Chapter 100: Man vs Dad

Instead of a shotgun, Braniño welcomed his future son-in-law with a torrent of red lightning.

Basil fearlessly charged straight into the attack with his halberd raised. The surge of electricity slided over his enchanted armor like water on a swan’s feathers without inflicting damage. Stray bolts hit the buffet behind him, setting food plates on fire and shocking servants.

“Hasten!” Basil shouted, activating his belt’s magic alongside his Death’s Banner Perk. Time slowed down around him as he closed in on the demon lord.

“Death or Glory,” Braniño replied, his words sounding stretched to Basil’s ears. “Accelerated Hasten!”

He dodged Basil’s halberd in the blink of an eye.

Braniño not only caught up to his foe in the shifting time; he avoided a lightning-fast strike with casual ease. Vasi’s father danced around Basil and summoned a crimson rapier to his hand. Four bells attached to the pommel rang as the weapon appeared.

Braniño’s Agility, Skill, and Strength have increased at the cost of his Vitality!

Braniño hastened himself!

The guests stepped back to form a large ring around the two combatants, but did not make a move to intervene. Quite the contrary. They started to chant “fight, fight, fight!” with the zeal of soccer hooligans welcoming a surprise match. Not even Braniño’s bodyguards dared to interrupt the battle and simply cheered from the sidelines.

Only one person spoke out against the duel.

“Stop this madness!” Vasi shouted in alarm from the sidelines as her father and boyfriend pursued each other across the dancefloor. “Basil, back off! We’re surrounded!”

She was right to be worried for his safety. He was dueling a demon lord while surrounded by his high-level relatives. Yet none of them seemed willing to intervene, even to assist their brethren. Some people in the audience cheered for Basil rather than his enemy.

And Braniño wouldn’t give him any quarter. Basil could tell that throwing his weapon aside and surrendering would end with his swift execution.

“I’m trying!” Basil replied. He supposed that a demon lord could survive with his limbs chopped off. That should calm him down. “But your dad isn’t helping!”

According to the System, Vasi’s father was part Dragon Type. A single halberd blow would bring him low, no matter the level gap between the two of them. Basil leaped into the air with Double Jump and attempted to attack the demon lord from above.

There was no way a rapier as thin as a needle could stop a two-meters long halberd, but the demon lord’s sword parried Basil’s strike all the same. Braniño raised his sword almost faster than the eyes could follow and repelled the halberd back.

Basil wielded his weapon with his two hands.

Braniño held his rapier with one, and still won the strength contest.

That wasn’t a good sign.

“Can everyone cast Hasten nowadays?” Basil cursed as he jumped around the other duelist, looking for an opening. Since Braniño appeared left-handed, he decided to attack from the right to bypass the rapier altogether.

“It’s a C-list buff,” the demon lord replied contemptuously before casting more spells on himself. “Here’s the A-material: Alacrity, Accelerated Afterimage!”

Braniño’s casting time for Tier III spells and below has been greatly shortened!

Braniño’s Evasion Value has doubled!

Basil’s halberd hit the ground with enough force to splinter the floor. He missed all the same. Braniño became a blur of speed, a crimson mirage that hopped around the ballroom. He was on Basil’s left one second and on his right the next.

Holy shit, he’s way faster than me! Basil realized to his horror. At least twice more, maybe thrice!

That was bad. Even if Krampus could use the Hasten spell too, the speed gap between Basil and the ancient fairy had been close to nonexistent. The Dragonknight hadn’t fought a foe that much faster than him since Megabug, all the way back at the beginning of his journey.

For a brief moment, Basil glimpsed a white hue in Braniño’s eyes; he heard the demon lord mutter words under his breath, though he couldn’t distinguish them clearly from the shouts of the audience.

The effect was immediate nonetheless.

Basil suddenly felt a weakness seize him. He coughed as a chilling cold spread to his limbs. His vision blurred. His senses dulled to the point he struggled to understand the shouts of the crowd and his girlfriend’s warnings.

Braniño’s [Tercio de Banderillas] lowered your Evasion and Accuracy Values!

Then came the pain.

Basil didn’t see the projectiles coming, but he felt them; first in his back, then his legs and chest. Bullets of air surged from all around him. Braniño fired one from behind, then the left and the right. None came from the same spot and Basil’s own eyes struggled to follow the shooter’s movements.

Superffective Damage! 114 [Wind] damage! 114 [Wind] damage! 114 [Wind] damage! 114 [Wind] damage!

As Basil watched his health points crumble faster than the stock exchange during a financial crisis, he jumped all the way to the ceiling. Switching tactics, he formed an Elemental Orb of fire and threw it at the ballroom floor. The projectile exploded in a burst of smoke and flames. An invisible shape moved through them clearly enough to leave a trail.

I have you now, Basil thought as he threw his halberd like a javelin with all his strength. His weapon surged across the room faster than a missile. A direct hit would fell even the mightiest dragon.

And then the halberd vanished.

Braniño pointed at the projectile with his rapier. A purple flash of light swallowed the halberd for a second, and in a blink it was gone from this world. Basil almost choked at the sight.

Braniño sealed away your [Croque-Mordeuse] in a pocket dimension!

Basil immediately attempted to summon his halberd back to his hand.

He failed.

[Soulbound Weapon]’s teleportation effect only works when you and your weapon are in the same dimension!

Basil wasn’t a man to panic at the first sign of trouble. The sight of colossal titans like Steamslime and Apollyon had at best given him pause. But when he watched his trusty weapon taken from him, he could only think of one word.

Shit.

Shit, shit, shit!

A burst of wind cleared the smoke and flames left from Basil’s attack. Braniño stood in the middle of the ballroom, air swirling around his rapier’s edge.

“You are powerful in close-combat, but pitiful at range,” the demon lord taunted his foe. “Worst of all, you have no means to debuff me. I eat your kind for breakfast!”

“Eat this!” Basil replied before firing a volley of Elemental Orbs at Braniño.

Vasi’s father dashed around the room faster than any projectile and retaliated with more air bullets. Basil used Double Jump to move around, but whatever magic his foe cast on him made him sluggish. Even with Hasten on, he still took two hits to the chest.

114 [Wind] damage! 114 [Wind] damage! Warning! You have lost a fifth of your HP!

“You have bet everything on your main weapon,” the demon lord taunted him. “Without it, none of your multipliers apply!”

Basil suddenly realized that he had never considered keeping a backup spear to keep his proficiencies. His Soulbound Halberd returned to his hand at will, so he had never been in a situation where he couldn’t summon it to his side in a pinch.

If he lived through this, Basil swore to correct this flaw in his fighting style. If he survived.

“That is enough!” Vasi snapped her fingers in her fury. Dark spikes surged from the ground at her command and turned the floor into a minefield, to no avail. Her father simply navigated his way between the spikes without any of them touching him. Basil attempted to use his distraction to target him with fire orbs, but Braniño countered them with a swing of his rapier.

“You bastard!” the demon lord snarled at Basil. “You've turned my teenage virgin daughter against me!”

“You’re a decade too late for the both ‘teenage’ and ‘virgin’ parts, Dad,” Vasi complained. “And if you want to keep the daughter part, you’ll stop attacking my boyfriend at once!”

Goblina, who was watching the fight with a cocktail in hand, shrugged off her worries. “It’s fine, we’ll just bring your boyfriend back if he gets killed. We have the budget.”

Vasi glared at her. “What the hell is wrong with you people?!”

Basil was asking himself the exact same question. With his halberd disabled and his Elemental Orbs proving completely useless, he had precious few tools to rely on. Specialization had made him powerful, but vulnerable to direct counters. Vasi’s father outmatched him as severely as Megabug did early in his adventurer career.

Wait, Basil thought as an idea as he remembered his battle against Apollyon’s drone. He’s a dragon… and a half Bug too.

Inspired, Basil stopped leaping above the ground and instead dived towards his rival like a falcon. He raised his fist as if aiming to punch his foe. Braniño expanded his wings in response and took flight.

His sword pierced Basil’s ribs in midair and came out on the other side of his body.

The attack surprised Basil; for while he felt the blade cut through his chest, it took a moment for the sensation of pain to catch up. The sword shredded his flesh faster than his nervous system could properly register the damage. Basil’s blood splashed on the rapier as Vasi screamed in fear and terror.

Critical hit! Supereffective damage! 1566 [Wind] damage!

Warning, critical health!

That was the moment Basil had waited for.

By springing to attack, his foe had left himself open. Grabbing the surprised Braniño’s arm with one hand, Basil opened his other palm in front of the demon lord’s face.

Braniño could be faster than lightning, he remained a humanoid little heavier than Basil himself. The fact he failed to escape the Dragonknight’s grip meant the difference in strength between wasn’t insurmountable. If pinned down under sufficient weight, he wouldn’t be able to escape.

He was a bug and could be crushed like one.

“Secret Bohen Technique,” Basil whispered as he opened his inventory.

Item selected: [Volkswagen Constellation].

A massive black truck dropped on top of Braniño.

The demon lord let go of his rapier as the vehicle crushed him under his weight. Both fell to the ground in a catastrophic crash, hitting the dragon statue at the center of the hall and shattering one of its wings. The floor managed not to crumble on itself—nobody respected architects nowadays—but cracks spread through the stone nonetheless.

The audience fell into shocked silence at the sight. Basil could only relish it for a few seconds before he fell to the ground and collapsed on his chest. It only made the pain worse, for the rapier was still firmly lodged between his ribs somewhere between the lungs and the heart.

It hurt.

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It hurt like hell.

“Basil!” Vasi rushed to his side and immediately force-fed him a healing potion. She removed the rapier from his chest as the wound slowly closed itself. “Basil, I’m here.”

“We’ll… we’ll skip seeing your mother…” Basil coughed blood, but managed to avoid doing so on his girlfriend’s dress. “If you don’t mind…”

“We’re done here,” Vasi firmly decided as she put his arm over her shoulder and helped him stand. He was thankful for the help; her father’s spell still made him sluggish. “You were right, coming here was a mistake.”

Basil gazed at the audience. The guests were either looking at him with astonishment, or observing the truck with wary eyes. “Is that… Truck-kun?” he heard some of them whisper among themselves. “He can summon Truck-kun?” “He has broken the statue! He has broken Big V’s statue!”

And I thought we were an eccentric lot, Basil thought grimly. He had just crushed their relative under a truck and they were only concerned about the vehicle type. Weirdos. “My halberd… I need my halberd back.”

“He must have dropped it,” his girlfriend replied as she led him towards the truck… and swiftly froze in place.

The truck was shaking.

“Vasi.” Basil took in a deep breath, a hand on his gaping chest wound. “Please tell me I’m hallucinating.”

“I’m afraid not,” his girlfriend replied with a hateful glare.

The truck rolled over to the side with a terrible sound. A winged form emerged from underneath the vehicle; disarmed, but almost unscathed.

“To summon an avatar of the legendary Truck-kun in battle… I underestimated you.” A dreadful black aura swirled around Braniño. An oppressive aura weighted on Basil’s shoulders as if gravity had increased tenfold. “I guess I will have to take you seriously.”

Braniño’s [Demon Lord Authority] boosted all his stats!

Shit, he’s going Super Saiyan!

How hurt is he? Basil wondered. The System deigned to answer his question.

You have taken one fourth of Braniño II Dalton della Maure’s health!

With no other option left, Basil decided to bring out his secret weapon; acquired in Germany, refined in Hungary, never tested in the field.

“Open inventory,” Basil whispered as his foe took a step towards him and Vasi. “Ocean–”

“Enough!” Vasi snapped. “We’re leaving!”

Her voice brimmed with so much anger, so much frustration, that her words hit her father like a slap in the face. The malicious aura surrounding him vanished instantly.

“Darling, calm down,” Braniño pleaded, raising his hands in a peaceful manner.

“Don’t approach me!” Vasi raised a hand at him while helping Basil stand with the other. Her fingers cackled with magical energy. “Don’t take another step towards my boyfriend, or I swear to the gods of Outremonde, I will kill you myself!”

If Basil didn’t love her already, he would have fallen for Vasi all over again.

“Sweetie, he’s not worthy of you!” her father protested.

“Who are you to say that?” Vasi shook her head angrily. “Basil has been here for me more times than I can count, while you… you missed two decades and a half of my life, and when you enter it, you try to murder my boyfriend before an hour’s turn!”

“But I didn’t know you existed!” Braniño complained. “If I had known–”

“You have left my mother for decades and never checked on her!” Vasi replied with a sneer of disgust. “I hoped it was all a misunderstanding, but now I understand why my mother never let us meet.”

She met her father’s gaze.

“I was better off without you.”

The demon lord choked at the remark. His crushed expression drew a vague feeling of sympathy from Basil, but little more. Being stabbed in the chest had a way of ruining a man’s goodwill.

“Sweetie, I…” It was almost amusing to see someone as powerful as this Braniño stammer and struggle to find his words. “I swear, I will make it up-”

“I’m not interested in excuses,” Vasi interrupted him. “Give my boyfriend his halberd back and get out of our lives.”

“Sweetie, please, I didn’t mean–”

The sound of booming thunder echoed in the hall before the demon lord could finish. A bolt of purple lightning erupted out of nowhere and unleashed a cloud of violet smoke where it hit the ground. Basil recognized a teleportation effect.

A handsome woman materialized in the hall. Basil would have mistaken her for Vasi at first glance, if she hadn’t been standing next to him. Much like his girlfriend, the woman was a night hag with purple skin and great horns; but she was older than Vasi, with a few wrinkles and pale blue eyes. Her wild white hair fell like a waterfall on tattered gray robes. She went shoeless, with only a broom for a weapon. Basil would have pegged her as middle-aged, though perhaps a bit younger than his own mother. She took a quick glance at the room and immediately exhaled in annoyance upon seeing the devastation.

Basil guessed her identity long before Braniño spoke it out loud.

“Baba Darling?” he asked with hopeful eyes.

“My daughter,” the witch said, addressing Vasi and utterly ignoring her father. “I was starting to worry about you.”

“Mother?” Vasi’s eyes snapped open in surprise. “Why are you here?”

“I felt a great disturbance in our genealogical tree.” The witch’s eyes went from her daughter to Braniño, whose hopeful expression drew a sigh from her. “I feared this day would come.”

“Baba Darling, you came back!” Braniño joined his hands together, only to pull them back as his joy turned to confusion. “Wait… why didn’t you tell me we had a daughter?”

“To give her a normal childhood!” Vasi’s mother replied in exasperation. “Your father was like this for years! Years! No man could approach your sisters without risking their lives!”

“Braniña still can’t find a boyfriend to this day,” someone commented in the audience. The spectators watched the family reunion with what could pass for mild interest; Basil wondered what it would take to get their full attention.

“Clearly the apple didn’t fall far from the tree,” Baba Yaga commented as she glanced at Basil. “Are you a paladin?”

Somehow, her tone reminded Basil of an old racist asking her daughter if her boyfriend was black.

“Happy to meet you, ma’am,” Basil replied dryly. “I love your daughter.”

“Basil, please,” Vasi replied with a little blush. “In private.”

“Whatever, I will patch you up,” her mother told Basil dismissively. “Let us leave before her grandfather comes back and makes this scene even more awkward.”

Her grandfather? Basil wondered.

A chill went down his spine and the crushing, invisible weight from before returned. He glared at Braniño, expecting another attack, only to see the demon lord sweat in fear. The sound of clenched jaws and grinding teeth echoed among the guests. Every face started to sweat.

“Who dared?!”

The voice came nowhere and everywhere all at once. It was strong; even deeper than the Maleking’s, more confident than Steamslime’s, and more terrible than Apollyon’s. For a second, Basil wondered if God himself was showing his displeasure from the heavens. The audience certainly looked terrified, as did Baba Yaga and her ex.

The winged man from before, Victor, teleported back into the hall right next to the broken dragon statue. The poor guy looked emotionally drained as he surveyed the area.

“I leave for five minutes and I come back to this,” he complained in utter despair. “Five. Minutes.”

The room trembled. The walls shook, and the ceiling looked about to collapse. Basil opened his mouth to warn Vasi of incoming danger, but no sound escaped his throat. A power greater than his will simply wouldn’t allow anyone to speak.

All people present looked in the same direction: the dragon statue. Basil and Vasi did the same, and watched on as stone and gold came to life.

The red dragon statue first reassembled itself. Its broken wing rejoined the stump and fused back with it. But then it started to change, to grow larger and larger until its blackened horns hit the ceiling. A magnificent crown more dazzling than the sun itself appeared on its head. An armor of solid gold and jewels materialized over the statue’s ruby scales. The eyes brightened with all the colors of the rainbow.

The very air simmered around the statue as it became a creature of flesh and blood. The wings, the claws, the tail, all started to move with the vividness of a living creature. The draconic being before Basil was so warm that smoke and steam rose from between its scales. Its claws were sharper than blades, its fangs longer than any halberd. It was a dragon of legends; a mighty beast older than the world, a volcano on legs, fire with wings and a voice brimming with power. Its divine light dazzled the mind. The sight of its majesty inspired only submission.

Before this creature, the false gods of Metal Olympus would have looked like paltry candles next to a sun. Each of these people held the soul of a deity and attempted to pass as one when they met the Bohens. They tried to project power and divinity, and that was their mistake. An audience watching a stage magician could tell their magic was all a trick, even when they didn’t understand the method used. That creature wasn’t trying to inspire awe; for everyone, even subconsciously, could sense the difference between pretending and being.

All had knelt, Basil and Vasi included. They didn’t even think of resisting; Lethal Vigil, Death’s Banner, none of their Perks and spells mattered. No magic, no amount of willpower could help them stand on their own two feet. For they knew the truth, instinctively; the same way a lamb identified a wolf on sight.

That creature was no mere dragon.

“Minion!” the great red wyrm clenched his jaw, holy fire burning between his fangs. “Who dared to vandalize my statue?!”

It was a god.

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