Chapter 97: Morning Panic

"Mama, can I take this off? It hurts."

"You can't, Rinnie. We must protect you at all times, especially now that you are growing up."

I frowned as I looked down. Around my hip that was covering my private area was a hard metal that was locked. Mother said I should protect this area, but it grazed my skin and it was heavy. It kept me down on this floor while Mother was on her desk, writing.

I clasped my skirt and opened my mouth, but my voice wouldn't come out. All I could do was stare at my mother's back while she was writing something. 

'If I complain, she might not visit me again,' I thought, sighing as I stopped complaining about this metal. I just had to endure it. 

Endure. 

Be blind. 

Believe this was all for my sake. 

Even if it was cruel and confusing for a child.

Those words were what I often told myself. I only focused on the good things and refused to address or even raise questions. The less I spoke, the less mistake I would make. The constant fear of people leaving; the sheer thought of being left alone in this palace terrified me more than the cruel world. 

"Cruel..." I whispered as I weakly opened my eyes only to get blinded by the radiating light filtering through the window. My body felt heavy and sore. I clasped at the empty side where Hugo lied down. 

For some reason, I kept having dreams regarding my life in Everfell. Those dreams... more like the snippets of memories I tucked away, we're coming back to me. I wondered, why?

If I was going to live an honest life, I wanted to know the reasons for many things. Why Mother had told me many times not to give in to worldly desires? Why would she go so far as to make me wear that metal? What was she so afraid of?

Now that I thought about it, Mother told me how scary the outside world was days before the attack in Everfell. She mentioned something as to not let anyone touch me. What kind of touch? I had no idea. But those were her words;

"Rinnie, you are so lovely. Many people will try to covet you if they lay their eyes on you," I repeated the exact same words Mother spoke while she was cupping my cheeks. "If people try, run away as fast as possible. The world will abuse you if they caught you."

A shallow breath slipped past my lips, paralyzed on the bed, as I couldn't seem to get up. So, I had nothing to do but recall the memories I already tucked away where I couldn't remember them again. Not because I disliked what Mother said that day, but because I couldn't understand her. 

Why? Because I didn't want to dwell on things I couldn't understand. Remember? Never raise a question and never complain? I didn't want to get left behind by the few people I knew all my life. 

My eyes lowered as they flickered with bitterness. "I was also a bit frustrated since changing ways is harder than I thought," I mumbled, recalling Hugo's words. 

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Hugo was an honest man who wasn't afraid to express himself. If he wanted me, he would tell me. If he was upset about something, he would voice it out. He was akin to an open book it was contagious. Probably, because of that, I also started opening the pages of my life.

In exchange, I remembered things I didn't want to remember. 

"Does it mean I need to address them properly?" I murmured, breathing calmly while staring at the window. "But I don't want to..." — if I did, I was afraid how I see everyone would change. 

"Hugh, what should I do?" I whispered while closing my eyes, resting them again as I felt a bit weak and sick. My head hurts too.

******

During lunch, Hugo went to see Rinnie in her room to eat with her. Also, because the maid told him Rinnie barely touched her breakfast. 

"Rin..." he trailed off as soon as he opened the door, eyes landing on her figure on the bed. She was still sleeping, he thought. Hugo let out a shallow breath as he carefully closed the door and marched towards the bed. 

He perched on the edge of the mattress. "Rinrin," he called softly, extending his neck to check her face. She was truly asleep. It disheartened him to wake her up, but Rinnie needed to eat. 

"Rinrin, wake up for a bit. I will feed you lunch here on the bed," he offered, hoping she would wake up, but to no avail. So Hugo raised his hand to shake her shoulders a bit.

"Rinrin, wake --" 

As soon as Hugo touched her shoulder blades, he froze. Rinnie was burning. Hugo panicked as he planted his palm on her forehead, leaving his mind blank for a split second. 

"Help!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, almost growling as he rolled her until she was lying on her back. As soon as he laid his eyes on her, that was when he noticed her face was red and she was sweating buckets. His eyes instantly dilated as his hands hovering over her trembled. 

"Your Highness!"

Shortly after, three maidservants and a butler barged into the room in a hurry. They heard Hugo's agitated call, so they came in here in panic. 

"Call a physician," came out a dead and chilly voice. "Now." 

Hugo's eyes never left Rinnie's face as the space between his brows wrinkled. It was his fault that she was sick. All he could think was he was at fault; that he didn't consider her feelings and just succumbed to his emotions. Hugo was aware he went a bit rough on her earlier, so that was all he could think of the cause. 

His eyes glinted when he sensed the servants were still standing by the door. Slowly, he peeled his gaze away from Rinnie to them. 

His fangs showed as he growled.. "Now! Tell him to be in here within two minutes or I will tear his limbs apart."

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