Chapter 20: 20

I didn’t answer for a moment and simply stared at the boy.

It felt like something hot in my heart was burning and spreading and then getting stuck in my heart.

With a reddened face, I blinked my eyes and said,

“What do you know?”

Then I quickly slapped the boy’s hand that had touched my odd-eye. As if I was burned by his body temperature.

The boy steadily looked at me with eyes that couldn’t hold images.

“I know everything.”

He didn’t know how comforting these unsuspecting words were to me.

Ironically, I received a little peace like a baby in a cradle, at what the boy, who would one day come to take my life, said.

I felt like I had been of some use, instead of the mere contemptuous girl who even her parents wanted dead. 

But instead of saying thank you to the boy, I crouched slightly and laid down with my back against him.

“Don’t talk nonsense… Stop, go sleep.”

Suddenly, raindrops were gently tapping the ground outside the window.

Breathing hard like a newborn deer, I began to struggle with insomnia. After visiting the royal palace, I couldn’t sleep easily.

Whenever I tried to sleep, I always had nightmares. A dream in which the longed-for mother appeared.

“Try to die this time.”

The sad thing about waking up from a dream was…… That I had a bad dream, but I couldn’t say I was going to forget it.

Because that dream was just a repetition of reality. It definitely happened to me.

What if I stopped living now?

What if I could quit all the tedious regression and exhausting survival?

‘I’m so tired now.’

I curled up as if all hope had been exhausted. Suddenly, transparent tears flowed nonstop.

The hurt feelings that had been put off because I was busy until taking care of the boy suddenly burst out when I had time.

At that moment, the boy’s voice quietly enveloped me like a shadow from behind.

“Are you crying?”

I wiped my tears away and replied

“No.”

I didn’t cry.

“It’s just that I don’t want to hear the sound of rain.”

I made a random excuse, not caring whether the boy believed me or not.

Then, the boy came up to me and wrapped his arms around my shoulder.

Why did I suddenly think of the burn marks on that boy’s shoulder?

“I will protect you.”

Without realizing it, I shed a sneer. I died, but also came back to life. On this subject, just who would protect whom?

He couldn’t even see straight ahead.

“Don’t think like that. In the future, if someone treats you like that, I’ll punish him.”

The boy must have been thinking back to what I said earlier.

I said that if he heard my name, he would also run away, perhaps also saying that he was unlucky to have met me.

I said there was something terrible on my face.

These weren’t words that suggested to keep thinking about it……

The boy’s hand, approaching cautiously like raindrops, patted my shoulder and lulled me to sleep.

“No matter what’s on your face, whatever your name…”

“…….”

“You will be the most beautiful and precious thing for me in the future. I will worship you like a god.”

To worship a girl who was cursed, abandoned, and lived in a poison swamp. It was not even funny.

Even though I thought so cynically, my heart felt so at ease that, before I knew it, my eyes were half-closed.

I slept as deeply as if I had died.

Somehow, I didn’t even dream of that day. That was the last day. I never saw my mother in my dreams again.

The quiet night without nightmares passed in a flash, and the morning sun poured down into the hut.

It was a very still morning.

The sound of birds were heard in the distance.

Blink, blink. When I blink my closed eyes a couple of times to open up my vision, the face of the boy who fell asleep facing me was the first thing I saw.

He was covering my ears with both hands while sleeping.

It was clear that he truly understood and believed what I said about crying because I did not want to hear the sound of rain.

It was only then that I realized that thanks to it, I was able to sleep soundly, without the sound of rain or thunder.

I felt the warmth seeping into my chest and gently wrapping my heart. Like wings trying to hatch a hardened heart.(TL/N: likely referring to how birds add heat to hatch their eggs.)

Then, the boy woke up.

In my presence, the boy opened his eyes silently and stared at me with mysterious bluish-violet eyes.

Why did the curse wizard take away the boy’s eyes, not his voice, or his hearing?

It must have been because he was so jealous.

It was beautiful even though he was blind. The dawn sky, the moon, and the wind were all contained in those eyes.

I slowly took the strangely strong hand that promised to protect me.

I felt like I wanted to hold onto it for a long time.

The boy looked at me and smiled.

“Did you sleep well?”

* * *

We had become very close since that day.

While we were sleeping, eating, and living together, Rixus also brightened up quite a bit.

His face no longer made the expression like he was hitting the wall in the dark all by himself.

For some reason, that fact gave me a little comfort.

I, who thought of myself as useless, felt like I had been of some help. And that made a hole for me to breathe.

“Rixus, you didn’t eat the herbs again, did you? I told you not to skip it.”

Little Rixus covered his mouth with his hand. He was afraid I might put some herbs in his mouth like last time.

“It’s the least delicious thing I’ve ever eaten in my life.”

“…It’s not that bad.”

“It’s very bitter.”

“Medicine originally has a bitter taste! It’s better if you acknowledge it and eat it.”

The boy turned his head away. 

I couldn’t see his face, but anyway, seeing him turn his head, it seemed like he didn’t want to eat it.

After arguing for a while, I thought deeply.

‘He’s a child, but if I logically persuade him, he’ll probably listen to me.’

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‘After all, doesn’t this boy become a very smart man when he grows up?’

“Look, Rixus.”

I took a deep breath and said calmly.

“I told you, you’re cursed by a wizard and your eyesight disappeared.”

“…….”

Then, as if he had a little bit of interest, Rixus turned his head towards me. The hand also fell from his mouth.

“Generally, the curse works by reducing the function of the eye.”

“So?”

That’s right. Wasn’t it convincing? Surprisingly, it was possible to have an adult-like conversation?

“So, you can lessen the effect of the curse a little bit with herbs.”

“I do.”

“Okay, then, say ‘ah’.”

Rixus covered his mouth with his hand.

“No. I won’t.”

…This damn boy! Time to give up on conversing like adults.

I took something very precious out of my pocket with my small hand and showed it to him.

It was candy. It was considered a waste, so I only bought it once a year.

“If you take the medicine, I’ll give you candy.”

“…?”

“You said you’ve never tried candy. Don’t you want to try it?”

Some days ago, Rixus said he had never eaten candy before. When he was young, his mother was very strict, and after the storm…… 

It was understandable why he didn’t eat it.

So now, with a curious expression on his face, Rixus ate the medicine and took the candy. As soon as he shoved the candy into his mouth, his expression blurred for a moment.

It seemed that he had received a small shock from the sweet taste.

The boy’s cheeks reddened faintly.

“Sweet.”

I smiled and looked at the boy. Because he looked cute.

“Like you.”

Then, my eyes widened in surprise.

‘What is this kid saying?!’

The boy looked at me without self-interest and smiled.

“I’ll call you ‘candy’ if you don’t tell me your name.” The boy munched on the candy and added a little shyly. “It tastes like you.”

“…….”

At this time, I became very shy. Hesitating slightly, I said,

“I don’t even have a single sweet tooth… Call me ‘Toothed’. Candy doesn’t suit me.”(TL/N: 씀바귀 is literally toothed ixeridium, a species in the sunflower family, native to East Asia, a perennial plant whose leaves and stems and produce a white juice with a bitter taste. I decided to shorten it to ‘Toothed’ because it doesn’t quite make sense to have such a complicated nickname.)

The boy laughed softly.

“Candy.”

‘I’m nothing like candy?’

I blushed a little, avoiding Rixus’ gaze, even though he wouldn’t be able to see it.

Then I got up from my seat.

“Anyway, don’t call me that… I’ll go pick blueberries.”

“See you later, Candy.”

“…Don’t call me that, you idiot.”

I opened the door of the cabin with a hidden grin.

At that time, I could feel a hand coming from behind.

“You have to come back quickly.”

The boy’s face looking up at me was filled with faint anxiety, showing his tender heart.

When I saw the expression, my heart fluttered with affection.

I held his hands tightly and answered him fondly.

“Yes, I will.”

* * *

Left alone, Rixus quietly leaned his face out the window.

He moved his unseeing eyes and wondered where she was going…  

Luckily, there was an occasional breeze carrying the scent of the girl.

It put his mind at ease because he thought she would be back soon.

‘Why won’t she tell me her name?’

‘Who is she?’

‘Why is she living in a place like this, alone?’

‘Has she been abandoned?’

Rixus’ face darkened for a moment. He closed his eyes slowly.

Then, he tried to imagine the girl’s face in his head.

His only wish was to see it once.

The face of the person who saved him, took care of him, and cared about him.

Just one look…….

I want you to.…..

“I’ll never forget you.”‘

In fact, his legs had long been healed under her utmost care. He could walk, but he deliberately did not walk in front of her.

The girl was likely to leave when she found out that he was healed.

He was afraid of that.

With a body like this, he would be able to hold a sword…… Normally, he would have started practicing fiercely so that his skills did not wear out.

Only to survive.

While struggling to survive in the Imperial Palace, Rixus often thought ironically that he wanted to die.

But being in this hut was different.

He wanted to live with the girl.

He wanted to put delicious things in their mouths, laugh together, and hold and put her to sleep while listening to her whining on a rainy night.

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Rixus felt the wind by the window and followed the girl with blurred eyes.

“…….”

Suddenly, he parted his lips as if answering the wind.

“You can take my eyes forever.”

‘If only you could stay with me like light in this darkness.’

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