting in this cozy darkness. 

The whole process of being born by being squeezed through something tight with a malleable skull is honestly quite the traumatic experience.

It was blurry, very confusing, disorienting, and cold. I'm grateful to my mother for carrying me for 9 months and giving birth to me. Giving me a second chance at life.

But abandoning me in an orphanage in the middle of nowhere, wasn't in the top 10 of the best welcome party I could think of.

I wasn't angry at them, per se, I don't know why they abandoned me or if there were other things involved. I was just disappointed and a little bit sad.

I finished brushing my hair with the old hair brooch I found. I clothed myself with a white plain pantie, a black skirt, and a white shirt, all worn out. I would prefer pants but it's basically all I have. All in all, I looked very plain. If we ignore my obvious glaring physical traits.

I exited my ridiculously small personal room, there wasn't much in it, a worn-out mattress, a blanket, books, pens, and decayed paper that I have found or stolen since I didn't have the right to go to school as I 'would disturb the learning of my better', I needed to learn Japanese by myself, meaning I'm probably shit, also I don't sleep with the other 'normal' kids as the old bitc-Matron liked to say since, in her little self-important point of view, I was a horned freak that should go die in the deepest part of Hell.

The old crone died four months ago of a heart attack, well that is what I have heard from the others and she was replaced by a new Matron she said she was from the 11 wards of Tokyo and she seemed proud of it, well I don't know what it really implies though.

The new Matron was less hateable in my opinion, she was extremely creepy though. The way she looked at the other kids as if they were cattle ready to be slaughtered, was a good thing that I passed under her radar of potential prey, not a good thing that she seemed curious about me.

And she managed to increase the number of 'adoptions' threefold. We were 39 when she arrived and now we are 23. That is what the other thoughts, however. 

From the books I have read, I inferred that I'm in the Tokyo Ghoul universe or something similar but I only watched the first two episodes of the anime and sadly I don't have eidetic memory even if in this life I feel I have a better one. 

But I know as a human I'm fucked unless I got squashed by a dozen metal beams with a man-eating psycho with tentacle arms.

She never ate with the other kids, in fact, I never saw her eat, period. After each 'adoption', which is usually the healthiest and oldest of the kids, she prepares little cubes of meat for us.

They tasted like pork, she said that was beef and it's obviously bullshit. It's human flesh, I'm sure of it.

And she gave me the most. I'm forced to eat them, but I only ate some of them. The rest is kept for my only source of sanity in this hell hole.

Eating human flesh. It's frankly disturbing on so many levels, it's cannibalism but I don't want the ghoul to have an excuse to make me become the next serving of meat cubes. So I endured.

The worst is that it didn't taste that bad and that I got used to it, fast, way too fast in my opinion.

I walked in the corridor barefooted, I didn't have shoes. While I ignored the comments of the other kids, Ox Horn, freak, emotionless doll, die, etc. 

I did get used to it and they are only kids, pitiful little kids so the impact was minimal at worst but my patience was getting thinner and thinner as more time went on.

They fear what is different and I ignored them, all of the tentatives of bullying were ignored by me and that seemed to spur most to try even harder.

Physical bullying was mostly non-existent, I could beat all of them one on one even if I'm physically younger and weaker than most of them.

They are mostly predictable and pretty dumb. However, I tried to evade all fights if possible, I would be fucked even if I win.

The day was probably going to go, as usual, eat, study, eat, study again then go to the abandoned house, and play with Bubble, a cute black Shiba Inu. He was still a puppy, then went to sleep and that's basically it. No TV or any of such things here to pass time. I hate this place.

And let's not forget my new gender, it didn't pose a big problem in itself, for the moment at least. I dread the real start of puberty, menstruation, and the tons of hormones and I'm sure I'm forgetting much more.

For the moment only my breast barely started to grow and it was a strange and different experience from my past life as a male that's for sure.

_______________________

It was getting dark outside. I noted.

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I was reading one of the few books available in the orphanage, alone in a random room. It was peaceful. I heard the door open, sets of footsteps then the door get closed.

"Hey, freak! You think you're smart but look what we've found!", I heard the voice of the most irksome brat in the whole orphanage.

His name is Tomoo, he is eleven years old, a typical Japanese boy with black hair and eyes and pale skin, he was only one year older than me. Some kids have strange hair color, just like me, well not as intense but clearly something you wouldn't see in my last life.

Tomoo was abandoned by his parents when he was 3 and I can only agree with their choice, if only he was abandoned elsewhere.

I closed my book, turned my head in his direction, and my gaze trailed off as I heard a terrified 'yap' and saw Bubble held by the skin of his nape by one of Tomoo's goons.

'No… nonononono this can't be!', I thought in abject horror, as my eyes became pinprick while my heart sank. I got up from the chair.

And immediately tried to catch Bubble out of the kid's hand only to be grabbed by another one from behind me. He was stronger than me!

"Let me go! Let him go!? Aaargh!", I cried out in distress as I struggled to get out of the grasp of the eleven years behind me. 

It was as humiliating as it was futile but it didn't stop me from renewing my effort. All the other boys started to laugh at my struggle.

"I never saw you this upset before! Hahaha! So Kaede the horned freak has emotions! You must really like that dog!?", Tomoo stared into my eyes and declared in delight as he spread his arms.

"He is right, you never smile, you never cry, you never laugh. You're really creepy. Are you even human? Maybe you are a ghoul! I bet!", his friend added with a sickeningly proud smirk.

"Okay cry, cry and start begging. If you don't, I'll make sure YOUR puppy does the crying for you...", he whispered closer to my face while keeping eye contact. 

He was close, close enough for me to kick him in the ball which I did, with all of my strength. 

"NRGTT!!", he groaned in agony falling to the ground while holding his crotch but he got back up shortly after, he was mad. I was pleased to see him suffer.

*SLAP*, he slapped my left cheek barely getting a reaction pit of me as my trembling eyes stared right at Bubble, I still noticed the skin of his hand was getting red from the slap.

"THAT WAS DUMB YOU BITCH! KICK. THE. MUT!!" he yelled, making everyone except me wince at how loud he was. However, what he said made my mind freeze.

*BAM* *CRASH* *whimper*

I flinched at the sound of Bubble whimpering in pain, and then something in me finally snapped. I felt strange, I felt whole. As if I was missing a piece of me for the last ten years. I felt liberated, better, free, and different on an instinctual level. A tingling sensation went through both of my horns.

*SLING*

The heavy iron scent of blood started to fill the entire small room, my white shirt became drenched in this same red liquid, painting it in a beautiful crimson red color.

*thud*, the boy behind me wasn't holding me anymore, too headless to do so. I didn't feel any shred of guilt for what I had done or simply couldn't he deserved it. While blood started to soak the wooden floor, touching my bare feet.

The gore does not perturb me in the slightest, I don't exactly know why. Maybe since I already see some fucked up shit at the veterinary school. Or I became a tad fucked up in the head.

"You are right. I don't think I'm human myself and I'm happy with this fabulous prospect.", I declared with a small smile on my face as I strolled in their direction making red footprints in the process. Blood soaking my entire body.

It confirmed the doubt I had for a long time,  my horns were not some malformations, the fact that I never got sick even once, my slightly increases healing rate, and the lack of scars after. It felt good to say it.

I then grabbed both of them by the neck with two of my four new appendages, lifting both of them from the ground with incredible ease. It was surreal. 

Both of the human boys started to struggle, grabbing empty air as they trashed around. Panic, fear, dread, terror, anguish, distress a melange of expressions was on their faces. I smiled wider at that and squeezed a bit harder. Increasing their panic.

My four new 'members' were ghostly arms with feminine hands and we were coming out of my spine, at the rib-cage level, I could control them so effortlessly and naturally. It was exhilarating to feel so powerful.

I crouched down in front of Bubble, tears started to trickle down my cheek as I examined the poor beaten boy.

He was breathing weakly and it was irregular, multiple bruises were found on his body, a broken right front paw, and his spine was broken in the middle. The last made me particularly furious. Nothing mortal, he will survive, so that's one 'good' news.

Without realizing it one of my ghostly hands instinctively phased through Bubble and he started to breathe normally, I passed my 'hand' on his broken spine and started to reconnect the bones, healing what I could, only the bones the nerve being too complex for the moment and a second did the same for the paws, this one was easier. 

Overall, it was rough and not the best. But I was pleased.

They seemed to work a bit like octopus arms, capable of moving independently with what I deeply desired but I could take control whenever I wanted. They were all me, not some other entities after all.

"But it will suffice. For the moment.", I murmured with a soft smile, happy that I could do this.

I scooped my puppy as delicately and carefully as possible and started to slowly hug him. He licked my right cheek, making me giggle innocently.

I looked up at one of the two individuals I hated the most.

"Do you want to play?", I asked coldly the two humans above. I will do it even if they don't want to.

They tried to talk but couldn't in their condition, I took their silence as a 'yes'.

I started to play with the two boys above with my… hmm what do I call them? Vector, I played pong with the two suffocating boys with my vectors.

I smashed them against everything in the room, making them bleed profusely, painting the wall red, destroying furniture, break their bones until I eventually got bored and cleanly cut their body to pieces ending with two bodiless heads, I did this by vibrating my vector faster making them into a sort of water cuter but way more practical and deadly.

'I need to run away…', I reckoned, I have these vectors like powers but I'm not dumb enough to actually stay and challenge the ghoul who probably knows how to fight unlike me, I could kill her by a surprise attack but it has too many risks and I smell of blood. 

I opened the window with one of my vectors, luckily it was the ground floor.

I exited through it, my bloody feet touching the soft grass. The cold winds barely felt against my blood-soaked cloth and hair. I walked as silently as possible but stopped in my track as I catches a glimpse of the eviscerated body of the Matron on the soil, under the moonlight.

My eyes wandered around until I saw a tall man wearing a pure white coat. In his hand was a strange weapon that looked like a lance, dripping blood. His hairs were blue starting to turn snow white.

He turned his head in my direction and I felt my heart stop. When his silver eyes behind a thin pair of glasses stared right into my own ruby one. I felt every fiber of my being screaming at me to run away. He was way out of my pay grade.

"Merde...", I quietly cursed in French.

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