Chapter 23: Chapter 23 Kanae

>> Kanae's POV <<  

I am walking together with a man on this street. It is evening now. There weren't any post lamps that light up the way like that from modern civilization but the road is not that entirely devoid of being visible because of the moonlight that came from above; the earth's very first and only natural satellite. 

'How many years would it take for the people in this world to advance in technology and be able to reach the vast space outside the earth's atmosphere?'

'Or Even just be able to fly in the sky somehow?' 

I ask myself these questions as I was remembering the past.

My past life rather. 

I am a reincarnated person who once lived a life on Earth and died not before even reaching my 20s. 

The Earth, is a world, in a timeline that is significantly far from my current world's technology, civilization, or state of life.

Back there, people had several conveniences in life, and to mention a few were: communicating from afar through the internet, some advanced transportation that is even capable of reaching space, AC to condition the temperature of your home making your stay extremely comfortable, etc.

I have lived for 17 years in this world now, but I still missed the easy life back there. 

My yearning for that kind of life had been ignited after the appearance of this man. Just a bit though, but that's not what's important right now.

I look towards my left side, the man in question was carrying a bag, which was filled with the materials for my Dango business. He was currently patting the nine-tailed fox that he named Syri while he had that gentle smile plastered on his face. 

*Doki Doki*

My heart began beating fast as I saw him make that expression.

'My gosh! He's so hot ❤'

Kuhum. I'm not an easy woman, okay?

In my defense, back there in my home in this world, there were a lot of guys who are not only just gifted in their physics but also excelled in facial appearance. I'm saying that I've seen a lot of handsome dudes back there but they couldn't make me squeal and feel my heart swoon just like this man beside me.

I know the feeling I have right now is more than just a 'like'. 

I met him just today.

I know it's ridiculous but my feelings were to the point of having an intimate affection towards the dude; it's love. 

I know the reason for it.

I'll tell you a story of my past life. 

There were only two people who I love. 

They were my mother and a certain boy. 

First is my mom. My mother raised me alone since birth, I had no dad, I don't want to talk about him. 

She was my best friend who I can lean on and share vibes with. I love my mom, she was my only family back then. 

Growing up, I met a boy. He was someone who competed with me for the top honors position which I hadn't cared about. We didn't interact that much with each other. Our relationship was just that of being classmates. 

We became close right after the awkward meeting when I was in junior high at that time.

'Hehehe ~ That was embarrassing.'

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I don't want to talk about that stuff so let's move on. 

This boy was someone who I had become close to after he helped me back then. We had a lot of time with each other's company which was initiated by just a simple 'paying-the-favor', as I was grateful for his help that time.

We started to hang out, watch movies and animes together, eat lunch, and to the point that I was inviting him to my home and spending time with him doing whatever clicked in our minds. We didn't do any lewd stuff though. I had yet to fall for him. I treated him as just a friend.

My first impression of him was that he was a cold indifferent guy. He has this vacant look in his eyes that's like saying he doesn't care about his surroundings.

But after I became close to him and have known him more, I found out that he was a kind and caring guy. He was a warm person. 

There was a time I was harassed by a group of boys and girls, but he came to my rescue and beat the shit out of them. He didn't spare anyone, girls included.

That was the start when I fell for him.

He was a cool guy but one peculiar thing about him was that he was a momma's boy. 

His mother, I respect her but real talk, she was a bitch who was like putting a leash on his son like he was a dog to do what she bids. 

I know that she wants to teach his son what she thinks is best, but the way she was doing it, was suffocating to me at least. Then that led to the boy becoming unable to express what he wants because he was limited by his mother. 

He changed though, after the end of our summer vacation just as we were going to become high school students. And I liked him even more after that.

I went on several dates with him. We became intimate, like holding hands, for example, hugging but we haven't kissed though, or more than that.

We did all these things but, I didn't know he was a dense motherfucker! I sent him several hints but none of these reached him. I wanted him to be the one to ask me out so that we could become an official couple. It was obvious that he liked me too, so I waited for him. But no, he didn't even realize his feelings. 

Maybe the reason for this was because we were too comfortable with each other that we started to act like lovers without even being one. 

I wanted that label. I want to become official with him. Sadly, we graduated high school without closure in our relationship. 

Two days, after high school graduation, I decided to confront him and confess my feelings once and for all. But later that day I was met with a piece of very heartbreaking news.

Shin, the only boy who I loved, died. The cause of death was that he committed suicide.

Learning about this news, I was stricken with several emotions: regret, grief, and anger.

I regret that I haven't confessed earlier and maybe thought things wouldn't have ended up that way. 

I became depressed. My heart was shattered into pieces. It was broken. It hurt a lot. 

And then I hated him for leaving me behind. I couldn't even bring myself to attend his funeral.

Months passed and it was the start of college. But I stopped going to school and became a full-time NEET. I distracted myself with binge-watching animes. I was affected by his death.

My mom became worried about me. She quit her job and started a bakery so that she can look after me. She was good at making dessert so she sell a lot.

My mom was there for me. Even though I know she doesn't like anime because she was a JollyWood enthusiast, she still watched it with me. I lean on her that time. She was my pillar of support.

…

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