Chapter 37: Ch. 36 – The Escape

Dusk slinked between the bars of the cage, prowling towards the knight. Momo had learned that if she concentrated hard enough on the cat’s movements, she could see the slightest outline in its form. Just as the vampire had stepped between shadows, Dusk reflected light back at the viewer, leaving small visual artifacts in the space between.

Momo furrowed her eyebrows. She had no idea how she knew all of that. It sounded like something she might have learned in a Materials class back in art school, but she was asleep for like 90% of that course. It seemed these intellect points even worked in retrospect - dredging up memories that had been long covered in neuron cobwebs.

As the patrol guard turned on his heel, an invisible paw reached up and swatted the key ring. It emitted a faint jingle, and Momo’s hands went to her mouth, eyes bulging in horror. Luckily, the room was a cacophony of noise and conversation. The guards didn’t seem to notice.

“Come on, Dusk, we didn’t do those hamstring stretches for nothing,” Momo muttered nervously through her fingers, anxiously watching the cat make a second attempt, “put your back paws into it.”

Dusk jumped, catching the key in her mouth. The keyring gave way, unhooking from the belt on Dusk's descent. With the keys in her jaws, she pranced back towards the cage, sliding through the bars.

“That’s my little hero,” Momo cheered quietly, taking the keys from her and shoving them in her robe pocket. Some prisoners in other cages had caught on - watching the keyring float itself into their cage, but luckily they knew better than to speak up. Teddy gave the pair of them an impressed thumbs up.

“I might have to borrow her for some heists I’m planning,” Radu said, sitting in awe. “She’s sneakier than my best Rogue.”

“She doesn’t do freelance work, sorry,” Momo said, scratching behind the cat’s ears. “She likes to keep it in-house.”

“Right,” Radu laughed. “But seriously, what kind of cat can go invisible? I’ve never seen an animal companion with that power before. It must have some unique class.”

Momo’s pulse quickened. “Special class? Oh, no, it’s just an um, enchanted… collar.”

“Wouldn’t I see the collar, if she was wearing one?”

“Um.. No, obviously not,” Momo coughed, “because it’s also invisible.”

“You somehow came across an [Invisible Collar of Invisibility]?”

“...Yes,” she affirmed, deadpan. “I was cleaning my room and then, boom, I was like – what is this thing? An invisible object? Maybe I should try putting it on my cat.”

He stared at her blankly.

Momo’s cheeks flushed. She was a terrible liar.

“My keys are gone!”

The guard slapped his hand around his belt, feeling for his key ring. When he couldn’t locate it, his face grew as red as a cherry tomato.

“One of those dirty sleuthing criminals took my keys!”

The other patrolling knight turned to him. “What? There’s no way. Not a single soul has moved from the cages.”

“They must have! My keys were here a second ago, and now they’re gone.”

“Hand them to me,” Radu whispered harshly as the knights began to go cell to cell, throwing open the doors and performing full searches on each prisoner.

Momo fished them nervously from her pocket, covertly handing them to the lizard. He hid behind Momo’s back, beginning to fiddle with his cuffs.

“There’s like seventy keys on this thing,” he groaned, “you’ll need to keep lookout while I try them.”

Momo nodded, beginning to sweat. She couldn’t believe she was trading the comfort of her cell for a one-way ticket to the judgment chamber. This is what happened when she let people talk her into things.

She kept her eyes trained on the knights, who were only a few cells away now. They left bruised bodies in their wake, the lesser con artists trembling with fear as they approached their cell.

“Please hurry up,” Momo whined, bobbing her knee nervously, “I do not want to get poked with one of those longswords today. I don’t think my malnourished body even has the capability to heal wounds anymore.”

“Shh, stop complaining,” he whispered. “I only have a few keys left, so one of them has to be –”

Momo heard something click, and the cuffs rattled to the ground.

“What was that?” a knight shouted, snapping his head in their direction. “Septim, I think I heard one of these slippery slimes get out of their chains.”

“You guys give the weirdest nicknames,” Radu groaned, flexing his arms. “Anyhow, prepared to die?”

Momo yelped, stepping backwards. She didn’t want to get in the way of anything that started with that opening line. Dusk scurried back with her, and the reptilian man stepped forward, jutting his palms out.

“Septim, it’s one of the dangerous ones! Take cover!”

The knights scrambled, losing their footing in their panic. They tripped over themselves as they headed towards the entrance, falling in a clump of heavy metal.

Radu laughed, lowering his hands. “Gods, I was just going to [Charm] you into fighting each other, but this is just embarrassing. Momo, why don’t you take care of them? I’ll conserve my powers for later.”

Momo blushed, feeling like she had just been called up to the whiteboard in class. Take care of them? She barely knew how to say her own name out loud.

“I - uh, I’m —”

Recovering from their shock, the knight's fear turned to fury. They pulled away from each other, and once again regained their stance, pointing their swords outwards.

“That small one? Please. She is nothing more than a street orphan! I could tap her with my finger and she’d fall to pieces.”

“I could spit on her and she’d turn to dust!”

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“I could so much as blow in her direction and she’d fly away like a feeble kite!”

The insults fell heavier than usual on her shoulders, and Momo’s lip quivered. Something inside her writhed. It was a feeling entirely new to her - like emotional indigestion. She knew they were right, but she… didn’t want them to be. She felt possessed to move towards them. To arch her shoulders back, and employ her new guiding principle:

WWVD. What Would Valerica Do.

“My name is not ‘the small one’,” she demanded, trying with all her might to sound like she wasn't five seconds away from curling up into a ball.

“Oh yeah, what is it then?” Septim jeered, bearing his teeth.

“My name is Momo,” she inhaled, and then stepped towards them, “Momo The Ripper.”

She projected every confident cell in her body towards that single line. To her great surprise, their confident expressions faltered. It wasn’t quite a James Bond level of intimidation, but the knights’ faces went as white as sheet paper.

“...The Ripper?”

“Did we misjudge her?” Septim said, voice wavering. “Is she one of them?”

They began to slowly retreat, their eyes glowing with fear. Momo couldn’t believe it, taken aback by their reaction. She had actually scared someone! Admittedly, these two knights seemed to panic faster than the world’s smallest prey animal, but it was a start. It was something.

One small step for Momo, one huge feat for Momokind.

“She has to be bluffing.”

I absolutely am, she thought, resisting the call of the fetal position. But she had defeated a vampire. She could deal with a couple mousey knights, too.

She shifted her feet, thrusting her hands out towards them.

“Momo The Ripper specialty move,” she shouted, “[Abysmal Burst II]!”

The knights shrieked as the sizzling ball of dark energy surged at them. Their faces went from white to ashen gray, their hair standing straight up, electrified. They were splayed in a mass of limbs, looking like they had just been leveled by a cannonball.

“Oh, gosh,” Momo whispered to herself, worrying her lip, “did I too much? I didn’t mean to kill them.”

Septim’s eyes snapped open, and he managed a last trembling plea.

“Please! We surrender, oh great Ripper! Let us live!”

The knights got down on their knees, laying their hands down in a praying pose. Momo’s eyes widened. This was new. Her temporary confidence faltered, unsure how to respond.

“I - um, I’ll think about it,” Momo mumbled.

“Thank you, merciful Ripper!”

“Um, anytime.”

“Alright, Ripper, let’s get going,” Radu laughed, tugging her sleeve. He threw the keyring through one of the cages, and yelled back towards Teddy. “You can deal with the rest of the slimes, me and the Ripper will excavate a path out of here!”

“Thanks boss,” Teddy waved, his froggy lips turning into an eerie smile.

As Momo and Radu headed up the stairs out of the jailhouse, Radu abruptly lurched to the side, taking Momo with him. She yelped, but he covered her mouth, holding a finger to his lips. With wide eyes, she watched as a patrol of guards passed in front of them.

Peering around the corner, Momo took in their new surroundings. The stairs to the jailhouse gave way to the central hallway of the larger knight hall. The guards walked along a long, red carpet, a chained, handcuffed boy in tow behind them.

“They’re headed to the Head Knight’s Judgement Room,” Radu said, once they were out of earshot. The one leading the pack is one of Vivienne’s personal knights - Bagan. We don’t want to mess with him if we can avoid it.”

“I would like to avoid messing with anything and everyone, forever, actually."

Radu smirked. “That’s not what it seemed like back there. You didn’t even need my help.”

“Well, I warned you,” Momo stuttered, “I rip people.”

“I still don’t believe that.”

“Fine,” Momo mumbled, and slid against the wall she was leaning on. As she entered a sitting position, a piece of parchment flew with supersonic speed down the hallway, parking itself in Momo’s hands.

Radu’s eyes widened. “Is that always how your parchment comes in?”

“Uh, yes?” Momo quirked her head. “Isn’t that normal?”

“Um, absolutely not,” Radu said. “Mine just… materializes in my hands. That’s how it is for most people. I’ve heard of some people whose Couriers have a special personality, but that’s… very rare.”

He looked at her strangely. Momo looked away, not fond of being gawked at. She opted to inspect the paper in her hand instead.

Oh - wow. She grinned, wide as a whale. She did it.

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