Chapter 6: Chapter 4: Thanksgiving in August

Day 2 - Afternoon - August

New Amster City - Carlton Heights

"Louie!"

The voluptuous twenty-something sorceress drops her staff and leaps at me. She’s wearing a dark, bare shoulder, curve hugging dress with a long double split skirt, thigh high boots and a witch hat. You might think she looted a Halloween store. But Louis helped get every enchanted piece through dungeon raids.

"Oomph!"

Impact. Ce's long olive skinned arms wrap around me. Giant, paizuri loving, F-cups squash against my chest. A sobbing french face hides under my chin. The hat goes flying. Exposing curly dark brown hair. Through cries and hiccups I hear.

"You never *hic* back. Everyone said *hic* were dead. How could *hic* live *hic* you?"

*wail* *mwah* *chu*

I hold the Minutemen's nuker tight, kissing her forehead and comforting the bawling girl. Really didn't expect this. Louis was a virgin. So while his D grade stats gave him stamina even pornstars could only dream of. My, his, first time was a total grudge fuck. No technique. Or skill.

Basically hours of wham bam, thank you ma'am. The seductress came, like, twice. If that. He honestly wasn't paying attention. Ce was acting happy and satisfied at the time but I figured she was faking. Could tell she had a crush. But didn't think it was serious.

That night may have meant more to her than I thought. A lot more.

"Hey, hey. Shhh. It's okay. How could I ever leave you." Squeeze and tease. "Now, is that a submachine gun in your pocket or are you happy to see me? Oh, that is a submachine gun in your pocket."

Sniffles turn into giggles and she thumps my chest. But there's no strength behind it. Green eyes gaze up then freeze. Locking on to my new peepers.

"What happened to your eyes?"

I frown.

"Goblins."

"Huh? How?"

Sexy firestarter is confused and I understand why. As a Bronze ranker, most goblins should have been zero threat to me. But there is no way I'm telling them the complete truth.

“I was poisoned.”

“That bitch!”

Yeah, don't need Scooby Doo to figure out who did it. And our night of clumsy passion gave Louis the chance to unload emotionally as well as sexually. The heartbroken kid told her everything. His whole damn life story. Including Johnny's, "rub it in his face," incident.

"I was…" Sad regretful face. "Too late to save mom and sis."

Ce stares intently at me and grabs my arms. Causing her to pause again. Noticing my right limb feels strange. Then sees the hand that is no longer flesh and bone, but now plastic and metal. Through grinding teeth she swears.

“I will kill her.”

Rap knuckles against my left leg. Which makes a distinctly not fleshly sound.

“They got this too.”

Wizardess trembles with rage. So I try to calm things, a bit, by changing the subject.

"Why are you guys here?"

Max answers. He's still cosplaying as that Minuteman from Fallout. Bent cowboy hat, tan trench coat, long blue vest, denim jeans and shin high boots. Actually being african too? Might as well call Bethesda and tell them the part for the Netflix adaptation is already covered. Though he also wears a chainmail hauberk under the coat and vest.

"Ahem. Mister the king. The Fort Matthews council has issued a quest to find you." Glances around the large basement furnished like its a set in a Victorian era drama, or an exhibit from a museum. "There are, uh, rumors that you're dead. The sheriff suspects you were murdered. And the mayor asked us to bring back your, uh, assets."

Sorceress gives me another big hug and rubs her face against me.

"I remembered you saying you used to live in Carlton Heights." Is she sniffing me? "So we decided to come here first." Hesitates. "When you didn't come back… I thought… maybe…"

Give her a big bear hug.

"Of course not. Trust me. Anything I felt for her is gone." Growl. "Long gone. No, Cynthia was waiting at my shop and said mom and sis were here. Looking for old photos." Sigh. "Knew it was a trap. But did not expect to be poisoned."

Wraps her arms around my neck and tiptoes to kiss me. Showing a holy shit ton of cleavage. 

“Don't worry," pauses, "dear." Sprouts a big ol smile when I let it pass. "We’ll go back and burn those vermin out of their holes." The grin turns vicious. "No one messes with my man."

Look down at my woman sweetly.

"Thank you, love." Ce's eyes sparkle. "But things have changed. I’m not ready to go back yet."

Her straight nose scrunches cutely.

"Why?”

"I’ll tell you, soon. But shouldn't we eat first? You guys must be hungry."

And they must. Even with the soup kitchen there are thousands of mouths to feed. Everything on the system store is pricey and monster meat, until I bought the butcher, was questionable. Some had proven to be poisonous.

So to save chits, pretty much everyone was rationing themselves. Eating cheap and light.

My temptress nods as Max awkwardly raises a hand.

"Mister the king?" Maxwell always believed in being respectful. Especially to those who could kick his ass. "What the hell is going on?"

"I'll explain after dinn-oh?"

The Velvet Fog comes up on the cd player.

♫The christmas feeling~. That time when we~ will once again~, sing all the carols while we trim the tree~…♫

Shit, should have gotten a tree. If I can do Thanksgiving in August? Why not Christmas too?

Pull Cecilia, her real name, in closer and start slowly swinging to the music. We dance intimately on the rug in front of the fire. You'd expect it to be hot but the cooler temp in this concrete entombed basement balances it out.

Ushered in by the cat maid again, the other four finally enter the lounge. Looking very uncomfortable and out of place. Glancing repeatedly at the food covered dining table and bygone era furniture.

Vincent, though, is focused only on Ce. He's a big scandinavian and a little slow. We'll suited to the Guardian class. Plus being the Minutemen's tank. Has a denim jacket, jeans and steel toed work boots on. Not easy to tell though under all that plate, chain, and football padding. Even wears a modified football helmet.

Know Ce and he dated a bit before the world went to hell but stayed friends. According to Max, Vin's tried to restart things since but she isn't interested. Right now it's clear that the tank is a lot more interested in my girl than I thought.

Finally, he can't stop himself anymore. 

“Um. Uh. Ce? You shouldn’t do that.” She ignores him. “That… might not be the king.”

She snorts, still only having eyes for me.

“Ha! And who do you think he is?”

Vin fidgets and stutters.

“Uh. Um. A monster.”

*record scratch*

Cecilia wheels on the guardian with a fire in her eyes.

“What?!”

The tank flinches back from her aggro. But Po comes to his rescue.

“He’s not wrong.” Sweeps his hand across the room and shakes his head. “This is beautiful. It truly is. But it's also impossible.”

Po, short for Pedro, is the Cleric. An overweight hispanic catholic who serves as the party's medic, offtank and voice of reason. He's in his thirties and an actual priest. Even wears vestments like a white and gold chasuble. However, it's under plate armor and football pads too.

Both Vin and Max grip their weapons.

Nina smirks and meows, "nyah," before walking through a swinging door into the kitchen. Suggestively swaying her hips and tail. Deflating the tense atmosphere. Well, mostly.

The killing intent isn't gone. It's just switched. From Vin, Max and Po… to Ce. Who asks way too calmly.

"Louie? What is that?"

Yeah, what boyfriend hasn't had trouble introducing his girlfriend to his sexbot. Am I right or am I right?

…

Guys?

…

Huh.

"She is Nina. And if you want to know who she is? You should ask her yourself."

*munch* *crunch*

A sorceress squint is interrupted by someone loudly chewing. Everyone turns to see Alessandra, the assassin and Po's younger sister, sitting at the couch. Grazing at the snack tray on the coffee table. She notices us watching.

"What?" Holds up a cube of ham. "It's fucking good. And fresh." Dips another celery stick in a cup filled with melted cheese. "Is this queso?"

Lez, called as much for her frequently stated sexual orientation as her name, is the group's scout. Her assassin class focuses on stealth and high damage surprise attacks. She's a short hispanic dressed like some unholy union of ninja and bondage queen.

Lots of black leather and straps. Holsters and sheaths. Like if catwoman chose to go "tactical." Only thing missing is the whip and fake cat ears. All under an oversized brown cloak. Hiding a sin worthy figure. And love for 45 caliber pistols.

I nod before answering. 

"Yes." Point at other spots. "Careful of the red sauce. Very spicy." Like moths to the flame, the hungry adventurers are drawn to the table. "Try the booze too. A lot of it is from the store but only bought stuff listed as non-toxic to humans."

Little plates are grabbed and filled with surprising speed. Hehe. Even Ce dumps me to skip over and dig in. Would tell them to save room for dinner but they aren't children. They are also rankers now. So their appetites are larger. All that energy doesn't just come from mana.

I have been forgotten as the room fills with "so good," "yummy," "wow," and "try this." Geesh, it's just a meat and veggie tray. Though the chaos pretty much wiped out all the "perishable" food within the first week. And store prices for them are a lot higher than "nonperishables" like rice, flour, jerky and cans.

*tink* *clink* *glug*

Glasses and bottles soon follow. Silence reigns over the now barren snack tray. After sipping a surprisingly cold mead-like drink. Po stares at me in shock as his brain catches up.

"Lord above, how much did this cost?"

"Altogether?" He nods at me. "Hmm… I'd say almost fifty gold scrips."

*pf-gulp*

Max nearly spits out a mouthful of rum. But catches himself realizing how expensive it is and struggles through swallowing it down. Finally manages to speak.

"Cough, ahem, well tastes a lot better than the local shine and rotgut."

That ain't no lie. The guild has a bar but only the cheapest stuff sells. Of course several stills are running but the drinks coming out of them are rough, to put it lightly. Thank god there's healing magic for the ones who go blind.

*clap* *clap*

Further comments are stopped by clapping from the dining room table. Nina is standing next to it looking as prim and proper as a sexy cat maid can.

"Dinner, is served, nyah."

"Thank you, Nina." I face the Minutemen. "Leave the hardware. Don't want a spear in the gravy."

It's cute watching them share wary glances. Grudgingly the heavier stuff is stripped and left on the couch. I'm sure they have knives and pistols/revolvers hidden within easy reach. In the end only Vin insists on keeping his shotgun too.

Another song on the cd player while we grab seats at the big table.

♫Oh the shark, babe, has such teeth, dear. And it shows them, pearly white. Just a jack knife, has old MacHeath, babe. And it keeps it, uh, out of sight…♫

I had planned on doing a formal five, six or more course dinner like I was used to on steam planet. But Nina and I quickly realized there was no one to impress here. No potential investors. No customers or rivals.

Just hungry people. So, turkey and ham at the same time coming right up!

The center of the table is filled with dishes. Turkey, salmon, mutton, ham, mashed potatoes, corn, green beans, cauliflower, sprouts, cranberries, etc, etc… Or the nearest equivalents I could find.

Sensing potential trouble, the other Minutemen block Vin from sitting next to me or Ce. It's me on one end with Ce then Lez to my right. Po then Max to my left. And the Guardian on the opposite end.

♫How lucky can one guy be. I kissed her and she kissed me. Like the fella once said…♫

Ah, Dean Martin. And that reminds me of Jerry. Damn, was a real shame when they stopped his telethons.

What followed could be, charitably, called “a massacre.” Going down in history as fake Thanksgiving’s darkest day. Whether turkey drumstick or gravy glop. Brussel sprout or mutton chop. No quarter was given. No mercy shown. No surrender allowed.

Christ, would have needed three stomachs and six mouths to stand a chance of keeping up.

Yep, it's official. Being an arms dealer has made me soft. Got used to the good life. Remember vacuuming up food like that in cyber land. Where the meal was less to be enjoyed and more to “get in my belly!”

Maybe in this world I should be a chef? Spend paragraph after paragraph describing every step of the cooking and eating process in coma inducing detail.

…

Nah.

Nina is doing an admirable job of picking up the empty dishes and setting out the deserts. All also served at once instead of broken up into multiple courses. And suffering the same fate as the poor bastards before them. Until, at long last. The last fork falls silent. The last spoon lays spent. And it is all quiet on the Thanksgiving front.

*belch* *burp*

Okay, not completely quiet.

Sexbot tiredly, "nyah's," and again collects plates. Pouring wines at the same time. Giving four choices for flavors. Bold, fruity, earthy and light.

And ignoring Lez pinching her butt.

I went with a fruity red. Not much of a wine drinker though.

Every Minuteman looks stuffed, bloated even. Max takes a sip and groans.

“Daaaamn, king. Don’t think I’ve had a meal this good in my entire life.” Several nod in agreement. “And… I’m sorry. Ce told us about Cynthia.” Awkward. “It's just, see, none of us even knew you were an item.” Waves his hand. “Would have told you weeks ago, man.”

I laugh.

"You know, it's almost funny now. Thinking about it. For the last few months? We really weren't."

That gets an odd look from Lez.

"I never fucking saw you together."

"Yep, she'd been mostly avoiding me for months already. Didn't think much of it because I was busy as hell." Shake my head. "And after the screens appeared? Spent all my time fighting or fixing."

Po sniffs his glass of white light.

"So you had no idea? No clue?"

*squeeze*

Cecilia's left hand grips my artificial right and I smile in thanks.

"Nope. She said she didn't want to fight monsters and I let it go." Chuckle. “Claimed she was a volunteer nurse and counselor for the refugees. Hehe. I just didn’t realize she was doing it on her back and knees.”

Bobby Darin comes up again.

♫Somewhere~ beyond the sea. Somewhere, waitin for me. My lover stands on golden sand~~…♫

Vin scoffs.

“The King Louie that I knew would be mad. Real mad.”

Ce and Nina give him a dirty look. My cat maid puts a cigar in my mouth and lights it.

*flick* *foosh* *puff* *puff* *exhale*

But I don’t take him seriously.

“Hehe, no I wouldn’t.” Rub a thumb against Ce’s hand and she blushes. Yes, I did it just to annoy him. “Cynth will suffer. I’ll make sure of it. What she did to me was unforgivable.” Inhale, roll the smoke and exhale. “Won’t kill her for it though. No, what I will kill her for though? Is what she, Johnny, and the rest did to my mother and sister.” Lock eyes with the tank. “And it will be a slow death. Gruesome. Painful. The big question is how do I keep them conscious the whole time? How to keep them sane?”

The assassin mutters.

“Jesus, Louie, that’s fucked up.”

Raise an eyebrow.

“Is it? Guess they shouldn’t have fucked with me then.” Inhale, taste the smoke and exhale. “Would be a real shame if they escape into madness or unconsciousness. Oh, and of course it has to be very public.” Light bulb. “Maybe crucifixion in front of town hall?”

The priest sideeyes me.

“The Louis I knew was kind, humble,” looks around, “and thrifty.” Scowls. “This? Is not you.”

I laugh.

“Well dying changes a guy.”

Suddenly everything goes quiet. Everyone, except me and Nina, freezes. Forgot to put the cd player on repeat so there’s no music now either.

Max is the first to respond.

“What?”

Tilt my head.

“Died. That’s what I did. Just chose to not stay dead. Got back up and killed all those gobs.” See Po’s eyes getting big as saucers. “No, pastor, I'm not undead. Just got a new outlook on life.”

Four of the five Minutemen are feeling pretty nervous.

“New outlook?” Alessandra hesitantly asks.

Wide grin.

“Yep! Let me ask you something. Do you know how much sleep I've had in the last month?’

Lez doesn’t know what to say so I continue.

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“Hours. And that’s total.” Ignore the disbelieving looks. “I shit you not. Fixing and fighting. Fighting and fixing. Constantly.” Blow a smoke ring. “Do any of you know what music I like? What drink? What food? Hell, when’s my birthday?”

Not even Ce can answer that, and looks guilty over it, so I carry on.

“And I actually trained you guys. Ran you through raid after raid. Led sweep after sweep.” Pan across them. “But I know a lot about you. Names. Families. Pasts.” Lock my peepers on Vin. “Even who you like.”

Ce’s hand in mine is shaking.

“But… I… We…”

Squeeze it again to reassure her.

“It’s okay. Just making a point.”

“What point?” Pedro asks.

“That none of you knew me.” Smile sympathetically. “Another funny bit. Cynth tried to go down on me after I saved her life, again, during the first dungeon break.” Shake my head. “Was going to let her too. But what do you know? King Louie, come quick, more monsters.” Puff puff no pass. “Everyone’s only seen me in save-the-world mode.” Chuckle. “Well, I’m done with that.”

“Done?” Po inquires.

“Abso-fucking-lutely.” Evil smirk. “Why waste another chit on folks fucking my ex? Why save money to throw at townies who won’t, or can’t, pull their own weight?” Pick up and look at the burning part of my stogie. “How many, do you think, saw my mother and sister being led out of town and did nothing about it?”

Vin starts looking really nervous, and Max notices.

“Vin?”

I ignore the implication and continue.

“Hell, sis hadn’t even broken through to Copper yet. Was still a Tin. Mom wasn’t even that. Just working at the soup kitchen. Neither of them had any business leaving town. Wonder who was working the gate that night?”

Should note that while system purchased stores come with a manager. They don’t come with anyone else. So one of their jobs is to hire and train people. Helps inject chits into the local economy and spread non-combat classes. Like crafters.

And while the towers and walls just get militia unless there’s an attack? The gates always have militia and adventurers. Since it's a weak point. Each shift pays decently and has a signup sheet in the guild. Easy peasy to find out who was there that night. After I left to get drunk that night and before I came back the next morning.

But I think I already know at least one adventurer who was there.

Oh yeah, he looks guilty as hell. In fact, all of them do. Even Ce. Though I bet the reasons are different. Ce’s got a solid alibi, my dick, so she’s in the clear. Max, Po and Lez are probably good too. Since they were there drinking with us. Until my lover and I, “got a room.”

Do not recall seeing Vin though.

“Mister the king?” Spellblade isn’t sure what to say. “Ah… maybe… see… what about family?”

Oh, I get it. Max has relatives among the refugees. So do Lez and Po. Ce and Vin don’t though. Just the thought of me going on a rampage, should make them nervous. Electrineer can dish out some seriously scary AOE.

“I said those who can’t or won’t pull their weight.” Puff exhale. “Nothing about those who can. Nor the families of those who can.” The look of relief on their faces is palpable. Time to drop the hammer. “You know, the land owner never loses their authority. He can share it. Loan it. But never lose it.” See wheels turning in Po’s head. “He can also unshare it. Unloan it.”

Realization rocks Max.

“You’re going to take back Fort Matthews.”

Grin and nod.

“The council failed me. The mayor failed me. The sheriff failed me. Fuck, even the rats failed me.” Crush what’s left of my cigar. “Everyone was just fine and dandy with using me. Well, now it's my turn to use them.”

Vin quietly whispers in the silent room.

“Uh. What if they don’t want to be used?”

My smile gets even wider.

“Then they’ll find out just how dark the real me can be.” Pick up my glass that Nina’s just refilled. “How about a toast then?” Push my chair back and stand. "Long live Fort Matthew. And long live the King. Which is me."

Cecilia looks overjoyed and stands right away. Alessandra, Pedro, and Maxwell hesitate but rise too. As does Vincent. But that’s not a wine glass in his hands.

*BOOM*

"Nooo!"

*BOOM*

"Vin!"

*BOOM*

"Stop!"

The first buckshot from his shotgun, ten feet away, picks me bodily up off my feet. The second and third just add speed to my trajectory. Flying away from the table.

Bet he would have kept shooting too. If Max hadn't slammed into his side. Ripping the shotgun out of Vin's hands and sending the tank rolling into the lounge.

"What the hell did you do?" The Minutemen's leader demands. "What did you do?!"

Vin looks up from the floor and screams back.

"I didn't know! Didn't know they would kill his family!"

"What?!"

"Tony told me! Told me Louie was fucking Ce! That he would treat her bad. Just like he messed up Cynthia!"

Max doesn't know what he's hearing. But Po catches on.

"So Johnny's thug told you that Cynthia's a whore because Louis made her one?"

Huh, how quickly they forget about the guy their friend just killed. Blasted all the way to the back wall. Who their nuker is bawling over while cradling me in her arms, by the way. Maybe they decided it's no use crying over spilt milk?

Lez is next to Ce but hears Vin and stomps his way.

"Bullshit! You fucking liar!" The tank flinches back. "Johnny is Cynthia's pimp. Broke her and made her a whore. Everyone knows it! You watched her porn with me. Stuff from months ago." Sticks her finger in his face. "King's in none of them! But Johnny's in plenty."

The Guardian stutters as his deception is exposed.

"I… Uh. Um. He…"

But Lez is pissed and rolls on.

"Louie didn't do shit to that skank. Remember the early videos? Where she would cry over cheating on her boyfriend? Limp dick… Lou?" Turns back towards my apparent corpse. "Oh… fuck."

The party’s DPS has well and truly had enough.

“Stop lying Vin! Tell me the truth right fucking now or you’re out!”

With tears in his eyes the Guardian finally comes clean.

“Fine! Yes! Tony said we just need to get his mom and sister out of town. Stash them somewhere safe.” Points my way. “Let that lucky fucker suffer for a change!” Climbs to his feet and stares down Max. “Promised me Johnny will make Limp Dick Lou stay away from Ce too.” God that’s a disgusting sneer. “Just need to let Johnny's boys through when they bring them.”

Po looks like he's stepped in a pile of shit.

“God may forgive you for this. But I will not. Nor will anyone in Fort Matthews.”

Vincent’s acting like he’s got it all figured out. It's not a good look.

“Pastor, come on, who’s gonna tell them?” He makes his pitch. “We stay quiet and everyone wins. The council gets the town. Johnny is safe from Louie. Tell the sheriff we didn’t find anything. The mayor will even split the loot with us. We’re rich.” Turns to the assassin. “How much we get?

She spits in disgust but answers anyway.

“Nothing dropped yet.”

Vin is confused.

“What? But he’s dead. So something had to drop.”

Shorty puts her hands on her hips.

Fuck you, asshole! If I said nothing dropped then… nothing?” She closes her eyes and hangs her head. “Oh… fuuuck.”

*clap* *clap* *clap* 

The four in the lounge turn to see me standing. Princess-carrying Cecilia and looking tenderly at her. The clapping came from my left. Where Nina is watching them. Her fake cat ears and tail are gone now. But she still has the maid costume on. The no longer a cat maid's voice is sharp and clear.

“Congratulations! I don’t know how. But you’ve managed to live this long. Despite being really, really, stupid.”

My maid looks at them like they’re worms. I hand the fainted sorceress over to the sexbot and she takes her to our room. Blowing me a kiss as she disappears through the backdoor.

Turn to the four moroneers who are all staring at me with their mouths hanging open. Thanks to storage magic I’ve already swapped the shredded purple suit for a green three piece. So you can’t even tell I was shot.

“I imagine you have some… questions.”

Materialize the cane and walk back over to the dining table. Pick up my chair, face it towards them, and sit down. Vincent is almost beside himself in shock.

“No way. Just, no. That was buckshot. Three shells of 12 gauge buckshot. No way you’re still alive.”

Shake my head at the seemingly paralyzed four. Stand the walking stick in front of me and rest both hands on it.

“Poor jealous stupid Vin. This is why I put Max in charge. And why does everyone always think I’m just lucky?” Sigh. “Bust my ass every day. Every fucking day. Work harder than any of you. But while you sit in the guild, drink a beer and I’m on my third dungeon raid that day. Lazy ignorant assholes like you just snort and claim I must be lucky.”

Maxwell, out of all of them, probably knows best how well and truly screwed they are right now. But Vin’s been his friend since high school. So he feels like he has to try.

“Ah, mister the king? There’s got to be something we can do to make this right. Right? Please?”

But Vin is still off in delusional land.

“No! He’s dead. He’s got to be dead!”

Lez snorts.

“Fuck you, you fuck. He’s not dead. But we sure as fuck are, thanks to you!”

Fortunately, Po still has most of his marbles.

“While I agree with my sister that we will likely die shortly. Might I ask how you survived?”

Hehe. Always pays to be polite to the guy who might kill you at any moment.

“Alright, what have I been warning you guys about over and over again? About those guns that you think are so amazing?”

Max’s panicked brain is running at hyper speed. Desperately searching for a way to survive this monumental fuck up.

“That, ah, they wouldn’t work against the stronger monsters.”

Nod.

“Good. Now even as a Bronze I’m harder to kill with guns.”

Max squints.

“But that was buckshot. And buckshot kills Iron grade monsters. Is there that big a difference?”

I frown back at them.

“No, three shells of them could have killed a Bronze. But it's not a sure thing. Chances are I would have been injured and out of the fight. But still survive.” Glance at the backdoor. “Of course, if that had happened? Nina would have ripped you all apart. In minutes, if not seconds.”

See a tremble travel through them when they remember how many robots I have running around. Po speaks.

“Then…”

“Yes, there was another factor you missed. Another thing you forgot. [Identify].”

Max groans, Vin looks confused. Lez hangs her head, and Po closes his eyes.

Remember, the apocalypse just started a month ago. And we’ve had a guild in Fort Matthew for less than two weeks. None of the youngins have a military background. Some older ones in the militia do but starting the ranker journey is harder the older you are. Teens and twenties are the goldilocks zone.

The active duty guys were the first to fight. And first to die.

[Identify] is a very handy skill that you can learn at the guild, with some difficulty. Not everyone can get it. Takes a certain level of focus and concentration. But even for those who do? They're amateurs, still learning the ropes. So it's not unusual for them to forget the non-combat skills sometimes.

In the Minutemen, Po, Lez and Ce have it.

“Why does it just show question marks?” Po asks.

“Remember, basic [Identify] only works up to two grades higher.”

The assassin slumps her shoulders.

“We are so fucked.”

I nod happily.

“Yes, you are.” Lean back. “After my heart was shattered into very tiny pieces. I was approached by a goddess from the pantheon of pain.” Glare at the increasingly pale tank. “Luckily I had the love of my life betray me so completely. That the fucking pantheon of pain thought I would be a good fit.” Turn completely sarcastic. “Wasn’t that fucking lucky of me you murdering lying sack of shit?”

Max groans again.

“A goddamn champion. Vin, you motherfucking stupid son of a bitch.”

Tilt and shake my head.

“I did drop a couple of clues. But wasn’t sure who I could trust. So didn’t tell you outright.”

Lez whistles.

“So you’re a fuckin Steel ranker now?”

Sigh.

“Works up to two ranks higher. Come on, Lez, I just told you. You are Iron rank. So [Identify] will work on Tin, Copper, Iron, Bronze and Steel. Question marks would mean I’m at least Silver.”

That rattles them again.

“Fuuuuuck.”

The assassin’s insightful statement sums up their current situation quite well.

Pedro begins muttering a prayer.

“Our father, who art in heaven…”

Vincent is pale as a ghost and sweating a lot. Alessandra drops into one of the lounge chairs and starts crying a little. Maxwell, however, hasn’t given up yet.

“What do we have to do? To live. Is there any chance?”

Snicker and smile.

“Oh Max, I don’t plan to kill you.” The other three’s heads popup and stare at me. “At least not right now. You just have to work for me. Doing whatever the fuck I tell you to do.” Chuckle. “You might not only live through this? May end up rich and powerful too.”

Color finally starts coming back to their faces. Like they just dodged an entire storm of bullets.

“Except for Vin. That piece of shit dies here and now.”

*BANG*

Vincent’s head snaps to the right as a 45 caliber slug enters his left temple. Exploding out the right side immediately afterwards and burying itself into the far wall.

Max shouts.

“Lez! No!”

Still pointing a pistol at Vin, she shouts right back.

“Fuck you, minuteman. Your buddy betrayed us and fucked us. But you still want to give him a pass?” *pop* “Oh you fucking fuck!”

“What the hell is this?”

Max can’t believe what he’s seeing.

That sound was the guardian's loot dropping. If any of the rest of the Minutemen died? You would expect to see copper chits, copper scrips, maybe a few silver chits.

Certainly not a pile of silver chits and scrips.

“That bastard!” The assassin is so angry she forgets to drop an f-bomb. “He was skimming!”

Just as there is an [Identify] skill? There is also the [Loot] skill. Making it easier to find and collect valuables. Also taught at the guild, only two in the party have it. Alessandra, and Vincent.

Po walks over, kneels, places a palm on what's left of Vin's head and prays.

"Loving and merciful God. Please accept Vincent into your grace. Wash away his mortal sins. And grant him eternal peace. In the name of the father. The son. And the holy spirit. Amen."

Max just keeps shaking his head.

“I trusted you. Defended you. In front of the king, Ce, Po, everyone. And this is how you repay me?” Screams in frustration. “Goddammit!”

At this moment Nina walks back in.

“Master, the sorceress is awake and asking for you.”

“Thank you, please take Alessandra back so she can reassure her. I will be there shortly.”

Sexbot bows. Lez and Po share a look before she walks past me and follows Nina through the backdoor. I stand, look at the remaining two Minutemen and sigh.

“It's been a long day. So I’m going to bed.” Motion at Vin. “Do whatever you are going to do with the body. Robots will come along soon to dispose of it. And Nina will be back shortly to show you to your rooms.” Look back over my shoulder after turning away. “You may loiter around here and your rooms. Go anywhere else and you will be killed. We will discuss what happens next over breakfast tomorrow.”

Wave as I walk away.

“Goodnight gentlemen. Sleep tight.”

…

Time for this king to pick a queen.

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