Chapter 14: 14 – A guy? Even better!

"So this is your dwelling, Goddess Sen." Celes spun around with a wide smile on her face.

I let out a wry smile and said, "It sure is. Though... are you sure you're fine wearing that?"

"Hm?" Celes tilted her head and said, "Whatever do you mean?"

I blinked and then let out a deep sigh. "Nothing. And I guess if you don't mind, I shouldn't either. Still, this is awkward as heck."

The ten pull gacha was... Well, it was something. We got outfits that managed to get us back to my house without getting into any trouble. And I pulled some ridiculous things that were never going to see the light of day as long as I lived, but that didn't matter.

What did was that we were back in one piece and wearing warm... if a bit ridiculous looking outfits.

I had managed to pull that [Flowing Water Dress] so I handed it over to Celes to keep her warm. The light blue dress suited her looks a lot... but it also clung to her curves. And like me, it seemed like Celes didn't wear any bras.

As for me...

I glanced down at my clothes. Or rather, at the skin-tight red one-piece with an open back and a *way* too short skirt that left literally nothing to the imagination.

-VI|IV-

[UR - Black Kite]

The outfit worn by a woman who watched over a legendary ninja. Though emotionless like a puppet, she too learned of motherhood in watching the boy who would become the greatest of them all. While worn, you can utilize perfect presence concealment as well as veil another person's presence.

-VI|IV-

Objectively, I had to remark that it was beautiful. If I looked in a mirror right now and saw my appearance, I would definitely give it a 10/10.

BUT I'M A FREAKING GUY! WHY?!

[Note: In order to become an excellent idol, it is essential to be in tune with your feminine side.]

Don't give me that hokey guru crap! I don't want to be an idol! I just want to be cool! Have fun! Enjoy life! Get girls!

[Note: User input has been received.]

Argh... Why do I even bother?

I sighed and then locked the door behind me. After that, I made my way to the kitchen.

...And this outfit is surprisingly cozy. I didn't notice since I was panicking in embarrassment and worry that we'd be caught and questioned, but the fact that my boobs weren't flopping around and seemed well supported-

I froze and then screamed.

"Goddess!" Celes quickly ran over. "What is the matter?! How can your devoted servant aid you?!"

I let out a deep sigh and shook my head. "It's nothing. Just... This form is really taking its toll on me."

These weren't 'my' boobs, dammit! I didn't have boobs! I'm a guy! I have pecs! And I have a #@! Not a #!

[Note: Research has shown that attempting to reject gender identity will result in severe mental stress and trauma-]

Shut it! This is all your fault! Scammer! @$$#*$&!

[Note: User input has been received.]

I took a deep breath to ignore the growing headache and then finished making my way to the kitchen. After that, I started boiling some water in the kettle. When that was started, I turned back to Celes and said, "Would you like some tea, Celes? Something to warm you up? And are you hungry?"

"Ah." Celes shook her head, causing her golden hair to scatter behind her. After that, she let out a bright smile and said, "Simply basking in my goddess's presence is enough sustenance for me."

I let out a wry smile. "I appreciate the kind words..."

And dammit, did I wish she was saying it to me when I was a guy.

"...But you should make sure you're healthy. Or do I have to command you to do so?"

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"No, my goddess. Then..." She fidgeted and said, "I am a bit famished. I have yet to eat anything all day after being on the run."

"Then take a seat. I'll make us some food and we can introduce ourselves."

"As you will it!"

I smiled and then turned around to rummage in the refrigerator. But as I did...

Holy crap. Is she delusional? The system said there wasn't anything wrong, so did I just pick up someone with severe middle-schooler syndrome?

I get that I'm a total bombshell right now, and it was pretty miraculous that I saved her... but that's some scary devotion I'm getting out of her.

The English royal family wasn't really like this, were they?

Wait, this was a different Earth, so maybe they were?

Dammit. Why does Japan only teach Japanese history?!

[Note: Because-]

That was a rhetorical question!

I pulled out some eggs and then grabbed a few packs of ramen out from the pantry. After that, I filled a pot with water and set that to boil as well.

Celes looked at me and then nodded. "To live so humbly despite being a goddess... I am even more grateful to have pledged myself to such a kind and humble being."

I opened the packs of ramen and sighed. "Again, Celes. Not a goddess. I might look like one, but I'm just a normal human, you know?"

[Note: User is currently far from a normal human. When compared to the elite performers of this world-]

I didn't ask you! And why are you so talkative now anyway?

[Note: Managing the mental health of the User is also VIMS's prerogative.]

I'm not crazy!

[Note: User input has been received.]

Celes smiled. "Even if that is true, my Goddess. The fact remains that you saved my life from an absolute end. That alone is enough to have my eternal gratitude."

"...And what if I'm really a guy, huh? For all you know, this could just be a disguise?"

[Note: User. It is not recommended-]

Celes's eyes widened and she grabbed my hand. "Truly?! Then... If that is so... Would you be my groom?!"

...

[...]

Hey, System-

[Note: Yeah, I don't know what's wrong with her either- *ahem.*]
[Note: Scans indicate no abnormalities.]

Wait! I saw that!

[Note: The System will undergo maintenance in accordance to the user's input. <Notes> will be temporarily disabled.]

Oi! You ###! Don't run away! You've got a #$ ton of explaining to do!

"My beloved Goddess?" Celes stared at me with her bright violet eyes, filled with love- No, worship and adoration.

I let out a strained smile.

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