They rest for a while before Marcus gets to his feet and starts urging them up because the faster they find civilisation, the faster they can eat. That finally gets everyone moving.
"May," Vincenzo calls out and holds up his hands, still sitting on the ground.
May moves around in front of him and grabs on, pulling back to help get him to his feet.
"Try harder," Vincenzo demands, not moving from the ground.
May plants her feet and hauls back with all of her strength. Vincenzo lifts slightly but his feet slip forward instead and his butt lands on the ground again.
"Put your back into it," Ian encourages. "You almost got it that time."
"Nope," May states. "I give up." She tries to shake Vincenzo off but he clings and then just drags her down on top of him.
"Dad!" Kisung whines. "Vinny is bullying May."
Marcus crosses his arms. "Children, I will turn this kidnapping around if you don't behave yourselves."
"You're not my real dad!" Vincenzo screams.
May sighs, flopped over Vincenzo's shoulder. "Can you take this seriously? For once? Because it sounds like you're having fun, being teleported to who knows where."
"Of course we're taking this seriously," Marcus says soothingly, voice condescending as always. "Right now, we're even going to climb up and get a better look at the area."
Ian nods. "If I wasn't taking this seriously then I would have licked a mushroom already."
"Too late," Kisung admits and then shrugs when they turn to him. "What? I like mushrooms and it looked vaguely edible."
"Kisung is clearly dying first," Vincenzo states.
"Speaking of Kisung," Ian begins, backing away. "I need to pee again."
"Go fuck yourself," Kisung complains.
"Soon as I get back, doll," Ian promises and darts away.
Vincenzo smoothly rocks to his feet, May still over a shoulder, and follows Marcus and Kisung over to the mushroom with the most adequately spaced out branches up its length, each one with a slightly rounded cap only a bit larger than the branch in various hues of blue or purple. The trunks are white and one part just above their heads is torn, seeping cloudy grey sap.
"Dude, that's jizz," Kisung states. "I'm not climbing that giant chode."
Vincenzo scoffs. "That's a stretch. Does your chode look like that?"
"I can neither confirm nor deny."
"It's fine," Marcus says simply. "You can't climb anyway, you're too fat. I'm certainly not going first because I'm the brains of this operation and if I die then you're all doomed. May can't, she's wearing a skirt."
"So what?" Vincenzo argues. "There's nothing I'd want to see up there anyway."
"I'm happy with that," May deadpans into Vincenzo's back, still over his shoulder. "Can I get down now?"
Ian jogs up then. "So what are we – is that jizz?"
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"Ian, get up the giant chode," Vincenzo demands.
"That's quite the proposition there, love," Ian replies. "And I know I'm gonna regret this later but yeah nah."
Ian and Vincenzo end up climbing the mushroom anyway. The texture of it is rough with lots of ridges and bumps and so they don't slip much despite the rain making everything wet. They're both very athletic so they quickly scale the mushroom and disappear behind the caps.
The three remaining on the ground back up so they can see better, but the branches and caps become a lot thicker the higher the boys go and they still end up being obscured.
"What do you see?!" Marcus calls up, hands cupped around his mouth so the shout hopefully goes further.
"…uck…noth…."
"Pretty sure he said 'fucking nothing'," Kisung muses. "And hey, weren't you going on about people missing important points?"
"I'll go up there next," Marcus says dismissively. "I just wanted to see if the way was clear."
When the two start climbing down again, Marcus begins the trek upwards. They meet in the middle, there's a lot of swear words, and they part ways again. Ian goes back up with Marcus because some of the jumps require two people to reach the next cap up.
At the top, the largest caps are easily thirty meters wide and stable enough that you can run along them. The second group they saw are maybe another hour or so out, taking their sweet time. The grasslands stretch out between the mountains and the forest like a wide river, cut off eventually by the other habitats joining up at the ends.
The forest they're in is large but there are yawning gaps in the mushrooms. This could be something like a river or maybe a natural pause in the land. Marcus thinks it could be people in a small camp. Clearly there's a semi-regular stream of people arriving here so setting up a pitstop is logical.
"Let's go then," Vincenzo says, turning in the direction of a 'camp'.
Kisung frowns. "Shouldn't we wait for the other guys?" he asks, mostly thinking about how he really doesn't want to start walking again.
"We should," Marcus accepts. "Send that group in first, run if things turn bad."
Ian clicks his tongue in reprimand. "Don't jinx it."
"Prepare for the worst," Marcus retorts. "That way you can't be disappointed when things inevitably suck balls."
Kisung shrugs lazily. "I don't know about you, but I enjoy a little ball-sucking every now and then."
May starts walking away first because once the boys get started mocking each other they won't stop.
They slowly follow, still arguing about the benefits of having their balls sucked compared to sucking someone else's balls. Vincenzo keeps saying the words 'moist' and 'sweaty' while Ian goes into great detail about his own pair and Kisung describes the taste in the most disgusting way possible.
Marcus is the only tolerable one, helping May find a place near the tree they climbed in case they need to get to a higher vantage point, but also somewhere out of the wind so the coldness from their wet clothes isn't made even worse.
They find a little hollow made by a concaved mushroom tree trunk not too far away.
"Shut up," Kisung says suddenly. "Is that the-"
A familiar, low screeching builds rapidly.
Marcus drops to the ground so the noise doesn't throw him back instead, May huddles up in the tree hollow with hands over her ears, Ian lifts both his middle fingers in the vague direction of the grass field and Kisung just sighs in annoyance.
"Fuck you!" Vincenzo screams back as the blastwave hits.
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