Chapter 6: 6

After getting off the high-speed train, Xu Yan saw a tall figure among the crowd at the station; it was Xu Nian, his brother who was one year younger than him. He graduated from high school to study abroad and is currently taking over the family company. On the high-speed train, Xu Yan sent a message to Xu Nian that he was coming back, Xu Nian coldly said: ‘What does it have to do with me? Didn’t you stop coming home, don't fantasize that I will come to pick you up…’ The younger brother’s mouth was stubborn but his body was honest, and he still came to pick up Xu Yan.

 

Upon meeting up,  Xu Yan did not speak. Xu Nian looked at him coldly, reached out and took the travel bag in his hand, turned his head, and left. Xu Yan followed with a smile and said, "Thank you, Director Xu, for picking me up, I’ll invite you to dinner tonight." Xu Nian ignored him and walked expressionlessly until the two got into the car, where Xu Nian sneered, "You brought so little, don’t tell me you came back just for dinner."

 

"No, I’m staying." Xu Yan said lightly, "Not leaving anymore." 

 

The hand that was fastening the seat belt stopped abruptly. Xu Nian raised his head, looked at Xu Yan's side face, and opened his mouth as if he wanted to ask something – but in the end, he couldn’t ask. He glanced over as he drove the car slowly, and said, "Oh.”

 

But little Director Xu's mood began to improve, and after a while, he took the initiative to find a word: "Do you want to go back to see our parents?"

 

"Not yet." Xu Yan said, "After a while, there is no hurry. Just take me back to the house I lived in high school.”

 

"No one has lived there for too long, so I have to contact the auntie to clean up." Xu Nian glanced at him, his tone unclear, "You are such a clean freak, let's go buy some daily necessities first."

 

Xu Yan smiled and nodded – In fact, Xu Nian has always been a clingy brat, but since Xu Yan fell out with his family two years ago, Xu Nian was very disappointed in him, so they had a somewhat awkward relationship.

 

At that time, Xu Nian knew that Xu Yan was with Shen Zhi, to be precise, he knew it more than a year ago – Xu Yan personally told him. After all, they are all young adults, and they are family. First talk to the little brother and get a ‘preventive vaccination’ to avoid turning the whole family upside down after coming out to the point there’s no support.

 

Xu Nian is an iron straight man because he was harassed by the same sex in high school and has been homophobic ever since. When he went abroad, the atmosphere became more open, so Xu Nian was harassed by more homosexuals – and the degree of homophobia deepened. Knowing that Xu Yan was in love with a boy, he exploded with anger and asked Xu Yan if he was crazy, whether he was sick, actually liked men, and wanted his ass to be played with by another man!

 

Xu Yan asked him at the time: "How do you know that I am the one who has my ass played with?!" – The question is so, but he is indeed the one who is played with his ass, and when he thinks of being played by Shen Zhi, Xu Yan is frank.

 

After buying some things and going home, Xu Yan walked slowly around the house for a long time. It's a little old, after all, it's a neighborhood where he lived in high school, but it was homey. Xu Nian didn't talk much from the mall to his home. He went to the kitchen to boil a pot of water and came out to stand in the living room for a long time, and eventually couldn't help but look at Xu Yan who walked out of the room and ask: "He threw you out?” How can anyone break up and only take such few things with him after they have lived together for two years? The only reason is that his brother was kicked out by Shen Zhi.

 

"Yea." Xu Yan replied casually.

 

"I’ll kill him!" Xu Nian suddenly raised his voice – sure enough, his brother was driven out by Shen Zhi, that bastard, fuck! Xu Nian clenched his fists, "I told you that he is not a good thing! You are dead good to him, and he still kicks you out!”

 

After he said that, he walked to the door, and his posture seemed like he wanted to kill Shen Zhi. Xu Yan hurriedly went over and grabbed him: "Joking and joking, I left by myself, he doesn’t know at all." Xu Nian didn't believe it and stared at him. Xu Yan raised his hand and swore, his tone sincere, "Really, I'm just too lazy to clean up, I have everything at home, you know?"

 

Xu Nian was even more suspicious: "What made you suddenly change your mind?"

 

"I don't know, maybe I'm tired." Xu Yan shrugged, smiled indifferently, and turned to go to the kitchen to pour water.

 

Xu Nian followed, stood by the door, looked at Xu Yan's back, and suddenly said very seriously, "I always thought he is not good, Brother, two years ago you quarreled with our parents. It was not coming out, you just had feelings for Shen Zhi. You didn't say you liked men at all, you only said that the person you like is Shen Zhi, and Shen Zhi is a man." 

 

The water was poured into the cup, and the steam was hot and went straight to Xu Yan's face, but he didn't say anything, so Xu Nian continued: "You said that you were with Shen Zhi, but he didn't face it with you. Falling in love is a matter of two people, but from beginning to end, only you are working hard."

 

"Xu Nian..." Xu Yan spoke in a low voice.

 

Xu Nian interrupted him: "Well, you said before that you didn't want Shen Zhi to be upset about these things, but if he truly loves you, he will not feel annoyed by this kind of thing, this is something that the two of you should bear together, you know?"

 

Two glasses of water were poured. Xu Yan placed his hands on the flow table, bowed his head, and was silent, then he turned around with a little smile on his face: "Why are you pondering my affairs so profoundly?"

 

"I'm just going to tell you." Xu Nian was as serious as a schoolboy, and spoke word by word, "Shen Zhi is not worth it."

 

"Whether it's worth it or not, I have the final say." Xu Yan looked at him, "But from now on, you don’t need to bring up our matters."

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Xu Nian looked him up and down, and finally nodded: "Brother, I believe you for the time being, I hope you don't let me down."

 

"No, I'm not responsible for your expectations, I'm only responsible for my own decisions." Xu Yan said.

 

"..." Xu Nian endured for a while, then retreated, "That's okay!" 

 

It was a weekday, so Xu Nian returned to the company, not staying too long. Xu Yan unpacked his things and took a shower, then went to sleep. When he woke up in the evening, it was dusk. Xu Yan opened his mobile phone and replied to a few messages, then finally looked at Shen Zhi's chat box at the top and said to himself: "I almost forgot." — and then canceled Shen Zhi at the top.

 

He didn't disturb Shen Zhi for the whole day today, and Xu Yan was happy for him – he finally got rid of himself.

 

Xu Nian sent him a message on WeChat: Brother, I'm off work, come out and eat! Drink and have fun!

 

"Dumbass." Xu Yan scolded with a smile.

 

After nine o'clock, Shen Zhi returned home. From the outside, there was no light in the whole house – this is not very common. Xu Yan works less overtime, generally goes home after work, and if he occasionally goes out with friends, he will tell Shen Zhi beforehand, but throughout the whole day, Xu Yan has not sent him any news and has not even asked whether he will go home to eat like he does every day.

 

Entering the door and turning on the light, Shen Zhi took a bottle of yogurt from the refrigerator and drank it in the living room, and after drinking, there was still no movement upstairs. Xu Yan sleeps very lightly; sometimes Shen Zhi returns late, and as long as the car is parked at the door, he can hear even if he is asleep, that puppy-like spirit, and then he will immediately turn on the light and go downstairs, saying to Shen Zhi "You are back". It's nonsense, but Xu Yan laughs every time he says it, even if he is sleepy.

 

He never seemed to get tired or tired, as if as long as he could look at Shen Zhi more, he would be very satisfied.

 

The garbage bag was newly replaced and it was empty, Shen Zhi threw the yogurt box in, went upstairs, and pushed open the door – Xu Yan was not there. The quilt was laid nicely as usual, the curtains were half-drawn, and the surroundings were quiet. Shen Zhi frowned slightly, took out his mobile phone, and sent Xu Yan WeChat: Where are you?

 

He quickly turned off his phone again and took his pajamas to the bathroom. More than half an hour later, Shen Zhi came out and wiped his hair while picking up his mobile phone. There were many messages, but none of them came from Xu Yan. Shen Zhi threw the towel aside, poured a glass of water to drink, and after a few sips, he glanced at the mobile phone on the quilt – there was no movement.

 

Shen Zhi held the water cup and stood in front of the table for a while, then returned to the bed, opened the mobile phone address book, found Xu Yan's name, and dialed the phone. One second, ten seconds, twenty seconds, no one answered; this situation is no longer in the category of Xu Yan's uncomfortable heart who returned late but did not report to himself, it may be a safety problem. Shen Zhi planned to arrange for someone to contact Xu Yan's friend, but at the moment when he was about to press the hang-up button, the call was answered.

 

It was noisy on the other side, the sound of music and cheers was heaven-shaking, and he could guess where it was. Shen Zhi wrinkled his eyebrows, his chest heaved for a while, and he asked coldly: "Are you at the bar?"

 

He was answered by an unfamiliar male voice, with a bad tone and arrogance: "What does it matter to you?!"

 

"What about Xu Yan?" Shen Zhi's brows tightened, "Let him answer the phone."

 

Before the man could speak, Shen Zhi heard Xu Yan's voice, obviously drunk, say a little vaguely: "Stop causing trouble... Give me the phone.” After a commotion, Xu Yan asked, "Hello?

 

"Having fun outside, huh?" Shen Zhi asked in a deep voice.

 

Xu Yan blinked his eyes a little in a trance, this tone was too familiar to him... Questioning, cold, unemotional, like a superior admonishing a subordinate, but even more unpolite than that. Xu  Yan laughed inexplicably and said, "Yes, how can you not have fun?"

 

Shen Zhi placed the water cup on the table expressionlessly – he used a little force, and the remaining half cup of water in it shook violently, splashing a few drops. He said, "You don't have to come back tonight." Yesterday you drank with my colleagues, today you drank with messy people, where can you get so much alcohol to drink?

 

"I'm not coming back..." Xu Yan's voice was a little low, his eyes looked vainly at the noisy dance floor below, and slowly, word by word, he said, "I'm not coming back."

 

"Come talk to me when you wake up tomorrow." After Shen Zhi said this, he hung up the phone, threw the phone on the bed, picked up a towel, and went into the bathroom to dry his hair.

 

He can imagine what Xu Yan will be like when he goes home tomorrow – the hippie smile as he says “I was wrong, I won’t do it next time”, and then he comes over and puts his arm around him, asking “what do you want to eat, I'll make it for you, don't be angry”... It's just some commonly used tricks to admit mistakes, never in a positive way; always having the ability to make people angry.

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