How to survive the worst novel ever written

Chapter 39: Chapter 39 – Returning home


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The story about who turned out to be the murderer and why she did it spread like wildfire among the people of Fairview. Although most of that motivation had been invented by the staff of the mansion, since the police never wanted to reveal the details of the implied one´s testimony, that didn´t prevent people from coming up with their own theories, distorting events at will until creating a story that satisfied the listeners.

There was, however, one thing on which they all agreed: Emma had gone after Madeleine to the shed because that was where she kept all the evidence of her guilt. Something absurd because, as Oscar had well guessed in previous days, the shed was going to be renovated and therefore Weiss visited it often. It would have been stupid to have anything relevant to the resolution of the case there.

The reality was, if Emma went after Madeleine, it was because she was asking too many questions since making her goal to solve the murder. No, not only that. Because, in the end, Kenneth was also the type to talk too much. Madeleine, apart from speaking, had the indecency to sneak into the servants' rooms — the women's hall, at least — without even obtaining permission from the hosts. As not even the officers had done such an exhaustive investigation, invading the privacy of so many innocents and inquiring into every corner, asking about any trifle that she found suspicious, it was obvious the protagonist would end up bothering someone.

Emma confessed, after they arrested her, that she originally only planned to lock up Madeleine. Believing this would serve as a threat for her to give up her eagerness to act as a righteous heroine but, later, she realized she had been asking the right questions and began to suspect... Wouldn't Madeleine be the person who almost discovered her in fraganti, when she sneak into the kitchens that night? It had to be! But Emma hid so fast that day that she wasn´t able to see her. Hence, at the last minute, she decided to return to Fairview for a gun to finish the job.

Madeleine, when told about that incident in the kitchen, didn´t deny anything either. After her initial surprise when the officers repeated that part of Emma's testimony to her, she brazenly lied. Feigning a certainty that she didn´t have a few seconds ago, she took all the credit for having found the murderer and indicated that if she hadn´t faced her that night that she came across her in the kitchen, it was only because then she still did not know. Madeleine knew of no murder and wanted to give her a vote of confidence, despite already feeling that something shady was up.

In this way, the protagonist remained a heroine in the eyes of hosts and guests.

Perhaps Albert could also have enjoyed that popularity, since it was he who saved the two people from the shed and put the police on alert. But no. And it wasn´t because of a supposed partiality with respect to the rest of the guests, but because he didn´t want to accept that fame. He could accept some isolated gratitude, even downplaying the matter, but if someone came to talk to him about the adventure, prompting him to narrate the whole incident from his point of view, he would try to pass the credit on to someone else.

For example, it was not he who found Madeleine in the shed: It was him and three other employees, the four of them together. It's not that he used his weapon as a threat either because he wanted to be a protagonist, it's that he was the only one with a rifle. And it wasn't like he had just reduced the killer, either. No, he limited himself to pointing a gun at her and, taking advantage of the fact the woman was defenseless, having been forced to drop her own gun, it was the others who tied her up and drove her to the mansion, until police was notified.

For this reason, Albert barely had fifteen minutes of fame. They soon forgot about him, having another person much more willing to accept flattery.

As for Oscar, he didn't even get that. As they found him in a cabin in the middle of the snow, half dead, and having to be protected from an alleged dangerous criminal, people completely turned him into a victim. Pitying him, they all assumed that he was only obeying his patron when he accompanied Madeleine and no one stopped to think about his involvement in this whole plot.

Oscar was upset to be treated as a helpless victim, who could do nothing without the protection of someone like the protagonist — well, that's how they made him look when they talked about him — but he had to swallow all his discontent. It also didn't suit him to give his version, since having all that attention converge on him wouldn´t be good.

So even when the police questioned him again, he kept omitting the details of his own investigation. Counting as little as possible and agreeing with Madeleine in her dire story. Anyway, what did it matter? He would never see most of these people again, and those he would see knew a good part of what actually happened. Therefore, Oscar concentrated on money.

He had finally gotten rid of his debts! Shouldn't that be enough cause for joy? He would save a little more, enough to be able to pay a cheap rent in a couple of months and at the end of the year he would say goodbye to Lilac Hall forever.

He didn´t know where he would go next, if he would try to get a position that required more hours and work in the newspaper where he continued to publish his stories or if he´d look for something else, leaving that job as a second option. In any case, he didn´t want to have to work in private homes again. All his problems seemed to come from there!

"Oscar, I can finally see you!" Madeleine had exclaimed, coming towards him.

It had been three days since Oscar woke up in the villain's room. Three days that had served him to recover and for the agents to give permission, after carrying out a few last steps, to the guests to retire to their own homes. So that morning there was already a veritable procession of carriages in front of the mansion, with employees going here and there with luggage, preparing the cars to leave each in one direction.

"Ah, I see you're much better, it shows on your face," she continued, standing next to him. “But, seriously, how bad were you? Mr. Northrop didn't let me come in to visit you even once, it's not fair!”

"How is it that he didn't let you?"

Oscar knew that Madeleine had tried to bring him dinner the first day, but after that, he never heard from her again. He believed she would be busy tossing a story to her new admirers and hence had no chance to try again. But now it turned out that no, that all the time there was someone preventing her from returning.

“He told me you could infect me if I visited you often, that having exposed myself to the cold and humidity that night I was more at risk of getting sick, even if I only paid you a short visit. That's why I couldn't get in! I tried to convince him by saying I´m stronger than I look, but he was very insistent that it wasn´t convenient. And Oscar, look what I'm saying, I never had a high regard for Mr. Northrop, he always seemed a very flat and boring being to me, but I have to admit that he´s very chivalrous, thus caring for my well-being!”

Oscar laughed when he heard this, thinking that what the villain had was a talent for sending people to hell without being noticed.

"He even apologized to me for slamming the door in my face. And well, I understand that it was an emergency, so I won´t take it into account”

"So you already get along with him, don't you?"

"When have I gotten on badly with him?" Madeleine looked confused, as if she had forgotten that this lifelong neighbor had been ignored by her and her entire family until less than a week ago. “Just so you know, as boring as he may have seemed to me in the past, I´ve always considered him to be a most kind and considerate individual. I mean, you might be in for the drag, and your virus threatened to spread throughout the house if you weren't kept in quarantine, but he bravely decided to stay”

"Isn't that an exaggeration to say that a quarantine was decreed? It was a simple cold that wasn´t treated well, hence it got a bit worse”

Although he did have to admit to Madeleine that Albert staying with him was quite accurate. He may not have done it bravely, because one could see that the guy enjoyed being able to get rid of going out with the rest of the guests in exchange for being able to stay with Oscar in his room, but it was true that he took care of him.

In the last few days, most of the time was spent with Albert. Except during meal times for the guests and a casual moment when it was Kenneth, Sean, or one of the servants he had met at Fairview who came to bother for a while, the rest of the day he was with the villain. Albert was the first to come to his room in the morning and also the last to leave it at night. And since he slept in the next room, Oscar could afford to feel comforted by having an ally close by.

"My point is that the man has made a great effort for the collective well-being, which we must thank him for," Madeleine continued. “And speaking of thanking… How are you getting along with him?”

"Wait, wait, what's this about? Don't tell me you've reached out to me just to get close to him”

“Of course not! How could I? If I wanted something with Mr. Northrop, I would ask him. I wouldn´t be here bothering you, knowing that you are in poor health”

"I've recovered. Now I´m fine”

"Although," she continued, ignoring Oscar, "I did notice that my dear neighbor left your room in a very good mood. It didn't seem like he was paying the courtesy call or performing his moral duty in caring for a poor dying man, rather it gave the impression that he had just returned from seeing a good friend”After a suggestive pause, she added. “So I thought, why don't I ask Oscar to speak well of me to that illustrious gentleman who saved our lives? I´m convinced he would listen to you!”

"Madeleine, isn´t enough for you tormenting Patrick that you now want to go after Mr. Northrop too?"

“Idiot! It's not what it seems! Let's see, I do admit that my thing with Patrick is not going very well lately. In fact, he's behaving like an ass by avoiding me so much and… And it's quite likely that I no longer intend to marry him! Why, what an idiot he is to reject someone like me. I certainly deserve someone better!”

"At least we agree that Mr. Northrop is better than Patrick Seymour. Now, about what you deserve or not, I think it´ll be better to draw a thick veil”

“What are you insinuating?”

“Oh nothing. Just that playing Celestina is so exhausting… But you shouldn't worry about having intermediaries or not, don't you think? After all, with your natural charm, I am convinced that you can have anyone at your feet, if you put your mind to it. Or well, anyone except me, because I think I'm too old for this shit”

"I don't know what you're trying to tell me, but aren't you going to tell Mr. Northrop about me? I want to know why! Do you find it tiresome to do me this favor? I know that for a while now you´ve become too materialistic, but that's okay. I don't care, I can pay you to do the work!”

"No, thanks," Oscar said hastily, fearing that she would pull a gold bracelet out of her neckline, like last time. “I have paid off my debts and I´m going to keep working to pay my expenses, I no longer need anything from you! So do whatever you want, that's not my concern. Go back to Patrick or go try to cajole someone else, whatever you feel like it, but I'm not going to speak in your favor now that I no longer have the incentive to do so”

"Are you really not going to do anything for me?"

"I'll just be a spectator, if you hurry me too much. And I tell you that that is enough, since I have no interest in what you do with your existence from now on”

That made Madeleine angry and, by the way, she would have protested and scolded Oscar for his lack of civility. But she didn't. She preferred to take a deep breath and remind his precious friend of the number of years they had spent together, the fact that there was a time when they were like siblings who always supported each other, claiming they couldn´t abandon each other like this. Then, when Oscar declared that he had just abandoned her and didn´t feel any remorse doing it, she limited herself to remind him that one day he was going to regret it. She then left at a rapid pace, with her head held high, trying not to show her anger.

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The conversation, until the end, had developed in a calm way, without any of the parties raising their voices. Without Madeleine getting hysterical and trying to hit him. Strange, considering how she behaved when someone denied her a whim. It was even impressive that she hadn't even started crying!

But, thinking about it again, Oscar got it. Madeleine had now taken to winning Albert's favor. And Albert was a friend of his. It was evident the protagonist had to treat Oscar well to make a good impression on the villain!

Let's see how long it lasts, Oscar thought, dismissing the matter.

With the hatred the villain seemed to have for her, it was likely he would send her to hell as soon as she bothered him. And, furthermore considering that her strategies to get noticed were too forced for someone like Albert, who with his usual introversion only wanted to get away from those who disturbed his peace of mind, the only thing Madeleine could achieve if she didn´t change the method would be to be hated even more.

Thinking how long it would take for the protagonist to be offended by the villain continuing to ignore her, Oscar approached one of the carriages belonging to the Seymours. The carriage that he would use in a few minutes to make his way home, in which the rest of the servants that Patrick had brought with him were already waiting for him.

When Oscar arrived, Lamb was helping the coachman lift the last suitcases to the roof of the car, securing them with the appropriate straps. Mallory, who had been in conversation with Kenneth up to that point, smiled in relief when she saw that a new victim for the young gardener's mindless gossip was coming her way.

"Has Madeleine already told you?" Kenneth asked without preamble, as soon as Oscar was before him. “It's a disgrace! We have to do everything we can to help!”

"But Mr. Seymour has expressly told us not to," Mallory pointed out. “And Miss Cornell, although behind the back of her fiancé, also mentioned something similar”

"But Mallory, how are we going to ignore it? The happiness of our masters is at stake!”

"Can someone explain to me what's going on?"

"So Madeleine didn't tell you? Oh, it's understandable," Kenneth murmured that last sentence, more to himself than to anyone else, "She was very worried about your health these days and she sure didn't want to tell you, so that her problems wouldn't keep you awake. But I'll confess it to you now!” Making sure, once again, that neither Madeleine nor Patrick were near her to hear him, he began. “Do you remember the engagement ring she found in her soup the other day? Well, it´s lost! I thought, and so I pointed it out to the masters, that surely that maleficent murderer would have stolen it. Because let's see, if she dares to slit the throat of one of the most beloved guests while he slept, what would she not dare to do? But they quickly dismissed that possibility, without giving me time to continue theorizing. And I don´t understand! Mr. Seymour told us that it wasn´t our responsibility to find the ring, so unless his fiancée asked us, we should not look for it”

"And Madeleine told us to forget about it, that she didn't need our help to find it," Mallory remarked good-naturedly, as if she already knew what this was all about and was happy not to have to be involved in an absurd search. “I wonder why she was so insistent…”

"She's playing strong!" Kenneth exclaimed. “But I know that she cares a lot about losing that ring. At the end of the day, it was a gift from her lover, those things cannot be lost and continue to insist that it doesn´t matter! Let's think that a wedding is at stake!”

"And what will Mr. Seymour do about this?" Oscar asked with growing curiosity. “Since Madeleine was the one who lost such a precious jewel, he should be the one to take responsibility for it and, if she can't find it, buy a new one, right?”

Mallory laughed at those ironic phrases, while Kenneth replied, still indignant:

"Mr. Seymour said he was going to pray for the ring to never be recovered and Miss Cornell would forget about it! Can you believe it? It seems to me that he´s angry because the ring he gave her must have had great sentimental value and of course, how to replace that?”

"Or maybe he doesn't want to spend money on a piece of jewelry to tie himself up to an unplanned engagement."

It was Mallory's statement that caused her and Kenneth to engage in a heated argument, in which the maiden had all to lose, about their master's wishes and illusions. This heated debate had no signs that it was going to come to fruition and therefore, seeing his collaboration was not required, Oscar took the opportunity to withdraw.

He was going to ask Lamb if they needed help with their luggage, and in case they didn't need it, it was his intention to take a seat inside the carriage. But he hadn't moved three steps away from his companions when he nearly ran into Albert Northrop, who had quietly approached from behind.

"I... I was just coming to ask you if you wanted to make your way back with me," Albert said with some difficulty, after a quiet greeting.

It was strange that the villain had strayed so far from his own carriage just to talk to someone else's employee. And rarer still was that he was the one who was inviting him to keep him company. That is, both the Seymours and the Northrop would travel in the same direction until they reached Snodland, but was it necessary to share living space with a noble that he didn´t work for that day of travel? It would have been wrong to accept if it had been the protagonists who required their presence in their car, but it was still seen as a greater lack of respect to accept the invitation of another individual who couldn´t even be considered a friend of their current employers.

This is what logic told him. Now, personally, Oscar would be lying if he said that the offer was not tempting. Surely it was far better to spend the journey in Albert's silent company than having to put up with the ever-required plans of action that Kenneth would set out once in motion.

"I'd like to," he confessed, "but could it be done? It would be an arrogant request on my part to ask Mr. Seymour's permission to do so”

And, needless to say, it would also have been arrogant for Albert to do it. After all, this could be seen as requiring the services of people who didn´t work for him.

"Oh, but you don't have to worry about that. I have already asked him and he has accepted”

But what the hell with it all? Were they talking about the same guy who wouldn't let his employees even approach the gate of his property to greet their relatives as they passed? Oscar looked away to where Patrick was talking to another of Ramsey's guests.

The protagonist already had Madeleine hanging from his arm and a complicated expression on his face. Perhaps, sensing that someone was watching him, he exchanged glances with Oscar for just three seconds. After that time he deliberately turned his head, ignoring even something that Madeleine must have been saying to him and for which she must have protested in a very proactive way. Patrick having made a gesture that implied something like: ‘Do what you want, I deny you,’ Oscar supposed that, indeed, he could do whatever he wanted from there.

At least until he got to Lilac Hall.

"I appealed to his generosity by saying you still hadn't recovered from your cold," Albert continued, guessing what the other was thinking. “And therefore it would be good if you traveled in a carriage without many passengers, so that the headache would not recur if the conversation was too much or the atmosphere was too loaded”

"I see you already had everything planned," Oscar murmured, thinking that on occasions like this, it did show that Albert was the villain.

Who else would put together a little plot like this to achieve their goal? After a couple of days resting, Oscar had almost no symptoms of any illness. He still had a bit of a cough, very occasionally but otherwise he was normal. The day before, in fact, he had even started helping the Ramseys' service with their cleaning chores.

"No, no, it was an afterthought," Albert had rushed to say, fearing he had done something to upset him. “I ran into Seymour earlier and thought I'd suggest it to him, it was totally off the bat! That's why I came to ask him if he´d let you, first I wanted to make sure that you had the permission if you decided to come”

"Well, I'll have to go then, right? It would be a shame to waste Mr. Seymour's generosity” Oscar smiled as he said this and the villain relaxed, perhaps considering that things hadn't gone so bad after all. “But you have to answer me something that I have been asking myself for a few months now”

“What is it about?”

"What have you done to Patrick Seymour to make him comply each of your requests so easy? If it had been me, he would have told me to fuck off before even opening my mouth to ask for anything”

"That... it's a rather long story."

After verifying this, both marched towards one of the carriages belonging to the Northrops. Oscar looked animated, trying to get more details out of Albert about this apparent superiority situation that he had with respect to the protagonist. And Albert, although somewhat nervous about not being able to answer these questions immediately, was also clear that he was not having a bad time.

Kenneth and Mallory had long since stopped arguing and were watching those two walk away. After several minutes of silence, it was the latter who spoke:

"Kenneth, are you sure those two get along badly enough to challenge each other to a duel? From here the impression is different”

 

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