Why, Can't You Eat?

Chapter 28: 28


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Translator: Yonnee

────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────Chapter 28

“GAAAAHHH!”

As soon as I opened my eyes, I grabbed my head and fell forward. What the hell. What the hell’s going on…?!

I’ve lost rationality before, but I’ve never gone as hard as I did like last night. But why? I don’t even remember when my body changed.

It felt like I’d been robbed of my body because I always had to change my form to absorb essence on my own. My whole body trembled at the unknown phenomenon.

I lost my mind and said, ‘Please ram it into me,’ and I could only feel goosebumps running up my skin at that. I was too complacent. I already don’t know enough about being a succubus… but now I absolutely don’t know what the hell to do.

“…Hicc.”

I buried my face in my blanket and held back my tears. It was like a prelude to something.

I didn’t want to, but I suddenly turned into a succubus and went to Damian, even though I couldn’t remember properly and went to Odil yesterday.

I cried under the blanket for fear of someone else hearing my sobs. Then, when I woke up, I cried again, then I fell asleep again. I couldn’t even get out of bed until the next day.

·

“I think I say this too often these days… Are you really alright?”

“I want to say that I’m fine, but… To be honest, I’m really not fine today. If anyone’s looking for me, please say I’m not here.”

“…Mm.”

I just cried the whole day, so my face couldn’t have looked alright. When I looked at my reflection, I looked horrendous, so I made some ice and cooled my face before coming out, but the swelling didn’t go away. It would be strange to say I was still fine to Lucy, who was frowning as she looked at my red-rimmed eyes.

“What is it?”

“Ah, actually. There was someone looking for you yesterday.”

“Who? Commander Lucen? Commander Fenril?”

“No.”

Was it the guy I met the day before yesterday? But there’s no way he knows I work at the library… Seeing Lucy’s strangely excited expression, her lips twitching with a mischievous look, I was getting nervous for no reason.

“Who is it?”

I licked my dry lips out of nervousness and rubbed my hands, but then Lucy squinted and spoke.

“He’s over there.”

“But who is… it.”

“Our Lily, I’m so happy that you’re seeing more and more men these days. So, when did you get to know him? Huh?”

With a frown, I looked behind me. And I froze on the spot. The cold gaze from afar was persistently focused on me and Lucy. Silver hair that shone faintly anywhere he went and blue eyes that were so cold like ice. Even as I had hardened in place, Lucy greeted cheerfully over me.

“Commander Cygnus, good afternoon!”

Sir Odil walked closer to me, his strides wide as he did not take his eyes off me even once. Taking a few steps backward, I stood upright and I came to my senses because Lucy looked at me strangely.

Tilting her head for a moment, Lucy turned to Odil, who was still approaching us, and said with a chipper voice.

“What brings you here, Commander?”

“As I said yesterday, I have some business with this maid.”

“Lily?”

“Yes. I apologize, but it’s personal.”

“It’s alright, of course…”

No, no it’s not alright! Lucy didn’t even look at me once though she was by my side, so I glared at her fiercely. Even so, she had a cheerful voice, but judging by her expression, she also seemed to be uncomfortable.

Sighing quietly and raising his head slightly, Sir Odil had just an indifferent look in his eyes until now, then he glanced in my direction.

“Then, let me borrow her for a moment.”

“What? Oh, yes!”

“Follow me.”

Why was she so surprised? Lucy answered with her eyes wide open, unlike how she usually was. I made a tearful expression while looking back at Lucy, but I followed Sir Odil silently.

By the way, his butt… Is it okay?

Sir Odil’s steps were a little fast, but he sometimes stopped walking and turned halfway behind him, checking if I was still following him. This repeated several times. He would slow down his gait and go faster again once I got closer.

Without a single word exchanged between us, we arrived at the knight’s division. My hands were cold due to tension and anxiety.

“Excuse me, Commander. I heard that you, you have some business with me…”

Stopping in front of the main building, I spoke to Sir Odil. The words I uttered one by one were quivering terribly. I promised Damian that I’d tell Sir Odil once the ring was found, but it still wasn’t the right time.

He couldn’t hear me, but I apologized to Sir Damian in advance. If Sir Odil were to utter the ‘su’ in ‘succubus’, I’d immediately retreat into the shadows.

In the heavy silence, he turned around. I looked at his tightly shut lips and gulped.

“You.”

Me.

“…Ha.”

Sir Odil suddenly sighed, not continuing his words. Then, he looked at me and frowned, then he sighed again. After a long time, he spoke with a rough voice.

“I’m building a library on the third floor.”

Library? At the topic that came out of nowhere, I frowned. I couldn’t figure out what connection there was between building a library and me here. No, actually, I don’t want to have a connection anywhere with anyone.

Sir Odil continued to speak with an indifferent expression, his voice devoid of any hesitation.

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“It won’t be that large. About 300 books will be selected for educational purposes, and knight trainees will be in charge of cleaning. You can manage the books just as you’ve been doing so far, and you’ll be in charge of locking up the library.”

What do you mean, just as I’ve been doing so far? My lips trembled. No way, this can’t be. Whenever I’m flustered, my instinct to flee would rear its head, and right now my knees were flinching.

“Lilith Sera. The official notice will not be released until next month, but starting next week, you will be working here.”

“…Pardon?”

“……”

“W-Why?”

It felt like I was drained of all the blood in my body. My mind went blank and I couldn’t form a single thought. Even my mouth had dried up when I stuttered, and I couldn’t even afford to think about etiquette or insolence.

“How come, I…”

“From Damian.”

Because Sir Odil hadn’t said anything before, I let out a deep breath and tried to ask again. But even before I could ask the full question, he brought up Damian’s name. And the moment the name was called, his voice became laced with irritation.

“What do you mean by Commander Inferno?”

“Damian recommended you for the post.”

Neither I nor Sir Odil spoke in long sentences, so only the necessary words were being exchanged. Even so, this was enough for me to figure out the situation.

Damian, he recommended me? Me? To this place? Even though he knew that I was avoiding Sir Odil?

I continued to stand still, frozen, because this situation was so absurd. And Sir Odil glanced at me with a knowing look.

“…Damian said he’s explained it convincingly enough.”

“Not at all. I didn’t hear anything from him.”

“Then I’m sorry that it went ahead without your consent, but the application for your change in department has already been officially posted.”

I shook my head desperately as he was talking, but I soon dropped my head as he finished speaking. Officially posted, it’s official…? That meant that from next week onwards, I had no choice but to really move here?

This wasn’t a situation where Sir Odil had to apologize to me. There’s someone else who did something wrong. Biting my lower lip, I struggled to continue talking.

“It’s not something that you have to apologize for, Commander… I’ll ask Commander Inferno about it later.”

Damian, that horrible scoundrel. No, it’s not enough to say that he’s just terrible. How could he recommend me here when he knows that I’m avoiding Sir Odil? I don’t even know what Sir Odil’s ideal type looks like, but rather than my own appearance, I was now worried about my scent being familiar to him.

But he said it’s a library… What if Sir Odil would ask me questions while I was in that small place? Just thinking about that made me sweat. While sobbing inwardly, I imagined hitting Damian’s smug little face right in the middle. Then at that moment,

“Now that I think about it, all the other Commanders know you.”

“Huh? Ah, that’s… We happen to know each other.”

“Is that so.”

“Yes. It just became that way. …They sometimes come to the library and, uh, I ran into them.”

The moment he mentioned the other commanders, I kept stammering without realizing it. I knew I looked suspicious, but I couldn’t help it because it was a natural reaction.

While still cursing at Damian inwardly, I remembered that Maria told me to look at someone’s lips while talking to people in order to look as though I was maintaining eye contact.

It would be nice if he wouldn’t see my face at all, but it would put me in a difficult place if I kept avoiding his gaze while he stared at me, so I did as Maria said. It was definitely much better this way.

What I said to Sir Odil wasn’t technically a lie either. Sir Endymion was someone who often went to the library in the first place, and I also bumped into Regulus there while he was on his way somewhere else. When I spoke while thinking of only those two, my voice wasn’t as shaky as before.

Then, Sir Odil spoke.

“…We’ll get to know each other from now on. I believe we’ll keep seeing each other for a while, so can I call you comfortably?”

No.

“Yes, sir.”

Contrary to my inner thoughts, what came out was a calm tone. I imagined Damian crying, pleading, puking with a messed up face while rubbing his hands together while praying to the heavens. I clenched my hands into fists, vowing to make this happen.

Still… I’m glad. I was worried about the other day, but now that I saw him, standing there as though nothing had happened, that night felt like a dream.

But why did he have to bring me all the way here when you were just going to bring up something like this?

I asked carefully.

“Um, excuse me, Commander Cygnus. If you were just going to say that, why did you bring me all the way here?”

“……”

“…..?”

He looked at me with an unreadable expression. I was still just looking at Sir Odil’s lips.

A strange moment of silence ensued. Warmth had just settled again in this burdensome atmosphere, but I continued to knead my cold fingers again.

“…Directions.”

“Directions?”

“It’s to show you the way.”

“…The way? Oh, I see. Thank you very much.”

“You’re welcome. You can go now.”

“Yes.”

He coughed once after I responded. To give directions? Was he always this kind and attentive?

Hiding my embarrassed expression, I bowed down and headed back to the library. I’m usually sensitive to other people’s perception of me, but because of Endymion, I became even more sensitive to other people’s gazes.

The back of my head stung. To the point that it would be better if I was just imagining it, I could feel Sir Odil’s persistent gaze on me.

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