Chapter 59: Kouta has a nightmare

//Author:  Volume 2 begins.//

I woke up in a panic, gasping for air which isn’t coming into my lungs fast enough. I am being held lovingly by two of my night blossoms, yet I shake them off completely as I sit up and try to draw a ragged breath. My sudden panicked movements have woken them.

I scramble out from the futon and crawl towards the door, barely making it off the futon before my stomach empties its contents onto the floor between the futon and the door.

Puaaaaaahrrgh~

huff…  gasp… huff… wheeze…

W..what the fuck was that nightmare?

I suddenly feel a warm soothing hand rubbing my bare back.

It’s Ruru.  Ruru’s touch is what I’m feeling.  She is the first to respond to my unstable state.

“Kouta-kun, are you okay?” she asks with concern.

The other two night blossoms also join Ruru who is doing her best to comfort me as I try and hold on to consciousness from lack of air and my body forcing me to vomit.

Kanae has quickly stepped past me, heading out the room, dodging my pool of vomit carefully to retrieve something to clean it up.  It wouldn’t be the first time she has had to do this for me.

I can’t look at either of my two remaining flowers. I’m on my hands and knees, and I want to vomit more, but I’m also fighting it.  Trying to keep it down.  All I can do is gasp and pant, and try and keep my heart from coming up my throat as well.

it’s only Ruru who is physically touching me.  Shi-chan is right next to me, however I’m suddenly afraid of her being there.

Why?

The memories of the dream are fading but I can remember some of it.

We were readying to return to school, and I had asked her that question.  The one I really didn’t want to know the answer to.  Instead of her usual deflection about it, with concern to what I should know, she told me directly and without filtration.

She told me all about what she had done. All the people she had done it with. That while we were together, she had done those things with others, in spite of everything.

So many… it was an unreal number… I simply couldn’t handle it. My mind broke.

It shifted to me getting dressed and was walking with her to school … We weren’t holding hands.  I was upset and angry. My mind produced a bunch of horrible images… and once we arrived…. that was it.

The result of that stressful dream is now in a viscous state, pooled underneath my chin.

I’m still taking heavy breaths of air. I feel a body hug me as best it can from the side.

It’s Shi-chan.

“Kouta?” She calls my name out of concern, finally.

I am shaking, and have barely the power to hold myself up. So she pulls me to collapse on my side, and hugs me from behind.  I can feel her warm naked breasts trying to send me a signal of comfort as she tries to meld her body into mine, passing her warmth into me.

I realize my son is rock hard at this moment.  It has been since I snapped awake.

Why?

Why do you react that way, my son? 

Does knowing about her having done that kind of thing with others, intrigue you so much?

…

Her hand runs along the front of my chest in soothing circles, as I can feel the churning in my stomach finally calm down a little.

My breathing slowly returns to normal, but the taste in my mouth is hideous. I want to wash my mouth out.

“Would you like to talk about it, Kouta?”

The voice is Nakada-san’s.

Do I want to talk about it?

I tried talking about it in a dream just now, and it led to this result.   At least in a dream, what  heard could be dispelled as just my overactive imagination.  If she were to say it here… those things... there can be no erasure. I would know. 

How badly would I really be affected then?

“Shiori… I’m sorry, I had a nightmare with you in it.   I’ll be alright.  Just give me a little bit of time.” There are tears in my eyes. My eyes are red and watery, no doubt.

Ruru has also latched on to me in the front, and is kissing my chest, and pushing her small frame into me, together with Shi-chan, they are sandwiching me with support and care.

“I’m sorry Kouta.  If it was something about me to cause you to react like this, I’m sorry.” Shi-chan is crying for me.

I feel terrible.

For all kinds of reasons, I feel terrible.

“It’s time after all, isn’t it?” she says with a shaky voice. “To have that talk.”

“No!  No... please don’t.. say anything.”

I can’t. If you tell me now, I’ll die. I really will.

So she stays silent at my plea.

She runs some fingers through my hair, for a while, then gets up. Kanae has already begin to clean up everything, Shi-chan assists Kanae where she can.

Onee-chan… Onee-chan will take care of it, like always.  I can count on her.  Sorry to always be a burden on you, Onee-chan.

…

When I’m a bit calmer, Shi-chan heads to the living room, and begins her delinquent activity, to calm herself as well at my sudden behavior tonight.

Afterwards, I feel Ruru move away as well. Her body is replaced by another.

“Kouta, come into my chest.”

It’s Onee-chan.

I bury myself into her, and feel myself slowly getting myself together.  It’s an embrace that is free of judgment.  It’s only love.  Love from the one who has known me for the longest.

I cry.

“Kouta.  Let it out.  Tell your Onee-chan everything.”

So I do.

She holds me so carefully.

I love Kanae so much.

…

“Close the door for a moment.” Kanae says to whoever is there. I can’t see, my eyes are buried into her chest.

I can only hear the sound of the door being shut.

“Onee-chan… I had a nightmare… I wasn’t strong enough…” I say as I shake unsteadily.

She pulls me closer into her, I can feel her entire body’s warmth, and her slow heartbeat.

“In the dream.. Shi-chan told me all her past… every one who she’s slept with… that even while we have been together.. she still has been sleeping… with others…”

I sob heavily.

I am really shaking a great deal.  I thought I was strong, but this small dream has provoked the mass insecurities I have mercilessly to the front of my mind.

“It’s okay Kouta.  Just rest, okay.  Let’s get you back in the futon, and lay down.  I’ll go talk with Shi-chan.  Shall I send Ruru in?”

Do I want to be alone?

“Please, let me be alone for a few minutes.”

“Alright Kouta.  I’ll be back in a little while.”

“Thanks Onee-chan.”

She kisses my forehead then exits the room.

The door is cracked slightly.

I can see Shi-chan is smoking and being consoled too by Onee-chan now. Did I hurt her by saying the nightmare was about her?

They’ve begun talking, but it’s at a volume I can’t hear.

Will you find out what I can’t bear to, Onee-chan?

…

Onee-chan.

In my moment of weakness, I couldn’t call her Kana-chan.  Though she said she has broken her sisterly bonds with me, so that the taboo things we have done wouldn’t hit so hard or strangely, it seems I just cannot accept it entirely.

We’ve done a lot.  But I’ve never allowed myself to cross that line.

I don’t know if I ever will.

It’s been more than a few minutes, but this time the person who enters the room is none other than Shi-chan herself.

I’m lying down, but she is sitting next to me. The smell of cigarettes and cucumber fill my senses. She’s not saying a thing, but reaches for my hand.

You are reading story Nakada-san To Ren’ai at novel35.com

I allow her to take it, and we interlock fingers, and squeeze each other’s hands for a while. After our connection stabilizes, she finally talks.

“My words will be no good here, Kouta,  even if they can ease your heart. I would like to assure you there is nothing to worry about since we have met that day at Kii-chan’s.  So instead, I will surrender this body to you if you would like instead. Right here, right now.  You can love me, you can punish me, vent your anger, frustration, whatever will help you feel better.  I will accept your judgment, even if it was from a dream.  To ease your heart a tiny bit, that’s all I want to do.”

Shi-chan is right.  There are no words I want to hear from her. Even if it’s the truth and they leave me without worry.

“I will accept any and all of your feelings.  I will take all of it from you, Kouta.  From the moment you took me as your woman, I am entirely your privilege to use as you see fit.  Do you want to ensure it?  Will that help you knowing you have complete ownership of my body and heart?”

I want to.

But not like that.  I don’t want to injure you because of my own insecurity.

I crawl into her chest, and place my head between her firm breasts. Saying only a single word.

“Mine…”

I say it greedily. Many times. I know I’m not her first.  I know my place must be quite down the list.  But I’m her number one right now.  This has been drilled into me, yet I cannot comprehend the true meaning of it.

“Un. I belong only to Kouta.”

…

The other flowers return, after a while, though the sleeping arrangement is now lost. I fall asleep in Shiori’s nakedness, and she holds me throughout the rest of the night.

When I wake up, there are no kisses.  Only a gentle caressing of my head.  

“Good morning, sleepyhead.”

Shi-chan is still awake.  She is comforting me still, and perhaps has throughout the entire night.

I lower myself to her thighs, and inhale the scent of my woman.

One deep breath.

Two deep breaths.

Three deep breaths.

Her legs slide, opening the passageway. I bury my face in her. She closes her legs around my head. There is deprivation of all sense but smell.

Her scent is that relaxing one of cucumbers and womanhood. I open my mouth and drink in of her body’s nectar.

There is nothing but Shiori in my world now. My world of worries and insecurities are gone. There is only acceptance now.

I lick and I suck, and I even bite. Anywhere and everywhere I can blindly grab with my mouth.

It’s just that.  

I wasn’t aiming to give her any pleasure.  Every bit of her was mine to enjoy.  And so I did.  When I was satisfied enough, I retreated from her place, and sat upright, staring into her golden orbs, which reflected only me.  I returned to her chest, and she embraced me softly once more.

“Does Kouta feel better now?”

I did feel much better.

I’m still nervous about what I don’t want to know, but know I will have to someday.  I am anxious because this relationship is quite intense with her and everyone else involved.

I’m still a nervous child.  Only recently did I graduate into adulthood, but I am clearly not ready for it.

“Thank you, Shiori.”

“Go wake up the girls, I’m going to take a nap.  Will you wake me up not too late?”

I give her a kiss on the lips.

“Sorry I’m such a crybaby husband.”

“Kouta is a good boy.  More than this wife deserves.”

So I get up from Shiori, rinse my mouth in the bathroom sink, then return to wake up the other flowers of my garden.

I nestled my head in Kana-chan’s bosom which comforted me greatly last night.  I gently run my hands along her body, and whisper lovingly into her ear.

“Hime of my heart.  Thank you for your care last night.”

“Mm.. Kouta.”

She takes me in her sisterly embrace, then whispers back to me. “I know you have difficulty, but will you make time for just me later today?”

…

“I will.”

She lets me off with a soft kiss on the nose.

Next I move to Ruru.

She’s so small.  I start from her thighs and kiss her slowly all the way up, enjoying her slender frame, her soft stomach, devoid of visible abs, her cute and sweet undeveloped mounds which have reacted to my handiwork on her body so far.  Up her neck and to her mouth, where she was awake and awaiting me.

Our kiss is soft and passionate.  She wraps her legs around my body, pulling my son to her adult pool, wanting him to dive in the deep end.

“Kouta-kun!” She says happily to me this morning.

“My precious lily, thank you for caring for me as well last night.”

We join together.

She feels so inviting.

It’s not morning sex, just a union of our bodies.

It wouldn’t be fair to Nakada-san who cared for me the whole night long to just violate this lily in front of her.

...even though I want to!

So I slide out from inside her sweet flowerpot, and help my two night blossoms dress for the day.

Afterwards, I help Shi-chan into the futon, which still had traces of warmth, and covered her up, giving her a soft kiss goodnight.

As she lay down, I held her hand until she quickly passed into slumber.

I left the room, and began my morning.

There were three days until school resumed. 

Breakfast that morning was a buttered pasta dish with mushrooms, and garlic bread.  It was late, so it fell into lunch territory as it was.

Kanae didn’t bother to snap any photos. instead she wanted to talk with me.

“Kouta.  I wouldn’t worry too much, okay?  I had a talk with Shi-chan.  I think you’ll be able to handle it, if you go slowly.”

…

“What about Kana-chan?”

“Like Kouta, Shi-chan is my lover too.  I don’t care.  It could be a thousand times worse, but as long as she is there in our bed Kouta… My heart is happy she loves me too.”

How are you so strong, Kanae?

“Ruru also thinks the same.  Kouta shouldn’t worry.  If it gets hard, then come to me.  I will be your sanctuary until you can come to terms with it.  Shi-chan is also okay with that.  She knows it will be difficult for you.  That’s really the reason she invited me into our relationship.  It’s what I can offer you.”

… Ruru, you too?

…

“I’m a shitty person.  I know.  I’m sorry I’m so useless as to not understand what love you all constantly show me.”

“We wouldn’t show you it if we didn’t think you were worthwhile, Kouta-kun.” Ruru says as she twirls her fork in the pasta.

Taking a bite, she puts her utensil down and comes over to me, finding a place in my lap.

She pulls my arms around her, and leans her had back on my shoulder, kissing my cheek.

“Do you even know how jealous I am that she got to hold you like that all night?  A~ah. I really wanted to be the one to do that… but it was something she was the best suited for doing.  So I will enjoy my time with Kouta-kun like this, and let him heal me instead, right Kana-chan?” Ruru says cutely.

…

“I’ll be taking a turn later, so enjoy him all you want now.” Kanae says with some benevolent authority in her voice.

“In that case, Kouta-kun, want to read some of what I’m writing?”

“Your new work?”

“Yeah.  I want to get an opinion before I send it, that way I’m prepared for Monday’s meeting.”

“Sure.”

It seems today, Ruru has decided she will sit on my lap.

She’s small and soft, and I just wrap my hands around her like she wants.

She’s my healing factor when it’s rough with Nakada-san?  Picked to be so by that same Nakada-san?

When it gets tough Ruru, please heal me lots.

(Secret 51:  Ruru has been taking pictures of Kouta at night when she can’t sleep, and keeping them stored in a hidden folder for her personal enjoyment. She has one where she stacked a whole bunch of things on him that she likes to laugh at often.)

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