Chapter 102: Chapter 101

I hummed quietly as I moved in tandem with Alessia to the silent beat that only I could hear. One of her arms was laced around my waist, while the other was close by with her fingers interlaced with mine. The constant contact had my skin tingling with tantalizing fire. As we slow danced, my heartbeat grew heavy, and I found my face flushing.

I wasn't naïve. I knew what these feelings were. This wasn't the first time I've had feelings for someone, and it's not like I hadn't explored relationships with the same gender. I just hadn't expected to fall in love this hard. The worst part is, I don't even know why. Perhaps the drinks were making me like this, or maybe the drinks dredged up what I had repressed.

"What is it, Empress?" Her words teased me gently from my thoughts as I shifted my head to look up at her. Her golden eyes stared into mine with all the adoration I could hope for. My heart lurched slightly in my chest as I fell into her gaze.

Each heartbeat felt like it took an eternity as I stared at her. The heat rose in me agonizingly slowly. "Nothing."

A sly grin crossed her face as she tightened the grip on my waist and hand and pulled me closer to her. Not that it was a bother to me. But quite the contrary, I really enjoyed it. But I struggled with expressing myself as much as I should, and this situation really reinforced that issue. I was an emotional wreck. "What are you thinking about, Alessia?" I rested my head against her shoulder as we danced further on.

"Well, doing this with you reminded me of the last time we did this."
Whatever sense of euphoria I was having was swept away by a tide of guilt and shame. I had almost forgotten what I'd done. I've changed her memories and everyone else's. "Tell me about it." I didn't even believe it when she told me she didn't hate me.

"We were dancing together, much like this. Laced around each other in silence." She guided me along a path of her own making, and I followed along, working on eating away at my sense of reservations.

"Alessia, do you truly not hate me?" Our pace increased slightly, and I closed my eyes to fight the wave of nausea that was growing in strength as my world swam.

"I would never hate you. I've told you this before." She pulled me close, and our faces were inches from each other.

"I know, but then I think back to what I did to you, and I can't help but think that some part of you does." Curse alcohol and its effects on me; I'm never usually like this.

"You gave me a life to live, a purpose to fulfill. That is something that I can never hate you for." Our dance came to a pause, and we held each other.

I didn't understand why I was like this. Why was I falling for a spirit? But I stood at a crossroads now. The biggest problem that I saw was that if I pursued this if something went wrong, then I'd risk our entire relationship. But yet, the wine that I'd had drank earlier was pushing me in the opposite direction. After all, was it so wrong to take what I wanted? I stared into Alessia's eyes as my thoughts went wild, as a handful of emotions slammed into me like a hammer. "What do you feel then?"

"That depends on you, my dearest empress. What do you want me to feel?" As the words left her mouth, I realized that she had just thrown the ball back in my court.

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She wanted me to make that choice. Since it's been clear from the start how she felt. Was this a romance of my doing? I crafted her with my own hands, and I guided her along a path of my making. So did this make it right? Was I forcing her to have feelings for me? Was it fair to her? The questions mounted in my mind one after the other, though, with each passing second, my mind became murkier as I tried to fight through the growing haze.

"Did I tell you how that memory ended?" She broke the silence and brought me back to reality.

"No. How did it?" My breath hitched in my throat as she closed the distance between us. My mind begged for what was to come, yet I was still nervous. I wanted nothing to go wrong. Yet If it happened, I knew it would take us past the point of no return.

"How do you think it did?" Her words were sweet as they slithered into my ear. Her lips were mere inches from my mine, so tantalizingly close. She kept throwing the ball in my court, which drove me nuts.

A sigh escaped from my lips, and I pressed my forehead against hers. "I don't know what you see in me." I shifted my arms to rest across her shoulders as I carefully enunciated each word to stop myself from slurring them.

Her arms fell to my waist as we danced on. "I see a woman who cares about her people. Someone who puts her people's needs above her own. One who is beautiful, caring, and the kindest woman I've ever met. You draw me in every passing day, and even though the memories I have may not be true, I can't help but fall for you."

The admission of emotion was a relief to hear, and her words rekindled the fire in my chest. "Alessia, is this what you want?" My eyes wandered to her lips as I forced my body from meeting hers.

"More than anything else in this world." Her fingers dug into my back, bunching the fabric and searing the flesh underneath with the loving heat.

"Alessia, there will be no going back. What I'm afraid of most is if our relationship falls apart? I don't want to lose what we have now." I rested there, with my forehead against hers, staring into her eyes.

Her response was pressing her lips into mine, silencing whatever complaints I may have had. At that moment, all that mattered was the sparks that flitted in my heart and the heat that threatened to melt me. Her lips were cold, but the heat from mine melded them together perfectly enough. I pulled her into me as I sank into her embrace, and the last bit of reservations faded away into the back of my mind.

"Alessia, I'm not going to lie to you. I'm needy, obsessive, compulsive, and above all else, I'm greedy, and I don't like to share." I pulled away after what felt like an eternity to catch my breath.

"And I am all yours. Forever bound to be by your side." Without a second thought, she pulled me back into another earth-shattering kiss, and for once, I felt complete. I finally have a purpose. Perhaps this wasn't so bad after all

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