Chapter 9: UBS08 – Company and Loneliness

The dinner was not anything special.

Rice, miso soup, grilled mackerel, meat and potato stew, and vegetable salad. Your average plain dinner. Nothing extravagant.

"Wow, Ken chan! I had no idea you were such an amazing cook!"
"Me neither!"

"Ah... its nothing compared to the dishes you sent me. I am sorry that you were served such a plain meal after all the care you have provided me. I could not do much with my still recovering body."

"N-not at all! It's really delicious, honestly!"
"I must say that this 'simple' meal is more comfortable to my old stomach."

"...If you say so." Gojima felt a little warm inside. How long has it been since he sat down and had dinner in such a homely atmosphere?

"Gojima san, I must admit. Your miso soup tastes waaay better than mine!!! And I am the one who is supposed to be a housewife!!! This is really frustrating you know?!!" Hanazono san pouted. It looked really childish, even though she was 28 (Source: Ubs). Cute.

"Well, my Aoi was really meticulous when it came to miso-" he abruptly stopped talking. Damn.

"...Gojima... san?"

"Ah... its... um... uh... your plates look almost empty! Would you like seconds? Feel free to ask, there is plenty enough for everyone!"

"...uh... yes, please."
"Yes, please."

"I really wish your husband were here too. We never met properly, right? Maybe I can invite you three someday over a... better dinner?"

"I cannot really say when I will visit my daughter again next time, and will Satoshi kun be here with her wife at that time." Baa san replied angrily. She really dislikes her son-in-law, doesn't he?
"Mama! Ah, my husband has been quite busy recently due to his work. He said that his company got a huge deal recently, so he was given a lot of responsibilities. I am sure he will become free soon! Then I can bring mama here and we can all have a fun party! We can invite Mi chan and Ruri chan and their family too!!!" Hanazono san said optimistically.

"I look forward to it." Gojima did not say anything anymore. Each person has their own secrets, their own family matters. Lets all be friendly and not cross the borders.

Like that, the dinner ended.

 

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"Mama?"
"Hm?"

"Who do you think this Aoi person was?"
"Not sure. He could be his sister, friend, girl friend or even wife."

"Hmm... what do you think has happened to her?"
"I don't know. He looked a little forlorn and quickly changed the topic. It would have been rude to pry further after that."

"... That look in his eyes, I have seen it before."
"You did, my daughter? Where?"

"...In your eyes. Whenever you remembered papa."

 

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"I could have handled it better, right?"

You would have to lie one way or other. Your wife and daughter never existed in this version of Earth, neither did the previous you. Even if you tell anyone about them, you would never be able to prove anything. My advice would be to claim Aoi as your ex-girlfriend whom you broke up with and be done with it.

"I am not sure whether I can lie to someone about them with a straight face..."

The only other option is to tell them directly that this is your personal matter and you do not wish to discuss anything about it.

"That sounds... rude. After everything they have done for me..."

It does.

"Sigh..."

Gojima lay on his bed and looked outside the window, at the night sky. It was clear and free of clouds. He could see all the stars clearly. The milky way was not visible though, thanks to light pollution.

"The stars... they still look the same."

That much is obvious. While this is not your Earth, it is still an alternate version of it with a slightly different history, not a different planet of some different solar system or galaxy of the same universe. So the stars and moons and planets will look the same as your previous world.

"Hmm..."

...

"Sometimes, I used to... you know, look for the stars Aoi and Sachi both became. They don't exist in this world, right? So they never became stars here. I will... never be able to see them again. Well, technically I could return, but that would mean I... uh... completed those objectives. Then I would never be able to raise my head and look at them, walk under the sky from where they are watching. Do you think they are worried about me? Watching my comatose body, lying in some hospital? Do they even know that my soul is not there anymore?"

...

"I... kinda died there, but now I am here. That kinda suggests that reincarnation is a thing, right? Are they also enjoying a new life somewhere, made a fresh start? I hope she is leading a much better life than what she lived with me. Are there magical girls in other universes? Is there a system for it? I hope Sachi managed to become one. She always wanted to be one. Or maybe, heaven and hell also exist and they went there? By there I mean, they must have gone to heaven, no doubt about it. Can they see me from there? Do the universes share the same heaven? But a murderer in one universe can be a savior in other, right? Maybe they can transfer to this world's heaven? Will they laugh at me if they saw my big tummy? Or how much I fumble before my students?"

Gojima...

"Or maybe, all of this is... just a long dream made up by my smashed up brain. This world is not real, you are not real, my neighbors, my students and colleagues... maybe its just my desperate attempt at clinging onto my flickering life. Its annoying to be hobest, I would very much like to go to my wife and daughter without these kinds of delays."

...Ken, look...

"I just miss them a lot."

Nobody said anything for a while. Gojima rose from his bed and went to the bathroom. He did not want to cause trouble for his neighbors. Bathroom seemed like a nice place to weep as silently as possible.

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