What Do you Mean All Dungeons are Girls!!!? Enhanced Edition

Chapter 4: Chapter Three An Elf’s Misfortune


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A branch snapped beneath her bare foot, as she twisted around a tree. Something caught on the branch, and a tearing sound reached her ears. A moment later she felt the breeze across her chest, as her boobs bounced freely. She cursed. Today just wasn’t her day. She looked back, but didn’t see anyone. Although she did see part of her bra hanging from a tree. In the distance she heard footsteps, they were getting louder. The girl cursed, she hadn’t lost them yet. With a sigh, she mumbled a spell, and cast her hand backwards in the direction of the closing footsteps. With a whoosh, a bolt of fire sailed through the air, and past several trees. An instant later, a loud scream echoed through the woods, telling her that she hit something.

A flash at the corner of her vision told her she had a new notification. One she didn’t have time to check, she hoped it was a kill notification. Her day had been going well until these assholes decided it was a good idea to attack HER carriage. Well mostly well, Mother wasn’t too happy, and was sending her off to the retreat, but as far as she was concerned that was infinitely better than having to interact with that... THING that dared to court her. She had no interest in him, but yet he kept coming back. Which is why she had smashed his face in with a vase the last time she saw him. He deserved it. The cursed guards stopped her before she could burn his stupid thing off. Which in her opinion he also deserved. Who were they anyway to interfere with the righteous punishment of a royal? Who cares if that THING was also supposedly a royal, he wasn’t even an elf.

She whipped around another tree, her ears straining for sounds of pursuit, as she made her way deeper into the woods. At the moment, she didn’t hear anything, but she kept going. Her mind however drifted to her aching feet, and the stinging of her skin. She had lost her shoes at some point, and the branches of the forest had torn her clothing, and scratched her skin. Vaguely she was aware of the arrow sticking out of her back as well. Not that she could do anything about that. Not until she found someplace safe to settle down, and tend to her wounds. That thought reminded her to check her status.

She wasn’t exactly in the best shape. She had less than half her mana, and her shields were under half as well. Although that was much better than it had been when she took the arrow. Reiko had taken a few hits while escaping the bandits, her damn guards hadn’t done a good enough job of protecting her. By the Infernal Plains they had been bad enough that she had actually lost the benefit of that magical protection. Hence the reason she still had an arrow sticking out of her back.

Feeling her stamina start to give out, the young elf slowed down. Her ears picked up only the usual sounds of the forest. No sound of pursuit nor the worrisome sounds of predators, or worse monsters. Looking around though all she saw was the dim lighting under the dense canopy. She didn’t feel safe here. Reiko pressed on. At this point she had no idea where she was, but lessons from long ago told her she should seek shelter. What that meant she wasn’t entirely sure. She hadn’t really paid much attention. She cursed her servants for all dying to the bandits, one of them should have been here with her to help her find shelter, and a way back to civilization. With that thought in mind she clutched her mage staff, and bag tighter, and rounded a tree.

After a while she noticed a light ahead. The very sight invigorated her, and she picked up the pace. It took her only moments to clear the distance, and she found herself in a wide clearing. In the middle was a stone structure, ahead of her were steps leading up to a flat top. All around the clearing she noted marker stones, and the entire space had a feeling very different from the rest of the forest. It felt utterly welcoming. She might be safe here. Reiko made for the steps, and ascended them to the platform. Which was a wide flat space with four pillars in each of the corners, and in the center was a pool of clear water. She idly noticed that the building was aligned with the compass points, and seemed old. Its surroundings had long been overtaken by the forest, yet this place was untouched. A sign that it was protected by the divine. Filled with relief, she rushed to the pool, barely even noticing the presence of the statue. One is carved in exquisite detail and depicts a perfectly proportioned naked woman with a pair of wings, and two horns on her head. Her pose was quite lewd, and her belly swollen with child. Yet none of that registered in her mind.

Reiko dropped her staff, and bag at the edge of the pool, and dipped her hands into the pool. Finding the water to be perfectly clean, and inviting. She quenched her thirst, and then shed her ruined clothing. Slipping into the water, she winced a bit as it stung her wounds. As the blood and sweat rinsed away, vanishing quickly as the blessed pool cleansed itself of the contaminants. Awkwardly she stretched in the water, reaching for the arrow. As she did, she caught her reflection in the water. 

Reflected back at her was a round face with large sapphire blue eyes that looked like gems upon her face with a cute nose, and a small mouth. A pair of pointed ears stuck out and parted her long blue hair, and her pose made her small bare breasts stick out, looking larger than they really were. She paused briefly when she caught the reflection, she had looked better, and once again she cursed those bandits for her misfortune. 

A moment later, she got a firm grip of the arrow, and she pulled. The sudden pain as it came out with a chunk of her back caused her to scream. That hurt, way more than it had going in, and she had not been prepared for it. As blood poured from her fresh wound, she muttered another spell. This time a healing spell. As it completed, a gentle light washed over her wounds and soothed her pain. In moments the wounds closed, including the large one on her back. For some reason, her spell seemed to have a bit more effect than normal, and after a single cast she no longer had any cuts on her pale skin. Just in case, she cast it again, and felt even more of her pains, and aches vanish with the second cast.

A quick glance at her status, showed that her health and shields had gone up further, but her mana was down even more. She now had just a little over four hundred points of mana. Yet as she watched it ticked up a point. It seemed to be recovering a little faster than normal. Perhaps an effect of this place?

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With that in mind, and feeling safe she took a moment to bathe, before climbing out of the pool, and rummaging through her bag. She had some spare underwear which she quickly dressed herself in, and she had a couple of dresses. Rather than pick one right away however, she felt now would be a good time to pray to her god, and patron Yiran.


Yiran blinked his heavy eyes, as he prepared to sleep. For him, it was late, and he had been rather busy dealing with an upstart young god. If they weren’t both of the Light Pantheon he would have smited that upstart. Sure Yiran was part of the Elven Pantheon of Light gods, and that upstart what was his name... Aurus? No,.. Aurumi?, no Aurous that was it. Aurous was part of the Human pantheon of light gods, he was quite young as gods went, recently ascended from a god's point of view anyway. His rise had only been in the last hundred years. Honestly, Yiran found him to be an exhausting and self-important little prick. It would make his day if someone would put that upstart in his place. Only reason he didn’t do it himself was thanks to cursed politics.

His line of thought was broken by a ‘prayer’ reaching him. It was that damn royal again. She had been such a sweet little girl once upon a time, and now she was just as rotten as that upstart prick. With a sigh, he turned a mind’s eye on her, and felt a spike of joy when he noticed where she was, and more importantly what she had just done. It was only a technicality, but she had given him a perfect way to get rid of her. He wasn’t so sure about foisting her on Dewari, though. Dewari was a dark goddess, one of the oldest. Older than him in fact, and he honestly liked her. Actually on second thought, Dewari might actually love having an extra charge.

With a wave of his hand, he brought forth a book, and some paper. It was time to put a spoiled brat in her place, and teach her for constantly making demands of a god. The arrogance! He hoped Dewari would teach the girl some humility, she sorely needed it, and he had a feeling that Dewari might actually have the time unlike him. In a moment, it was done, she was no longer his.


Dewari watched with amusement as her young charge’s first monster introduced herself. It was especially interesting since neither had a name yet, and one of them wasn’t quite aware that they were a girl. Of course, Dewari had told them, but they hadn’t listened. She had a feeling when they finally figured things out it was going to be quite interesting.

As she enjoyed the sight of a young dungeon denying the fact that she was a girl, and seemingly chalking up the use of the word ‘mistress’ as an error on the part of her own monster. It wasn’t of course. Dewari suddenly received a missive. 

I have a dreadful young charge in desperate need of some humility. Her last prayer alone was practically audacious. The spoiled girl effectively demanded that I return her to her home, and punish some bandits for slights against her person. I hope you can teach her some, especially since she not only prayed to me from one of your shrines just now, but she bathed in the waters you blessed. As I recall, that used to be part of your rights for minting a new priestess. I’m sorry I had to drop her on you so suddenly, but dealing with that upstart is exhausting. I don’t have time to discipline spoiled mortals on top of that. Especially in light of the seal being so close to breaking. I hope you have had some progress on preparing for that, as I sure haven’t. I curse that damn upstart Armi for this.

She read along, and shook her head. Giggling a bit when she got to the end, trust Yiran to get someone else’s name wrong in the middle of a letter. It wasn’t the first time she had seen him do that. Often when he was both mad, and exhausted. It seemed he really was at wit's end dealing with the upstart. She was glad Aurous wasn’t part of her pantheon or in Yiran’s case part of an allied pantheon. It meant she didn’t have to deal with his shit.

With a sigh, she turned her mind to the poor mortal who decided to pray to him at her shrine at such a poor moment. Dewari had little doubt he only did it because he was exhausted, and in a ill-mood already thanks to Aurous. She didn’t really know how bad the girl really was. So Dewari decided it was only appropriate to give her a trial. It wasn’t hard to find the girl, with a snap she put the girl to sleep, and pulled her away from the shrine. Dewari figured they would have a chat later. One that would help her decide what to do with the sudden new charge.

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