After the Stand-in Shou Faked His Death

Chapter 32: 32


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Ch32 - Living with Pain

QiQi insisted on waiting for the other person to get off.

But it waited by the door for a long, long time, and still, the person it was waiting for didn’t appear. It was a little puzzled. 

QiQi got up and circled around the car, calling out to the car from time to time, but still no one paid attention to it.

He Yang retracted his gaze and turned back to the villa.

 

 

He Yang came to the recuperation room and saw a middle-aged man in a wheelchair.

The middle-aged man had some trace of vicissitudes on his face, sitting alone by the window, looking out of the house. 

The middle-aged man heard the footsteps, looked back, and whispered, “Where’s A Ruan?”

 

“The weather is fine today. Maybe A Ruan will go out to take pictures……” The middle-aged man was still immersed in his memories, and said, “A Ruan said that you refused to smile every time she took a picture, and you still ——”

He Yang interrupted: “She is dead.”

“Dead?” The middle-aged man was stunned, and after a long time, he came to his senses and murmured: “Yes, A Ruan has been gone for seven years…….”

 

“After she left, you don’t like taking picture anymore……”

The memories in the middle-aged man’s mind were still a little chaotic. After he sorted out the memories, he asked again, “What about the child you brought back last time?”

“He didn’t come with you?”

 

He Yang came over, stood beside the wheelchair, looked out the window, and replied, “He died in a car accident.” 

“He is dead too?” The middle-aged man was surprised, “All dead……”

***

When He Yang came out of the recuperation room, he met the old Steward in the corridor.

The old Steward came over and asked, “Young Master He, do you want to hold a funeral for Mr. Xu?” 

The Steward had just called Jiang Lin to confirm the news that Xu ChengYan had died, and Mr. Xu hadn’t held a funeral yet.

And Mr. Xu was the first person Young Master He brought back to the main house. Although he was already dead, they still had to do some things that should be done.

“Mr. Xu has no parents. If Young Master He wants to, he can be buried at the He family’s side.”

But when the man heard it, he just said coldly: “He’s already dead.” 

“Don’t mention him.” He Yang’s voice was very indifferent.

The Steward hesitated, but nodded obediently and stopped talking about Mr. Xu.

 

He Yang turned back to the bedroom, sat alone on the balcony, and took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket.

There were a lot of potted plants on the balcony, all of which were brought back by Xu ChengYan and the Steward. 

He didn’t know what species they were, but there were a few potted plants with white flowers and a strong fragrance.

He Yang squinted and looked at the garden in the yard, a little distracted.

The smoke tangled in the fingertips, and the cigarette butts burned shorter and shorter.

He Yang didn’t react until the cigarette butt burned his fingers and put it out in the ashtray. 

Then, he lit another cigarette again.

He Yang was on the balcony, watching the sky outside darken little by little until it was pitch black outside.

The ashtray was full of cigarette butts. He Yang was half leaning on the recliner with his eyes closed, as if he had fallen asleep.

Until light footsteps came from the corridor, breaking the calm. 

QiQi wandered outside slowly, with a Frisbee in his mouth, and moved closer to the bedroom.

The door was not closed tightly. QiQi pushed the door open with his head and squeezed in.

No lights were turned on in the bedroom. It was pitch black, except for a little light on the balcony.

QiQi walked around in the bedroom, but couldn’t find the person he wanted. So, he had to get to the balcony, come to the man’s side, lower his head, and put the Frisbee on the ground. 

“Woof!” QiQi pushed the man’s leg with his head, wanting that person to play with him.

He Yang said indifferently, “Go find someone else.”

“Woof!” Qi Qi shook his tail, as if he understood, then he turned around and ran out.

But not long after, QiQi came in with another toy in his mouth. 

This time, QiQi was holding a colorful hairball. QiQi put the hairball at the man’s feet, and pushed the man’s drooping hand with his hairy head.

He Yang withdrew his hand and ignored the big dog.

 

And QiQi was very energetic. Even if the man ignored him, he still kept harassing the man, running in and out of the room, carrying a lot of toys in.

The pet toys were piled up all over the place, He Yang looked down and glanced —— 

Those were all the toys that Xu ChengYan bought.

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

However, the toys looked tattered, and several of the dolls had been bitten, revealing the cotton wool inside.

HlHl ilxfv We JtfcuTjc nfgs wemt, jcv fnfc ilxfv atf atlcur atja We JtfcuTjc ygbeuta yjmx klat tlw nfgs wemt, ylalcu jcv qijslcu (klat atbrf absr) ja klii.

Vbwfalwfr atf abs We JtfcuTjc ygbeuta yjmx atf olgra vjs kjr ylaafc jcv abgc ys HlHl ktfc tf kfca ab rff la jujlc atf cfza wbgclcu, rb tf tjv ab yes j cfk bcf obg HlHl. 

In the end, QiQi had already saved up quite a few toys bought by Xu ChengYan, and none of them were intact.

He Yang picked up a teddy bear doll from the ground and saw that one of the doll’s eyes had been bitten off by the big dog.

“Woof!” QiQi called out to He Yang and ran out again.

In the corridor, the Steward noticed the movement on QiQi’s side, so he came over. 

The Steward turned on the lights in the corridor, stood outside the bedroom door. He noticed the figure on the balcony of the room, and called out, “Young Master He.”

He Yang looked over and said: “Clean the balcony tomorrow. Throw away all the garbage.”

“Okay.” The Steward nodded, came to the balcony and looked at the ground, only to realize that the “garbage” He Yang said was referring to QiQi’s toys.

The Steward also recognized that these toys were bought by Xu ChengYan, and said, “This should be what Mr. Xu——” 

He Yang: “Don’t mention the dead.”

The Steward fell silent and stopped talking.

“Throw away all the garbage.”

The Steward euphemistically said: “But QiQi likes it…….” 

He Yang looked at the pile of tattered toys on the ground. He withdrew his gaze carelessly, and said casually, “Then, buy new ones again.”

The Steward had no choice but complied with it first.

 

It’s just that before leaving, the Steward stopped at the door of the room, turned around, and asked: “Young Master He, are you…….. alright today?”

“M-hm.” He Yang’s voice was still the same as usual. 

The Steward didn’t say anything more. He just closed the door, turned around and went downstairs.

When going downstairs, the Steward suddenly remembered that when Mrs. He died seven years ago, Young Master was as indifferent as he was now, even a little cold and detached ——

As if the dead person was just a stranger.

At that time, because of the sudden death of his wife, Master He was hospitalized with excessive sadness, and everyone was busy taking care of Master He. 

Young master was the only one left in the main house, flipping through the albums left by Mrs. He over and over again.

Then, he threw away all the cameras in the house.

***

He Yang stayed in the main house for one night and returned to the apartment the next day. 

It started to rain again outside. He Yang listened to the sound of rain, went back to the bedroom, and fell asleep.

When he was half asleep, He Yang was disturbed by the noise from the living room and woke up.

The movement in the living room was very light, like someone was tidying up things in the dining room, and there was the sound of the refrigerator being opened.

He Yang got up, walked to the corridor, and called out, “Yanyan?” 

The apartment was quiet, and no one answered.

However, the noise in the dining room continued. He Yang walked over and saw the housekeeper aunt.

The housekeeper aunt was sorting out the food she bought. When she saw He Yang coming over, she quickly stopped the movement on her hands, wiped her hands with a towel, and asked, “Mr. He, did I disturb you? I’m sorry……”

He Yang didn’t answer, just looked at the food on the table and frowned slightly. 

“I bought the vegetables and put them in the refrigerator.” The housekeeper aunt looked at the man’s face and said cautiously, “But I see that the vegetables I bought last week have not been moved. Is it because Mr. Xu doesn’t like it, or the taste has changed?”

Usually, Xu ChengYan takes care of everything at home. So, the aunt goes directly to Xu ChengYan for anything.

 

It’s just that she sent a message to Xu ChengYan recently, but the other party never responded, and she couldn’t get through to him.

The aunt had to say: “I couldn’t get through to Mr. Xu. I also don’t want to disturb you……” 

He Yang just said lightly: “Ask me directly next time if you have anything.”

The aunt asked tentatively, “Then Mr. Xu’s side?”

“Xu ChengYan is dead, don’t look for him.” He Yang’s tone was a little impatient.

There were always people who wanted to mention Xu ChengYan in front of him. 

He also had to repeat it to others over and over again ——

Xu ChengYan was dead.

He Yang: “Don’t mention him in the future.”

The housekeeper aunt was stunned for a moment, then nodded: “Okay……” 

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The aunt turned around and was about to continue cleaning up the food when she suddenly thought of something. She hurriedly asked: “Mr. He, do you want to pack up the things in the apartment?”

Generally speaking, when someone in the family dies, all the things of the dead person will be cleaned up, and not all of them will be left at home.

After He Yang heard this, he looked at that one suitcase in the corner of the living room.

That suitcase belonged to Xu ChengYan, and he never opened it after he brought it back from Anshi. 

He Yang: “Throw away the suitcase.”

The aunt nodded. She walked over to open the suitcase, and prepared to organize the contents in the suitcase first.

There were a lot of small things in the suitcase. The aunt raised her head and asked, “Mr. He, are you throwing all these things away?”

He Yang looked over and saw the stamps put in the suitcase at first glance, and there was a small wooden tag in the corner. 

He Yang walked over step by step. He leaned over, and took out the wooden tag.

The wooden tag was still cold to the touch. He Yang rubbed the handwriting on the tag and said slowly, “Throw it away.”

 

***

Psychological clinic. In the office. 

Jiang Lin sat opposite the psychologist with red eyes.

“He sent me a message that morning…….” Jiang Lin’s voice was a little choked up, “He said that the stockade village was too far, so he might not be able to come back at night. So, he wanted to change to another place……..”

“If I could persuade him at that time, he won’t go to the stockade village, and then, he won’t have a car accident……”

“It’s my fault…… I killed two people…….” 

The psychologist listened quietly. He handed over the tissue, and comforted: “Mr. Jiang, it’s not your fault.”

The doctor was a very young man with a gentle voice, wearing glasses and a white coat, which made people feel reassured.

But Jiang Lin’s emotions were not calmed down, and his voice was hoarse: “It’s almost…… just a little……and I’ll be able to save them……..”

In fact, on the morning of April Fool’s Day, Sister-in-law was a little hesitant. 

Sister-in-law told him that the stockade village was too far away, and he was afraid that he would not be able to come back at night. It happened that the tour guide also recommended another place, so he thought about whether to change the place.

But when he heard it, he did not persuade him.

In the end, Sister-in-law went to the stockade village as he originally planned, and never came back.

“I can dream of him every night…… I dream of the day he had a car accident…….” Jiang Lin lowered his head, hugged his head, and he somewhat had a breakdown. 

Every night, he dreamt of the deformed van.

Xu ChengYan was covered in blood, and stretched out his hand to him, asking for help.

He ran frantically, trying to save his Sister-in-law from inside. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t touch the people in the van. It was just a little bit (before he could reach them) every time.

It was as if some invisible force separated him from his Sister-in-law, and he could never save anyone. 

Even in his dream, he couldn’t save them.

“I’m so sorry…….” Jiang Lin burst into tears.

 

He killed two people.

“Mr. Jiang.” The doctor was very patient and said slowly: “I don’t know how to say comforting words. Those hypocritical words are actually useless.” 

“There is never someone understanding your feeling as if they had experienced it on their own and time can’t solve everything.”

The doctor was cruel, tearing open the wound cruelly, “The only thing you can do is to accept the reality.”

“I can’t accept it……” Jiang Lin kept shaking his head, “I can’t accept it……..”

He was very sad, very painful…… 

They had known each other for five years, and Sister-in-law was like an elder brother to him ——

But he killed his brother.

He wanted to go back to the past. Go back to April Fool’s Day, and tell Sister-in-law not to go to the stockade village.

He also hoped that there were ghosts, and that his sister-in-law could appear in front of him. 

But reality is reality, cold and ruthless.

There are no time machines and no ghosts in reality.

“I don’t accept…….” Jiang Lin was unable to speak, and his body twitched.

He had kept some words in his heart for a long time, but he couldn’t tell the people around him. 

Everyone didn’t care about Xu ChengYan’s death, not even He Yang.

Sometimes, he wondered if only he could see Xu ChengYan, and no one else could.

Otherwise, Xu ChengYan’s dead and why was he the only one who was so sad?

“I’m really……. so sad……” Jiang Lin cried so intermittently. 

He was obviously a big boy in his twenties, but now he was crying like a child, and his emotions were out of control.

The doctor pushed his glasses and said gently, “Mr. Jiang, the pain can’t go away.”

 

“What’s happened can’t be changed, we can only try to get used to the pain ——”

“Live with the pain.” 

***

Coming out of the psychological clinic, Jiang Lin’s eyes were still a little red and swollen, and one could see the traces of crying.

But now his mood had calmed down a lot, and pouring out his heart was a good way to relieve him.

Although he was still in pain, he had to live well. 

Jiang Lin got into the car and drove towards the apartment.

After the car stopped, Jiang Lin got out of the car and went to He Yang’s house first.

Jiang Lin went to ring the doorbell. It was the housekeeper aunt who came to open the door.

Jiang Lin asked, “Where is my brother?” 

The aunt: “Mr. He is on the balcony.”

Jiang Lin walked towards the balcony and saw the man sitting lazily on the recliner. The ashtray on the table next to him was full of cigarette butts.

Jiang Lin said, “I came to get my things.”

He Yang didn’t look back. He looked out the window, and said casually, “What things?” 

“My stamps.” Jiang Lin walked in and said: “Sister-in-law bought me stamps when he was in Anshi.”

Jiang Lin: “I know you brought back his suitcase. Give me the stamps.”

He Yang said unhurriedly: “The suitcase was thrown away.”

“Throw it away?!” Jiang Lin rushed up and held the man’s shoulder tightly, and said anxiously with red eyes: “It was his thing. Why did you throw it away?” 

“He is dead.” He Yang frowned and removed the hand on his shoulder, “It’s pointless to keep his things.”

“He Yang!” Jiang Lin couldn’t believe it, and he asked, “So, you are not going to be sad?! He’s all dead!”

 

He Yang still had that calm look on his face, and said coldly, “If he is dead, then he is dead.”

He knew that Xu ChengYan was dead. He didn’t need to emphasize it again. 

He was already dead.

***

Jiang Lin was so angry that he slammed the door and left.

He Yang continued to lean on the recliner and looked at the sky in the distance. 

Hearing the quarrel just now, the housekeeper didn’t dare to speak any more, and left after tidying up the house.

He Yang was the only one left in the apartment.

The surroundings were quiet except for the sound of rain and wind outside the window.

He Yang listened to the sound of the rain outside, and habitually reached into his pocket, wanting to touch the cigarette. 

But in his pocket, besides the cigarette, He Yang also touched another thing ——

A small, cold rectangular thing.

He Yang took out that rectangular object. He looked at the familiar handwriting on the wooden tag, and gently rubbed his palm against it.

【May XianSheng be safe year after year.】 

He Yang held the wooden tag. He squinted and felt a little sleepy.

The sound of the rain outside the window became less and less, and his consciousness began to drift.

In a trance, He Yang seemed to hear a gentle male voice behind him ——

“XianSheng.” 

That male voice was still the same as before, as if the owner of the voice had just gone out for a short time and had now returned.

He Yang woke up, and the wooden tag in his palm fell to the ground in an instant, making a crisp sound.

 

But when He Yang looked back, there was nothing behind him.

The apartment was still empty. 

There was only him.

XXXXX

T/N: Hello, everyone! This is MiokiMidori.

I’m really sorry about the long absence last month. I’ve some health problems last month and I needed to rest. I was not in the state to translate any new chapter or inform you about the situation. Thankfully, I’m finally getting better. Still, I’m sorry for not informing about my absence. Well, that’s just some unnecessary explanation. Here’s today’s update. I hope you “like” it (don’t curse He Yang much!) and I’ll try to make up for the last month’s update later. 

So, that’s it. Please take care of yourself. Health is the most important in life!!!

Take care and Have a nice day!

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