Chapter 5: Chapter 5

I absolutely hated the wetlands.

It wasn’t the bugs, the mud, or the smell, it was having to constantly see my reflection in every pool of water. Sure I still wore my mask, but the image of my face kept appearing in my mind. The birthmark. The scars. Every time someone saw me without my mask. Every time I saw myself without a mask. This is what people would see. It made me wonder how people with facial deformities and the like lived every day. 

There wasn’t anyone around as far as I could see, but I still felt extremely self conscious about it. I didn’t even want to think about having to walk around in a crowded city where dozens, if not hundreds of people could see and stare at me.

I guess I’d have to learn to live with it? If not I’d end up holding myself up in my room again…

Man I had been a coward, hadn’t I? I had no reason to hold myself up in my room other than sheer laziness and fear of human interaction while there were those that had every right to not want to be seen because of some deformity or other and still chose to live their lives without caring what others thought of them.

But could I do that? Should I?

I didn’t want to go back to being a shut-in that did the bare minimum to stay alive, but the thought of everyone staring at me… well… It terrified me. Maybe if I had been born this way I would just deal with it because that was alway how I was, but I hadn’t. I had been mostly normal before, so I knew what it was like to be the one to stare at someone with a face like mine. I’d even been one of those that pointed and laughed in disgust.

It shamed me to know that I still felt that way. Disgusted at my own appearance. Ashamed to be seen with the form forced on me. It actually almost made me want to go back to Ignatio. At least there, there had been promises to fix my face. 

No, I could still do that without him. Perhaps I could find someone once I reached civilized lands that could do it in place of Ignatio? Yeah, if he could do it, there were probably others that could do it too. Of course I would need money. Probably.

Hello?

I stopped walking and looked around. Had someone just said something? It was still wetland as far as I could see and a quick use of my magic vision only showed the life force of some animals.

I paused.

For a moment I thought I saw the vague outline of a person, but it vanished as I tried to focus on it. 

I looked around for another minute before guessing it had been the wind or my imagination. I had been alone out here for a week already so maybe the solitude was beginning to play tricks on my mind?

I returned my thoughts to my plans on fixing myself, when one of my master’s lessons about Soul Gems came up, “Tell me, Tamana, what do you know about the soul?” He hadn’t waited for me to reply, “They form our very core and are where our true self lies. A body without a soul is a shell, unable to think or move. Even if the body still lives it will wither and die, for once combined, the two are connected by a nearly unbreakable bond.”

I had thought about it a lot, and it made sense, kinda. I’d heard scientists still weren’t sure where consciousness came from. If consciousness came from one’s soul, something we couldn’t see or touch, it would make sense why scientists hadn’t found out about it yet. The last part also made me wonder if people who were in comas didn’t have souls and they would wake up if it returned to their body. 

I returned my thoughts to what he said next, “The soul will mold itself to match the body, while the body depends on the soul to command it, and once the bond is made, changes to either will negatively impact the other. If one changes their body, it damages the soul. If one changes the soul, the body will not respond properly.”

So changing the body or soul was the same as putting the wrong part in a machine? Even if it still worked it wouldn’t work as good?

He had paused for a moment before continuing, “Normally, when a Golem is made, a new body is formed in the likeness of the soul. This means most Golems one sees will have the same likeness as they did before their death.” My master’s face had grown dark, “Tell me, what is the most fundamental aspect of one’s soul?”

He actually allowed me to answer, which threw me off guard, “Um… your consciousness?”

He shook his head, “Your Intelligence is the most precious thing, but it is an even more basic element than the soul, but is separate.” He pointed to my privates, “The most basic part of your soul is your sex. From this, everything else comes. From your appearance, to influencing your behavior and interests. Before you are born and receive your body, your soul has no distinct form, but has a unique energy aligned to either male or female that cannot be changed without destroying one’s soul. If a male spirit was placed inside a female body, the energies would conflict with each other, causing one to feel out of place and often causing them to seek to change themselves to the correct order.”

I wondered if this explained why some people didn’t stick to “normal” behavior when it came to sex and gender roles. Maybe those people that said they “were stuck in the wrong body” were right? Maybe their souls had accidentally gone into a body with the wrong sex when they were born?

He looked at me, a hint of pain in his eyes, “I saw my granddaughter's soul enter her body while she was still in her mother’s womb. Seeing a soul gain their body is one of the greatest gifts that being able to use magic has given us. Knowing that new life is preparing to bring itself into the world.”

I recalled wanting to ask him about how far into pregnancy a soul enters the body, but he asked me another question before I could, “What do you know about the levels of Soul Gems?”

I had thought for a moment before replying, “How str…”

He cut me off, “Yes, that is one aspect, but there is much more to it than gaining strength.” He paused, and it looked like he didn’t want to talk about what he was going to say next, “Ignatio’s dark ritual destroys your soul, only leaving your Intelligence.”

The memory of being stripped down to nothing but my thoughts returned to me both then and now, and I shivered.

He continued, “By giving you a new body you would be reborn as a human. If he brought more humans, they could gain power that rivaled his and overthrow him. Ignatio does not want this so he has to remake your souls.” His face grew dark, “But without your soul, there is no template for the creation of a new body. By sacrificing the life energies of other living beings, he can do something that should only be left to the Divine. The creation of new souls.”

And that explained why Ignatio needed so many sacrifices. This also meant by accepting the call, I had indirectly killed several people…

His face contorted in anger, but somehow there was a sense of pride too, “The new soul takes the form and sex of the strongest soul among the sacrifices. When this happens the soul takes on the most basic, most essential part of their essence and permanently retains it.” He looked at me, “As your form took that of my granddaughter's, your soul will forever be that of the feminine unless you undergo the dark ritual again.”

There was no way I would murder more people just to become a man again. I promised myself that then and renewed that promise again now.

He relaxed a little, “At the first stage of your Soul Gem, your sex is made permanent to your soul. At the second,” he looked at my ears and tail, “your basic form such as your race becomes permanent. Third, your height and build. The fourth, your defining features.” He glanced at my face before continuing, “Fifth, your body's fine details, such as moles and scars. Sixth, you regain life and all that comes with it. Pain, pleasure, and the ability to create new life.”

I guess that each level refined my Soul Gem closer to my body and it would be harder to make changes to my body the higher my Soul Gem level went. It also explained why they were waiting to level it up too. I guess I really was ugly enough that they wanted to wait until they could do something about my face before making it impossible to fix.

I turned my mind back to the present and looked at the crude sack I’d made to hold the stolen sacks of Soul Dust. I could level myself up to level three right now, but I’d be locking myself in at my height and build. I kinda wanted to make myself slightly shorter and more curvy… No… I should focus on fixing my face before worrying about vanity stuff like that. I guess this meant I had until level four until it wasn’t safe for me to change my face.

I decided that before I changed…

Hello?

I paused and looked around again, but didn’t see anyone around me. It could have been someone using an invisibility spell, so I turned on my magic vision. If it was just a basic invisibility spell I might be able to spot them even with my still novice level of the ability, but if it was more advanced there wouldn’t be anything I could do.

I saw a human shaped shadow not far to my left that disappeared just as I turned to it. I squinted and tried to focus my vision, but nothing came into view.

I decided to continue walking again, but kept up my Magic Sight. It didn’t take too much of my magic ability so I could keep it up for a minute or two, but that was only if I didn’t have to use Water Walk to cross a large section of water.

Nothing happened again for a while so I decided to conserve my magic power and move on, although now I found myself constantly looking over my shoulder.

I realized something as I continued. Could I be in the haunted part of the wetlands? I guess ghosts existing made sense since souls were a thing. This meant that the voice I’d heard and the shape I’d seen could well be this ghost.

I tried remembering if my master had said anything specific about what haunted this place, but he hadn’t said anything other than it preyed on people and lured them to their deaths. Of course, these were probably rumors and legends and it was probably just swamp gas attracting idiot explorers that then got sucked into the bog or whatever.

Still, there was a ghost and so far it had only said ‘hello,’ but…

Kindly help me, said a faint feminine voice.

I immediately activated my Magic Sight again, but once again couldn’t see anything other than a glimpse. All I saw was that she was getting closer.

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The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. The ghost was following me and gradually getting closer. My master hadn’t said anything about ghosts or what they could do so I wasn’t sure what kind of danger I was in. This was a world of magic, so it depended on how much and what kind they could use, and if the rumors were true… 

I picked up my pace. I wasn’t sure how far the ghost would follow me so I wanted to get out of her territory as fast as possible.

Wait! Kindly help me! The feminine voice sounded desperate.

I imagined this was how she lured men to their deaths. I mean, what kind of loser ignores a woman’s cries for help? At least it wasn’t a baby crying in the middle of nowhere. That… 

I shivered at the thought of a baby cry out here. I’d take this woman’s ghost over a ghost baby any day.

Kindly! I behight I won’t dere you! 

I glanced to my left to where the voice had come from, “Nope!” I didn’t know what ‘behight’ or ‘dere’ meant, but I didn’t care.

Kindly! I only want to forlet this plash! I know you can help! You’re sunderly from the others!

I wondered how long she’d been trapped here. If it was on purpose, it was probably for a reason, good or bad. If she had died here and was trapped… I would have to find out if she was lying. Maybe I could talk to her? 

Nah.

I kept going, but the voice kept getting closer, I can help you. 

Nope, not gonna trust a ghost.

But one minute! Let me talk to you for but one minute!

I could feel my magic power running out so I needed to be careful. Soul Dust wouldn’t dissolve in water, but it could still float away. If my magic ran out while I was moving over water I’d run the risk of losing some.

I instinctively put my hand on the little bags tied to my waist. Maybe I should have leveled my Soul Gem up already instead of just hanging onto them? The increased magic power would be very nice.

So that is where you are holding it.

One of the bags flashed briefly before the Soul Dust began swirling out and into the air around me, but instead of my Soul Gem leveling it up, I saw a shape form next to me, it’s hand on mine. I also began to feel something tugging on my very being, but it stopped after a moment.

Next to me stood the ghostly apparition of a woman. Her visage was completely white, as if she were made of light. She was shorter than me by a head and a half, with a curvy body that made me a little jealous. Her eyes were big and her face looked somewhat Middle-Eastern mixed with a little European. 

Her face was one of joy as her eyes met mine, “I am sorrowful at my way of inbringing, but you would not lin. If it were not for you, I would still be trapped in this plash. I thank you and behote to foryield my shild to you.”

It took me a moment to process what she was saying. It sounded like she was speaking the non vulgar dialect of the language spoken in this world that my master had drilled into my head. He hadn’t taught me much of it because apparently it was still understandable when compared to the vulgar, but even then, only a few sects of humans spoke it so it wasn’t important.

Well, it didn’t take me long to prove my master wrong. This ghost must have been someone important and/or powerful if she was speaking it. Or she’d been here for a really long time. Perhaps both.

I closed my eyes and breathed out deeply before looking at her again, “I… uh… you’re not going to kill me?”

The woman laughed, “I am now mere to you and not this plash. I will go whither you go until my shild is foryielded to you.”

Great. This ghost had used my Soul Dust to bind herself to me and insisted on… repaying her debt to me? 

Honestly, this was pretty cool. If she legit felt obligated to help me and wasn’t going to backstab me, she’d be a huge help. She could scout for me. Scare people with her ghostly visage. Or use some cool ghost powers. Sure there was a chance at backstabbery, but I had no idea how to unbind her from me so I might as well go along with it.

I shrugged, “Okay! Um… I guess introductions?” I wondered if I should tell her my old name, but decided to go with what my master called me, “I’m Tamana. What’s your name?”

She considered my words, then shook her head in understanding, “I am yclept Mula.”

I was temped to shake her hand, but doubted it would work with a ghost, “Uh… nice to meet you, Yclept Mula.”

She looked confused for a moment, then laughed in a polite manner, “Not Yclept Mula. Only Mula.”

I immediately felt embarrassed. I guess ‘yclept’ meant something and wasn’t part of her name. If I was going to be with her for a while, we really needed to fix this language barrier.

I decided to change the subject, “So… uh… why are you out here?”

She looked around us, her countenance noticeably hardening, “I irsed some weighty theeden. They killed me and mered my soul in this plash.”

I could only guess what the first sentence meant and figured I could ask about it again later. So I figured we should move on to a less sensitive topic, “Um… So… where are you from?”

The smile returned to her face, “I am from Urim of the Kengir theedship.”

Urim sounded familiar, but I couldn’t place how. These Kengir people on the other hand, I had no idea. As she had been here for quite a while already as a ghost, I imagined her people didn’t exist any more.

I noticed her waiting for my reply, and felt embarrassed again, “Oh… yeah. I’m from the United States of America and I guess I’m pretty much a hundred percent European.”

Her expression stayed the same so I couldn’t tell if she found any of that familiar, “Your theedship and theedlands must be far from my old ard or this fack has brought new theedships.” She reached her hands to my ears and looked at the tail I’d unconsciously held between my legs in an unintentional display of my nervousness, “You are of a theedship that is not kithey to me.”

I instinctively touched my ears, “Oh. A… um… theedship changed themselves to become more like cats…” I didn’t want to say assassin, “for… um… reasons.”

She nodded at the explanation, “That is so?”

I began walking again, “Umm… maybe we should get out of here? We’ve still got a ways to go and I guess I should give you a heads up on my situation since you’re stuck with me.”

She looked around, her eyes lingering on my mask curiously for a moment, before nodding, “That is a good suggestion.”

I was actually looking forward to this despite the irritating language barrier. I was an introvert through and through, but after days of endless wetlands, it would be nice to have some company and if she backstabbed me later, well, I should already be dead. If not, I had an awesome ghost friend.

Lots of exposition here. I think I'm happy with using flashbacks to Tamana's master is much better than just a simple dump while allowing me to flesh him out more since he didn't get much time before leaving The Soul Well. 

If anyone is interested, Mula is speaking Anglish. Anglish is a project where people are trying to create what English would sound like without all of the foreign loan words. In effect, Anglish is 'pure' while English is 'vulgar.' Check out the for more information including the full workbook. This will also probably be the only chapter I use it in because Tamana will just translate it and Mula will also learn the 'vulgar' way of speaking. It also takes a lot of extra time using it and I doubt it would be fun to read if I kept using it.

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