Chapter 1: 1

Chapter 1 - I confessed.

 

I might be given a death sentence by the girl I liked... In this space currently full of fear and madness, I was shouting inside my heart.

 

Gurgle, gurgle. My stomach hurts.

 

My mind was invaded with thoughts of taking a shit.

I, Futsu Jintarou, am a very ordinary high school boy. 16, and currently in first year of high school.

 

Appearance was mediocre, academic performance was above average, and athletic ability was also average.

Why was I, the definition of normalcy, be put in such a predicament... Why was I being forced to make such a choice...

 

Toilet or death.

 

Shit, just why?!

I tried my best to keep my mind from going blank in the biggest turning point of my life, and I tried to organize my thoughts.

 

Even though it was the end of July and the weather was hot and humid, I was draped in an unusual amount of cold sweat. And standing in front of me was a beautiful girl.

Yes, I decided to make a "love confession" to Miyanouchi Akane, and callled her here.

Now, was I just gonna go to the bathroom after going this far...or will I leak myself in front of the girl I like and be given an emotional death sentence...

 

Tomorrow, the day after, and the coming more days were always the same.

It felt like I was being stretched out thinner and thinner, as if I was dying a slow death.

 

I had always wanted to get out of this repeating mediocity, but who would want to be dropped from normalcy to the bottom this way?

 

 

◇

 

 

A few minutes ago―

 

The closing ceremony had finished, and students around the school were either going home or were chatting inside the school.

While the students were making merry in the hallway to my side, I stood stiffly like a soldier waiting for someone.

Why? To make a confession, of course.

 

I didn't know how long I would have to wait.

 

But the discomfort caused by my sweat sticking to my shirt, plus the tension, was slowly eating at me.

Furthermore, I was getting more sick because of this head, and my stomach hurts.

I needed to go to the bathroom so badly.

 

This is getting bad.

 

I couldn't withstand the pressure against my bowels, and thought about going to the bathroom temporarily.

At that time, I heard one of my female schoolmates hurrying up the stairs, out of breath.

The noise came from the girl I liked, who took the trouble to meet me.

 

"Ah..."

 

The moment I saw her. the hellish sensation I was feeling earlier vanished like a lie.

Who I was seeing in front of me right now was the one I was going to confess to, and seemed to embody the word "beautiful".

 

Her name was Miyanouchi Akane.

Her porcelain skin was so white that my sweat-drenched shirt looked yellowish in comparison.

Her round eyes shine unlike mine, which were lethargic and cynical.

More importantly, her glossy jet-black hair, trimmed at the shoulders, smelled slightly floral. On the other hand, my short hair, sticky with sweat, smelled like a garbage dump, so close interactions were a no-go.

 

"Ah..."

 

She was an attentive and a kind-hearted person who ranked high in her class heirarchy. It was to the point where she was even apologizing to me at the beginning of her speech.

 

"Were you waiting? I'm sorry! I was helping clean up after club activites and it got this late. I heard from Kouya-kun and Yuuki-kun...was there something you wanted to talk about?"

 

I couldn't tell from her expression whether she guessed my intention or not.

However, when I saw the seriousness in her eyes, I thought there may be a chance of success.

I suppressed my rising emotions and responded calmly.

 

"No, you don't have to worry that. Thank you for making time for me instead."

 

She shook her head slowly.

 

"No, that's okay. Because Jintarou-kun is my classmate. If you are in trouble, I am in the same boat. I'll listen to anything you'd like to ask. So what happened? Is it bullying?"

 

No, I said, smiling awkwardly.

She looked at me, tilted her head, and continued with a serious expression.

 

"Don't overdo it. Tell me the truth, okay? It's fine, I won't tell anyone. I love everyone in this class. If we're going to have our summer vacation, you would want it to start with a clean slate, wouldn't you? I may look like this, but I don't lose fights that easily."

 

Hearing those words, I thought Miyanouchi-san was really cute. She was a good girl, extremely reliable, and adored by everyone in her class. It was obvious that many boys had some feelings for her, and I was one of them.

 

If I were to use a theater cast analogy, she would be the Princess, and I would be Passerby A, the least conspicuous of the cast. No, forget having a role, I may as well be the lighting assistant...only there to make her stand out. Possibly not even that, just someone in the audience. Try and find a guy like that who would just go up and confess to the princess. He will definitely be caught by security and escorted out.

 

The reason I didn't become someone suspicious like that and was able to try and confess was thanks to my two best friends, Yuuki and Kouya. They They led her to come here for me.

 

For their sake and my own, I can't back down.

Determined, I slowly opened my mouth.

 

"Actually, there was something troubling me...rather, does this even count as troubling...I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now."

 

I briefly began to recount the story of how I fell in love with her at first sight when I entered high school. She widened her eyes in surprise, but continued staring at me who was stammering as she listened attentively. Perhaps it was my imagination, but her cheeks were slightly flushed.

 

When I realized this, my heart began to beat so loudly that I was sure that she could hear it.

I felt an indescribable, pale pink aura enveloping us.

 

"M-Miyanouchi-san greets everyone kindly. I was so happy when Miyanouchi-san talked to me that I started talking to other people, too..."

 

After overcoming a battle against nervousness and embarassment, I was now able to exchange morning and after-school greetings with Miyanouchi-san.

 

"And with my English homework. I always asked Miyanouchi-san to help me with my homework before class to make sure I was doint it correctly. Thank you."

 

In junior high school, I never did much homework. But when I realized that it could be a common topic with Miyanouchi-san, I began doing it everyday without fail in June.

 

"When I heard Miyanouchi-san liked short hair, I decided to style mine, too."

 

July, I began to worry about my appearance, and changed my hairstyle.

 

I was so embarassed to say this that I just kept on fiddling with my hair, which was now flowing with sweat.

I looked over and saw that she was nodding her slowly as if she was carefully pondering over my words. Even such a small gesture like that only made my heart beat faster.

 

"A-all that, just so I could exchange a few words with Miyanouchi-san."

 

I said it out loud.

I had never given this much effort in my studies or athletics before.

My feelings for Miyanouchi-san is second to none.

 

"Just so...you could talk to me?"

 

She mutterred. It was obvious she was waiting for me what to say next. And I knew what I had to say.

As I was about to unleash the final weapon 『CONFESSION』, something else was also about to be unleashed.

 

 

This is bad...I want to shit so badly.

 

Why, why, why?! It was fine a few moments ago. I had no idea what could have triggered it.

The excruciating cries of my intestines rang alarm bells throughout my body.

This was definitely past the danger zone, and I knew that the dangerous material on the level of a nuclear warhead was about to descend.

 

Meltdown, it began.

My despair too, began.

 

Uwoahhhhhhhh!

 

Pant, pant...

 

But I endured. I held on.

I gathered all the strength I could muster and tightened my anus.

 

I can't afford to strain any facial expression...but a man has to act through and show them!

With all my might, I forced a smile and kept the hydrogen bomb from the saying hello to the outside world.

 

Spirit, guts, willpower, just like at Sekigahara, the battle that divided the world.

If you win, you live a life of peace; if you lost, you lose your head.

 

I've made it this far...only one more step.

 

 

I have changed because of you.

In my fervent desire to bring out my best in front of her, I've made an effort that wasn't typical of me. Desperately.

From my days of being absorbed in galge that Kouya lent me, it was an unimaginable transformation.

 

I have worked so hard to make up for my junior high school days, to which I was given the nickname "Ordinary Person", which I was embarassed to respond to because of the reading of my name[1], Futsu Jintarou. Although I wasn't yet average, I was confident that I can surpass it. She gave me that confidence.

 

If she was in trouble, I will casually lend out a hand. If she looked bored, I will be the clown that would make her laugh. If Miyanouchi-san wants to, I can be.

Yes, I can even be a hero. So I don't want to pull out here. There was no way I could say "Please wait minute, I have to go bathroom," when things were going this well.

It was impossible to get back to this mood.

 

If she had a big tolerance, she would allow me to leave for the restroom in the middle of this, but before that, I, someone with a tolerance smaller than my anus, would not allow it.

 

Phew...

 

Facing your own conflicts, huh...I guess this is what you call a confession. This was the best. You would be an ass if you get frightened from this. My ass does hurt, though.

 

A-anyway, here I go!

 

"I—"

 

Then when tried to release the words of my confession in rhythm with the early summer breeze...

 

Ah...

 

It's the devil. This is really bad.

 

The intense pain in my abdomen, which I thought I had suppressed with my willpower, came rushing in like the rippling in the surface of the water.

 

Toilet or death.

Shit or death.

I went through so many thoughts that my brain burned out, and I hesitantly came up with a choice.

 

It really was down to this, dash to the toilet to poop, or social death by leaking.

 

Uwoooooaaahhhhh!

 

As my feet took a step towards the bathroom, the land of salvation, while my heart cried out the lamentations of my soul...the voices of my two best friends reverberated in my already inverted brain.

 

『Jintarou really worked hard so far. After this, you can vent out your feelings on us.』

 

Yuuki always comforted me with his smile. My current feeling was that I wanted to take a shit. If I express my feelings like this, will he accept it?

 

Aaahhh, I'm about the release the brown bomb!

 

『We worked together. No matter what it turned out to, you must report to us.』

 

Kouya was a handsome guy with glasses, and unusually protective of me.

Report? What should I report? Did you mean that I should report how much shit came out?!

So you wanted to take stool samples, you glasses-wearing bastard!

 

I no longer knew why I was asking myself these incomprehensible questions.

But, the next two sentences brought me back to my senses.

 

『I won't allow you to rejoice or cry alone.』

『Because you have us.』

 

That was what my best friends probably wanted to tell me.

 

My two friends called her out to the four-way intersection in the corridor. There were only facilities that weren't normally used, like the audiovisual rooms, music rooms, and science rooms in the fourth floor of the school building, so there were only a few people.

When they arranged for my confession, Yuki and Kouya offerred to help me in any way they could, but I turned them in an attempt to show my chivalrous spirit.

 

The result was that I was alone with Miyanouchi-san.

The result was the situation were are in now.

 

I don't want to leave behind what had been set up to go to the bathroom.

It inspired a heart that was about to break.

 

Shit or confession!

When I reached a new mindset, I came up with a new option.

It was only four seconds since Miyanouchi-san's questioning words. The flow of time was strangely slow.

 

I can do this.

This can be accomplished.

I shouldn't run away.

 

Every second I hesitate, the life of my anus was shrinking.

 

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All I had to do was say one more sentence.

I opened my mouth and said emphatically.

 

"Miyanouchi-san, I lik—splurt, splurt..."

 

Long held thoughts and feelings, released.

Shit was also released.

 

An unprecedented exhilaration shook and raped both my mind and body.

 

"Ahh, ugh, ah, aghhhhhh!!"

 

I screamed out as I released a huge amount of stuff out of my ass that I shouldn't have.

It seemed that it was with bad luck that he exerted himself as he confessed, and it came loose.

 

"Eh, wait, can't be...no way! Eeeeekk?!"

 

When urine was released along with feces, Miyanouchi screamed and fell backward as she passed out.

That's right. It would be unimaginable for a person who was aobut to confess to you to suddenly leak out a few moments ago. When I thought about this, tears welled up in my eyes.

 

Sweat was also coming out since a while ago, and I could feel my body drenched in fluids.

 

At the same time, some'ns voice rang out in my ears.

 

"Eh, what the heck is this?! Seriously, what the shit!"

"Hey, someone call a teacher!"

 

Having heard Miyanouchi-san's screams, students from the Science Club and that Wind Ensemble Club rushed towards us, as they had not left school yet. They surrounded us as onlookers.

 

Some were laughing, some were cursing. Some even vomited.

 

"Call the Beautification Committee! They're supposed to be the one cleaning up!"

"Stop fucking with me! I don't want to, you bastard!"

 

The cursing from the crowd in the distance can be heard.

But, such a thing doesn't matter.

 

I just laughed in despair, my knees wobbling. As it was, I lost all strength in my hips and collapsed into a puddle of filth I had let out myself.

 

What was burned into my mind was the face of horror from Miyanouchi Akane-san before she fainted.

 

Everything was over.

Both confession and school life.

I'm sure I did the best I could...

 

In my fading consciousness, I suddenly heard a sound that was shooing away people.

 

"Hey, you guys! Get out of the way! Didn't you hear me say to get out of the way?!"

 

Even though he was generally intellectual, this rough voice was Kouya. As I looked up slightly in a daze, I saw him, tall enough to be visible even from here, repelling people away with his bag.

 

"Jintarou! Sorry, I'm late. I got curious and came back because people were gathering here and so I went to check...eh, why are you covered in shit?!"

 

It was Yuuki who marveled at me as he carried me without worrying about getting himself covered in filth.

 

"This is not a spectacle! The sooner you get out of here, the sooner you get home!"

 

Kouya kicked a trash can in the corner to intimidate the onlookers. The trash can hit one of them, but he didn't care and barked more.

 

"Mention it again, and the fire extinguisher will be next!"

 

The crowd flinched at Kouya who was fuming in rage, and scatterred in the blink of an eye.

 

"Okay... Yuuki, I'll explain it to the nurse who will be arriving after this. You carry Jintarou to the shower room of the Swimming Club. This is an emergency and since they are still probably still training, ask them to lend you a shower. After that, my jersey is inside my locker, so take that. I'll clean this place up. Ah, that's right. I have to take Miyanouchi to an infirmary bed. I'll probably be a little late, so go ahead and leave first." 

 

Kouya gave instructions in a brisk manner. He was a good-looking guy with glasses who was quick to fight, but he was also good at taking care of someone.

 

"Okaaay. Well then, we should start moving. Jintarou, are you okay? Let's go."

"...o-okay."

 

I nodded, my consciousness vague.

As I slowly descended the stairs with Yuuki carrying me on his shoulders, Kouya took a plastic sports bottle out of his bag and placed it in mine.

 

"I forgot. Take this with you. You probably drained all the water out of your body earlier, so you might get dehydrated."

"...thanks."

 

Kouya, if I were a woman, I might have fallen in love with you...

 

 

◇

 

 

Fate was cruel. No, I had the momentum to rise to the top of my life until about halfway through.

How can I fail and tumble down like that?

 

It was salvation, however, that my two best friends were there to help me. No matter how many words of gratitude I say to Kouya and Yuuki, they will never be enough.

After what happened, I washed myself in the shower room of the Swimming Club, and changed into Kouya's jersey so that Yuuki could take care of me.

 

And now I was in the middle of walking back from schoom with Yuuki. The bag containing my bag and uniform which were covered in shit was unusually heavy.

 

"Well, that, how do I say it. Don't worry about it. Everyone makes mistakes, right? Well, I don't think it was that often to make such a big failure. Hm."

"H-hm..."

 

Yuuki was trying to cheer me up, but I just brushed it off.

On the way home, we came across a scramble intersection on the main street. Looking in front of me, I saw the news on a huge TV hanging off the wall of a large department store across the street.

 

『One after another in across the country?! Sudden sexual conversion incident.』

『At last, it begins! A VRMMO that offers a glimpse into the essence of human nature. Distribution will begin shortly.』

 

"Ah, it this VRMMO! The one we played in its beta testing. Let's play it together again, for a change of pace."

"Hm? Yeah..."

 

I responded to Yuuki's care again, but I was caught up in another piece of news.

I've seen a lot of that lately.

That particular news.

 

I would like to be transformed into a woman, preferrably a little girl, and start all over again. Not just about what happened today, but everything in the past, without anyone finding out.

 

Something like this.

What a ridiculous thought.

I shook my head and thought about other things in a daze.

 

"Hey, Yuuki. We're friends, aren't we..."

 

Yuuki smiled bitterly at my question, as if embarassed.

 

"Ha? What are you talking about. If you weren't my friend, I wouldn't be carrying you shit-covered ass. I still can't get rid of the smell of your shit. God."

 

Saying so, Yuuki frowned in a frightening manner as he smelled my uniform.

But this guy is genuinely worried about me, and Yuuki's frightening smirk was dazzling in the sun.

 

Sweat almost broke out of my eyes again, so I pretended to look away from that glare and turned my head to the side.

 

"Seriously...thank you."

"Ahaha."

 

Yuuki walked in front of me, laughing softly as usual.

 

"These things were embarassing...but I think friends will do what's necessary at such a time. The same thing Jintarou did for me in junior high school, I would do the same for you today. Right?"

 

Yuuki continued to walk with looking back.

As I looked at the back of my reliable best friend, saltwater dropped from my eyes.

 

"That's why this much is normal, Mr. Ordinary—, heh."

 

Yuuki teasing me with my old nickname cheered me up a bit.

 

Tomorrow was summer vacation. Just right to recover mentally.

I can never see Miyanouchi Akane face-to-face.

 

I had nothing to lose anymore. All I could was to pick up the pieces again.

As expected, nothing more to lose...

 

 

◇

 

 

"Sigh..."

 

I exhaled at the ceiling.

When I got home, I laid down on the bed in my room dominated by silence.

 

"Sigh..."

 

I sighed for the second time, and a remote control hit my hand, which I somehow managed to grab.

 

...It's quiet.

 

I turned on the TV instead of playing some background music and a certain news played.

 

『A series of abrupt sexual transformations across the country...The cause of the incidents were still unknown, and six boys and girls were known to have already been suffering from this mysterious condition. For more information on the government's response and future plans, please visit...』

 

Sexual transformation...

 

I forced my lethargic thoughts back to life, and once again, I began to vividly recall that moment.

I tried to confess my feelings to the girl I liked, but in your nervousness and despair, you shit your pants.

 

Why didn't I go to the bathroom then, without any sort of questioning at the time?

The reason was obvious.

 

There was no way that I could let a sudden diarrhoea destroy that atmosphere, the culmination of all my little efforts — my confession.

It would be impossible for me to go to toilet right then and there and make another confession stone-facedly.

 

Was the shit important, or was the confession more important?

Of course, it's the confession.

I made the right choice.

Considerably, it was a rather unusual choice.

I chose to be chivalric.

Attempting to be an honorable man, was that a mistake..?

 

"...ugh, just turn me into a girl or something already."

 

If I could, I would.

I poked fun at the hottest topic on the news today, the sudden sex change.

 

After this summer break, my title at school would probably be "Confession Shitter". The "Ordinary Person" one I had in junior high was still better.

 

I was half sulking, and half dismayed.

 

"Ugh..."

 

These damn tears welled up again.

Again, I collapsed into the bed.

 

With nothing but despair, I fell into slumber, and left hung on to my bed to heal my exhausted self, as if to escape from reality.

 

 

◇

 

 

I wonder how much time had passed.

The sound from my phone woke me up as I yawned.

 

"Yaawwwnnn..."

 

Suddenly, I heard a girl's voice, or rather, an exhale.

 

"Ah?"

 

But, that voice.

 

"Eh, what?"

 

My voice sounded cute?

That sweet voice, it was coming out of my mouth.

 

 

[1] Futsujin = Ordinary Human

 

TL Note

Yo, feet here. Started a new series. No new translations have been released in almost a year, so it should be okay for me to snipe. Originally, my plan was to just clean up and edit the previous translations, but when I started comparing to the original, the previous translator cut out some details and nuances that would have made this novel more enjoyable. 

This took me a rather considerable amount of time to translate, so updates might not be too frequent. Not to mention that I'm a machine translator, so I'll have to double check what I'm writing. I'll do my own translation from the bottom, so wish me luck. Hopefully, I'll be able to do at least 2-3 chapters/week.

Please do point out corrections in the comments. I'm a one-man team, so I might have missed some typos. Thanks for reading!

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