When I Loved You

Chapter 82: CH 82


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Her tears dropped on Muyeol’s shoulders. But strangely, the tears weren’t of sadness. Crying made her feel lighter, as if she could finally let go of an invisible burden. She had thought that she was living normally, but it seemed she had held onto all the wrong things so far.

“You must be feeling relieved,” said Muyeol as he let her down in front of the shower.

Yiyoung stared at him, amazed by how well he seemed to know her. Had he suggested all those things despite her disagreement because of how well he knew her? She was curious as to how Muyeol knew her better than herself.

Muyeol turned on the shower, carefully controlling the temperature. Suddenly, the back of his neck caught her attention; it was completely red. It was then she realized that despite all the difficulties, Muyeol was doing his best to take care of her. She frowned, now feeling bad.

“How’s the temperature?” he asked as he held out his foot to check it himself.

“It’s fine.”

“Okay, I’ll start now,” Muyeol told her, and she allowed him to take complete care of her.

He was good at taking care of her, perhaps even better than professionals. As he rubbed the soap down her skin, Yiyoung flinched. But she wasn’t the only one feeling embarrassed; Muyeol’s neck had somehow turned even more red.

She silently wondered why he hadn’t simply hired a caregiver for her. Did it mean that Muyeol held special feelings for her? She had never considered that question  before, but she was beyond curious now.

Soon the shower was over, and Yiyoung sat down, a huge towel wrapped around her body. Muyeol brought out a hair dryer and began to blow-dry her hair, not avoiding Yiyoung’s eyes as she stared at him.  Eventually, he began to comb through her hair to help it dry faster. As the warm air blew her hair back, it rose to its usual volume. Yiyoung had already had a small face, and now, her face looked even smaller.

When Muyeol took out new underwear for Yiyoung, she said, “Give it to me.”

He wordlessly handed her the underwear.

But then she heard a rustle and said, “My clothes, please.”

Muyeol gave her the patient gown, and she put on the top first. However, when she bent down to put on the pants, a pang of pain shot up her waist. Yiyoung clenched her side, trying to will the pain away. But the pain was expected; one of her organs was severely damaged now, after all.

Muyeol helped her sit on the bed before putting a hand out, silently gesturing to her to hand the pants back to him.

Noticing her hesitation, he said, “You’re hurting, aren’t you?”

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Left without a choice, Yiyoung handed the pants back to him. Muyeol knelt and grabbed her ankle. But the feel of her skin against his hand startled him for some reason. Desire warmed him up again; he was feeling aroused more often now.

His eyes widened, feeling the hot blood rushing down his body. He had thought he was resisting his desire well so far, but this was driving him crazy. He couldn’t look at her, afraid that if he saw her legs, he would want to have her. He wanted to kiss his way up her legs and belly, and brush his lips against her scar. Then, he wanted to kiss her small, perky breasts.

The pounding of his heart traveled to his head. In the world of his imagination, he was kissing every inch of her body, and heading toward a particular destination.

This was crazy. He couldn’t believe he was imagining such things.

Yiyoung stared at his frozen form. She had felt it, the tremble in his hands as he tried to dress her up. It had happened earlier, too—when he was washing her body with soap. He was trembling, but his touch was gentle and delicate. Again, she wondered why he hadn’t left her on her own.

Yiyoung poked his thigh with her toe. “What are you doing? Put the pants on for me.”

Muyeol couldn’t lift his head. He clenched the pants, his knuckles turning white.

Yiyoung smiled. She had never seen him act like this before, and she found it quite endearing. Since she had assumed him to be self-centered, she had thought he was going to be selfish when it came to matters like love or physical desires. But seeing him like this made her realize how wrong she was. And it also made her wonder what it would be like to date him.

‘Well, I wouldn’t know until I actually date him, right? Then I should just start now,’ thought Yiyoung.

“So…” Yiyoung said quietly, still poking his thigh. “As you know, I almost died.”

Muyeol gulped as she spoke, his heart burning inside. He thumbed the ring on his hand, remembering how he had almost lost her. So he reached out and touched her legs again, the sensation of her skin almost making him dizzy.

‘Get it together, Cha Muyeol!’ he scolded himself.

“Like you suggested, I’ll take a leave of absence for a year,” she said.

“What?”

“I said, I’ll take the leave of absence,” she repeated.

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