Chapter 341: 341. Kiss Me, Again And Again.

"Let go of my hand!" Katherine growled, yanking her arm away from Paul's grip. "Are you high?"

Frustrated Paul combed through his hair with violently moving fingers. Placing the other arm on his hip he turned around to face her, his recently tousled hair falling in tendrils down his forehead where the dark strands sat framing his eyes. Katherine rage only burned brighter as she reacted to him. They way he looked wasn't fair, clad in all black, ripped black jeans that hugged his strong thighs and a black button up shirt that hung on his lean frame two buttons too open exposing the white smooth skin beneath. Skin that was exposed more with every breath he took, when did he get so sweaty? Because she tried to understand how his skin shone. But she wasn't the only one stunned speechless by the other, she wasn't the only one noticing things, and whilst she was mad, enraged at both him and her wicked heart that had refused to let her have peace. Paul was beyond confused. 

He had begun to realise ever so slowly that Katherine was more than just Katherine, perhaps he knew it all along but refused to acknowledge it but not anymore. Not after that kiss, and by god it was just a kiss. A stupid kiss he could not get out of his head, a stupid kiss that made him stare at her like she was a fresh sparkling glass of water and he was a starved thirsty man in a desert. "What was I supposed to do? You have refused to see me."

Katherine looked away quickly, grateful for momentary distraction his reply provided her. "Well it's not like you were actively trying either." 

Paul nodded, she was right. He wasn't actively trying, he wanted to see her ofcourse he always wanted to see Katherine but he had been so confused with the way they left things the last time he stayed away. "I can't believe this is happening because of a simple kiss." He stated. 

Katherine eyes lowered dangerously and without knowing she fisted her palms and squared her shoulders, "simple kiss?" She remarked. 

"Well it... was, look I don't know what to say Katherine. It seems like everything I say or do is wrong, what do you want me to say. I hate the way things are between us, it's not supposed to be awkward." He explained, pushing back the locks of hair that framed his forehead only to have them bounce back.

"Why don't you say what you feel? I won't stop you, it's your feeling not mine." She spat, glaring at him with so much hostility he felt it right in his chest. 

"Don't do that, stop staring at me like that." He ordered, "I hate it, I hate you angry with me and you know that. Can't you see I'm ready to do whatever it is you want, just tell me. Gosh! I wish that damned kiss didn't happen, I'm sorry okay! I'm sorry I kissed you."

Katherine brown eyes were set ablaze and they burned with the hurt and pain and longing and desperation and hope stewing for twenty years. She wasn't going to continue like this, she would not continue like this! This had to end now, this pain stops here. And if it didn't then he must feel the exact way she did!

"Goddamn you Paul!" She screamed, "you're sorry you kissed me? That's you conclusion?! You big... big fat fool, how dumb can you be my goodness!" 

Paul eyes widened at her outburst and as she continued to spit out curses he stepped backwards utterly shocked at her outburst. 

"What do I have to do to make you realise that I don't want you to apologise for kissing me but I actually want you to want to do it again and again and again!" She exclaimed, tears pooling in her eyes at an alarming rate.

"What?" 

"I'm in love with you Paul, I've loved you for so long I can't remember a time I wasn't in love with you! But over and over, over and over you continue to rip into me, continue to hurt me. With your little remarks of how we are just friends, how you seem to be attracted to every other woman but me! How you continuously flirt with everyone but not Katherine right? Because we are just friends." She cried, shoving back her shoulder length brown hair she held on to a handful of the hair and turned away unwilling to let him see her cry.

Paul stood motionless, everything except his hammering heart stopped. His thoughts, his breathing, his ability to assimilate her words. But one thought remained, he loved her back. All this years he loved her but somehow he was only realizing it now, he loved Katherine. He loved her, what a fool he'd been! A fucking damned fool! 

'I actually want you to want to do it again and again and again!'

He couldn't stop himself, he didn't want to either. Long strides he grabbed her arm and spun her around, cupping her face and pulling her to him. He placed a blazing kiss on her lips and deepened it without mercy causing her to stagger backwards. 

To say Katherine was shocked would be an understatement but her body was lit like she was on fire and her blood boiled viciously, and as he let out a guttural moan whatever fight her brain tried to come up with dissolved into a puddle of goo. Grabbing fistfuls of his already loose shirt she shut her eyes and melted aganist him. Her heart was about to explode from emotions and her body from the intensity of his kiss. As his mouth began to move aganist her struggled to keep up with the ferocity of his kiss. 

The moment his tongue stroked her Katherine's legs gave out but his powerful hand around her waist caught her and held her to him, her body flush against his. Only thin pieces fabrics separating the two heated bodies, clawing for each other, clawing for passion. Paul left no stone unturned with this kiss, nibbling, biting, licking and sucking. He pleasured her mouth relentlessly his wandering hands causing her uncontrollably trembling. 

There was no apology for this kiss, he was right. She was water and he thirsted all his life for this woman, his foolishness and nothing else denied him from this feeling. This inexplicable bliss, and now he knew he would make up for all her pain all his life. He didn't care how or the cost he would sacrifice his life to protect this, this... he spent so long searching for this, too long.

But way too soon the kiss came to an end, she wasn't breathing he realized breaking away he kept her close to him still as they panted together.

"Breathe" he whispered to her, his warm breath fanning her face.

Katherine looked up at him, completely and totally in his arms, she was so sure she wasn't on her two feet with her own strength. But as her heart pounded painfully her subconscious cried out, that break would never be able to clear her muddled mind but she somehow managed, using the last individual strength she had she pushed him away.

"No! No" she shook her head vigorously, staggering backwards looking exactly as she should. Thoroughly kissed.

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"Katherine " Paul called out softly but with an outstretched arm and pointed fingers she warned him.

"No!" 

"No?" 

"No!" 

Katherine had the words she wanted to say right at the tip of her tongue but her foolish brain could only formulate the word 'no'. After another few seconds away from his blazing touch she cleared and throat and spoke. "You don't get to just walk into my life and kiss me like that!" She yelled. 

I actually want you to want to do it again and again and again!'

The confusion etched on his face could still not compare to what he felt inwardly. Did he somehow miss something?

"I have a boyfriend!" She added.

I'm in love with you Paul, I've loved you for so long I can't remember a time I wasn't in love with you!

Again he asked himself, did he miss something? He listened, like to everything she said what now was the problem?

"You've hurt me too much, I would be doing myself a great disadvantage to just let you kiss me and act like it's fine. You don't get to eat your cake and have it." She continued. 

"So what do you mean? You love me but don't want to be with me?" 

Katherine snapped her fingers, "correct. For the first time you realise something without me having to explain it to you." She spat. 

"That is not fair" Paul replied. 

Katherine scoffed, "what is not fair is being hopelessly and helplessly in love with you for twenty years, just to be shoved into the friend zone."

"I didn't know!" 

"Well it's too bad now isn't it. Sure I'm in love with you but I'm learning not to be like that, I'm trying with all I have to get over you and be happy." She retorted.

Paul jaw dropped, "then why tell me if you're trying to walk away." 

A sly smile appeared on her lips, "because I shouldn't suffer alone. Now that wouldn't be fair. If you don't mind I was going out with my boyfriend before you dragged me here, I'll leave first." She stated turning around to walk away.

"And you think I'm just going to let you walk away?" He said, causing her to halt. "I'll admit I was a fool, I mean not to realise that I had always loved you until you had to say it." 

Katherine turned around with surprised eyes. "You're lying, you're saying anything to keep me here."

"No, it's true but I don't expect you to believe me, I don't even desire it. I must have put you through hell and I am willing suffer through anything to get you to forgive me, but I will never let you walk away. Because finding out you love me is the greatest asset I can ever have in my life." He said, his words soft but the sincerity of his eyes hitting her in ways she couldn't resist.

Blinking back tears she turned around, "I won't forgive you just like that. Because you think you love me." 

"Don't, and I do love you." Katherine heart cried all over again, with shaky legs she forced herself to walk out of the room.

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