Shame and Desire

Chapter 12: Chapter 12


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Smut. One of the best ways to start a chapter. And a staple of all good TG stories. Well, not quite all of them, but it did seem to be a common feature. It was a good way to get engagement, at least.

So it was actually a bit surprising that it took until the halfway point for “For a Girl” to have any full on erotic scenes.

Devin, having already read the story multiple times, was aware of this fact, yet it didn’t quite sink in how odd this would have been back when it was first posted until now. Back then, a lot of TG stories got into the erotic stuff pretty early, and not many of them held off on it.

It really shows how “For a Girl” tries to be more like a real published novel rather than a one-off fetish romp, Devin thought to himself.

As for the erotic scene itself, Devin could now see how oddly written it was. The main point of it was to show that the character, Arleen, was a lesbian, and that Stephanie was now attracted to men. And it accomplished that by having Stephanie go on a rant about opera for a few paragraphs to make a really forced analogy.

It also didn’t help that the scene started by having Arleen force Stephanie into an abandoned room and then lock the door. In real life, that would be terrifying.

***

“You want to know what I don’t get?” Elise said.

“What?” Devin asked.

“Stephanie’s boobs. What’s so special about them anyway? 34C isn’t that big. It’s pretty average actually. So what’s so great about them? Why is every other girl jealous of them? Do they have some kind of special titty magic or something?”

Devin laughed. “I don’t think you understand. She’s not just a girl. She’s the BEST girl. She’s supposed to be better looking than the rest of them. They’re supposed to be jealous of her. It’s how these stories work.”

“Well that’s stupid.”

“It probably is. You know, maybe you could write one of these.”

“Oh god no. I can’t write. When I was 12 I wrote a Star Wars fanfiction. It was REAL bad.”

“Did you finish it?”

“I did, actually. Something I’m still surprised by.”

***

As Devin thought about it more, it was a bit peculiar that it was such a common trope in TG stories to have the gender bent main character be especially attractive and beautiful. There was always some kind of explanation as to why the main character looked so good. Why they were just so much prettier than other women.

“Well I guess it’s really not that peculiar” he thought, “it actually makes a lot of sense”.

It wasn’t as if TG stories were the only kind of wish fulfillment material out there. There were all kinds of it. And a lot of it was aimed at women. How many fanfictions were there where the main female character was so stunningly beautiful? It would be impossible to count them all. So it only made sense that wish fulfillment aimed at trans women would work the same way.

***

The first track and field race as a girl. They had finally gotten to this point in the story. It was a pretty big moment, and a pretty well written one too. The whole transition of Stephanie coming to peace with her limitations was fast but still paced well. When she wins that first race, it’s a very satisfying moment.

“For a Girl” does occasionally get flack for being sexist, and maybe it is. But as Elise said, acknowledging sexism isn’t the same as supporting it, and at this point Devin was thinking that some people were being a little bad faith when calling the story sexist. If it is sexist, it’s not because of Stephanie’s character arc where she needs to learn being a woman isn’t a downgrade.

All things considered, Devin didn’t think “For a Girl” was very good from a feminist perspective, but it has that one character arc and runs with it. It was at least better than most Fictionmania stories at the time.

***

“Best friends to lovers…” Devin said as the sixth chapter concluded. “Never really cared for that trope. But when one of them is a woman and wasn’t a woman before? I love that stuff. Can never get enough of it.”

“I guess that does spice things up a bit.” Elise said. “Anyway, I should probably be heading home now. You know my parents, they wouldn’t like me staying at your house too late. I’d never hear the end of it.”

You are reading story Shame and Desire at novel35.com

Devin chuckled. “Yes, I am aware.”

Elise stood up from the chair she was sitting at and stretched herself. “Well, I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow?”

Devin sighed. “I have a shift tomorrow. Are you free in two days?”

“Yeah, I can do that.”

“You know, if you want to read that story, you can do it on your own. You don’t need to be here.”

Elise smiled. “Well then I wouldn’t be able to hear your commentary. I love hearing people talk passionately about stuff I don’t know anything about.”

“Is my commentary really that interesting? I thought it was boring.”

Elise shook her head. “It’s really not. It’s fun. Be proud of it.”

Devin huffed and nodded his head.

“Can I… ask you something?” Elise asked.

“What?”

“How did you get those pills?”

“You mean the pills for bodily changes?”

“Yeah, the pills for… bodily changes.”

Devin took a deep breath. “So”, he started, “there’s this person on twitter that kind of helped me get them.”

“Oh?” Elise responded. “Who?”

“I mean, I’m sure they’d rather be left anonymous.”

“Okay?”

Devin gave a slight nod. “Yeah, they help out a lot of people with this stuff. I think it’s good work and all. I don’t know what I’d do without those pills.”

“Well that’s great to hear.” Elise said.

“Yeah.”

After conversing for a few more minutes, Elise eventually walked out of the house and got to her car. Before she left, the two embraced in another hug.

“Good bye.” Devin said.

“Good bye, Sierra.” Elise said back.

Devin’s eyes immediately widened at her use of that name. He was left speechless as Elise kissed his cheek and waved good-bye at him. As she drove away, the hint of a smile started to spread across Sierra’s face.

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