Chapter 75: 76. Chapter

-From the perspective of Barriss-

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After I brought the wine for Master we left the mansion in haste. We got back to the temple and now I was ordered to wait here with this weirdo, and wow she was not normal by any means. She was making me self aware, in a bad way to be honest. 

People especially children, were always saying that jedi were weird, even on missions, where me and master were sent to help out villages with a lot of kids. They called me weird behind my back, they didn't know, or didn't care that I could hear them. I would never admit it to master, but those words made me feel uncomfortable, they hurt me, especially after we helped them out. 

I never wanted to believe, that I was weird in any way. I don't want to believe it even now, but it is something I can't get rid of. If a jedi appears in any place beside the temple, our very presence will cause the people to radically change their behaviors. 

Some do so, from respect, some have ulterior motives, while others do it out of fear. At first, you may even enjoy this type of attention, but soon enough, this will become a heavy burden. Especially when you grow big enough, to realize, that the world basically acts around you as an anchor. 

Every people is wary of your presence, therefore they will try to act naturally around you, while putting on their best expression, with a harmless demeanor. You are the only one, who is not affected by this change, because you are the cause of it, and because of that, you are excluded from the rest of the world. 

Everybody, will look at you, with a strong expectation. In this galaxy even beyond the outer rim, you will not find a single grown man who doesn't have a strong belief about what a jedi is. More often than, not, those beliefs are completely ridiculous, even in the better cases they tend to be half truths. 

However, now that I look at this girl, Lily... Among the hundreds of alien races I saw and met, she is definitely among the top ten strangest ones. Its not, because she looks that different, she is very human in look to be honest. No, it's maybe her demeanor, or the lack of it? No-no... the way she moves, and stands there... yeah, that part of it. She stands there reminding me of a praying mantis, completely unmoving, yet ready to jump in any second. 

There is something, wild, primordial around her, and she is always in that state. Those she even know what relaxing means? Is this her standard mental state, always ready to jump into action at the first opportunity? 

If that is so, for some reason I feel bad for her. 

I sighed, and shook my head weakly. I guess, something like this, wouldn't be so obvious to normal people, as a jedi padawan, I am prone to sense such emotions more easily than other people. She was weird, and I felt weird for being the one to say something like that... I guess, in the end from the perspective of normal children... I was weird too. It is probably time to stop deluding myself with such futile thoughts. 

Curse it... even if I accepted to be a weirdo. This waiting was killing me... I expected a fight, or at least something that resembled a fight, but the new girl decided to just give up any opposition all of a sudden, and the others had already left before I would be able to get my share of excitement. 

It was a completely wasted opportunity. 

I was currently eyeing the girl, she was beyond strange even compared to me, and I had never seen this type of intelligent alien lifeforms before. How could she stand in complete stillness and silence. Is this some sort of standing meditation? 

Damn the council, old fools always taking their sweet time... just call us inside already! Master is probably telling them what happened until now, and how we captured this girl. Come to think of it, it was me who captured her, I should get some awards... at least a free weekend. 

At least her name was truly Lily, as she had an identification card used by official bounty hunters in the hutt sectors. The sign of Jabba the Hutt was visible on the card, meaning that the underground lord had decided to personally back her activities. It was usually a great sign of respect reserved to those who have gained the hutt lord's favor.

This was a great blessing in the hutt sectors, as not many would begin an argument with someone, who is favored by one of the sin lords. However, in the sectors controlled by the republic. Such a sign, was the equivalent of being wanted. As who else would be favored by sin lords, than a sinful being?

Even so this girl doesn't seem to be that aggressive. She was very obedient in fact, to the point that it made me feel really awkward. I told her to wait here in silence until the council calls for us. She only nodded once and hadn't even moved a single muscle since than. I was supposed to be her guard, I hoped she would try to run away or something and then I could teach her a lesson, but she was apparently not in the mood. 

What was the reason to guard her in the first place? She was like a statue, wait... did she fall asleep perhaps? There are certain animals and creatures that could sleep while standing, however her eyes are open, so that isn't likely I guess. Come to think of it, she didn't even blink a single time in the last ten minutes... Is she still alive? Did she die while standing, I will be in so much trouble if she dies while in front of the council... 

With that thought, I decided to ask.

-Are you, alright? 

I couldn't hide my uncertainty coloring my voice.

I heard a crackling sound, as her face forcefully turned in my direction, it was the sound of carapace grazing over carapace. The back of her neck was covered in thick armor, I could see, as her strange hair was pulled into a thick ponytail exposing her neck slightly.

The sound combined with the eery movement made my skin crawl. It was similar to the sound of a breaking bone, as if her neck was broken in the quick movement. 

-I am fine. 

Stated the girl, and turned her head to look forward in a similarly eery way.

I gulped lightly trying to hide my discomfort.

Okay... she was fine, I did my duty after all! I hope master finishes soon... 

I straightened my back, and looked at the door, hoping that it would open, but it didn't. Time passed by and I soon found my eyes wandering back to the form of Lily. 

The scanners went over her, at the door, and there was no weapon on her body... Aside from her natural ones. She promised, that she wouldn't do anything, and to be honest... even if she wanted, as she is right now, she couldn't hurt us.

There were four temple guards standing in every corner of this corridor... and I was here too... She couldn't even raise a finger, and would be force pushed into a wall or something. 

Yeah, those guys would do it without a second thought... temple guards were not your average jedi. They are first and foremost prioritizing the defense of the temple especially in a state of war. The temple's secrets are their first priority then those who live here, young-lings and padawans in this order. 

Some of them are really scary. They are literally ordered to kill anyone who sneaks into the temple illegally and shows signs of resistance in a way that may endanger the life of other jedi or the temple's secrets. 

I turned my head towards the temple guards... their faces were covered with a mask, and body armor. I looked over them slowly... and realized something... Shoot, all of them were staring at the new girl while holding their weapons. I guess that was the reason, why she was so tense. I don't get it, they shouldn't be this cautious, is this because of her eye color? She had these blazing gold eyes, they might think of her as a sith. 

How foolish, she couldn't be a sith... no sith would give herself into the hands of the jedi so easily, and she wasn't even that strong. Master Kenobi said, that the sith he fought, was immensely powerful, a master of lightsaber combat. 

Lily didn't even have a lightsaber, and only used a simple force push, even if it was quite strong. I felt embarrassed as I thought of the leafs stuck in my hair. I was trying to get rid of them the entire way back to the temple... Anyway, she surprised me, that was the only reason why I was blown away like that... It doesn't count.

I rolled my eyes as I thought of that memory.

Of course master couldn't help but comment on me with a smirk saying: "Vanity leads to the dark side Barriss." Naturally I smirked back, and said, "Indulging one 'self chasing vain pleasure also leads to it."

She snorted, hearing my comment, but didn't say anything else, so I got to enjoy my small victory.

I began to fidget, and decided to attempt communication one more time with the awkward girl. I turned towards her and asked while looking at the missing piece of her feeler. 

-Are you sure, that you are alright? I mean, it is not exactly a common response after one of your limbs were recently cut off. We could give you first aid or something like that... We have incredible healers in the temple, you know...

My voice turned silent, as I saw her head snap towards the missing part while creating that horrendous sound. She stared at the maimed chunk, then blinked, for the first time today possibly. After that, I couldn't help but gasp in a mix of awe and shock. Her feeler grew back in a matter of seconds, it just elongated and parted where it needed to part to take up its original form.

Making a series of crackling and popping sounds as the bones and carapace melded into the necessary form.

I felt goosebumps running all over my body, and stepped back a few times hearing those sounds... it was reminding me of the noises in famous holo-horrors. 

-I am fine. I am quite hard to kill, you don't have to concern yourself over such minor injuries.

-... Good gracious! I can see that, how did you even do that... isn't that, I don't know painful? 

-Pain is natural. I don't like it, but I accept it. With time, I understood that pain itself is irrelevant, efficiency is what matters. If I can heal quickly, even in the midst of a battle, then I should thrive to do so. Without this ability. I would be dead now.

-...Wow... that's one way to look at it I guess... but why don't you try to, I don't know... Avoid pain more effectively in the first place? 

-If you don't fight, you will perish, running away, not possible. Fighting is necessary to gain new information, to evolve.

-Wh-what do you mean by that? 

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She blinked once more, then stated in her strange emotionless tone. 

-I tried to run away, but it never worked. Now I fight, to evolve, to gain freedom. 

-Aren't you free already? I mean... you, before we captured you... You seemed pretty free to me?

-... I don't... I wasn't, free. 

-Why?

-Because, I was not powerful enough, to stop others from taking away my freedom.

-What?! Weeell, sorry! I guess? However, I don't believe that I was the one forcing you to commit a crime... Now it is time to repent, for that crime. It is how it is! And anyway... If you think like that, then almost nobody is free in this whole universe! 

-That is right, and I have realized, that I was wrong. I will accept my punishment.

-Ehhh!? Just like that... how mature of you... You, know... cough, you look quite scary, but you are funny and pretty honest at least. 

She blinked trying to process my words. While I looked away in embarrassment.

-I don't understand, I wasn't trying to make a joke. 

-I know, I know! It's because you are so serious, that I find it kind of funny... Does that make any sense to you?

-No.

I snorted, trying to stop my bubbling laughter. I didn't want to confuse her even more. This girl was very innocent from certain perspectives, while in others she stated things with shocking depths all that in absolute confidence. Surprisingly, there wasn't even a trace of arrogance in her, when she didn't understand something, she didn't pretend to know it, instead asked it straightforwardly. She didn't mind it, if the question made her look like a complete fool. 

She was leaning her head to the side while trying to comprehend my reaction. 

-You know... it is unlikely for you to be able to fight the world alone. Why don't you depend on someone, friends for example... family? 

That made her think, but still gave me a relatively quick answer. 

-You are right... the zerg's strength was always in their numbers. I am afraid, that my family might be turned against me once more... My own weakness, is the weakness of the swarm. I don't want my own incompetence to cause such suffering, I need to become stronger before I attempt such a thing. 

-Oh, well, come to think of it, you said you had children... but then you called children those bugs too... Was that what you meant? 

-Yes, isn't that what children are? 

-Ah... no? 

-Then what is it, how does it work?

-Ah-eh-a-a-a-a... I mean.... I-uhmm... 

I felt the skin on my face turn a deep green color from the level of embarrassment. Is she seriously asking me about that sort of thing... in the middle of the jedi temple, in front of four temple guards... Come to think of it, the aura was pretty harsh in the corridor, after she grew back her appendage...

However now, that I looked around in panic, trying to get some help from the adults... I realized that the atmosphere lightened considerably. It was almost warm. I heard a snort and turned towards the origin of the noise. 

My expression turned ugly, as I saw one of the temple guards look to the side, clearly struggling to hold back his laughter while watching my situation.

I turned back to her seeing that the intensity of her eyes didn't falter at all. 

I swallowed drily... and gathered myself. I am a responsible padawan, in a few more years, I will be an adult... something like this shouldn't be a problem.

-You, know... it's... I mean when you start bleeding... and because of that... 

-What do you mean by bleeding? 

-You know... once per month... 

-I only bleed if I am cut, or injured. It happens much more often than once per month.

-You!... Sigh. You know what I mean, stop pulling my leg!

I stomped with my leg, losing control momentarily as a new wave of embarrassment flushed my cheeks.

-I didn't pull your leg, you stomped with it. 

I rolled my eyes. 

-That's not what I meant! ARGH! You are doing this intentionally, right!? 

I heard another snort from a different corner this time, and I knew that I had enough.

-You know what? I actually don't know. Sorry... 

-Oh... 

Now she looked sad. I couldn't let that happen right? An evil smirk appeared on my face, hearing the third snort in the background.

-However... you can ask one of the men standing in those corners... I am sure they might know something about this matter.

-Really? 

I felt chills as four pairs of death stares were suddenly pointed at my scalp. You were the ones, who started, so deal with it! 

-Oh, yes! I am sure of it!

-Then I will ask them. 

-Go on, Lily... I will watch from here... 

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

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