Chapter 117: I Will Wait

He trailed his hands down to her lips and grazed them with his thumb. "You are the only woman I have ever fallen for and loved in my life, to the point I find myself unable to stop or let go." He leaned down and smelled her scent with his eyes shut.
Alesea's body shuddered, and she closed her eyes, inhaling his scent. "If all you said is true, then why are you pushing me away? Why say all this to me now, after I have accepted your rejection?" 
Alex's eyes fluttered, and he raised his head to gaze deeply into her eyes. He caressed her cheek and an unknown glint she couldn't quite catch flickered in his gray eyes. "Alesea... I love you very much, but... I am finding it hard to be with yo-"
"Fuck you!" She yelled at him, and her eyes twitched in anger. "You're so selfish!! All you care about is yourself! Your feelings! Only you! " She screamed as her hand poked at his chest in a rage. "You don't care about me one bit! You don't even love me! All you are trying to do is to hurt me for reasons I don't know. "
"What do you think I am? I know that I am madly in love with you, but it's not to the point where I'll let you hurt me whenever you want, however you want and when you please to do so!! You have been rejecting me and finally, today, when I got the courage to accept your rejection, you want to break me completely!! Ahh, I wish you were never my mate in the first place!!! Maybe I won't be hurting this way. " She yelled, and painful tears ran down her cheek.
"Stay away from me and leave me alone! You're free, now let me free myself too!" She pushed him out of the way and walked past him in an attempt to return home. However, Alex's arm abruptly grabbed her by the waist and slammed her back against the tree.
"Why can't you understand?" He yelled in pain and anger, and lines of veins emerged on his neck. "I am selfish!?! Did you think that if I didn't love you and wanted you to stay, I would have succumbed to your kiss that day? Do you think that you would be standing here in front of me, hearing 'I love you,' from me if I didn't love you? "
"I am trying to fight myself, to fully accept you and make up my mind, but it is hard for me!!! Your family killed my parents, and it turned out that their niece was my mate. How do you think I feel? "
"Do you think I don't feel guilty about being in love with a relative of my parent's murderer? That I want to be with her so much that I find myself giving in? You don't understand because you're not in my shoes!! " His wet lashes fluttered and he stepped away from her.

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"I'm unable to let you go because I'm madly in love with you, just like you are with me, but at the same time, my mind is judging me, telling me how bad of a son I am to my parents. I mean, who would fall in love with the relative of their parent's murderer? It's only me!" He chuckled pessimistically and turned around, leaving his back to face her.
He shoved his hands into his pocket and took a deep breath.
"I don't blame you either, because I am a total jerk. I don't deserve you because you're worth a lot. You deserve a better man, so I guess it's okay to let go. As much as I don't want to let you go, I surmise I have to because I will only cause you pain. I am sorry, Alesea. I do love you just like I said, and I will never stop, even after letting you go. " A deep sigh left his mouth and he took two steps, about to disappear. However, slender arms unexpectedly wrapped around him, halting him on his track. A body pushed against his back, and his heart trembled within him.
"I want to be with you, Alex. I... love you so much that I can't let go, even though I pretend to be able to." Alesea sniffed and cried uncontrollably, her snorts tainting his clothing.
Alex grabbed her wrist and unwrapped her arms around his waist, then turned around to stare at her face. "I am so-" She proceeded to apologize to him, but Alex unexpectedly covered her lips with his. He cupped her cheek with his hand and kissed her so gently. "I love you, Alesea..." he whispered against her lips and gently stroked her face.
"Please don't leave me. Give me time, let me talk to myself. Let me figure myself out and gather my spirit together. I love you and want to be with you. That's a fact I can't and will never deny. So...I plead with you to give me a bit of time. Just to- "
"Okay, I will wait for you. It won't hurt much because I can still wait just like I waited those years to hear this word from you again. " She leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his lips before pulling back and gazing at his face. "I will wait for you, Alex." She said and proceeded to leave. However, Alex grabbed her wrist, stopping her from leaving.
She turned her head to look at him, and a pleading gaze emerged on Alex's face. "Come and visit me sometimes. I would love it if you did." He half-smiled at her, and Alesea nodded at him. Then, with a beautiful smile on her face, she turned around and disappeared.
A deep sigh left Alex's mouth, and he raised his eyes to gaze up at the dark sky.. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants and began to walk away as the cold wind blew on his top.

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