Both a little Scared; Neither one Prepared

Chapter 7: Chapter 7


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Celeste’s grandmother, the Queen of Melya, was…She was a nasty person that didn’t want people to see her bad side.

Celeste was a Princess, she was still able to get away with some things back in the day before too many knew of her as ‘Medusa’, and she had been still pretty small at the age of ten. Already having lived in her small castle for a couple of years but upon visiting her grandmother she had heard who she really was to grandmother and was so stunned that it took her a long time to accept it.

Her grandmother had one specific person that she confides in and that was Advisor Redcliffe. And he was the one that would ‘control’ her, the next ruler of Melya, after her grandmother was gone. He would be the one that was really in charge!

She was just going to be a puppet, someone with no real power!

And, she had even heard her grandmother admit it…Admit that she had no feelings for her whatsoever.

 

From the moment that her son, the previous King of Melya, had left to search for his son, leaving his mother with Celeste, his grandmother had gotten colder and colder as the years went on.

How could a King leave his country like this!? How could her son just leave her!?

Celeste had found her grandmother’s anger to her father and mother was so much that she had practically disowned them.

Why?

Still to this day, Celeste didn’t understand how her grandmother was so keen to cast out her family.

Was it the power of what she had now? Was she thinking that she’d live forever?

Celeste just doesn’t understand how she was never given any loving treatment from her grandmother. But…There was one thing that Celeste could sympathize with, and that is why did both her parents leave? Why couldn’t at least one of them stay and look after her?

It was all so…Weird…

It didn’t make sense!

There had to be some sort of secret that split this family so much that the monarchy was ruined completely!

So, what could be the secret that forced out the King and Queen, after a lost son, leaving the grandmother as Queen to hate her family so viciously that she disowned everyone!?

 

Over the years of knowing this and already being seen as ‘Medusa’, Celeste didn’t hold her anger back. She did do some nasty things if people were nasty to her. If someone stole something, she did beat them up, badly!

If someone wanted to tease her or complain about their job, considering that they were getting paid for it, she beat them up! It came to a point that no one teased her at the small castle, even behind her back! No one stole anything either. Celeste could hold her own but after a point, maids never got replaced and Celeste had to do more and more work and so, she just ended up getting rid of them all, which helped keep her anger at bay.

Since she had decided her fate, her anger had dimmed down, as she was just too busy to care and so, when she gets angry, she’s not as bad as she used to be.

 

It took a while to realize that anger was implied by something, that there was a reason for it. If she could just get to the source of her anger and talk herself through it or somehow try to ignore it if she couldn’t talk herself through it, Celeste felt like anger was something she could get a handle of a lot better.

She had been angry over her family abandoning her, she had gone too far in her punishments and had indeed hurt people beyond what they had done, so later, when she realized her anger and what she was mad with, she felt a bit of guilt. She had been angry over being called ‘Medusa’ and been told to move far away from everyone. Her anger felt like it ran deep but how she dealt with it was…That if she cared about it, making her angry, then perhaps she should not care at all. The problem was, with all the anger, then turning that into a feeling of wasteful energy, or something like that, Celeste found a huge gap in her life. And that was when she became depressed…

 

It’s just that, it was really lonely after everyone left. She might not have someone stealing or teasing her anymore but…Well, there was nothing left to steal now anyway. All her precious items were already gone…

Why was she born into a world like this, when she felt like it was all worthless?

If her parents were only going to leave her, then why bother having her!?

A depression took over her while alone, one that made her feel like she was constantly falling and maybe at first, she was trying not to fall and hang on to something but, after a while…She just let go…

Life become so simplistic to her that the castle seemed to slowly become dust and dirt. What was the point of cleaning it when it would only get dirty again?

Doing only what she had too and eating a small amount of stuff, she just trained in martial arts on her spare time…

 

Those days…She can barely remember them…

Upon being in Commorda hadn’t done much to her depression either, even when being cornered by four people…

It was when Steven had just placed himself in his brother’s ‘place’ that Celeste felt something.

Something else, other than despair…

Back then she had no intention of taking anyone, she would have left the country with nothing…

But seeing that hungry and dirty man’s plea for someone else that just came across as an immature idiot, she couldn’t help but want to take him with her…So that she could give him something to eat…So that she could understand that pain inside of him too.

 

From the first moment she saw Steven, Celeste already felt like some invisible force was pulling her towards him.

Even though she got some looks from her guards, when she ordered them around to get a cage and put it in the carriage, she didn’t care.

Everyone was either scared of her or kept their distance and so what she asked for was done before she goes on a ‘rampage’ and so, she brought Steven back with her…

For the first time in a long time, she felt glad to be of so much help to someone. Seeing him thank her for just a crust of bread and soup, along with water, made her feel like she was living again…It was the first time that she thought that perhaps she was born for another reason, maybe for someone else. A thought like that had never occurred to her before, perhaps it was scary…Whatever the reason, Celeste felt more life within her, which she can only thank Steven for.

 

 

By now, having been lost in her thoughts, Celeste had cleaned the floor to the stairs, where it was noticeably cleaned by someone else.

Picking up the dirty cloth and the bucket, she emptied and left the bucket in the bathroom, then took the dirty cloth and her wet clothes downstairs.

Seeing the floors nice and clean, Celeste started to understand what it was like to feel proud of her home. She liked it nice and clean, simply because it was so easy to find things that she needed and well, it looked better! The windows were see through downstairs now. The brass was shiny…

It looked a lot nicer then just a few weeks ago…

Smiling, Celeste walked into the kitchen, then put the dirty washing on the other side, where the laundry went, and then turned.

Where was Steven?

 

Steven’s room wasn’t that far from the kitchen, so with hearing a cough, Celeste heard where he was.

Frowning, she went to him to find him sleeping.

It seems he might be getting sick…

Silly man…

Celeste, over the next few minutes, didn’t find him all that bad at this time. But as she finished making some soup and getting ready to go to bed, Steven did get worse.

It seemed that trip on the lake wasn’t the start of things.

Steven might have been eating better lately but having been starved not to long ago, Celeste wondered if that could be a reason why he fell so sick so quickly.

 

Steven seemed unable to focus much when she woke him for soup, only eating half of it. But there wasn’t much else she could do without going into town.

She’d given him some ginger, also the left-over garlic, which wasn’t much. But what else?

Maybe some oranges?

It had been about a year since she had gotten sick with the cold, so she took a bit to try to remember what would help!

It was a bit of a panic to do whatever she could to help Steven get better! It was almost like the first time that someone else’s life was in her hands, and she couldn’t bare to have anything else go wrong!

She didn’t want to see him worse, she didn’t want to see him stuck on the bed where he was somewhat awake and where he could barely notice that he was supposed to swallow.

 

Steven’s health worried Celeste that much that she was at his bedside all night long.

Barely able to get much sleep, she changed the cloth on his forehead and even thought of honey in the middle of the night.

She had made so much noise when it was dark that if she weren’t by herself, she might have people yell at her from waking them up! But she had forgotten something else that helps a cold! As soon as she remembered honey, she got to work, wanting to get some into Steven as fast as possible!

Luckily, she had some on hand, because she had her own bees, so all she had to do was find and chop up a soft vegetable. Not only that, but she also made some warm, honey drink for him to have straight away.

But yes, she had little sleep that night…

 

***

 

Steven woke up to find the princess right beside him.

Widening his eyes, he moved away from her and tried to remember what was going on!

Seeing and feeling something fall down, he looked at the cloth and narrowed his eyes…What was going on?

Picking it up, he put it into a dish of water on the other side of the princess.

“Are you awake? How are you feeling?”

Looking at the obviously sleepy woman beside him, Steven nodded, but she still had her eyes closed so she wouldn’t see it, “I’m…”

Clearing his throat, he frowned, “I have a sore throat.”

The princess finally opened her eyes, “There’s a honey drink…It’s probably cold by now though.”

Steven saw a cup and picked it up, it was indeed cold, but he still drank it all, and it did make him feel better.

 

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Finally, he started to put two and two together and asked, “I was sick?”

The princess nodded, her eyes closing again.

Getting back down, to lay down completely, Steven felt bad for not wanting to tell her it was ok for her to go. He felt bad for not picking her up and taking her to her own bedroom.

Wanting to reach out to touch her, he stopped himself, instead he stared.

The princess suddenly smiled, “Are you staring at me?”

Steven looked away, “No.”

“Liar…”

The princess turned around, now facing away from him, and Steven was stunned to her hand that came to pick up his hand to put it around her.

 

He went to say ‘Princess’, only to know that she’d probably would want him to call her ‘Celeste’, but then if he said ‘Celeste’, was that too personal?

Dam, he wanted to do so much, yet had no idea on what to do!

It was…Awkward!

“Relax!” Celeste ordered, feeling Steven all tensed up…The awkwardness was hanging in the air, and she didn’t like it.

“Relax?” Steven asked, his throat making his voice sound slightly different.

“Mmm. Relax…” Celeste stated, holding onto his hand better.

 

Are you…Stupid, woman!?

How the hell can I relax like this!

Steven didn’t know what to do!

His hand had been stolen, and so he was stuck!

But how could he relax with her body right beside him like this!

The bed wasn’t that big!

He was already touching her in one place simply because there wasn’t enough room!

“Princess…There isn’t much room…” Steven stated.

Celeste audibly sighed and moved more into him on purpose.

“Hey! Hold it!” Steven was on pins and needles here. She was too close!

“Go to sleep…”

“Sleep!? How the hell could I sleep with you so close to me!?” Steven muttered.

 

Celeste smiled and said nothing.

She really liked how he acted like this with her. It made her feel like she had power over him.

But…She didn’t want to leave…

It wasn’t like she was trying to lose her innocence or anything, it was more like she’d worry too much about him if she left.

It just felt smarter if she were to stay here and why not use the same bed…

They liked each other so…Shouldn’t they be able to just sleep like this?

But it was nice…To have his hand in hers, almost like a security blanket…A protection…

One that stopped her from feeling that she was nothing and that the world held no joy.

His hand was like there was at least one thing that was here for her…

Turning her head, to see him staring at her, she smiled at him. “What are you so worried about?”

 

“…You are bordering a fine line here, Princess.” Steven said, somewhat pouting…

This wasn’t fair…

Never did he feel so tempted…He had never gone that far with a woman, but he knew how it all worked and she was just teasing him so much right now!

Putting her free hand over to his head, she brought his head down to hers, to kiss him.

What line?

Is there a line?

Should there be a line if she was only going to die soon?

But Steven did feel otherwise. Celeste was just too precious to ruin her…But he did kiss her back.

Holding her hand tighter in his, that was around her waist, he did get more comfortable as they were kissing and he let her go and put his head into her neck, “Why are you doing this to me? You know I can’t be with a Princess…”

 

Celeste turned her head back around and put her hand back to his, “And if I wasn’t a princess?”

“But you are.” Steven said, “You silly girl.”

Celeste blushed and closed her eyes, “What if I decline to marry any other but you?”

Steven sighed in her neck, making her squirm, only making things harder for himself…

“I’m not a good person Celeste. I’ve hurt people…”

“So have I.”

Steven held her closer to him, almost like he wanted to help both of them rid of their bad sides. “I’ve locked someone in a place before without food or water. That same person, I bullied endlessly and even tried to take away his true happiness.”

Celeste opened her eyes and stayed quiet.

 

Steven continued, maybe wondering if this will stop the princess from liking him, “I took away his business, forcing his own loyal men out of it. I rummaged in his room, wanting to steal, then left without ever cleaning up the mess that I had made. I never helped him when he needed it, I never gave him what he deserved!”

Celeste held his hand tighter but still stayed silent.

Steven sighed, “I was a spoilt, rich child that didn’t care for consequences, that didn’t care for other people and…I was stupid…I still am stupid! Don’t fall for someone like me, Princess. You deserve so much more.”

Finally, Celeste opened her mouth to talk, “I’ve become a part of the rebellion to up rise against the monarch of Melya, what have you got over me? Please Steven, I don’t see myself as a Princess, so stop seeing me as one. All I know is that I like you, you have helped me find some sort of meaning…So please stop pushing me away…”

 

Rebellion?

What was she talking about?

Steven got a bit lost in his thoughts, a bit slower thinking then usual so he was quiet for a short time.

It was like Celeste had talked into a completely different language though because Steven couldn’t make heads or tails out of it!

The problem was, his mind was groggy, and he was still sleepy, so he could only take words in without thinking more into it before he went back into feeling her beside him.

This beautiful woman that made him feel different then any other was right beside him, almost like they were already a married couple.

Looking after him, sleeping next to him, living with him…Steven yawned to his drowsiness and remembered that he shouldn’t really be this close to her…

She was a princess…A really pretty princess…

 

“…Silly girl…” Steven muttered, once again into her neck…Again making her slightly squirm to how it was ticklish.

But no more conversations were made as they slowly dozed back off, embraced in each other’s arms.

Steven was glad though that she wasn’t looking at him, because he did have to cough once or twice, but she never let him go, even when he said that he didn’t want her to get sick.

“I’ll deal with it better then you would!” Was all Celeste stated.

It just wasn’t fair…

Steven couldn’t let her go but couldn’t hold on to her too tight either.

Their last conversation was still in both their heads and both of them wanted to believe that it should be ok to be with the other but…There was just one wall that didn’t seem easy to tear down…

Steven didn’t know what it was, but Celeste did…It was because her death was probably just weeks away…

That was probably why the wall won’t get pulled down…At least for now…

 

***

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