[Monday, May 27th]
I wake up when Chinatsu moves around. As I open my eyes, I see her looking at me with a small smile.
“Good morning. What are you doing?”
“Good morning. Nothing much, merely watching you sleep.”
“Sounds boring. What time is it?”
She glances at the clock. “A little after 5:00 and no, it wasn’t boring, you are so damn cute when you’re asleep. It makes me want to eat you up.” She leans in to kiss me for a few moments. “We probably ought to get up. We need to air out the room, change your bed sheets and take a bath.”
“Not just yet. Come here.” I tell her as I pull her on top of me and wrap my arms around her.
I love the way she just melts against me and the way she smells and tastes. I love the way she bites her lip to stifle her moans when she is feeling good. There are so many things I love about her I couldn’t begin to name them all. She never holds anything back when it comes to me, she’s completely open and honest. You tell me what there isn’t to love about her.
A couple of minutes later she tells me, “Sora, come on, we need to get moving.”
“I know, I’m just enjoying the feel of you against me.”
“I love it too, but it’s not like we can’t do this tonight.” She tells me, which makes me grin.
“True enough, I suppose.”
She kisses my neck, stands up and extends her hand out to me to help me stand as well. Smiling my thanks, I take her hand to stand, and walk over to the window to open it while she strips the bed.
Once I open it, I head to my closet to choose a change of clothes while she slips her dress on. Delving through the multitude of outfits, I spot a bright yellow, sleeveless, mini dress that Mama must have ordered after the fact since I don’t remember us ordering it. It’s really cute though, and the color works well for me.
“Sora, is that what you’re wearing today?”
“Yes, I thought I would wear this with sheer, nude stockings and my dark green pumps. You don’t like it?”
She shakes her head. “No, that’s not it. I just wanted to make sure, I thought I’d dress to match. Hmm… Okay, I’ll wear my yellow short sleeve blouse and my black and yellow checkered mini skirt with sheer, nude stockings and black heels. That will allow us to match well enough. I’ll see you in the bathroom in a few minutes. Oh, I’ll take the sheets down too, but I’m going to grab my change of clothes first.”
I tell her “Okay, thanks, see you downstairs.” She picks up everything, unlocks the door, and heads to her room.
I pick up my nightgown and slip it on. Gathering up my change of clothes, I head to the bathroom.
◇ ◆ ◇ ◆ ◇ ◆ ◇
After we bathe, start the washer and dress, we head into the kitchen to find that Mama isn’t there. Not really all that unexpected since it’s only 6:10. Mama and Dad should be getting up in about twenty minutes.
“Chinatsu, would you start making the rice, set the table, and make some tea? I’ll warm up the miso and grill some salmon. I think some tsukemono (pickled vegetables) would go well with everything too. Sound good to you?”
“Sounds delicious Sora-nee.”
I slip on an apron so I won’t stain my dress and busy myself with making breakfast for my family. I time it so everything should be ready a few minutes after Mama and Dad get up.
“Chinatsu, would you please go tell everyone breakfast will be ready in a few minutes?”
“Sure Sora-nee. Be back in a moment to help you finish.”
“Thank you. No hurry, the only thing left is for the fish to finish grilling and set everything on the table.”
Everyone begins filtering into the dining room as I’m setting the serving dishes on the table.
“Good morning everyone.” I tell them while smiling radiantly. “I hope everyone is hungry.”
Mama asks, “Sora, did you make all this?”
“No. Chinatsu helped too. She made the rice and tea.”
“You didn’t have to do this, you could have waited till I got up and we could have made it together.”
“I wanted to do it, Mama. It’s not as if this was all that hard. Besides, it won’t be all that long before we have to help around the house more and this is good practice for me too. Come on everyone, sit down and eat before it gets cold.”
“Mmm~ Sora, this is really good.” Honoka tells me.
“Honoka’s right, your cooking was fairly good to begin with, but it’s far better now. This is excellent Sora.” Mama tells me with a smile.
“Thanks, I tried my best. I’m happy that everyone likes it.”
Once we finish eating, Honoka and Dad head off to go clean up and dress for the day, while Mama, Chinatsu, and I start to clean up.
Mama turns around and leans up against the sink to look at us. “Girls come here for a second. I need to talk to you.”
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We stop what we are doing and go over to Mama.
“Listen girls, your father and I aren’t blind, we’ve known how you two feel about each other for a long time.” She chuckles when she sees the looks on our faces. “Yes, we also know what happened last night. After all, your bedroom is right over ours. We’re not saying you have to stop your relationship either. You aren’t related by blood. In this house it’s fine, be girlfriends and sisters, but the second you step outside of this house you are to act as if you are nothing more than sisters who are close to each other. Even if you know for a fact you are alone, you are still to act like sisters.”
She pauses and looks each of us intently in the eyes. “If you can’t do that, then stop now. I’m not saying you can’t hold hands or act like you two usually do outside the house, just don’t do anything that would cause problems. I shouldn't have to tell you what would be the result if they catch you, and I don’t want to see that happen. Your father and I aren’t willing to lose a daughter over this, so follow that simple rule and everything will be fine, is that understood?”
“Yes Mama.”
“Yes Mom.”
“You have to promise me, but if you break your promise you two will no longer be allowed to sleep in the same room, you will no longer bath together, and Sora will be moving downstairs into the room next to ours.”
“We promise.” We assure Mama who smiles at us and rubs our heads.
“Good. I know you two always keep your promises, so I won’t say any more about it.”
“Mama, thank you.”
She nods at us and we return to cleaning up. We finish cleaning in short order and we head upstairs to finish getting ready to go out.
Once we reach my room she wraps me up in her arms while I slip mine around her.
“Sora, I thought my heart was going to stop when Mom said they knew about us.”
“Mine too.”
We both know that in so many ways what we are doing is wrong, but we want and need each other. I hate that we have to keep this a secret, but Mama’s right: if it became public, it would cause a huge uproar. It’s not because we are the same sex or even that she is my sister. There isn’t any stigma attached to same sex couples like there used to be and I’m adopted, but two fertile females together? The hue and cry would rock the world.
At the very least, the government would tear me away from my family, place me with another far, far away and we would never be allowed to see each other ever again. So, saying we’ll have to be discrete is an understatement.
We talked about all this in the bathtub earlier. We're well aware that in the long run this can't go anywhere. I suppose I need to think about this a little more. I simply went with what I felt when I started this with her. I love her, that much is a given. Do I want to risk our relationship as sisters for this though? Of course, it might be too late to ask myself that now.
I keep thinking in circles about this, maybe I ought to talk to Mama about it. I can’t tell Airi, that is for sure, as she would have to report it. Mama might know best what I should do. I don’t want to lose Chinatsu, no matter what, that is the only thing I’m sure of. I’m fairly sure if I told her we couldn’t be girlfriends, merely sisters and friends, she would accept it. Truthfully, I have no idea what to do.
I sigh heavily, shake my head to clear away my thoughts and hold her a little tighter.
After a few minutes. she leans back slightly to look at me. “Come on Sora, we need to finish getting ready to go, or we will be late for the movie.”
“Chinatsu, which me is it you love? The me now, or the me then?”
She sighs and shakes her head. “There you go again. I love this here.” She places her hand over my heart. “I’ve never cared what you looked like.”
“If that’s true, then why didn’t you do or say something?”
“Honestly, because I was afraid. I was afraid of losing what I had with you. I was afraid that you might not feel the same way about me. I couldn’t count the number of times I’ve seen friends confess to a friend of theirs. When they confessed and were rejected, it all fell apart for them. I couldn't take the chance of that happening to us. You’re far too important to me. If you want to know why now. I suppose one reason is I saw that you hurting and doubting how I felt about you, so I kissed you to show you how much you mean to me.”
She pauses and looks me in the eyes. “Sora, if you’re having second thoughts about this we can go back to being sisters. I love the way you make me feel when you kiss me or we make love. Every time you touch me my heart flutters, but that pales in comparison to what I feel for you as my sister and best friend. Sex with you is like icing on an already delicious cake. You don’t have to have it, but damn it’s good. I would rather have you as my sister and best friend than take a chance of losing you altogether. No matter which you decide you want us to be, that won't ever change.”
She takes a deep breath and blows it out. “Do I want you as my lover? That’s a definite yes, but if I had to make a list of what is most important to me, I would say number one is that you are my sister. Number two is that you are my best friend and lagging far behind in third place is that you are my girlfriend. Choose the first two, or choose all three, as I said, you decide. You know how I feel.”
“Chinatsu, you light me on fire when you touch me. You already know that. There are times when I look at you and feel as if I can’t breath. Right now, all I want to do is tear all of your clothes off of you, throw you on the bed and spend all day making love to you. That’s how much I want you. Is this worth it though? We have a few years, at most, to be together this way. Who’s to say that when we go back to school that you or I won’t find a boy we like. I know that I’m special to you, but I also know that you find boys attractive as well. Well, I can’t say as I’m not the same, after all, there are some boys that I find attractive. I’m not saying it’s going to happen in my case, especially if it’s the boys from our school. I detest so many of them that it seems highly unlikely.”
I sigh. “I’m getting off topic. We talked about this in the bathtub this morning. Sooner or later we will have to find a boy to marry and we will have to have children with them. There’s no way around that. Not unless one of us magically changes sex and we know that isn’t possible. Grr~ Damn it! I hate being so bad at getting out what I’m trying to say! I think what I’m trying to say is I’m afraid I won’t be able to give you up if…”
She places a finger on my lips to interrupt me. “Sora, stop. You’re overthinking this and getting too worked up.” She leans in and kisses me for a few moments. “Now, take a deep breath. Who knows what tomorrow brings? Neither of us do, nor will we ever know. Could I fall in love with a boy? Of course I could. Is that boy likely to push you out of my heart? Never going to happen.” She reaches down and takes my hands in hers. “These right here hold my heart. I might make room for other people in it, but they will never be able to touch my heart like you do and they will never be able to take it away from you. However long I live, be it five minutes or five thousand years, I’m yours. Even after we get married, I have plans for us. I have no intention of ever giving you up as long as you want me. The question is, do you want me as your girlfriend?”
I chuckle softly. “How do you always know the right things to tell me? This tattered and torn little heart of mine has been yours since we were four. You’ve always been the glue that has held me together. I love you, so of course I want you as my girlfriend.”
She nods. “Then that’s all there is to it. I’m yours and you’re mine, simple as that. If one of us meets a boy we like then we will deal with it when it happens. I’m not going to waste my precious time with you worrying over what might be. Now give me a kiss and let’s finish getting ready to go out.”
I pull her tightly against me to kiss her and she melts against me as the kiss becomes deeper and more ardent. I finally break our kiss a few minutes later.
We spend the next twenty minutes braiding my hair and of course, putting on our eyeliner, mascara, and lip gloss. Once we finish we head over to Honoka’s room to collect her.
I can’t go into a lot of detail about our morning and afternoon out, because honestly, what happens this evening largely overshadows what we did while we were out and leaves the majority of the details fuzzy for me.
We went and saw the movie. All three of us enjoyed it a lot and we talked about it all through lunch. We dragged Honoka into two different lingerie stores to have her measured and replace her horrific underwear. She tried to be stubborn about buying new underwear. Well, let’s say she is weak to my puppy eyes and let it go at that. Chinatsu and I spent about an hour picking out Honoka’s new underwear. Oh, did you know that the bigger a girl’s bra is the more expensive it tends to be? Yep, hers are roughly a third more expensive than mine. I know you’re curious, go ahead, ask. She’s a 92D. Told you she was bigger than Mayumi. Of course, you didn’t hear that from me.
We got her seven much cuter and more age appropriate bra and panty sets. Honestly, she would have given herself away the first time another girl from school saw her old underwear. Yes, it was truly that horrific. No teenage girl would willingly be caught in what she wore for any reason.
From there, we dragged her over to Tokyo West, where after twenty minutes of arguing and a call to Dad later, we spent another ninety minutes picking out ten very nice dresses for her. After another ten minutes of arguing and I threatened to call Dad again, she gave in again to six mid- and mini-length skirts and a dozen blouses. It might be needless to say it, but we made her change out of what she was wearing into one of the dresses.
I also got her some stockings in nude, black and white, heels, strappy sandals, and some slouch boots. Please, don’t tell my Dad, but I kinda went overboard shopping for her and we ended up spending a lot more than planned. I think it was ¥191,633 well spent considering that now she really does look like she's a normal, everyday fourteen or fifteen year old you would see walking around.
Oh, one other thing, I asked Honoka how many people were people watching over us since I never saw any of the others. She extracted a promise out of us that we would never tell Dad that she told us, which we agreed to. There are twelve people assigned to watch over me and another twelve for Chinatsu and that is just the people in the immediate vicinity. There are also two heavy weapons teams, whatever that means, watching over us. Dad was not kidding when he said he majorly upped security around us. My hope is that it’s never put to the test.
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