Chapter 1: Oneshot

Protag was just minding his business when a scantily clad little girl with big pointy ears pointed a staff at him. Next thing he knew, he found himself in some sort of grove. Before him was an older scantily clad woman with similar pointy ears and large breasts.

Woman: “Please sleep with me.”

Protag: “I refuse.”

…

Woman: “Why?”

Protag: “We’re not married.”

Woman: “Oh…”

Girl: “What the hell are you doing!?” The same little girl from before appeared. “There’s a busty-ass elf literally begging for your seed.”

Protag: “And?”

Girl: “According to the rules of your world…” She pulled out a h**ntai comic. “This is the precise scenario where you should be boning by now.”

Protag: “Are you sure? I don’t have a condom. And I don’t know her, though I do have first impressions that she’s, uh—what’s your name?”

Woman: “Celica.”

Protag: “Celica’s a pretty nice and wholesome woman. But I kind of need to get to know her better before doing something so intimate.”

Girl: “But at this rate, we won’t be able to repopulate.”

Protag: “I assume you brought me over for that purpose.”

The girl nodded.

Protag: “Might I ask, am I only man you’ve brought over to this world for the sake of repopulation?”

Girl: “Uh huh, uh huh.”

Protag: “And, at any point, have you considered bringing more men over.”

The girl shook her head. “Not possible. Only 1% of human men possess the ability to live in this world.”

Protag nodded his head. “And I’m assuming you only give birth to females. Correct?”

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Realization dawned on the girl as she hesitantly answered.

“Y-yes.”

Protag got closer, leaned down and held his face inches away from the girl’s. With eyes devoid of any compassion or empathy, he stated the following.

“I’m not fucking my daughters.”

…

There was a cold silence in the air. It was broken haphazardly by the girl.

“Okay, I get your concerns, but listen here. It can’t really be considered incest if it’s with a different race.”

Protag: “That’s racist.”

Girl: “You’re racist!”

Protag: “And now you’re just being facetious.”

The girl then got on the floor and started flailing around. “Damn it, I want you to sleep with us! I wanna, I wanna, I wanna!”

Protag: “This unseductive display isn’t really doing you any favors.”

Celica: “Village Elder, I think we should give this man some time to reconsider. And if he really doesn’t want to help, we should send him back.”

And so, Protag was given his own cottage. With affordable housing, he was able to indulge in his favorite hobby of eating bread and watching grass grow.

As for what happened to the elves.

Celica went on to become a glam rock singer.

Village Elder became a prolific doujinshi artist.

The rest of elves died or whatever. I don’t know.

The end.

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