Chapter 141: Book Three Chapter One: Review

Qube was a good Companion. She had spent her entire life under the not-so-gentle guidance of the Golden Prophecy, the text that ordained that her childhood friend would potentially become the one chosen to overthrow the Evil Emperor and restore the rightful rulers to the throne.

 

She’d worked hard to be the very best guiding light ever, to always know what the right thing to do or say was, and to help her friend manifest his destiny. If she closed her eyes, she could still picture the sacred parchment as it last was, before the newly-anointed Hero had bunched it up and shoved it into his backpack.

 

“From humble village a Fighter awakes. 

Then Evil destroys and his heart breaks.

His childhood companion, his guiding light,

He sets off to make the world right.

 

He shall find the forest’s heart.

And steal the fire’s guarded start.

 

He shall make the water cry

Then fall into unbroken sky 

 

And fight the darkness deep inside

And turn away from brightness’ pride.

 

Then find in time’s endless halls

The echoes of his lost ones’ calls.

To slay what once was so adored

So what was lost can be restored.”

 

The words used to be different, more generic, but she couldn’t really remember them. She’d just known that somehow it could be read that the other two potential Chosens, a Rogue and a Wizard, also had a shot at being the selected saviour of all human and human-adjacent beings.

 

Qube was, herself, a human-adjacent being, seeing as she was a half-elf. Growing up, she’d never faced any ill-treatment for not being a human — being selected by the Golden Prophecy as a potential Childhood Companion was prestigious enough that no one had ever treated her with anything less than the utmost respect — but a part of her wondered if things would have been different if she’d ever known her parents.

 

Like all the potentials, her parents had died when she was young. It just seemed to be what happened to parents. Even though both her parents had been half-elves, who were supposed to live a lot longer than humans. It seemed there was no overcoming the curse of birth. Especially, for some reason, mothers.

 

Qube was a Healer, and very interested in childbirth, as she was reasonably certain that she’d recently caused multiple powerful artefacts to have children. The first couple of times had been accidents (not that she would ever tell them that!) but by now she had caused dozens of item-twins to come into existence.

 

Perhaps the mummies standing in front of her had once been mothers. Looking at the slowly shuffling mob of moaning SandBright people accompanying her party as they left the ruins of their desert home, Qube couldn’t help but wonder quite when all the gleaming glory promised to her growing up had been scraped away.

 

It had all started to go wrong when her friend, whose name had apparently been Felix, had become the Chosen One. What she’d expected it to mean was that he would just become a bit stronger, and they would set off on a glorious adventure.

 

What had actually happened was her friend was possessed by a being from another world who seemed to be a bit lax on things like “social graces,” “paying attention to the fate of the world,” and “adhering to reality”.

 

It had taken Qube a while to realise that Felix, the boy she’d grown up with her entire life, had been replaced. It wasn’t exactly something she had been taught to expect and, well, the Golden Prophecy hadn’t exactly been a fan of people asking too many questions or thinking about certain topics too deeply.

 

It had also taken her meeting Mr. Clockwork, the mechanical merchant who resupplied her village, for her to discover that the Chosen One had lied to her about the fate of her home. He’d told her that the Evil Emperor had destroyed the buildings, but left the villagers alive. In reality, only she and the Chosen One were left.

 

And maybe Mr. Igma, the shopkeeper. She wasn’t sure about that.

 

Despite these stumbling blocks in their relationship, the Chosen One and Qube were somehow still friends. While they weren’t childhood companions, she still wanted to help him save the world, and he was working hard to help her be the best version of herself possible. The rest of her party were also very dear to her, even though none of them were anything like what she’d expected either.

 

Squiggles was the team mascot and pet. She was an adorable creature they’d picked up in the Water Temple, and she loved tight hugs and eating things she really shouldn’t. She was the cutest sharktopus ever, with a pretty green ribbon tied around her head, that really brought out the black in her flat, predatory eyes.

 

Definitely Bad Guy was originally a secret agent of the Royals, pretending to be the Mage Advisor for the Evil Emperor. He specialised in fire, curses, and very low-cut robes, and, for reasons that eluded but never failed to embarrass her, had pledged his protection of Qube when she had first accidentally shattered his perception of the world through [Heal]ing him. 

 

Granted, he’d been looking up at the Evil Emperor and been saying a lot of strange things about how he could understand why the Evil Emperor would put a curse of invisibility on her, he would always serve him, and how he would keep her secret, but Qube was wise to how the world worked, and everyone knew that if someone promised to protect you when they first met you it meant that they were desperately in love with you. It was just the way things were.

 

The Hunter of the party was also human-adjacent, although somewhat less adjacent to humanity than Qube. This wasn’t because she had been born a full-blooded Wood Elf, but rather because she was currently semi-permanently stuck in the form of a giant spider with long brown hair, clothing that her flesh occasionally ate, and a bunch of silently-screaming children’s faces stitched into the sides of her abdomen. 

 

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Despite her physical difficulties, however, Sexy Screamy Spider Lady was a firm believer in being herself. Even when that self was a giant spider that sometimes dripped venom.

 

Sewer Bard, named for his initial location and vocation, was a different beast. Not an actual beast, he was probably the most human of the group, but he was currently going through some personal issues. He’d recently attempted to free the tyrannical pharaoh from being compelled to seek vengeance against the people who’d imprisoned him, only to discover that giving people a choice meant having to accept when they chose poorly-thought-out revenge over something sensible, like the power of friendship.

 

It was about the pharaoh, and his identical counterpart, Akela, that Qube wanted to talk to the mummies. She just wasn’t entirely sure how to bring up the man who had terrorised their people to said people. Or, well, once-people.

Wait, were mummies undead? Did that make them automatically Evil? Qube had recently started to question what it was that made someone, or something, Good vs. Evil, and was struggling to recategorise everything under her new line of thinking.

 

“So,” Qube said to the closest mummy, reasoning that once she started talking she would have to find the words to finish the sentence, “how are you?”

 

The mummy ignored her. Oh, that was right. Qube had forgotten for a second that she was invisible.

 

“Sewer Bard,” she asked, calling upon the most diplomatically inclined of their group. “Can you please ask the mummies how they’re feeling about being ruled over by Akela? And also how they would feel about the pharaoh returning to them, but no longer being Evil? Would having a giant golden mask hinder his integration back into their society at all?”

Sewer Bard gave her a strange look, but obligingly repeated her questions to the mummies. They ignored him, and continued shuffling.

 

Come to think of it, Qube wasn’t actually sure that the mummies were accompanying them at all. They might have just been shuffling in their general direction. Before she could attempt to think of a different tactic, they reached the end of the desert and arrived at a line of high grass.

 

“Right,” the Chosen One said, stretching his arms over his head and limbering up. “I’m gonna fast travel back to Cobbletown.” He looked at Qube. “Let me know if anything weird happens. Well, weirder than normal.”

 

No one had ever gotten around to telling the Chosen One that Qube wasn’t the only one who didn’t sink into a deep meditation while the Chosen One did his “meditation to make the travel seem faster.” Qube hadn’t mentioned it because it’d slipped her mind to tell the Chosen One, and Sewer Bard and Definitely Bad Guy hadn’t said anything because…

 

Probably because of some reason related to their complicated feelings that Qube might not understand but was determined to respect.

 

The Chosen One set off, and the group ran in companionable silence. 

 

Normally, Qube would have used this opportunity to talk to the others in relative privacy, but instead she just admired the world sliding by. After the trials and tribulations of the Light Temple, where they’d managed to do practically the entire Temple without the Chosen One’s help, she was feeling a bit wrung out. Diving into a realm beyond her own and borrowing some of the Devs’ power to forcibly alter the pharaoh and erase the two destructive paths before him had also taken it out of her.

 

She still didn’t know why she hadn’t bled when the sacrificial blade had cut her. That was a tiny bit concerning. The pharaoh had seemed decidedly odd afterwards, and not really himself, which put a damper on any plans she might have made about using that same power against the Evil Emperor to pull him away from the path of Evil he was most likely on.

 

If she was being completely honest with herself, she also wasn’t sure if she would be able to resist the temptation to just erase the Evil Emperor himself, for what he’d done to her village.

 

Still! No point worrying about the future! Instead she watched some Fire Birds dance overhead. Almost literally. How were they staying aloft while doing such a complicated dance? Shouldn’t they be beating their wings? It was strange, the way they were moving almost reminded her of —

 

“The scorpion!” she gasped, suddenly remembering the giant scorpion that they had befriended, debated killing, taught to dance, and then used to get to the pharaoh’s tomb. She grabbed at Sexy Screamy Spider Lady, inadvertently pulling the Hunter out of her trance. “We forgot to collect the scorpion!”

 

The arachnid blinked all her eyes, looking around in confusion.

 

“What happened to the scorpion after it took us to the pharaoh’s tomb?” Qube asked, her eyes wide at the idea that they’d abandoned their new friend.

 

“There, there,” the giant spider said, patting Qube consolingly with a claw. “I’m sure the poor dear is just enjoying their newfound freedom. After all, they can dig wherever they want, can’t they now?”

 

“I hope we can find them again sometime and thank them for helping us,” Qube said, chewing on her bottom lip. 

 

“You know, I’ve never realised how peaceful it is just jogging along,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady said, her legs scuttling.

 

“There is a strange serenity to it,” Sewer Bard finally spoke up, smiling at her. “A serenity that is only enhanced by your presence.”

 

“You flatter me,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady said lightly. “You should continue to do so.”

 

Definitely Bad Guy, either through prudence or because he was genuinely meditating, said nothing as the Hunter and the Bard started to flirt with each other, and Qube regretted ever waking anyone up, at all.

 

High above them, too high to be heard, the Fire Birds danced through the air, and sang to each other a newly-taught song. 

 

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