Chapter 15: Chapter 13

"Welcome home," Wendy said when Johan entered the apartment.

"Hi. Enjoying yourself?"

"Yeah. I'm just sitting on the couch, watching videos on my phone. Want to join?"

"No, I'm good, but I've had a rough day today. I'm heading to my room."

"Rough day? What happened?"

"The usual. Just studying too much."

"You should really take it easy. Too much studying can't be good for your mental health."

Johan laughs, "Yeah, I bet. Well, I'll see you later." Johan walks past the couch and straight to his room.

Once the door closed, "What was that!? How can he be so calm after telling Margaret every-" He quickly covered his mouth and exhaled. "Calm down, Johan. You don't want Wendy to hear you. But I can't believe Wendy told Margaret. Whatever happened to confidentiality?" He began to pace around the room. "Never mind Wendy, what about what Margaret said. Was that really a confession on my part? I was just making small talk. I just wanted to share a bit of trivia with Lucy. At least... that's what I think I was doing." He then sat on his bed. "That's just Margaret's opinion. I mean, there's a million ways to interpret how a scenario like that would play out." He fell back and laid on his bed. "Something else must have happened to keep Lucy from contacting me, I'm certain of it. But there was a reason why I gave Margaret that hyperbolic scenario, and she didn't even have to think about it for long before she gave me that answer. Could Lucy have gotten curious about reincarnation and come to the same conclusion? I mean, she sounds smart by the way she speaks. Maybe she's interested in learning about random topics like me. Maybe she got curious to learn more about reincarnation and looked it up. Maybe, if she did all that, she put two and two together and..."

With a bewildered look on his face, he jumped out of the bed. "Something else must have happened. That has to be it. We continued to chat like we always did. There was nothing out of the ordinary. Something else must have happened. Maybe she had to move away? But she would have told me if that was the case. Even if she took a plane, she should've landed a long time ago. Something must be restricting her, keeping her from responding to my messages. Something big has caused her to lose her ability to communicate. Something... dire...." A sudden chill transmits throughout his body. "Could it be that she was in something perilous? Did she fall off a flight of stairs or got involved in a car accident? Or maybe she got kidnapped? But if such a thing happened, it would probably be in the news."

He pulled out his phone and opened Chrome but before he could type anything, "What am I doing? I don't even know her. I mean, this is all conjecture at this point. And there's no guarantee there would be any news about the incident. It could be one of those unreported events. Even if it was, I don't know her personally. I'll probably come off as a stalker looking up info on some random woman I only talked to online. I don't even know what she looks like." He paused as his thoughts started processing all this information and, as before, showing him the image that he felt he was close to discovering. "I could know what she looks like," he whispered. "I really am lonely, aren't I? Here I am, concerned about some person I never met. But Lucy shares the same dreams I've been having. And the girl in my dreams, Lucy recalls them from her point of view. And the man in my dreams, she recounts the actions he took when they were together. The girl in my dreams... The girl, that I have fallen in love with... The girl that I can never have near me ever... Reincarnation... But Lucy is gone. She won't respond to my messages. Something happened and I have a feeling I'm at fault. I wanted to believe, truly believe, that the love of my life was-"

The vibration from his phone makes him jolt in place. A notification awaited him once he pulled out his phone. After a few moments of collecting himself, he reads the name he's been dying to show up.

He opens up Google Chat expecting an illusion. What he found was Lucy with her status as offline with a message left waiting for him. His eyes darted left and right, reading each word.

“What is this?”

"So, Lucy, the teacher tells me you are not cooperating in class," the Principal said. "Mind explaining what is going on?"

"I don't know what you are talking about," Lucy said nervously. "I do my homework and the assignments given."

"But according to their accounts, you haven't been participating in class."

"I just told you I do all my work."

"You also stopped raising your hand to answer questions, you refuse to work in groups claiming you can do the work alone, they even went as far as to say you are avoiding eye contact with anyone."

"That's not true."

"I would be convinced of that statement if you actually looked at me when you said it."

Lucy's eyes darted everywhere but refused to look straight forward at the Principal. "I'm still getting used to the place."

"Lucy, do you need to see the school psychiatrist?"

"No. I'm fine."

"I think you better speak to them."

"No, really, I'm fine," Lucy said finally facing the Principal.

"Listen, if you keep this up, I'll have to notify your mother about this."

The Principal could see Lucy fidgeting on her seat, her eyes returning to dart from one place to another. "Okay, fine," she said, "I guess I have been uncooperative. It's just that, you know, I just moved here and I haven't gotten used to it."

"But the teachers had no complaints about you in the first few weeks. In fact, they complimented you on being a model student."

"I guess the truth came out and I'm done with this facade." Lucy's voice was cracking more than usual and her breathing was now becoming obvious. She faced the Principal once more. "If I promise to better myself and try to get adjusted, can you please let this slide? I promise this is just a small phase I'm going through. You know, I'm in a strange place and am trying to get used to it and... stuff."

With a look of uncertainty, the Principal said, "Well, this is the first time you've been sent here, and you've been a good student so far. I guess you can consider this a wake-up call. If you are having problems, then it's best if you speak to the psychiatrist."

"Yeah, I'll keep that in mind. Can I go now?"

"Let me write you a note and then you may be excused."

With the Principal's note in her hand, she exits the office.

During class, during recess, and even after school, there was no hiding it, not even to her peers and teachers. There was no need for any wake-up call. She wasn't oblivious. She knew she was avoiding contact with anyone, even refusing to speak to her teachers. When the few girls that offered their friendship she would respectfully decline. Now she outright walked passed them without a single word. Her free time during recess and lunch was now spent at the library where the chances of being bothered were lessened. Even on the bus with strangers all around her who just minded their own business, she would wait for an hour or two until a bus that was practically empty would arrive. Only her home would provide her with the respite she desired as it was guaranteed to be empty. But Lucy knew this routine could not last forever. As she sat alone in her room in front of her computer, she slams the keyboard, pushes her desk with her foot where the chair reclines against the bed and she rolls herself on top of it before the chair topples to the ground.

"What is wrong with me? Why do I feel like this? I don't like boys. I don't think I like girls either. I don't like anyone. I don't even know him." She gets off the chair and walks circles around her room. "Why are you in my head? Who are you? What are you? A monster? Are you a demon? Do demons really exist? Do I need to go to church and have them examine me? Maybe I do." As she paced around her room, she kicked her backpack that was slumped on the floor causing her phone to slip out. There was no external reaction from her but internally, she was in panic mode looking at the infernal device and calmly stuffed it under her mattress. "But it's still there. Why do I even have a phone? Nobody calls me. I don't have any friends. I have no reason to call anyone."

She clasped her hands, gripping each one tightly. No matter how hard she struggled, the tears escaped her eyes as she dropped herself onto the bed and buried her head into a pillow.

"This is all Jenny's fault. She put those stupid thoughts in my head." A momentary pause before, "No, I can't blame her. I asked her for her opinion. I shouldn't have said anything in the first place. But... I want to talk to someone so much. Why can't I have normal parents like everyone else?" Her sorrow, her dismal mindset, and the emotional roller coaster she was going through was now turning into fire. "This isn't right. If I can't count on my parents, who can I trust?"

She got up from the bed, lifted the mattress, and pulled out the phone. She opened the contact list and found her father's number. "No more excuses. I got to tell someone."

After a few moments of dialing his number, "What is it?"

"Dad... I mean, Sir."

"Yes?"

"I need to talk to you."

"Very well. I'm available between 2:00 pm and 2:05 pm..."

"No, Dad, I need to... Sir, I need to talk to you right now."

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"Lucy, you know you have to set an appointment with me."

"But this is an emergency."

"Emergency? What happened?"

"Well... actually... it's kind of embarrassing..."

"Lucy, why are you wasting my time? I'm a very busy person, you know. I run an entire company. I don't have time for games."

Lucy gripped her phone so tight she thought she was going to crush it. After taking a deep breath, "Dad, I may like a boy."

"What?"

"There's a boy I like but... I'm afraid of letting him know."

"Lucy, why are you being stupid?"

"What!?"

"Teenage rubbish. I'm not in the mood to listen to your hormonally-charged tirades. That's what your useless mother is for. You might as well tell that witch about this because I'm all about business. Call me back when you have something actually important to tell me," he said before hanging up.

It was a full minute of Lucy being completely stunned before she closed her mouth. With some vigor left in her, she scrolled upward to see her mother's number.

"Hello?"

"Mom?"

"Huh?"

"Mom, it's Lucy."

"Oh. Yeah... okay. What do you want?"

"When are you coming home?"

"I don't know. Like, maybe, seven in the morning, ha ha ha." A crowd of laughter was heard through the phone's speakers.

"Mom, I would really like to talk to you. You know, have a mother-daughter talk."

"Ew. That doesn't sound right."

"In any case, can we talk?"

"Not right now. I'm busy. I got no time." The music blaring through the phone was getting louder. "Oh, I love this song! Alright, who's first?"

"Mom, I really need to talk to you."

"You look good. How about it? You want to dance?" The mumbling of a male voice could be heard. "No way, I'm never the designated driver. If I come to the bar, I'm getting plastered every time." Even more mumbling before her mother answered. "Well you take me home. Your home! Ha ha ha! Woooo! Let's go!"

"Mom, are you still there?"

Her mother laughed and hollered from ecstasy before Lucy heard, "Why is my phone on? Oh, maybe it's one of the guys I gave my number to. Hello? Derek? Craig? Whose this? Huh? Lucy? I don't remember giving my phone to a girl. Then again, I'm all up for experimenting, I guess. So, how are you doing, baby?" Lucy ended the call and threw the phone at the wall.

She plops herself onto her bed and continues to sob. It was only a few seconds before a jingle was heard. With burning indignation, she gets up to pick up the phone and saw Jenny had sent her a message, "How'd it go?" which caused her to calm down.

She exhaled. "Oh, that's right. I asked for her number."

In her misery, angst, and confusion, the only image that relieved her of her emotional baggage appeared before her. The young, dashing, and thoughtful young man who would do anything for his beloved, even defy death itself, was smiling before her. Her heart was beating once more, causing her as much relief as it did guilt.

She taps Jenny's name and waits for her to pick up.

"So did you tell him?" Jenny asked enthusiastically. “Did you tell him you like him? Did you set up a time for the date? I'm dying to know!"

Lucy exhaled before saying, "Do you really think I should meet him?"

"Of course. You in love with him, aren't you?"

Feelings of longing and desire arose within her after hearing that word. "Love?"

"Yeah. You're in love with him, right? I saw your face turn red the last time I saw you. Don't deny it, you like him. Now it's time to ask him out on a date and be all lovey-dovey."

Lucy stood as still as the world around her. Not even the sound of a car passing by took her out of the space that she entered. The one where the youthful young man was reaching his hand out to her, welcoming her with that wonderful and inviting smile of his.

But before she decided to take his invitation, she wiped the tears from the phone's screen and replied, "What should I do?"

"So you haven't yet?"

"No. What should I do right now?"

"Text him. Text him and tell him to meet you on Saturday by the train station."

"Alright. I'll do it right now."

"Tell me every little detail later and I'll give you tips, okay?"

“Oh... sure...”

“Do it right now!” and Jenny hanged up.

When she closed the phone app, the Google Chat icon was waiting on the home screen. "How long has it been?" she asked herself. Memories of the past weeks appear before her. She recalled the smiles and laughter she had as she and Johan chatted away throughout the night. Memories so sweet that a tiny smile emerged before tapping the icon.

What awaited her within were messages from Johan. All of them inquiries about her whereabouts. Messages concerning her well-being. Her heart melted at that moment as she began to type.

Can we meet this Sunday at the train station?

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