Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Deal with The Devil

"Why does it hurt?"

Romantic relationships, Sibling relationships, Parental relationships…

These three are but a few examples of relationships humans can have. People can have similar relationships with each other.

Yet, every single relationship formed between two or more people is exceedingly unique in its own way while still maintaining similarity to others.

But… Why do these things called "relationships" exist to begin with?

It's because we don't want to be alone. No one existing on this earth willingly wants to be alone.

Humans are social creatures.

For many people, these relationships give meaning to their lives… letting them experience a bright and happy life with little to no suffering.

That was how it always went for normal people whose life didn't go off the rails. 

There are many whose suffering is caused by said relationships and interactions with other humans, leading them to eventually end their own lives because they thought their life had no meaning.

There was no bright person to feed them sweetness, no one to support them, no one to help them, putting them in a state of suffering. 

It was bitter poison to them, so they only took measures they thought appropriate and disappeared from the world.

Of course, there are those who healed as at some point in their lives, they found a reason to live by.

 

I considered it more than a few times. 

I suffer from toxic relationships with my parents, former friends, and many others. I thought I needed to end my own life as well.

Because there's no use in staying alive if my life is like this.

Nothing bright about my life, whether it's the past, present, or future.

I'm both the poison and the poisoned.

An existence that continues to hurt people as long as I try to be happy. 

If can't I be happy without hurting people, then what's the point?  

Or at least, that was what I thought.

***

"Hey, Iven, do you want to come have lunch with us?" A girl with shoulder-length black hair tied into a wide ponytail held up with a black banana hair clip, one gold hair clip on the side, black eyes, pale lips, and smooth porcelain skin wearing a bluish-polo shirt and a waist-length black skirt for a school uniform.

"Huh? Uhm… sure," I nervously replied.

The girl in front of me was my cousin, Alisa.

"Great, then just go put your stuff back into your locker and I'll meet you right there," Alisa pointed out the door with a bubbly smile.

"…Got it," I added.

"See you later then," Alisa cheerfully tapped me on the back several times.

She then left the classroom while I quietly left, following behind her, and went straight for my locker.

I, Iven Arawi, had transferred to this school and was halfway through my first day here.

A month ago, I moved to another country because I had no choice but to follow my parents since they would start working here and add to the fact that most of our family's relatives were based here.

I was slightly conflicted about permanently moving to another country, but I didn't resist and followed them. It was challenging to adjust to a new environment, but I somehow managed.

I only met Alisa a couple of weeks ago when she visited my new home. Still, I didn't get to talk to her that much as she spoke and played around with my other cousins, who visited while I stayed in my room waiting for the storm to pass.

"Sit here, Iven," Alisa said as she tapped on the spot next to her, urging me to sit on the floor.

I meekly nodded and sat down.

During the entire lunch break, Alisa and a bunch of her friends played cards. Still, I didn't mind since I had already eaten my lunch during recess.

Once Lunch break had ended, I went back to my locker, grabbed my stuff for the last period, and then headed to said class.

After that day ended, I didn't think much of it, but that would be the only time Alisa actively invited me.

I wholly adjusted and blended into the school as a loner in the following four weeks.

The first week, plenty of people in my class kept inviting me to play soccer, hang out, and so I indulged in their requests since I couldn't possibly refuse.

It was fun, but in the second week, it died out, leaving me alone outside of classes in school. Of course, I felt it was going to end like this.

After all, everyone already had their own friend groups and cliques, so there wasn't any room for me to squeeze in.

So I spent my lunch breaks walking laps around the entire school campus, thinking that it'd be better to use the free time to exercise instead of sitting alone, waiting for lunch break to end.

During these walks of mine, I'd subconsciously look for Alisa within the crowd of students. I didn't know why I'd do that, but it at least gave me something to do while walking.

I did it every time I went on one of these walks. Once I spot Alisa, my train of thought goes towards thinking how bright she was or how it'd feel if Alisa invited me to join them again if she notices me walking by.

I was lonely, I admit it.

I wanted someone to talk to. I wanted someone to hang out with. I wanted someone I could trust without being hurt.

My desires are very selfish.

B̴͈͖̝̏ṷ̷̟̎̔̿ť̴̙̉̈́̈ ̴̹̪͆͑͘I̴̗̰̐ ̶̮̉c̸̨̩͎̍́ͅŏ̷̖̅̐̀u̸͈͘͝l̵̢̲͈̀ḏ̷̮̠̺̋̿̽̃n̸̨͇̜̍’̵͈̊͒̈t̷̟̲̓̍̿̽ ̷̡̛̖̂͋͜͠a̷͖͓͖͋f̴̢̛̠͔̎̅͝f̴͎͊ͅơ̸̳̮͔͎̏̋́r̸͓̐̄́͜d̵͕̉͛͌ ̶̫͉̠̺̈́̋̈t̸̲̣͉̉̏o̸̧̺̔͆̾ ̷̧̳͔̉b̶̳̈́̈́̅́ē̸̪̰͎ ̶̨͕̱͒ŝ̶̙̃̈́̾ë̴͍̬̻́ĺ̴̟̩̳̗f̶̛͙̜ḯ̸͓̱͔s̷͎͉̜̫̓̑̎h̶̝͔̻̘̑.̵̡͕̻̜͗͠ ̵̫̔̈́̌̈́

Ĭ̵̙͖̞̌̀͜ ̸̛̈́ͅd̸̝̼͕̳̔̀̍̍ȏ̸̫͕͒̓͜͠ņ̴͋̎͜'̴̥̤͈́̐̀ṯ̵̛̜̺̿̀̿ ̶͈̂̉͒w̴̛̟̘̗̒à̷͇̺n̶͔̤̊́ţ̸̜̖̝͋ ̵̙̩͓̂t̴̞̟̄͠o̶̺̝̲͗ ̷̤́͛h̷̞̮̰͋ú̴̻̯͉͒͂̕͜r̷̹̠͚̈́͛͝͝ṭ̴̬̽͘ ̶̧͙͛a̷̺̱͓̮̐͊̒͠n̴̯̹͋͑̈́ÿ̶̳̟̞́͆͘ö̵̹ń̸̨̓̃̀e̶̬͔̞͑ ̴̞̲̇̂͋̀ạ̷̛̒n̷̹̥̜͒̚͝y̶̥͆̀͠m̶̡͗̎͆̃ǫ̶͊r̴̝̓̕ͅe̴͓͆.̸͙̥̖͌͊̇̑

That's why I'm fine staying like this and not bothering anyone else.

***

But for the third and second weeks, I tried forcing myself into a friend group within my class, and the result was.

"You know, you don't have to force yourself to be with us, go be with other people," A boy named Dani said as he glanced at me while we walked.

"Oh, okay…" I replied as somewhere in my heart, I started to feel a sense of weight, crushing my heart into guilt.

I know when I'm not wanted, so from that day on, I avoided starting any and all interaction with Dani's friend group outside of class and went back to my ways of walking around school.

Selfishness cannot be avoided as it is a part of our DNA; it's what human civilization is built upon.

Every time I glance at Alisa's bright figure from afar, I find myself thinking about what it would be like to be in a forbidden relationship with her.

I don't know much about her yet, seeing as I've only known her for a couple of months, but I feel like she's a person who can understand me.

A person who can understand what I'm feeling.

But that's impossible. There's no way I could do that in real life.

If I was the main character of a novel, I'd go for it, but this is reality, not fiction.

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There's a fine line between the two; I will not cross it.

As time passed, that train of thought became stronger.

Eventually, one day during lunch break, as I watched Alisa from afar, I decided to sit next to her, seeing as she was alone, making this a perfect chance to talk to her.

But as I made my way towards her, one of her friends sat down right beside her.

Ah.

I thought as I slumped my shoulders in disappointment but kept going towards her. Turning back in the middle of a soccer field would look plain suspicious, or at least I thought it would be.

I sat down on the stone pavement, a few spaces beside Alisa.

As Alisa talked to her friend, I took quick glances at her while pretending to watch the people play basketball on the basketball court.

Ah… I hope Alisa talks to me.

I thought stupidly and optimistically, as it never happened.

Alisa and her friend got up and walked away, leaving me dumb, thinking why it would work in the first place.

After that day, I decided to not approach her and be content with watching.

A̵̰͒h̶̫̖̠͂̚…̸̡̛͎̅̿̚ ̵̩̲͍̊̿͗w̶̬̥͎̬͆h̷̞͚͇̝͂͒̆̏ÿ̴̰̲͜͜…̶̹̳̤͋ ̶̹̓a̴̺͖̅m̶͕̄̆̍ ̷͙̏Ȋ̸̧͙̫͇̌͒͝ ̶̺̞͆́͝l̷̬̇̔̐i̶̧̝͇̖̓͆̋͠k̷̠̓͑e̵̫̽̀̀̚ ̷̲̱͋t̶̹͇͆̈̋̓h̶͖̿̍ï̵̝̲̪̈́͜s̸̞̪͖̞͛̔͝?̸͖̭̒̐̃̈ ̶̜̾̐

***

One day, four weeks after transferring to this new school.

As I was walking home, walking through the small park connecting the streets where my school and house are.

"Huh?" It had suddenly turned very dark as if the day had been instantly switched to night. I stopped my movement as I looked around, confused at what had just happened.

The rocky concrete pavement beneath my feet had been replaced with smooth stone bricks; instead of light green scenery to my right and the houses to my left, there was a dark empty space.

I was no longer in the tiny park I always used as a shortcut to get home, but I was now on a floating platform in the midst of what seemed like outer space.

I could still breathe, though.

A few meters before me, a dark goo-like substance had spilled out from the concrete pathway forming a puddle.

"Eh?" I uttered in confusion as I watched.

Suddenly, a hand started to climb up the puddle, an arm. Eventually, a person appeared from beneath the pool of goo.

"I've been searching for you… Welcome to my domain, human." A voice sweet as honey had been heard. "I am Lilith, a Demon King of the Qlipthoth Tree."

The person who called herself Lilith was a tall girl with straight, long red hair as if it was a river of blood, deep crimson eyes, and pale skin.

Lilith was wearing a black crystal-like long skirt with the upper half of her body completely exposing her smooth pale skin except for the black belt with a singular butterfly-like thing in the middle of her modest chest and a Fascinator on her head.

Her outfit was reminiscent of that of a mourning dress.

"…Lilith? …a Demon king…?" I repeated some of her words while trying to comprehend the situation in front of me.

"Yes, tell me… what is your name?" Lilith replied.

"It's Iven," I answered, not knowing what else to do.

My brain was at a complete stop, incapable of knowing what to think and what train of thought to run in this situation.

"I see… Iven, what is it that you desire?"

"I… want to be happy."

What am I doing? It's like my mouth is moving on my own…!

"I want to be loved without any pain; I want to be happy in life…!"

My mouth was running off on its own, its as if there is a compelling force that is forcing it to move. 

"Hm… it is as I thought, your desire is unique but very common."

"What are you?" I asked as I noticed I was in control of my mouth again.

"I told you, didn't I? I'm a Demon King, an existence that you humans would consider fictional and terrifying," Lilith responded. "And I have come to grant your request of becoming happy and becoming loved without any hostility."

"What are you-"

"No need for the extra questions; just answer me this…." Lilith interjected, "Do you want me to grant your request…?"

"Ah, uh…" I was stunted, "Haah… I… becoming loved and happy, if there was a way then I want to make it reality of course, but it's impossible for me."

As Lilith continued to speak, it feels like my emotions, my memories, and my everything were being intently pulled up to the surface. 

The feelings I wanted to hide, the memories I wanted to bury, the desires that needed to be kept secret. 

It was as if Lilith had completely taken hold of them and started to pull it out of me. 

"Why do you say that it's impossible?"

"Because, I also don't want hurt to anyone, to be happy is also to be selfish, so that's why it's impossible."

"Hm… it looks like you are similar to him but if I were to say that you can be happy without being too selfish, without guilt, then would you believe me?"

"If you are the devil, then I would…."

"If I am the devil… hm, so do you want to? I'm a Demon King, an existence synonymous with the devil, if that is your reason to believe then here I am."

"I'm not stupid, tell me, what do I have to do if I accept?"

"Don't worry about that, if you accepted here and now, I'll give you a trial period of that granted request, I will tell you the price that is to be paid after you have experienced it to give you and me a fair experience, so, will you?"

As soon as Lilith ended her sentence, it felt like my thoughts had started to flow again.

With my mind in a confused state, I tried to consider everything about it, everything of what the mysterious entity in front of me had said. 

A devil... a demon king, and this odd place where I stand on. 

There's no possible way that this exists in reality, or at least I wanted to think that. 

I wanted to run away and say this is all a dream. 

I don't want to deal with it. 

But somewhere inside me is telling me that it's all real and there's nowhere to hide. 

Fine, it's not like I have anything to lose anyways… I'll gladly sell my soul to the devil.

"Fine, I'll accept."  

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