Don’t Get It Tangled!

Chapter 12: Scene 12 – Rookie Move


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Venus walked toward the first target's house, holding Gaia's hand. "You've only fought simulated Malice up until now. If things weren't so urgent, we would have started you off with something easier, but you're going to have to jump into the deep end with me, alright?" Venus flashed the rookie a smile. There was something adorable about such a mousey girl trying her best to follow along.

Venus stopped just outside the porch. "What's the first step of Malice extermination?" Venus glanced behind herself, making sure their six was clear, before leaning against a porch column.

"Never turn your back on a Malice?" Gaia suggested. Venus was already breaking the rules, and they had just started to hunt. Well, she'd be sure to follow the book strictly. Mystery Maid wrote it; the words inside were literally gospel, even if they were... obsequious. Round-about. You'd be asking more questions than you answered by opening up a chapter.

"I'll be fine, hon! Just answer the question," Venus snickered.

"Well, the first step of Malice Extermination is scouting. Knowing what your enemy is capable of means no surprises. You've already done that, back at the restaurant." Gaia adjusted her round glasses, reciting what she'd read verbatim.

"Good answer! We try our best to never engage with Malice in the first place." Venus grinned, leaving Gaia to blink.

"What?" That went against all the rules and preparations. "But what about saving innocents?" Gaia wasn't about to put others at risk by leaving the Malice to fester.

"Oh, honey. Nobody is innocent, least of which you humans. We do our best, but our own lives come first." Venus puts her hand on her chest. "Do you know why we avoid engaging Malice?"

"Well, they serve as our counterparts. They're incredibly lethal and could pose a real threat to anyone caught in their domain." Gaia folded her arms. "Including innocent lives."

"Exactly. A Malice wants nothing more than for you to face it inside its domain and obey the rules it sets for you. Once you're playing by the rules, you're an easy snack." Venus straightened out and moved away from the column of the porch.

"So your first lesson in killing Malice is controlled demolition. Usually, Mars is our go-to demolitionist, but a little birdie told me you might have expertise on this subject." Venus gestured to the porch, smiling all the way.

Gaia adjusted her glasses, data streaming in. "You demolish buildings? But what if they're historic? For Divine's sake, the one in front of us is designed by Frank Lloyd Wright."

"Honey, we're pre-historic. Starkeepers have existed far longer than humankind has." Venus folded her arms. "Nobody's going to blink an eye if an Earth building goes missing, Lloyd or not. The Malice probably exists because of this Lloyd fellow. We can investigate this Lloyd and get to the bottom of his nefarious deeds, but I'm going to need you to punch this house, alright?"

Gaia rubbed her forehead. Aliens. They were hard to deal with at the best of times; she had no idea why they wanted a human to work alongside them if they didn't want to listen to her. Maybe out of a sense of obligation, but she still felt oppressed by the organization's structure. It was aliens all the way down, making decisions for Earth as if they knew what was best.

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She doubted the claim that they were some ancient and venerable society, even now. If they'd been there for the benefit of Earth, how had it gotten to this point? Everything seemed terrible all the time. According to Mars, they didn't even have their own technology department until Dr. Bright came along. They were using Velvet Machines alongside fax machines. Really! Fax machines! Nobody even takes faxes anymore! Just send an email and save everyone the trouble!

In any case, the stars had chosen her, so it was time to fulfill her destiny. Gaia didn't want to disappoint Venus. Gaia took a deep breath, apologizing to the historical architecture, and plunged her hands into the earth. Her fists sank wrist-deep. When she removed them from the ground, they were covered in earthy gauntlets that began to solidify and harden, cracks of molten magma running under the surface as the brick was seared in place.

Taking a deep breath to let her chi flow, Gaia stepped forward and twisted her ankle. She stomped the earth beneath her, and a sizable chunk of dirt was knocked into the air. With a practiced palm strike, she launched the clod of soil at the house, smashing windows and furniture. The projectile had opened a hole in their living room wall and crashed through the other side.

"Ooh, clean hit. Do that again, but this time aim for the second floor, 13 or so degrees to the left?" Venus reached in from behind Gaia, repositioning her body and holding her waist. The rookie let out a little squeak, followed by a sneeze. It felt wrong to destroy a cultural landmark, but she'd get over the guilt. Just as well, something was irritating her nose right now and she'd really like her hands back.

"Okay, I'll give it another try!" Gaia brought forth another earthen projectile, following the alien's movements behind her.

"You're doing such a good job. You're a good girl, aren't you?" Venus cooed, and the next strike went haywire.

Gaia coughed and sputtered, her fist slamming the dirt back into the ground instead of the second floor as she'd hoped. "I thought we agreed I wasn't a dog!" 

"Oh, I thought some positive affirmation would get a better result. I'll have to remember your preferences." Venus played it off, taking a deep sniff from Gaia's neck. Gaia, for her part, sneezed again.

"Operational procedure would have me remind you that drinking your fellow Nebulossoms is to be done off the clock." Gaia tried to find the words to ward her coworker away. Next to her neck was already in a perilous position for a blood-drinking species to take.

"No fun. We were so close." Venus let out a pout, breathing on Gaia's neck. "Is that a promise to let me drink after?"

"I wasn't volunteering!" Gaia shouted, launching a wave of stone directly into the house opposite. "Oops." Shingles drooped from the hole she'd created in the structure, falling onto a puddle of tar and mulch on the second floor.

"Oh, you killed the Malice! Good job. Now we're off the clock, right?" Venus pouted adorably, no doubt begging for some of her blood. It took all of Gaia's effort to remind her they still had many more Malice to deal with that morning.


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