WHILE YOU’RE IN LOVE
“Yesterday, you went to the ball with him?”
I didn’t want to believe it, so I asked again.
I couldn’t believe Aslan who was always kind could be so cruelly indifferent to me.
Rosalyn hesitated and answered.
“Yes.”
Her answer did not change at all.
It was all true. Even if I didn’t want to believe it, the unbelievable fact was the truth.
Rosalyn, who was looking at me, said in a tone of embarrassment.
“Didn’t you hear from Aslan about the ball yesterday?”
Rosalyn blinked rapidly with her big eyes. Her bewildered expression was evident.
“I’m sorry, madam. I thought it was a conversation that had already happened between Aslan and his wife—”
“No, no.”
I took a deep breath and changed my words.
“I was mistaken for a moment. Aslan spoke to me about the ball but I thought it was on another day.”
It never happened. Aslan never said anything about the ball to me.
But I made it up as if I had belatedly remembered the fact that I had forgotten for a while.
It looked like my idea worked. Rosalyn continued speaking with a relieved expression.
“I’m glad. I was afraid his wife would be offended. As you know, I don’t have a close family member, so Aslan, a distant relative and guardian, takes care of me a lot. He’s really such a sweet person.”
“Right.”
“Oh, also , there’s no particular reason for his kindness to me.”
“…….”
Is that so?
Knowing the future of the two already through the “original work,” I could only smile bitterly.
But Rosalyn, who had no way of knowing my mind, asked excitedly.
“So is madam going out with us today?”
“Going out?”
“Yes, because Aslan said he would buy me a dress today.”
Ah.
They went to the ball together yesterday, and now they will go out again together today to buy a dress.
It was an ordinary dating course for young men and women to go to the dressing room together and choose dresses.
‘Two people… … .’
In the stylish dressing room, I could picture Aslan smiling affectionately while watching Rosalyn changing her colorful dresses as if she were doing a fashion show.
It was also in the original story. At that time, I was happy to see his sweet side.
But when I imagined that scene and imagined me being caught in the middle like an uninvited guest, my throat was choked.
“… … I’m not feeling well today, so I don’t think I can go out.”
I struggled to end the disastrous conversation.
“So, enjoy your time with Aslan.”
After breaking up with Rosalyn, I turned my feet immediately. To my bedroom, not Aslan’s office.
It wasn’t because I heard that Aslan was going out with Rosalyn soon to buy her dress.
The reason I wanted to see him was gone.
The reason I wanted to meet Aslan today was to ask where he was and what he did yesterday.
Why didn’t he look for me yesterday. Maybe he forgot our promise. I was curious about that.
I didn’t mean to blame him.
I didn’t mean to complain about why he didn’t keep his promise and why he didn’t show his face once after making me look forward to it.
I just wanted to know his mind.
But now I didn’t have to ask. I could tell where Aslan’s heart was headed without asking.
I knew where Aslan’s heart, his eyes, and all his nerves were headed.
I was ill again for a few days. This time it didn’t hurt. It just broke my heart.
I didn’t want to meet Aslan. I was afraid of the end of our relationship coming out of his mouth.
Luckily, I was able to avoid encountering Aslan for a few days. He didn’t come to me because he was paying attention to Rosalyn ,but running away from people was one of the few things I’m good at.
There are times when the traces of the past you want to erase are helpful.
Maybe in the distant future, there will come a time when the three years I have spent here will be helpful to me.
With that thought in mind, leaving this place didn’t seem so painful.
‘…… lie.’
Laughing at myself, I walked to the statue on the edge of the patronage.
Behind the statue in a rare place, it was my own secret place to visit when I wanted to hide.
I leaned back on the statue and caught my breath. The tension in my body, which had become sensitive to avoiding people, was relieved and fatigue rushed in.
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shaa-
The wind blew.
I looked around, tidying my hair behind my ears, fluttering in the breeze.
Glittering green leaves, colorful flowers, and… …
Is it a trick of fate? That I saw them.
I looked at Aslan and Rosalyn in the distance, frozen in place like a tree rooted in the ground.
Hidden by a huge statue, I wouldn’t be seen by them, but I could see them.
There was no expression of the two people facing each other closely. However, only the movements of the two were clearly visible.
Rosalyn grabbed him and said something, and Aslan leaned down.
The shocking sight made my eyes wide.
Am I looking at it properly? What’s wrong with my eyes?
I wanted to have vain hope.
The two people who were gradually becoming one were clearly seen in a clear view.
Aslan’s head tilted, his face clung close to Rosaline.
Close enough to think of the expression “nose touch.” No, more than that…….
“Oh, my.”
I covered my mouth with my hand. A trembling hand barely blocked the sound from squeezing through my throat.
If I let go of my hand right now, I think my scream will be heard far away, so I tightened the hand on my mouth so that I can’t breathe.
But the only place where the force was put in was the hand. I couldn’t give strength anywhere else. It was the best I could do to keep my shaky legs from collapsing.
Shivering as if I had been baptized with ice in the cold winter, I tightly closed my eyes.
I couldn’t even open my eyes to see the scene where the two were kissing.
Even though I closed my eyes for lack of courage, my heart was beating as fast as if I had actually seen it.
My head was dazed by the dizzying feeling.
After a while, I barely opened my eyes.
Fortunately, the two were separated. Just imagining it makes my heart ache, but if I actually saw these wo people kissing…… .
Although the distance was wide enough , the two were still standing facing each other.
Rosalyn, who raised her head nodded, muttered, and Aslan responded.
What did they talk about? I was curious, but I didn’t want to know.
I lowered my head helplessly and stared at the floor until the two of them left.
saaaa.
The wind blew again. The air around me, which had previously felt warm, felt faint.
I clasped my trembling shoulders with both hands. But even my hands were cold, so it was not comforting.
“ah.”
thump.
Drops of water fell on the ground.
It looks like it’s raining, I have to go in soon. If I catch a cold because I’ve been in the rain for a long time, that would be another inconvenience.
When I thought about it that way, it felt strange.
On my head, on my shoulders, on my trembling hands. I couldn’t feel any dampness anywhere.
Nevertheless, the water kept dripping on the floor I saw.
I raised my head. The sky was blue and clear.
“……ha.”
Only then did I know it wasn’t raining.
I touched my face. My palm was covered with water.
Since when have I been crying?
Sweeping my tears with my hands, I tried to stop crying.
Stop crying. You’re a fool.
However, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop my tears flowing down like a broken faucet.
The first time I met Aslan was the week before my 18th birthday.
I still have vivid memories of that day.
It was a cold winter day when snow piled up to the ankles the night before.
When I opened my mouth, white steam came out, and it was so cold that even my hair froze.
“Are you Helena Larestine?”
I couldn’t see properly because of the backlight. I lifted my head.
‘He’s tall.’
It was only when I lifted my head close to the point that my neck hurt, I saw the face of the person speaking to me.
Just then, the clouds moved, revealing his face in detail. I opened my eyes wide in surprise. It was because he was dazzlingly beautiful in the faint sunlight.
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