Chapter 204: This Trial Is Too Hard For Me

Xia Sha's eyelashes trembles as she stares into Guan Xian's dark brown eyes. Something deep inside her stomach muscle flexed and created a weird feeling. 

"What did I do?" she replied with her usual defensive mechanism. 

Guan Xian chews his food throughout before he speaks. His iris dilated as he faintly raised the corner of his lips, "I don't know, why don't you tell me?" 

Xia Sha squinted her eyes upon hearing his confusing answer. She recalled her days and didn't remember doing something that might make Guan Xian angry. She spends her days working on Pang Ze Tian-

"You had someone following me?" Xia Sha said coldly as soon as she realized the reason behind Guan Xian's weird behavior. 

Guan Xian raised his eyebrow in reflected movement. He put his eating utensil carefully and lean back to the chair. Without averting his burning gaze from Xia Sha, he answers her question directly. 

"Yes, I did. Not because I want to, because I have to." 

"Oh, Wow. That is the most basic excuse you could've used. Mind to tell me why? I don't know danger is lurking, so I need some bodyguard keeping tabs on my every movement," Xia Sha could hear herself intakes a sharp breath as soon as she finished her sentence with a smile. 

"After what happened to Xiao Ni? The danger is everywhere. We could not predict what will happen in the future. Don't you think I could forgive myself if something happens to you?" 

There are no smiles or laughter on Guan Xian's face. Xia Sha finds herself swallowing her saliva nervously after she heard his reason. But still- "You could notice me first? How do you think I would feel if found out like this?" 

"Why? So I could not catch you playing Bonnie and Clyde with another guy?" Guan Xian said in a monotonous tone, piercing Xia Sha's heart with needles with every word he said. 

"You said you would trust me," Xia Sha pressed her lips into a thin line as she glances coldly at Guan Xian. 

"I do. I would have made that man stayed in prison if I did not trust you. What about you? Do you trust me enough?" Guan Xian could turn the question back to Xia Sha without effort, making her shudder in silence. 

Guan Xian has been lenient to Xia Sha the whole time. Xia Sha almost forgets what he hides behind those warm smiles and friendly personalities. Because he loves her, he dotes on her. Because he has always been gentle to her, Xia Sha went complacent and forgotten his other sides. 

Does she trust him enough?

She does. 

But what makes her could not tell everything to him? She could explain everything to Ruan Jing Tian without any trouble, but when it comes to Guan Xian, she suddenly could not open her mouth. 

Does she not trust him enough?

Xia Sha's silence stirred something inside Guan Xian's heart. He lowered his gaze and look at his reflection through the ceramic plate. 

He isn't there yet. He hasn't gained Xia Sha's trust. But that man, Ruan Jing Tian, had it. 

Those simple realization could make a 187-centimeter height man felt as if someone had beat him up completely. There is nothing he wanted to do right now but run as far as he could. He wished to find that man or destroy something to vent his anger. 

But he could not do that. Not when those confused eyes stare at him intensely. Instead of doing what he wanted, Guan Xian finds himself smiling gently at her and reach for her hands. He heard himself mumbling something to Xia Sha. 

"It's okay. I will work harder. I will get there one day, I promise you."

He did not understand himself. How could Xia Sha manipulate him like this? He was angry at her. Damn! He wanted to go berserk if he could. However, what comes from his mouth is everything that contradicts his heart. 

Is he a loser? Or what? That even in the most frustrating states, he could not bring himself to blame her. 

"It's not like that," Xia Sha softened because of Guan Xian's thoughtful answer. Her delicate fingertips tightened around Guan Xian's hand as she walked to his side of the table. Guan Xian welcomes her warmly, pulling her stomach into his face direction as he waits for her continuation. 

"I don't want to add your burden. You had done enough for me. Instead, you've done too much that I don't want to burden you anymore. We are supposed to be a pair that could help each other. I don't want to keep relying on you," Xia Sha said something that she hasn't realized before. But when she faced Guan Xian's disappointment, the insecurities inside her suddenly break free. 

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"You can rely on me, always. I want you to," Guan Xian replies melted Xia Sha's heart. How could he go from fierce to adorable so fast?

"I know, but I want to be your helpmeet. I wanted to be suited, worthy, corresponding, and on par with you. That is unachievable if I keep running for your help for every little thing," Xia Sha almost choked as she explains passionately. 

"But it's not a small matter. Do you know that you could have endangered yourself?"

"That's why I come with Ruan Jing Tian-" Xia Sha mutters under her breath as she smiles at Guan Xian. Guan Xian's smiles fell. He looked flatly at Xia Sha and pushed her away. 

"Go, Go to that man that you trust so much. I don't even know why did you reject him and choose to be with me," Guan Xian went back with his monotonous tone. 

Xia Sha let out a laugh from her heart. One that makes Guan Xian laughed along with her. 

She steps closer to Guan Xian and mischievously sat on his lap. Guan Xian raised both of his eyebrows. He began to look at Xia Sha with a wary expression. 

"What are you doing right now? Are you planning to make me forget your betrayal with your beauty?" Guan Xian squinted his eyes and pinched Xia Sha's chin. 

Xia Sha clenched her teeth to hold her laughter. She extended her arm and put it around Guan Xian's neck. Moving slowly, Xia Sha watched Guan Xian's adam apple rolling up and down slowly. Her inner goddess quietly cheers as she got a boost of confidence. 

"That is the plan, but will it work?" she whispers with a hoarse voice. 

"It depends on how much sincerity you show," Guan Xian's replied quietly. 

"Well then, I wonder," Xia Sha stopped talking as her hand travels slowly to Guan Xian's hard chest. A thrilling sensation spread from her touch as she stoped on his racing heart. She bites the bottom of her lips and smiles at Guan Xian. 

Xia Sha watched Guan Xian's eyes turned shades darker as if it's an entertaining show for her. She found it amusing how fast Guan Xian's heartbeats as he suddenly counts. 

"One, Two, Three, Four, Five-"

"Why are you counting?" Xia Sha looks confused but also enjoying teasing Guan Xian. 

"I've counted to ten. I gave you times to run away from me. Don't blame me for what happens next," Guan Xian said in one breath and crushed his lips against Xia Sha the next second. 

Xia Sha was surprised by his sudden attack. She tried to push him away, but his hold on her waist tightened. Guan Xian kissed Xia Sha's delicate lips in rather a rough way. Xia Sha could felt her lips become swollen and tingling. 

He dominated Xia Sha for a long time until she panted breathlessly. She felt him frowning when they stop in the middle of the kiss. She looks at him with a misty gaze, probing a question as she catches her breath. 

"Why?"

"Damn it. This trial is too hard for me," Guan Xian mumbles something that Xia Sha could not understand. 

What trial? What is too hard? 

"What do you mean?" Xia Sha whispered back to him with a short breath. 

"You, I mean you, you are the hardest trial I've ever had in my life," Guan Xian mutters as he began to attacked Xia Sha with his soft kisses again. 

Xia Sha still could not fathom what Guan Xian's said, but before she could think further, Guan Xian overlaps her lips over and over again until her mind went blank. As if he got addicted to the lips, he licked it gently before he stops himself. 

"Xia Sha, let's get marry sooner, shall we?" Guan Xian mutters under his breath as he looked at Xia Sha deeply. 

Xia Sha got drowned by his passionate gaze. She did not remember what did she said, but she remembers nodding her head while watching Guan Xian's lips growing wider.. The next thing she knew, she woke up in her bed with Guan Xian beside her.

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