Let me kindly summarize the state of my life right now for everyone who has forgotten:
Yikes. What a great outlook for my nerves.
My elder sister, Haru the fujoshi, was purring as she showed me her newest manga draft, a few pages depicting my summary of the scene where he had kissed me.
I didn’t need a mirror to know I was visibly blushing for once and looking quite funny with my awkwardly hanging jaw.
“I would love to upload it, but you’d get mad”, she hummed in disappointment, caressing her artwork.
I looked everywhere but at it.
“Don’t you dare”, I hissed with a threatening tone. "I don't want my face on the internet!"
“Could I upload it once you two get together?”
I loved her optimism. I had already been kissed by my crush and had a game system in my vision that told me he liked me and I was still doubting even the possibility of us going out, ever.
Does that make sense? Maybe not, but it's not like my brain felt the need to do so.
“Let’s talk if it ever comes that far.”
She rolled her eyes and leaned on her hand. “Don’t be like that, Riku. You’ve got a whole lot of time with him during the charity event, you just gotta make sure to stick to him. He’ll get the message. Even you should not be able to fuck that up.”
Hmmmmmm. I doubt that.
Don't underestimate my ability to fuck things up when they should be easy!
Our school’s charity event would span over three weeks where we had shortened lessons, right after the midterm exams. It looked nice on our certificates. For the event, we could form groups ourselves and decide not only where we wanted to help, but also how. You could just gather money or help with work, but the project was documented and graded, so you wouldn’t want to keep it small just to skip labour.
Right before the exams, I had filled out the group sheet to be together with my friends, my crush and the guy who I’m pretty sure is my love rival, in some way.
That meant I only had one stupid weekend to calm my mind before I would already have to see Mizuki on Monday and deal with the fact that we’d probably have a really awkward and ambiguous atmosphere going on.
On the other hand, maybe not. Mizuki was great at keeping his nonchalant poker-face or frosty frown so I certainly had to consider the possibility of him not having a visible reaction to me, at all.
I couldn’t say the same for me, though.
“What, stick to him… He’ll just get annoyed.”
I was mumbling with my head tilted down, fiddling with the corner of Haru’s bedsheet.
My sister laughed sweetly, clicking her tongue with a wagging finger. “You need to be a gentleman. Offer to help him when he needs it, watch out for his mood. Just be attentive. You know what I mean? I’m not telling you to act weird, just make sure you know you’re not avoiding him but care for him.”
A simple but logical tactic. Also, theoretically not that hard for me to do. The main point was showing him I wasn’t avoiding him because of the kiss, and the other point was doing things that would make it obvious I was paying a lot of attention to him.
I hoped to get around all of that confession stuff for a while. My heart wouldn’t be able to take it.
If we could just have a comfortable mood between us, then that would be nice already… I really didn’t have the head for working out a relationship right now!
I just wanted to get through a group-work with my crush and a guy I just can’t stand!
Especially since he looks so much better with Mizuki than I do, waaaah... orz
“I think you should go shopping with Daichi sometimes”, Haru said out of nowhere. “You need other clothes. You won’t look good standing next to Taizou with your usual look.”
No kidding, I knew that already.
“Are you planning on informing our whole family about this?”, I growled unhappily. A supportive family was nice and all, but I didn’t like this. I didn’t want that much attention!
“Risa would love it”, Haru said, pointing her thumb into the direction of my little sister’s room. Damn those rotten girls.
“Wouldn’t you rather like some beauty to go out with Mizuki? For eye-candy?” I raised my eyebrows at her, glancing at her drawings. Even there did I look normal.
Instead, she laughed. “That would be nice, but I like the awkward nice guy x calm cold guy setting! It’s fluffy!”
What the fuck are you even talking about.
“I really can’t talk to you.”
She gave me a beautiful grin showing off her white teeth. Bah. I really don’t like how your genes turned out so different from mine.
Pouting and rolling my eyes, I stepped out of the room and back to my own where I started my computer, checking whether my friends were online. I went into the voice chat.
“Yo, you all free?”
“Sure are.” “What’s up! Finally rested enough?”
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“Yeah, exams really knocked me out.”
And the kiss. Probably more the kiss than the exams.
“I feel you. Yuji was dragged away by his cousin, so it’s just the three of us. Wanna do some other quest?”
The game we usually played was another MMORPG where we had formed a small guild. One of the guild quests we were currently doing was linked to the main storyline of the game, so we didn’t want to continue it without Yuji. There were still more than enough others we could do.
“Yeah, let’s wait until he’s got time. Wasn’t there some quest that was mostly grinding? Let’s do that one, it’ll be nice to relieve some stress.”
Their voices reached my ears directly through the headset.
“We’re waiting ingame already.”
The game started with its usual short opening showing the game’s name and then I hurried to load my main character.
Tarou’s warrior and Kaoru’s necromancer waved at me when my mage loaded and I pressed the button to wave back jokingly.
“There you are. I’ve already accepted the quest, let’s go right away.”
We already had the closest teleport point for the quest, so everything went quite smoothly. Just randomly bashing the game’s monsters was really calming. I sighed happily.
“Things have been so stressful lately.”
“Agreed.”
We’re not talking about the same thing but yep. We all had some hard days.
I hummed as they talked, quickly taking a bottle from the side to drink something. I glanced over at my cell phone which rang with a beautiful sound - and spat out my drink, coughing badly.
“You alive? Did you choke?” “Breeaaaathe, Riku. Breaaaathe.”
I managed to cough out the fluid that had nearly gone down the wrong pipe and reached out for my phone with tears blurring my eyes.
‘Riku, Ive just seen Taizou with a handsome guy!! It kinda looked like they were kissing! Whats up with that?’
I cursed loudly into the microphone at Risa’s message. I knew she was out in the city somewhere with her friends and I was certain that while she was often annoyed with me, she wouldn’t toy with me like that.
“Guys, I need a minute!” “Sure. Just use the follow function.”
Tarou was cooperative enough and I let my character run after his automatically before taking off the headset and rolling away to call Risa. Her voice was annoyed when she answered.
“I’m out with my friends!”
“I know! But tell me what the fuck you saw!”
She hmpf-ed. I could almost see her curl her long, dyed-reddish blonde hair around a finger.
“We’re at the cinema, just got out of a movie. I saw someone who I’m sure is Taizou in a darker corner of the movie theater and some other guy super close to him. He looked way better than you, just saying. Also, he felt kinda familiar. I don't gotta tell you what that means.”
“Fuck, can’t you even support your own brother?!”
“...I am, aren’t I? Otherwise I wouldn’t have told you. Anyway, not like I could stay and watch. My friends are waiting. I don’t know anything else, so bye.”
The phone clicked when she ended the call and I stared at it with wide eyes. Couldn’t you have taken a photo or something! Just what exactly did you see! Did you assume because of the angle, or did you actually see them kissing?!
I chewed on my lip and rolled back to my table with a dark face. When my friends saw my character move independently again, they welcomed me back.
“Everything fine?”
“Not at all.”
“Wow, that’s one irritated tone you’ve got there. What’s up? Share with us.”
I hesitated for a bit, then sighed in resignation. At least some of the truth, then.
“I’ve got a crush on someone and we’re getting along really well but it’s possible my rival is currently making his move. Physically.” I was grumbling. I had no doubt that if there was another guy with Mizuki, it was the president.
“What!! Before I even start defending you by cursing that other guy, how come you never told us you had a crush?!” Tarou was audibly pouting but Kaoru just dragged a long ‘Oh.’
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