Chapter 28: 17.2

Feb 26, 2014, Wednesday.

"I can't believe Ms. Goh is making remedial lessons compulsory for me," I grumble as I trudge down the corridor with Emma and Adrian. "Like, the point of remedial lessons is extra lessons, right? How can it be compulsory sia?"

Yesterday, Jon stopped the three of us before we left for our lunch break to tell me that I needed to come to the remedial class this week, and I had to scramble with Devan to find a last-minute substitute for my shift. Just thinking about this causes a groan to escape.

I know these extra lessons would help with my failing grades, but I really don't have the time to go to them now.

"You failed too many Chemistry quizzes lah," Adrian remarks. "But why am I going? My grades are just fine."

"Aiyo, don't complain and just come with us lah!" Emma chides as she wraps her hands around my arm protectively. Ever since my breakdown on Monday, Emma has been especially gentle towards me, giving me all the hugs and love that I am missing out on. "Do you want Chloe to go alone?"

Adrian ignores Emma and continues his rant. "I shouldn't be forced to do this sia. This is against my rights. This is illegal."

Emma chortles. "Illegal? Sue me lah."

"I am too broke to be suing anybody."

"Even me?"

"Especially you."

Snorting with laughter, I push open the door to the classroom Jon told me about—and my face falls.

RJ is in the room.

She is perched on top of the teacher's desk with her legs propped up on a table as she talks to Jon and Logan sitting opposite her. Her skirt is hiked up such that almost all of her thighs are showing—her strong, muscular thighs. My heart skips a beat before returning with a vengeance, thrashing about violently.

I turn on my heels. Emma and Adrian are both already inside and have closed the door behind them. When they spot the other three people in the classroom, Emma is slightly confused while Adrian raises his eyebrows.

"We should go," I say quickly.

"Chloe, wait!" RJ calls, hopping down from the desk. "I just want to talk."

She just wants to talk? She was the one who blocked me first! Anger rises in me and I spin around to face her.

"Is there even a remedial lesson?" I snap.

Jon and Logan move aside like the Red Sea, letting RJ walk towards me hesitantly.

"There is," she mutters. "It's just... in thirty minutes and... in another room."

"Is it even compulsory?"

"No..."

"So you lied to me?"

"Chloe, I just wanted to—"

"Don't tell me you just want to talk!" I cut her off. I can feel every pair of eyes in this room staring at me, drilling holes into my face, but I don't care. I can't let RJ play with my emotions like this again, I just can't. "Is this some kind of game you're playing? I've been trying to talk to you all last week, but you blocked me. And then you avoid me everywhere in school, like, what? You don't think I'm cool enough to be seen with you?"

"What? No! Why would you think that—"

"Why would I not think that? You're only nice to me when we're alone! You talk so much about wanting to be with me, about wanting to be my girlfriend, but then the moment we are in school, it's like I don't even exist! I changed my job for you leh, and I... I even let you take my... Argh, I can't believe it! And now you're ignoring me, and dating other people, and then using their phone to call me? What, am I just a toy you're embarrassed to be seen publicly with?"

I am shouting my lungs out at RJ, and she looks as though she is slapped across the face by my every word.

"Chloe, I—"

"I don't want to hear any of your stupid excuses lah! Not after you just abandoned me."

RJ is now standing right in front of me, her face contorted with guilt. Just seeing her so up close sends my mind into a spiral and I falter back a step.

"Chloe, please, hear me out," she pleads as she reaches her hand out. "I was genuinely trying to—"

Adrian steps between us, slapping RJ's hand away. "Don't you dare touch her lah. Haven't you done enough to hurt her already?"

Emma's hands wrap around my shoulders as well. "I'm not sure what happened but I agree!"

I tighten my hand around Emma's and give her an appreciative smile.

"Hurt her?" RJ barks. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You know what I'm talking about," Adrian says adamantly.

"No, I don't, and you clearly don't know shit either. Move!"

Despite the fierceness in RJ's eyes, Adrian remains an unrelenting wall between us. "Leave her alone lah. Go away."

"You get the fuck away!" RJ lunges towards him, seizing him by his collar and shoving him to the side.

And the classroom erupts into chaos.

Logan is the first to react.

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"Yo, yo, yo, stop that!" he shouts as he bounds across the room and yanks RJ away from us. RJ tries to struggle, but Logan is much stronger than her and he easily drags her all the way to the other side of the classroom.

I ignore the screaming match that ensues between RJ and Jon as Emma and I rush over to Adrian. RJ pushed him with so much force that he is now crumpled on the ground next to the wall.

"Oh my god, Adrian, are you okay?" Emma asks, sounding as though she is about to cry.

"I'm fine lah..." Adrian mumbles, but I can tell he is traumatized.

Emma helps him up while I adjust his tilted glasses. He grunts his appreciation and rubs the back of his head. Wincing, he adds, "I think I'm fine. I hope I didn't get, like, a concussion sia..."

As Emma continues to fuss over him, fixing his collar and smoothing his clothes, blood boils inside me. I cannot believe RJ pushed Adrian so hard. That was unforgivable. Everything she's done, to Adrian, to me, is unforgivable.

Clenching my teeth, I turn back to RJ, ready to yell at her again—but my heart drops at the scene.

RJ is crying.

Her body is slouched against Logan's, lurching as she sniffs.

My anger dissolves into shock and pain. RJ is the last person on Earth I'd imagine crying. I have never seen her look this... depressed. Helpless.

What happened? The last thing I remembered was RJ and Jon screaming at each other, but I wasn't sure what they were screaming about.

"Calm the fuck down lah, RJ!" Jon commands. He lifts her head up with both hands as though it is going to roll onto the ground any minute. "Clear your fucking head!"

"I fucked up, Jon, I fucked it all up," RJ sobs. Her every word, soft as they are, pierces through my heart like a dagger.

"So? Go fix it lah!"

"How? She hates me now, Jon."

"Just calm the fuck down first, can?"

Their exchange freezes the insides of my gut. I was so consumed in my own hurt that I rebuffed every attempt RJ made to talk to me. I pushed her away, like she did to me.

"Calm down and talk to her, 'kay?" Jon says, dropping his hands—RJ's head drops too. He walks to me. "Hey." He glances at Adrian. "I apologize for her. You okay, Adrian?"

Adrian gives him a meek nod. Jon lets out a breath of relief and then looks at me. "Chloe, can you please go talk to her? I know you're upset and she's in the wrong for getting violent, but she's been feeling like shit recently. I think you two need to talk it out."

No longer enraged, I agree with a nod. Logan pulls away from RJ and we exchange places—RJ and I at one end of the classroom, everyone else at the other end.

"Hey, RJ," I mutter. It pains me to look at a tear-stricken RJ, so I keep my head lowered.

It takes her a while to be able to speak properly again. When she does, her voice is strained. "Chloe, I'm... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you like this. I didn't want to avoid you lah."

"So... why are you avoiding me then?"

"Because..." She wipes her face with her sleeves and lets out an exasperated sigh. "Because my mother is a control freak lah. She is checking my phone, she has my chauffeur picking me up everywhere I go, and I am sure she has eyes in the school to keep watch on me. I don't know who else is going to run to her and ruin my fucking life yet again lah. And if she finds out about you, I don't know what she'll do. And I really don't want anything more to happen. I'm already in so much shit lah..."

Her mother. I've never met her, but she always seems to be the cause of all of RJ's problems.

"What- What kind of shit?" I ask with a whisper.

"She's fucking arranging a date for me every weekend lah." She sees the way I flinch at the word 'date', and quickly adds, "I don't give a shit about the stupid dates, Chloe. I want to be with you. But my mother is controlling as fuck, and I swear if Singapore was kinder to arranged marriages, she would fucking do it lah."

My heart sinks. "That's terrible. Why is she doing that?"

"Family image. Company politics. Lame shit like that lah. I know I should've told you about all this earlier, Chloe, but when I tried to call you using a spare phone, you... uh, hung up on me."

"Oh, yeah..." I take out my phone and open the Contacts app. The unknown number from last Saturday is still at the top of my recent call history. "Sorry, RJ, I... I thought..."

"It's okay. Can you... unblock the number, please? I miss talking to you."

I nod. It is as easy unblocking the number as blocking it was. Tears blur my vision. I have been so upset that I let my assumptions take over my thoughts. But all this time, RJ has been suffering in silence. She never actually abandoned me.

"I'm sorry, RJ," I say again. "I... I didn't know."

"Don't apologize, it's all my fault lah. If you hate me now, I will understand. But... let me help you, at least. Please. Let me share your burden."

RJ takes out an envelope from her pocket. Frowning, I pocket my phone and take the packet. It's heavy, a lot heavier than that envelope of tip money at Tropic Falls. Ever since telling her off about that, RJ has not given me another large tip like that again.

"RJ," I whisper exasperatedly, "why are you giving me so much money again?"

"I earned it to help your mother. To help you. Let me share your burden. I'm hiring you to come to my remedial lessons, okay?" She takes a hesitant step closer toward me. "Please, Chloe, let me buy your time to take a few shifts off and come to my remedial lessons. Let me help you lah, Chloe."

I lower my head and clutch the envelope to my chest. The tears in my eyes are streaming down my face. I don't know what to say. Once again, RJ is putting my emotions on the craziest roller coaster in the world.

"You idiot," I choke. "Why are you doing this lah?"

My heart is melted into a puddle by the time RJ grabs one of my hands and holds it between hers. "Because I miss you mah," she says, her voice as gentle as her caress on my palms. "And this is the only way I can think of to spend time together without anyone suspecting anything. I want to help you, and also be with you, Chloe. I still want to be your girlfriend, no matter how difficult it will be, no matter how secretive we need to be. So, can I buy your time, Chloe? Come to remedial lessons?"

She plants a soft kiss on my knuckles. "Please, with a cherry on top?"

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