Chapter 35: HTSCF CH 033 Boxers or briefs?

The next day Jun woke up early to go shopping. Since he was still a high school student living in T City, which had a good public transportation system, it was easy to explore and figure out where things were as everything was convenient and within walking distance. There was a small neighborhood market that suited his needs just a 10 minute walk away from his apartment.

After spending about a half-hour shopping for some food goods and other necessities, he was about to return home when he passed a milk tea shop.

“!!!”

When was the last time Jun had freshly shaken milk tea made by bobaristas? Too long ago. But it was still too early and the shop was not open. He lamented over the fact milk tea shops opened so late! Head down, Jun listlessly returned home to have a simple breakfast of instant noodles with an egg and some vegetables.

(A/N: If y’all don’t know what a bobarista is… then you’ve never had milk tea.)

Fei Lan didn’t have any summer homework and the milk tea shop wouldn’t open for another couple of hours, so Jun could only log into ADAS and grind some more exp, not realizing that he had become a little famous. Whenever a player re-entered the game, they would always start at the same point: Magnolia City.

At the sight of the red-haired young man with the name <no milk tea, no life> above his head, the people around immediately started whispering among themselves.

“Is that him?”

“That’s him, that’s him!”

A few girls giggled. “Should we talk to him?”

Confused but unbothered, Jun was about to teleport to Augustine Forest, when a woman’s voice stopped him.

“Hey, milk tea boy!”

He turned around to see a voluptuous woman with purple-gray hair and a charming smile, her brown eyes twinkling with amusement. Above her head read: <Boxers or briefs?>

“You are?”

“Can’t you tell?”

He stared at the player's name again and tilted his head. “Both.”

“Oh my gosh, exactly!” The woman exclaimed. “We should be friends. Add me?” Before he could stop her, she reached for his hands and shook them with vigor. It was that easy to add friends in ADAS. Then she sent him a private message.

[Boxers or briefs?: I’m Oriana. What’s your name?]

At the sight of the familiar name, Jun paused. It couldn’t be the same person, right? Many people had the same name—just look at his first two incarnations.

[no milk tea, no life: You can call me Jun. Why do you want to be my friend?]

[Boxers or briefs?: Are you kidding? Just look at our player names! We’re meant to be friends, I know it.]

[no milk tea, no life: Ok…?]

[Boxers or briefs?: Want to level up? I know a place with an even better exp gain than Augustine Forest.]

In a way, he was a new player too, because of the lack of the original’s memories. He had only found Augustine Forest after quickly browsing through a guide of the game. Other aspects that would take time to discover, such as a secret dungeon, were beyond him.

[no milk tea, no life: Ok, lead the way.]

Oriana sent Jun a party request and he accepted, then she teleported them to the outskirts of Shane Town and started trekking up the snow-covered mountain path. While he was trailing behind, Jun searched for Oriana’s information and was surprised by the results.

Oriana Silvie, or goddess Oriana as she was known to her male fans, was #3 on the overall player ranking list, meaning in ADAS, out of all the 23 servers currently available, she was the third most powerful player. As a Demon Mage, she was #1 in the Mage ranking list and was already at the level cap of 119. What did a god-tier player want with him? Was it just to make friends?

Looking back to make sure Jun was following her, Oriana spoke, “Yuki Kitsune can be found here. They’re tenacious and a little hard to kill, but the exp gain is so worth it. With me here, I’ll carry you until level 70 today, so let’s go, go, go!”

(A/N: Yuki Kitsune or Snow Fox in Japanese)

Oriana charged right in and aimed a fire blast at the first Yuki Kitsune. At her level, most mid-level monsters like the Yuki Kitsune were easily killed with just one attack. With his bow and arrow, Jun also took out some of the Yuki Kitsune.

“Your archery skills are indeed good. By the way, why is your gear so terrible?”

Although Jun considered purchasing some gear yesterday, all the player shops just happened to be closed, including the game’s general shop.

“I have shit luck.”

Oriana checked his player stats and made a face. “Luck -250? How is that even possible?”

Jun laughed wryly. “Oh, it’s possible when you follow the Cursed route.” You just had to be a cannon fodder with the worst luck to unlock it.

Oriana patted his shoulder with pity. “Cursed route?”

“Check my player stats again.”

After taking a more in-depth look, Oriana wrinkled her eyebrows. “I’ve never heard of a Cursed route. What are the buffs?”

“Luck -300, Damage Received 3X, Exp Gain +300%.”

“Oh my, that explains why you were camping in Augustine Forest yesterday.”

“… How do you know about that?”

“Sweetie, everyone knows! Except maybe you, it seems.” Oriana pulled up a forum post and showed it to Jun. On the front page of the post was a video someone took of him in the trees. Underneath were the captions: “Saw this pretty boy yesterday. Nearly missed him because he almost blended with the background. His archery skills are crazy and it’s 100% manual! Just watch the video. Too badass! Does anyone know who he is? What’s milk tea? Does he have a girlfriend? Cause if he doesn’t…”

Being known wasn’t a bad thing, but…

You are reading story Falling: How to Survive as a Cannon Fodder at novel35.com

The next second, an unexpected loudspeaker message appeared in the server chat for all to see.

[no milk tea, no life: I am gay.]

At first, responses in the server chat mainly consisted of: ???

Then the fangirls appeared, along with some fanboys.

[Where have all the fish gone?: Pretty boy! I don’t care if you’re gay. Where are you right now? Let’s be friends!]

This world was very open-minded, in that gay marriage had become an undeniable universal right, but of course, that never stopped those closed-minded individuals who couldn’t accept those different from what they deemed to be “normal.” Even if this world wasn’t that open, though, Jun still wouldn’t hide his sexuality. That was just who he was.

[Why so salty?: Do you practice archery in real life, pretty boy?]

[93 Degrees Fahrenheit: Are you Cupid? You must be because I am in love!]

Oriana saw this and laughed while Jun cringed.

[Boxers or briefs?: Sorry everyone, little Jun is already mine mwahahaha.]

[2nd Male Lead Needs Love Too: My goddess!!! Why did you choose a gay over me?]

[Where have all the fish gone?: Pretty boy’s name is Jun?]

[Boxers or briefs?: Yup.]

[Why so salty?: Goddess, share location?]

[Boxers or briefs?: No way.]

[93 Degrees Fahrenheit: Pretty boy? Little Jun? Did he leave?]

[2nd Male Lead Needs Love Too: What if he’s a she?]

Everyone reading the chat: !!!

[no milk tea, no life: I am 100% male, 300% gay.]

[Limes and Lemons: 300% gay? Hahahahaha. So the gay part is more important?]

Li Jie saw this and couldn’t help but admire Jun’s courage. Although homosexuality was no longer something “unusual,” his family was still very traditional and old-fashioned. If only he could be as free as Jun.

After withdrawing from the server chat, Oriana and Jun went back to grinding for exp and item drops for about 2 hours only stopping when Jun reached level 70. Reaching level 99 wasn’t difficult and most people could do it in two weeks while playing casually, so it was unsurprising for Jun to reach his current level with the amount of grinding he’d done on top of the exp buff.

Checking his inventory, he saw that he had received over 300 Fox Tails that could be sold for 1 silver coin, which caused Oriana to roll over in laughter before giving him some items out of pity.

“What do you want to do now?” Oriana asked. “Want to do a dungeon?”

“Can’t, I have to go back to the real world.”

“Aw, will you be on later today?”

“I’ll be back in an hour.”

“Ok, then I’ll find you in Magnolia City in an hour?”

With a nod, Jun logged out of the game. Back in the real world, he made himself a light lunch before heading out to the milk tea shop.

Even after finishing his drink, he felt empty inside. Milk tea didn’t taste so great without his Azazel and Elior. After being separated from the two men for 15 years, they had accomplished the impossible and completely replaced milk tea as the #1 spot in his heart.

Where were they?

Back in ADAS, Jun stood by the only fountain in Magnolia City to wait for Oriana. He had messaged her but she had to handle some guild-related matters for a little while. He didn’t mind waiting since it gave him the chance to people watch.

A flash of long silver hair passed by and Jun’s heart skipped a beat. “Eli?”

It was not him. It wasn’t even a man but a woman. Jun sighed and palmed his cheek in a thoughtful manner.

“Hey, baby, waiting for me?” An arm slung around Jun’s shoulder, nearly sending him flying. With gritted teeth and furrowed eyebrows, Jun grabbed the man’s arm and threw him over his shoulder. Who was this sleazebag? Jun shuddered and rubbed his arms to ease his goosebumps.

This was the scene Oriana arrived at. A Swordmaster with brown hair and brown eyes was lying on the ground in shock, while Jun looked ready to commit murder.

“What did you just call me!?”

Oriana rushed over to pull Jun away before he killed someone. Though Magnolia City was a safe zone, it only meant player-killing was impossible. People could still get into fights and cause each other pain.

Up in the sky, in a floating castle that was visible from anywhere in Atlan, a man slammed his fist on the table when he saw the same scene as Oriana on his screen. He didn’t know why it irritated him but he was certain that only he could call that young man “baby.”

The other man in the room was equally furious. Who did that guy think he was to put his arms on his person? He didn’t know why he thought that way but he was certain the young man was HIS.

Oblivious to all that, Jun went back to grinding exp and items with Oriana, still getting only useless junk that sold for a total of 1 measly silver coin.

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