I Want To Love This World

Chapter 1: 1


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With drowsy eyes and droopy hair, Kano lifted her head to the thud of a colliding train. The collision made the rails scream and hiss, bringing her train to a violent stop. Scratching her eyes, her thoughts mixed with wanting to investigate the commotion and going back to sleep. Kano had a dream, a dream that she became a hero. However now she was forever staring into blue, outside the window of her train car. Kano never knew how she ended up in the place, randomly slipping from reality in the dawn of the night. Yet she would pay no mind to it, being a passenger on eternal tracks, hearing the soft churning of the blue void.

A thump sounded from the roof of the car, much like footsteps clamping on the metal ceiling. Looking from her slumped position, the exit door in the very back unlocked with a click, while Kano was still unfazed. It wasn't long before a young man jumped through the door, landing on the side of his torso. Cursing his bad jump, he slowly got to his feet.

"Ouch... I shouldn't have done tha-"

He swiftly brought himself to the corner of the passenger car, frightened. He held a case tightly in his arms. Naturally meeting a person out in this realm of sorts, it was the first time Kano had seen another person. She lost track of time a long time ago. Tired, she slouched down on the seats once again, resting her head.

"Another person?..." he asked before the trains finally unhinged. The rails were slanted downwards, giving momentum as both of their passenger cars rolled down them. The boy lost his balance, falling towards the front of the cab. When the vehicle finally stabilized, he stood up while rubbing his banged-up head. He checked the case for any damage, although it was already beat up with holes and punctures on the front side.

"You are a person, right?" he said once again.

"Yeah, I am," Kano finally decided to put some effort into talking. Since it was a person, there was nothing else to do anyway.

She learned the boy's name, Ka Shin'u. From the pronunciation it was transliterated, so Kano just went with Kano as her name. Apparently the boy had been drifting too, having been drifting for more than two weeks across this plane, according to him.

"How long have you been here, Kano?"

"No idea. I just enjoy the nice view," she yawned while staring into the azure nothingness. Although there wasn't anything out there, there were countless railroads held by metal stands jutting straight from the bottomless abyss, across for thousands of li. Hunger and thirst never were a problem, and the trains kept on moving forward. It didn't matter to her anymore whether things came and went. Everything now was fleeting in the needle of time . No matter here or there, Kano was transparent. Even so, she had to live.

"I'm trying to search for a way out of here," Ka Shin'u emphasized, ruffling his shirt. "You can see outside, there's other train cars going on the same railroad."

"So how did you collide with mine?"

"I dunno. I was watching the back of mine before it came to a sudden stop," he responded, before walking to the back of the train to shut the door. "Either way, we are stuck here. Only Buddha knows if we fall off the tracks."

Not even once did Kano entertain the thought of it. In fact, it was as if she ignored every single strange thing, even this plane of existence itself.

"What were you like before coming here?" Kano probed lightly. It took a while, but eventually he slapped himself.

"I'm a musician from Shiyan, and nothing else."

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Shiyan was quite far, like Kano expected, for she was also from some place an ocean apart. In the plane of existence they laid in, very few interesting events ever happen. But compared to the other reality, it was more of a bliss than being under heaven. The train kept trodding along.

"How did you come to be here?"

"What's with that question? Of course I don't know. D'you know how to get out of here?"

"Oh, so that's it huh..." she made her back straight and stretched from her seat. "The first step you must take is to do nothing at all."

A minute passed soon after her response. It left him with a look of confusion, while he folded his fist.

"Hah? I don't need to sit around, I need to get back to the normal world," he was convinced with that idea of going back, attempting to keep his cool. There was only one way to go back.

"Does being a musician complete your life enough to want to return?"

"That doesn't matter in any of this."

"It doesn't?"

"..."

Truly, Kano did not know anything about him, nor who he was. Perhaps her words were useless in the emptiness of it all. It wasn't long before she went back to the usual cycle of staring out the window, sleeping, and dreaming. In this realm, those three things were the only undertakings she enjoyed. Ka Shin'u didn't bother to disrupt her routine, staying after concluding that to head back to his car would risk falling off into the dark chasm.

Kano dreamed about contributing, to be a so-called 'hero', while spending her time awake only to make little movement. It reminded her of the original world whenever she spoke, or walked around.

Kano wanted to disappear.

Kano wanted to erase it all.

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