Chapter 24: Chapter 23: Loss and Pain

Edited by: Waning_Crescents

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A jet of water hit the porcelain surface, steam climbed up into the room, leaving a dampness on the mirror on the wall. Sigal had his head tilted upward with his eyes closed, letting the water splash his face before it ran over his broad shoulders, along his muscular chest until it hit the floor. A thin stream of blood dribbled down from his right arm, merging with the liquid and vanished as soon as it seeped into the drain. Sigal’s grazed gunshot wound from the other day still needed time to heal and because he overexerted himself in the course of events, it reopened a little bit again, yet he paid it no heed.

His mind solely revolved around Cal’s condition and how it came to be. He opened his eyes, bent his head slightly down, propping one hand on the wall. He stared at the tiles with darkness flickering in his eyes. I will find and kill you. You won’t ever lay a finger on him again. In his heart a raging volcano roared, wanting nothing more than to break free to send a certain someone to the depths of hell.

While he tried to contain this intense feeling, his other hand wandered down to the valve, turning off the water. He remained in that position for a few more minutes; strands of his hair stuck to his face while droplets of water trickled down from the tips. After he took a few deep breaths, he turned and exited the shower, grabbed a towel, rubbed himself dry and placed it over his hair.

From the corner of his eyes, he caught a glimpse of the blood-stained shirt which he had tossed on the floor; his heart sank. The blood wasn’t his but Cal’s, which stained Sigal’s clothes as he held and carried him. He grabbed it, stowed it into a basket before he got dressed and left the bathroom while he rubbed his hair with the towel, slumping down on the couch in the living room. Even though the exhaustion settled more and more in, he still refused to take a night's rest. Instead, he grabbed his laptop and started to write a detailed report for Vince. The more information he provided the more thoroughly they could execute their investigation after all.

However, even if the mind was willing, the body was not. Sigal’s eyelids grew heavier by the second, causing him to blink and shake his head a few times to stay focused, but with a body that was at its limit, nothing would work to keep it going. Only a few minutes later he plummeted backwards onto the couch, entering a dreadful dreamscape.

 

***

A thick layer of eerie fog laid like a cloak over the area, the moon timidly hiding behind the clouds, wrapping the entire area in pitch black darkness. An icy wind traveled through the empty streets while vile laughter filled the air.

Sigal ran around this ghostly district, distress visible in his eyes, while he pointed his gun forward.

‘You are too late. Too late!!’

These words came from an unknown source, infiltrating Sigal’s mind, pounding vividly against his scalp.

Sigal shook his head and pressed onward as a brimming light illuminated a building at the end of the street. Sigal stopped in his tracks for a second before he gritted his teeth, dashing towards it.

‘What are you looking for?’ The voice giggled as if mocking him. ‘You are too late!’

Sigal paid it no attention, entering the place which was the familiar parking garage. The lights inside were lit up like before, yet it emitted a different aura. A thick scent of blood lingered in the air, a suffocating uneasiness erupting in Sigal’s heart.

‘Useless, useless.’ The voice repeated over and over again.

Sigal pressed on until he saw at the bottom layer of the building a young man with white hair, lying in a pool of blood.

His eyes widened; breath caught in his throat. “Cal!”

He hurried over, dropped to his knees and heaved him up. Cal’s eyes were half-open, his face deadly pale. From the corner of his mouth dripped blood as he feebly stared at Sigal. “W-Why didn’t…you…come sooner…why did you not help me?”

Unable to move Cal coughed a mouthful of blood while he laid in Sigal’s arms, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I…waited…”

“I am sorry. I am so sorry; I am here now. Everything will be fine. Hang on, please!”

“It’s too late…” Cal said in an almost inaudible voice. “Good…bye…” A haze formed over his pupils, his head dropping to the side. Blood gushed from his nose and ears, the life fading from his body.

“No!!” Sigal yelled, panic-stricken. “Don’t give up! Don’t leave! Cal, wake up!!!”

‘You can’t protect anyone! Useless.’ That disturbing voice echoed again.

“You can’t die!” Sigal picked him up, trembling uncontrollably. “Please, fight!”

The next second a separate section went up in flames and amid that raging fire laid another young man, one hand outstretched into the investigator’s direction. Sigal froze, his chest tightened, and his head spun.

The young man mouthed something, but Sigal couldn’t hear it clearly.

 

***

 

Startled awake; Sigal jerked forward, his body drenched in sweat, panting heavily. He stared at his hands before his eyes wandered to either side of the room in confusion. He was still in the living room on the couch where he fell asleep the night before. A dream?

He hurriedly grabbed after his phone staring at the screen where no notifications showed up. He exhaled in relief; no messages or calls meant nothing unforeseen had happened while he was asleep. Although this was good news it also meant that Cal still didn’t wake up.

He let himself fall backwards into the cushion at the back of the couch and put one hand on his forehead, taking a few deep breaths. This nightmare rattled him to his inner core, events overlapping, exposing his repressed fears and emotions.

It took him a while until he somewhat calmed down, pushed the dream aside for now and concentrated on finishing the report before he went back to the hospital.

 

As soon as Sigal arrived, he looked for the doctor in charge of Cal’s treatment to get an update on his condition.

“How is it?” Sigal asked.

“Unchanged, but that is not necessarily bad.” The doctor replied. “His vital signs are improving and that is a good sign. That means his body is stabilizing.”

Sigal nodded.

Then the doctor glanced at his chart. “However, we found substances in his blood stream.”

“Substances?” Sigal frowned.

“Yeah, we are still unsure of all the components we discovered, but one of these we recognized.” The doctor paused for a moment but then continued, “We found components mixed with a high dosage of opioids. Usually, opioids are used to reduce pain, but in rare cases when overdosed it can have the opposite effect. And the amount we found in his bloodstream was more than concerning.”

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Sigal furrowed his brows, his heart throbbing as he listened.

“Meaning his sense of pain was raised to an unimaginable scale. Even—”

“That’s enough. I get it.” Sigal stopped him, barely able to compose himself. What he just heard was even worse than what he ever had imagined.

The doctor nodded in understanding. “For the other substances, they are more complex and newer. I will give an update as soon as I can find more about them.” Then he noticed the pain in the other’s eyes and added, “Don’t worry. Even in that large dose, the effect deteriorated a while ago and his pain receptors stabilized to normal.”

Sigal closed his eyes for a second, taking in everything he just got told, but then thanked the doctor for his time and went straight to Cal’s room where the two corps division members still took up their post. He exchanged a few words with them before he opened the door and entered.

He walked up, sitting down again on the chair beside Cal’s bed. The information he gained from the doctor lingered painfully in his heart, unable to find any words for a while.

He lowered his eyebrows, clenching his fists in frustration while he gazed at this young man’s sleeping, yet handsome, face. “Cal, I know I screwed up. I never meant for this to happen. I want you to know that I never wanted to believe that you betrayed us, I was wrong to jump the gun back there.”

Uncommon for Sigal, he just kept rambling in hope that his partner could hear him in this state, that at last his voice would reach him. “And I promise you, I won’t let that lunatic ever hurt you again. I—”

Sigal choked back the rest of his words as he spotted light movements from Cal’s eyelids. “Cal? Hey, can you hear me?”

In the next second, Cal’s eyes slowly opened, blinking in confusion. “Where…am I?”

Sigal’s eyelids twitched, his expression softening immediately. “You are in the hospital. Everything is fine now.”

“What happened?” Cal asked with a frail voice as he turned his head to his partner. “Did I screw up again?”

Sigal, who already pushed the button to inform the doctor, shook his head. “No. You didn’t.”

Before he could even say more, the doctor opened the door and walked in, sending him out to take a closer look at the patient.

 

Outside, Sigal let out a breath of relief, not thinking too much of Cal’s confusion just now. He just woke up after all and after everything he went through, being muddleheaded was a normal reaction.

He walked along the corridor until he reached the hospital’s yard, the sun beaming vividly. Sigal lifted his hand to block the irritating light as he walked out and settled down by a tree before he snatched his phone from his pocket, called Vince and updated him on Cal’s condition.

“Yeah, the doctor is with him right now. Any news on your end?”

After Vince received Sigal’s report, he had a better grasp on the overall situation, putting their focus on Axis and his men. Section 1 and 3 were working non-stop to find any leads, even the police received the relevant information to help in the search, yet their efforts didn’t bear any fruit.

“I see. Let me know as soon as you find anything,” Sigal said before he hung up.

 

Sometime later, the doctor stepped out of Cal’s room, taking Sigal aside. He gazed at the investigator as he reported to him that aside from the injuries Cal sustained, his physical condition was fine. The only concern laid in his mental state which seemed to have suffered the most.

“After asking him a sequence of questions, all indicated that he is experiencing memory loss,” the doctor explained, “He couldn’t answer any questions regarding his childhood. His first recollection starts from when he joined the Conciliators. From there he remembers everything until two days prior to the incident.”

Sigal froze. This was something he didn’t expect at all. The confusion from Cal before he brushed off as insignificant, rather normal. Never had he thought that this indicated that he forgot what happened.

Afterwards, the doctor explained further how this usually occurs. That it had something to do with experiencing a traumatic event and how the brain shuts that part off out of self-protection and so on. But Sigal only heard parts of it, thinking only about what that meant for Cal, how he was supposed to deal with that. He only came around as the doctor concluded, “In his case though, it can be either that or a combination with the drug components that caused him to lose parts here and other parts there. While losing specific events or periods can happen in a traumatic setting, it’s still rather rare in this form.”

Sigal furrowed his brows. “What does that mean?”

“It means we need to look more into how that drug works,” the doctor answered. “Regardless, I highly recommend not pushing any memories on him to avoid another traumatic episode. If he will recall them, then he needs to do that by himself.”

“You are saying, you can’t guarantee he will?”

“Unfortunately, no. Not as long as I am not sure what the cause of this is.” Then his expression got more serious. “But there is something else I need to talk to you about.”

Right as the doctor started to express another concern, a hubbub broke out inside Cal’s room, causing Sigal and the doctor to stop their conversation and rush over.

“What is going on?” Sigal asked one of the corps division members, who stood outside the door.

“Mr. Vaughn, he…” He pointed inside.

Cal had clasped the nurse’s wrists in a firm grip while he pushed her away from him.

“Mr. Vaughn…please calm down. This is necessary to check your vitals.” The woman tried to explain in a calm manner.

Like a wolf in sheep clothes, Cal panted, glaring at her in a mix of fury and panic, squeezing her hand, with which she held the needle, tighter, forcefully bending her wrist. No words seemed to reach the young man, causing the other member of the corps division to step forward to intervene, but right at this moment, Sigal pushed through, stepped behind Cal and seized both of his hands. “What are you doing?”

Sigal’s voice snapped Cal out of his daze, his eyes flickered for a second before he loosened his grip, slumping against his partner’s chest. He slightly raised his head, gazing at Sigal, tears visible at the corner of his eyes. “Please, d-don’t let them do that. No needle, please.”

Sigal’s eyes widened as he held Cal in his arms, who trembled all over. “I won’t. I promise.”

Cal relaxed at these words, but with his little energy spent, his body gave in, and he drifted off into a serene slumber.

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