Chapter 72: Chapter 65 – My girlfriend would murder you

When private armies were outlawed eighty years ago, the Kraej Army supposedly disbanded, but all they really did was to rebrand themselves as monster hunters.

―Author unknown, anti-Kraej pamphlet

Asteria

One down, two more to go.

Oren’s group killed the first Iah spawn easily. Ravn had a few minor injuries, but it was nothing that Sofia and I couldn’t fix. He was up and about the next day. Oren and the others combed the abandoned mine for a few more days. They didn’t tell me the specifics, but I knew that they’d found many clues about Oren’s missing sibling. Based on my knowledge of the game, the baby or fetus had been used for human experimentation.

The Kraej Company’s EL Project was only the public face of the numerous unethical experiments the company had done on willing and unwilling human subjects. In “Tales of Vesterland,” Dierk Kraej had claimed to be unaware of the extent of his scientists’ sins but I, and most other players, judged this to be a lie. However, it was true that he had purged his company’s most radical elements around ten years ago.

I wasn’t sure where this plot was going since the game hadn’t mentioned anything about Oren’s family. They had died at the opening cinematic along with the rest of the residents of his and Katja’s hometown.

The important bit was that they’d defeated the first Iah boss. Now it was my turn to cleanse the virus from the mines.

After we finished dinner, the two couples wandered off into the woods for some alone time. I was left at the campfire with Israfel.

“It’s just you and me,” said Israfel.

“I’m not going on a moonlight walk with you,” I said.

“My girlfriend would murder you,” he said.

In fact, I did remember something about Israfel’s girlfriend, a minor character who showed up in one of the later games. She was a sniper.

I got up.

“Where are you going?” asked Israfel.

“Toilet,” I said. “Don’t follow me.”

One of the villagers had allowed us the use of his outdoor toilet for a fee. I took one of the flashlights and made my way there, but I didn’t really need to use it. That was just a convenient excuse. I went inside and shut the door, locking it from the inside.

This was going to hurt a lot. Teleportation via Spirit Incarnate always did.

“Here goes nothing,” I said. One disincarnation and reincarnation later and I was lying on the ground inside the mine. “Oh, dear goddess.”

It hurt worse than I remembered. I could feel that I was near a large clump of the active Iah virus. I breathed shallowly and cast the Rite of Cleansing over the entire underground mine. There was no point in taking any chances.

Bright golden light filled the air around me. It would be visible to the people aboveground, but I’m sure they’ll chalk it up to the usual “haunted mine” shenanigans.

Done.

One last Spirit Incarnate and I materialized inside the toilet. Less than an hour had passed, and I was tired but happy when I made my way back to the campfire.

“That took a long time,” said Israfel. He’d seemed suspicious of me these past few days.

“Hush,” I said. “Don’t comment on a lady’s habits.”

“Eat more banans,” said Israfel. Banans were this world’s bananas and they were said to aid in digestion.

“Good night, Israfel,” I said. I took my bedroll and laid it out near the fire.

I hoped the other two bosses would be as easy as this one. Next up was either the underwater or hidden laboratory boss. Since I’d settled things with Magnus, I should just go ahead and point the hero in the right direction.

***

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“This is the life!” said Katja.

Katja, Sofia, and I raised our glasses and toasted to that. Then we went up to the yacht’s flybridge with our drinks. We were on Magnus’ yacht, one of the biggest superyachts in the world, with five decks, seven lavishly appointed staterooms, and a helipad.

The crazy thing was that this wasn’t even the Kraej family’s biggest yacht. This was just the one that Magnus’ parents had given him when their new megayacht was built. Ravn was practically foaming at the mouth when he described Dierke Kraej’s new pleasure yacht that had a three-level atrium, fitness center, glass-bottomed swimming pool, cinema, spa, beauty rooms, elevator, medical suite, library, and who knew what else. It was normally shadowed by two support vessels that carried additional helicopters, fishing boats, sailboats, kayaks, landing gear, etc.

Worst of all, according to Ravn, was that Dierke Kraej has never even used the yacht!

“If the Kraej are too busy to play on their yachts, I’m more than happy to do it for them,” I said to the other two.

I’d slathered on copious amounts of sunscreen and was dressed in a high-necked, long-sleeved dress that went down to my feet. Sunglasses and a hat completed my “the sun is the enemy” look. I wasn’t keen on getting freckles.

Katja and Sofia, on the other hand, were wearing bikinis and lounging on the sunpads on the flybridge while I rested in the shade.

“I could get used to this,” said Katja.

The day after they had finished exploring the mine, I could tell that Oren and the others were downcast. They wouldn’t tell me the details, but they must have hit a roadblock of some sort. That was when I suggested that we take a minivacation on Magnus’ yacht.

After a short, whispered consultation a few feet away from me, Oren accepted my invitation. The boys were supposedly in Aarlborg “having fun” aka “getting drunk,” but I knew they were really off to scout the nearby military base while the girls kept me occupied.

I’ll leave the matter of the submarine to Magnus while I rest with Katja and Sofia. I’m sure that the girls had been ordered to stay here to distract me while the menfolk went off to try to check how they could hijack a submarine, but I didn’t mind. I was exhausted from running around the continent stalking the hero, so a day of rest was nice.

“So spill it,” I said to Katja. “What’s up with you and Ravn?”

Sofia giggled. I was sticking to fruit juice, but the other two were having fruity cocktails, so even though it was only a few hours after breakfast, they were already quite tipsy.

“He’s nice,” said Katja.

“Oh my gosh,” said Sofia. “They kissed when Ravn got injured. There was tongue and all.”

“He’s a good kisser,” said Katja. She was grinning widely.

“What about Oren? Is he a good kisser, too?” I asked Sofia.

She sighed. “I don’t know.”

“Aw, you poor thing. Still no progress there, huh?” Katja shook her head. “You just have to grab him by the collar and kiss him until his knees go weak.”

“Is that what you did?” I asked Katja.

Katja smirked. “Yes, indeed. What about you and Seraph?”

“We’re just friends,” I said.

“Still?” Katja clicked her tongue. “You two girls are hopeless.”

“Why do we have to talk about the boys all the time? Tell me what your plans are, Katja, Sofia. What are you going to do when your mission is over?”

“I’m going back to my temple, of course. The people I left in charge told me that people donated enough for me to live on for life,” said Sofia.

The people of Kraej City knew that they had the Parian shield artifact to thank for their lives, and they had shown their appreciation by showering the temple with donations.

“I have no idea what I’m going to do next. I’m living in the moment!” said Katja.

We chatted until noon when the boys came back to the yacht for lunch.