Short Stories With Fangs

Chapter 12: Chapter 12: You lead, or else.


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Chapter 12: You lead, or else.

Well, I am just a regular guy, with regular dreams. I clearly remember that I listened to Hypno Dancer, before I died. Go hypno dancer, go hypno dancer! Best song ever!

Anyway, I died, and then when I opened my eyes, I was not before the pearly gates. Now, that might be because I worship my pet rock, might not be.

I mean, if I will be paying homage to something that won't ever answer back, it might be something with a smiley face, am I right?

Anyway, there is this really fancy sword next to me. I pick it up, and suddenly, it glows blue.

[Welcome! Hero of Ultimate Fate Joe, you are chosen to end the reign of Demon Lord Marius. Use the resources of the Island of the Forsaken to achieve these feet.]

I chuck the sword at a tree, and get up. Oh, great, I am in a survival show, and I might have overdone it with the Happy Mushrooms. No, they are not drugs.

They are just these really neat sweets, which are with egg white cream, and dipped in chocolate. They even have a waffle on the bottom. Mm, Happy Mushrooms.

The sword rises, and then zaps to me. I narrow my eyes. I chuck it to another tree. The sword comes back to me.

I huff, and just get up. Well, I don't know much about voices in one's head, but I don't want, nothing to do with no demon lord. I lug the sword with me to a coconut tree, and then proceed to bash the tree with the sword. A coconut falls next to me. Neat!

As I battle with the coconut, I hear something like splashing water. I look around, and see a man swimming towards me. He carries a bag. My eyes narrow.

"Hey, sword, is this the demon lord?" I ask the sword, and it glows red.

[Prepare for battle!]

As if. I pick up my coconut, which is still whole and unbroken, and leg it deeper into the island. Let him come to me where I can drop from a tree, ninja style!

No one comes for me, and I resume battering the coconut with the sword. Has this thing been sharpened before? It doesn't seem so.

[You lose 10 hero points because you ran from the demon lord. Loss of all hero points will result in a penalty.]

Hm, big deal. I already died. Maybe, I can see the pearly gates next time? Food for thought.

A few hours later…

The blasted coconut is still hole. At this point, I don't know what to do. So, I rise the sword over my own head, and then bring it down on the coconut with all my strength. It finally splits, and all the water from inside waters the ground. Shit. Well, at least the hard part should still be eatable.

A few hours later…

Water, I need water. I have been wandering around for hours. But no water is to be found. Not even a little mud puddle. I read once that elephants used their legs, to dig into the mud for water. I'd do the same, if only I could find the blasted mud puddle.

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Furthermore, I see footprints on the ground, and decide to follow them. Either I will find water, or will end up eaten. Now, I don't want to kid myself. If the blasted coconut took so many hits, then I don't see how this stupid sword will help me against a wild beast.

It would be neat, if I take down a boar, though…

A few hours later…

A spring! It is in something like a stone bath tub, so, I drink my fill. How great is this? I can stay in here, but maybe not sleep in here. I mean, animals must come to drink. What if I end up eaten?

I take a bath in the bathtub, after I am done drinking. With more than a little joy, I watch, as the dirty water slowly slips out of the bathtub. Now that I am clean, and watered, I need to find… another coconut.

It was so much easier when I used to play games. I wonder why I liked them if they were so unrealistic. And, great pet rock, why does it have to be so hot on this island?

A few days later…

I am sick and tired of coconuts. I think I lost three kilograms by now. The blasted sword has been vibrating for four days straight. I am sick and tired of this island.

If I am this… Hero of Ultimate Fate, don't I get magic powers? I must, right? It is only fair.

"Hey, sword, don't I get magical powers? Come on, throw me a bone?" I ask the red glowing sword.

[The special power of the Hero of Ultimate Fate Joe is the Wish Granter. It can be used twice per day.]

Hm, I think I got a plan. But for that, I need to go back to the beach. I just hope that the thing that tried to reach me before I legged it, will come back again. Time to bag myself a demon lord!

A few hours later…

"Hey, demon lord! Hey, buddy! I have a deal for you. Come on, come over here. I won't strike at you, I swear!" I yell at the water. Just as I am about to quit, the man comes as close to the shore, as his tail will allow.

I wave at him, and then move closer to him, but not within grabbing distance.

"You are not a woman," the man says, and I nod.

"No, but I can grant you any wish you want. Come on, just think about it, and I will grant it," I prepare the trap. He closes his eyes, and then I force my will upon his wish. Soon, he opens his eyes, but now, instead of a tail, he has legs.

"What in the world?" But I am not done. For, I have one more wish to manipulate. I force my wish over his, and then have his body change further. Now, the demon lord is a demon lady! All right, now I can stay on the island, no problem! Go hypno dancer!

The unholy union between the Heroes of Ultimate Fate and the Demon Lords is not something uncommon. Yet, what Joe didn't know was, that Marius was not going to take it lying down.

Yet, the merman… I guess it is mermaid now? The mermaid had plans for Joe. But before that, she had to manipulate him. And the rest, is a holy crusade against people, who were much like… Marianna. I mean, Marius. No, Marianna… Oh, I am so confused.

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