Chapter 47: 43. Good Ol’ Potluck Brawl

Jay was annoyed.

From one perspective, someone in Jay's shoes might've been particular about visitors breaking the sacred tenet of a potluck. Bringeth the offerings, then partake. But the potluck had crashers being straight-up moochers.

On another note, most people might've found the potluck crashers' unwarranted and aggressive looks toward YoAnna as reasons to kick them out, even if it meant kicking them physically. It was one thing to look at. Or stare, even. But they were crossing the line.

So, there were a couple of solid reasons for Jay to lay down the law if he was like most people.

But he was a Luckrun.

Regarding the food, the potluck also served as a gathering point for donations and non-profit work. Community-minded folks at his mom's gathering liked to network. Maybe a rich person or two were in the mix. Plenty of food and money went into this for people to come and eat for free.

And it was Team Divine's duty to be YoAnna's guard dogs against mundane creeps, not Jay's. He'd seen almost half the school crush on her lightly or aggressively. Jealousy slid off Jay like water off a duck's back on occasions like these.

Truly, Jay's annoyance must be from a more enlightened perspective.

"The mooks are introducing themselves too early," Jay muttered.

He knew he would look cool. The prospect of exploring his more lesser used Attributes was exciting, too. But he had a set story in his head. One where he was a 90's style, grunge and gritty, up-and-coming young hero forced into a confrontation in the bad part of town.

He also felt guilty he couldn't shake off that trope. YoAnna had dissected it and left it bleeding on the floor, but he still held tightly to the remaining pieces.

"Maybe I'll take the more peaceful route," Jay said with a sigh.

"What he saying?" asked one of the ten men standing in front of Jay.

"Sounds crazy," said another potluck crasher.

"What do you expect from the Rooftop Weirdo?" asked a familiar face. "I still got a bet you'll break your neck by eighteen, Rooftop."

"Dufflebag Doug, is that you?" Jay's 30 Intellect answered yes. "Oh, dude, I couldn't find you last week."

Jay looked from the snack smuggler to the other men.

Were these guys the reason Doug hadn't shown up at school?

Doug also looked different. He went from tall and skinny to hella jacked for a teen. He was still smaller than the others behind him, but the summer must've been transformative for Doug.

"No more school?" Jay asked.

"School's for losers," Doug said.

"Sometimes," Jay replied. "But some of my friends like it, so I tolerate it."

"Yo, Doug, get this little punk out the way, or I will," said another potluck crasher.

"I got this! Rooftop Weirdo is weak as hell!" Doug laughed.

"Friends of yours?" Jay ogled the group, unbothered by the insults. "Man, you guys must lift all day. Is there a street bodybuilder competition coming up?"

"That's what Rebel Angels gotta do to protect our turf," Doug said proudly. "You better watch yourself, Jay, or you'll be another feather."

Doug pulled up his shirt sleeve and revealed a tattooed feather on his shoulder. He had plenty of space for more. Jay surmised the feathers ranked gang members in their murderous hierarchy.

The whispering onlookers whispering started to speak up in fear and excitement.

"Someone should break in there before Jay gets hurt," said one man, who stayed in the back.

"Nope, nope, nope," said a woman making her escape. "Rebel Angels outside of Junkside means body bags on the streets. I'm gone."

"It's because of that Jhara," said one of the neighborhood hags. "This is her fault."

"I heard from a friend down the street who heard from her nail tech who heard from a mechanic," said another hag, "Jhara slept with a rival gang leader down there in Junkside. They're fighting for that devil woman, and her son's gonna pay the price!"

Jay frowned. Gangsters weren't his mom's type. She was more into the straight and narrow goodie two-shoes or the on-the-rise young guy from a traditional family. They were more fun for her to corrupt.

Some of the guests did try to intervene. They weren't effective.

The Rebel Angels pulled up their shirts and revealed they were all carrying pistols. Since this was Central Florida, other guests at the potluck had pistols, too. But who, other than the Rebel Angels, was willing to risk a deadly shootout with kids around?

Jay's frown deepened. This was a little more serious than he'd expected. His heart ached as his boyish dream of 90's style comic book action started to dissolve.

Doug sneered and stepped closer to Jay.

"I know that's YoAnna under the mask," Doug said smarmily. "There ain't no mistaking the Queen and all that sexiness." He sounded like a man in the desert, desperate for a drink. "Step aside, and I'll let my brothers know we're cool."

"Really?" Jay asked.

Doug patted Jay on the shoulder. "You were one of my best customers. I won't forget that. And if you want to be where the power's all at, holla at me. I'll let the boss know you hooked us up with the Queen, and that'll be your in."

"Uh-huh," Jay said. He gently took Doug's hand off his shoulder and stepped back.

Jay lost the mood to do this alone.

YoAnna wasn't even paying attention. She was busy slipping cookies under her mask to feed her all-consuming hunger.

And he shouldn't involve Lilith.

She would slaughter them horribly.

If he ignored the sweet, medicinal, and deadly scents wafting off of her as warnings, his [Eye of Venerated Madness] suggested the danger with straight facts.

 

Name: Lilith Hernandez, Rank 2 Class: [Apprentice Crafter, Level 15]  Health: 400/400 Stamina: 400/400 Mana: 800/800 Chance: x4/x6 Noteworthy Info: This human shares an allegiance with you under the same Godling and Pantheon. Her Affinity is Alchemy. Highest Attribute is 60 Intellect. Most Signature Item is Powdered Raticide Toxin, Great. Most Pivotal Skill is [Apocalyptic Chemistry]. Most Particular Talent is [Snake Boon]. Most Unique Title is [Princess of Extermination].

 

Would you look at that! It looked like a scrumptiously broken profile right there! She had the entire mystical doctrine of Alchemy as her Affinity!

It was almost questionable who was more op. The number one genius with magical chemistry? Or one dancey boi with gravity?

Then again, she wasn't a [Freak]. She didn't embody alchemy on every level of conceptuality–which would've been freaky if she did.

She was still human, which was probably a good thing.

With that all in mind, it would be a shame to disclude her based on the potential threat to all life. If she restricted herself to only her Attributes, it shouldn't be a problem for her to help.

"Ladies, wanna get in on this?" Jay asked, ignoring the Rebel Angels' burst of laughter. "I kinda lost the mood." He looked at YoAnna. "Guns, please?" Then he looked at Lilith. "Wanna fist fight with me? Could be more fun that way."

The Rebel Angels laughed even louder, a roaring waterfall of jeers and insults. The onlookers gawked at Jay like he was a crazy coward.

A subtle golden glimmer flickered through the peepholes in YoAnna's mask. Only Jay, and perhaps Lilith, would notice. "There. Disabled," YoAnna said as she slowly slipped a cookie under her colorful choker.

The [Faerie] menace snatched it and ate from the best hiding spot ever. YoAnna smacked the crumbs off her chest thoughtlessly and continued her gluttonous journey of sampling more dishes from the potluck.

"Fighting them with my bare knuckles is barbaric and inefficient," Lilith said before Doug made gross comments about her height. The First Nerd narrowed her eyes. "But the psychological and emotional damage I'll inflict will be entertaining."

"Would you like me to save Doug for you?" Jay asked. "I appreciate the guy for having snacks when I needed them, but this is uncalled for."

"You may leave Doug and three others to me," Lilith said. "You're a capable male. We should acknowledge some societal norms where you do most of the heavy lifting."

Jay bowed dutifully with an elegant wave.

Ever so slightly, Lilith smiled. Only a few people could get her to brighten her mood. Mike and Jay were the main ones. Which helped them bond over the years regardless of her competition with Mike or the lack of intellectual similarities with Jay.

Thus, this stopped being a boyish power fantasy for Jay. It became more of a quirky and lighthearted power fantasy with another one of his childhood friends.

"Man, I'm tired of this shit!" yelled the biggest and most muscular gangster. "Queen, this. Rooftop Weirdo, that. And nobody gives a fuck about First Nerd. Murk the punk and slap these bitches until they learn respect!"

As the biggest gangster shouted, stirring the scared but thrilled onlookers further, Lilith walked up with perfect little steps and a highly straight posture. 

The gangsters saw her. The crowd saw her. Her dad saw her especially and tried to break in, but Jay's mom tackled him down before he could intervene.

Nobody else did a thing to stop Lilith.

Jay figured people wouldn't expect much from her since she was small, very childish looking, and was dressed in a white Sunday gown with flowery patterns matched by shiny white church shoes.

The gangsters looked at her like she was crazy. But they were also stunned by the audacity. A dash of morbid curiosity and whatever x4 Chance did probably allowed Lilith to step up to the biggest and scariest looking gangster uncontested.

And punch him in the dick.

Jay's mad laughter intertwined with the big gangster's high-pitched shriek as he crumpled to the ground. Lilith smartly removed herself from amid the gangsters with a quick and militant dash. When one of the gangsters tried to cut her off, Lilith's Agility proved high enough to step aside and avoid him.

Jay punched a gangster's jaw and broke it as he pondered on Lilith's Strength and Agility spread. Since she had 400 Stamina, and the [Crafter] Class gained +1 Agility, +1 Discovery, and +6 Free AP with every level up, Jay had an inkling that her AP in Agility was higher than her Strength.

She moved like she had mid-twenties Agility. When she attacked another man, it wasn't for a one-punch blow like what Jay was doing. Instead, her mechanically correct and stiff punches did heavy enough damage to break a few ribs.

She dodged around as if she knew she couldn't risk wrestling four or more of them at once. So Jay guesstimated her Strength was in the mid-teens. So she was probably a 15 Strength/25 Agility type of gal right now. That was more than enough here.

But Lilith didn't have moves like Jay. She also didn't have [Monkey Boon]. It was kind of unfair of Jay to limit her to physical fighting. Because she couldn't recover as quickly as Jay when she made close-quarters mistakes.

One such mistake had a gangster hit her flush on the cheek with his pistol–the gangsters had to wield their dysfunctional weapons for melee rather than their original purposes.

But Lilith had Health to spare like Jay.

Lilith's Health Status: 397/400

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If a girl similar to Lilith's build had taken that pistol whip, she would've gotten her face broken into pieces and been sent to the ER. For Lilith, a -3 damage left a tiny mark on her cheek. She then returned the favor with two straight body punches to the guy who had decked her face with his gun. She crumpled the gangster.

Out of pure curiosity, Jay stopped dodging and dancing around and took a pistol whip to the same spot Lilith had been struck. He noticed a blinking notification in the back of his head that he'd typically ignore and pulled it up.

You've suffered -10 physical damage.

"Whoa, Lilith, you're tougher than me!" Jay said, flipping over a desperate tackle from a gangster.

She probably had more Resilience. She could also have a Skill that made her tougher, too. That was a significant damage reduction on her.

"I've been meaning to ask why I can feel you looking inside me, Jay. Is that because of your new eye?" Lilith asked while on the perimeter of the brawl. She learned to dart in and pull herself out when the gangsters tried to wrestle.

"Yeah, I can see some details," Jay said casually. "Sorry for peeping. It's hard not to when it's easy to do."

"Do not be sorry," Lilith said with monotonous amusement. "Show me your sincerity by letting me experiment on you."

"Oh, goodie!" Jay said with faux cheer. "I've always wanted to be a test monkey!"

The fight slowed as the Champions landed hits that folded the gangsters. The gangsters lacked Stamina in comparison, too. Jay occupied a weary and short-of-breath Doug and three others while Lilith watched like a hawk.

Jay tested himself to move at the last possible millisecond from a hit. While dancing. He got caught several times and congratulated the gangsters each time they struck a little glancing blow. Then Jay knocked out another gangster.

Four became three.

Then three became two.

"Fuck this!" Doug cried, making a break for it.

A smiling Lilith cut him off. "You mentioned my mouth and height are perfect for you. Explain in further detail, please."

While Lilith took her time with Doug, Jay waited with a goofy grin across from the last gangster standing.

"Wanna call it a truce and get your boys outta here?" Jay asked.

"Yeah, man, I'm down with that," the gangster admitted.

You've dominated an encounter with systemless thugs!

Nice. That should give them experience since the System was still active in recognizing significant events. Jay found it remarkable that the System could be flexible with rewards depending on the context. It might not offer much experience, but something was better than nothing.

After Lilith had her fun pimp slapping Doug for half a minute, Jay ensured the gangsters picked themselves up and left the potluck without being accosted further. When he returned to the backyard, the tone was different. Mostly everyone was surrounding and cheering Lilith.

When they saw Jay alone, they bum-rushed him like he was their idol. It was almost a little too much. His mom intervened, waving a machete that scared back some of the more Caribbean and Latin American cultured folks. Jay used that as his cue to get a breather inside the house.

YoAnna was waiting for him in the kitchen. She gently handed Kleo over, the [Faerie] rubbing her swollen belly while groaning from food-baby pain.

The [Freak] knew what this meant with YoAnna.

"Can't you stay a little longer?" Jay asked.

YoAnna removed her mask and gave Jay an apologetic smile. The scar seemed to give her a more humble and understanding look now.

"Did you have fun?" Jay asked, switching tracks to keep the mood light.

"I'd never thought I'd see you and Lilith brawl gangsters together," YoAnna said. "I stopped eating to watch. It was quite beautiful. And you have a knack for people I envy, Jay."

"What?" Jay blinked. "How do you go from Lilith and I tag-teaming on gangsters being beautiful to me being a people person?"

"It's not any one thing, Jay. It's a culmination of your actions that others appreciate and I adore."

Jay's chest bloomed with warm and fuzzy feelings.

"I leave you for these two weeks assured that I will absorb the cores competently and without further taint remaining," YoAnna said. "And have improvements for us, hopefully."

"I'll work with the others and beat back the intensified feelings they'll get. Happy ending route for all, right?"

"Indeed, happy endings." YoAnna's face lit up with joy.

It was almost too much for Jay.

But the blissful sunshine couldn't last forever. Jay heralded the night before YoAnna did, knowing it was something that concerned them both.

"The System Admins," Jay said, "are on my mind. Not all of my mind. But they take up some real estate."

"One dungeon incursion at a time, Jay," YoAnna said. "Make use of the moments between."

She pulled him into an embrace. Her gentle hands were against the back of his head, stroking through his hair. His face was on her chest. Inside her was a godly beat similar to a heart but with a power that shook Jay to his core. It provided a comfort like nothing Jay had ever felt.

The moment was blissful. It stayed like that for a long while, even after YoAnna removed the alcohol intoxication as promised.

And disappeared.

"Hey, man," his mom greeted, finding Jay sitting at the kitchen table. Kleo was napping on his lap as he petted her gently.

"Hey, Mom," Jay responded.

"Potluck's over. You're gonna be the talk of the entire neighborhood."

"Cool," Jay said, coming down from his happy high. Reality set in. "Actually, not cool. That's way too public."

"Yeah, that Agent Cabana spooky girl wasn't happy. She's roping me, Luis, and other Champion parents into a top-secret meeting tomorrow." His mom sighed dramatically. "So much good material that I can't use for my writing!"

"You'll figure something out, Mom," Jay said before feeling down. "I'm sorry we brought trouble. I'm not sure if that was natural. Sometimes the System has this way of pushing things to happen."

"The Chance stat, right?" Jhara asked carefully.

"Yeah," Jay said. "Honestly, Lilith would be good to talk to about this. Where is she?"

"That handsome helicopter swooped in and took her away." She sighed. "And I got a call from my editor."

Jay winced. "Is it bad?"

"Yeah. She's not happy with me. I keep making the same mistakes." She groaned. "The schedule is tight, too. So I have to do these edits and get today's writing done and…."

"I'll show you more of my powers later, okay?" Jay got to his feet. "I promise, mom."

"Fine," she said sadly.

She hugged him. "You are my anime protagonist of a son. This is so awesome. I love it. But most importantly, I love you, man."

Jay used one arm to return the embrace while holding Kleo. "And you're the most awesome mom ever. And I love you, too."

This wasn't as heavenly as getting hugged by his divine crush, but Jay enjoyed it nonetheless. His mom had done a lot for him. So, these embraces were for her and him. Then they split apart to take care of their separate things since the Luckruns were big believers in individual pursuits, especially of the creative kind.

One short trip to his room was all Jay needed to prepare for the junkyard. A change of clothes. Snacks, bottles of water, bottles of something fun, and a notebook with some pens in case he wanted to jot things down. All in one backpack. He also remembered the bag of holding this time.

Then Jay stepped out into the Sunday afternoon.

Kleo was hidden in the shade of his hood, using the nook of his neck as a seat.

"Just us again, Kleo," Jay said.

"I don't mind," she replied. "Did you have fun?"

"Yeah," he said, thinking of YoAnna with a smile. "I did."

He wiped the bliss off his face and wore a more serious expression. He did not need to say anything for his familiar to know what bothered him.

"They twisted the arm of your divine Patron. They forced two childhood friends to hurt each other. And scar each other. All to have us weakened or destroyed. The System Admins must not go unpunished," Kleo said darkly.

Jay clenched his jaw, letting a horrid, chest-piercing, near agonizing anger, consume him. His mind catapulted to the image of YoAnna's bloodied and pained face after he had commanded Kleo to fulfill the promise. To mark YoAnna for the rest of her days, ruining her before she could be the absolute zenith of goddess perfection forever.

Then that anger went up a notch when he looked deeper. If YoAnna had won, if Jay had failed, his feelings for her would've been neutered. His friendship would've been akin to emotional slavery.

He wouldn't be himself if that were to pass.

And YoAnna would've hurtled down a darker path if she hadn't failed if Jay hadn't won and had Kleo teach her a lesson. That would have destroyed what remained of the Multiverse Protectorate Pantheon like snuffing a baby in the crib.

Then their universe would face the full brunt of a careless system apocalypse.

"Breathe, Master Jay, breathe," Kleo said.

Jay did just that.

One big breath in. One big breath out.

He repeated the cycle until he found his anger simmering down.

But it made him dizzy. All that anger had exploded from the dark recesses of his mind. A place he tried to avoid and keep separate so that he could cultivate the good of life. To live for fun and festivity and enjoy the lighthearted nature of being a comedic person. To climb to rooftops. To dance and laugh.

Using his breath to meditate on the spot helped him return to his haven, his usual emotional state. It wasn't a piece of nirvana, but it was something he cherished and found wonderful. From there, he could let the feelings ebb and flow, getting close to a positive balance.

"We must practice," Jay said calmly. "We must learn to be great at what we do. To push our OP powers to further OP heights."

"OP training montage?" Kleo asked jovially, doing her best to appease her master. She was a good familiar.

"That depends on how we learn and progress," Jay said. 

It would've been nice if Mike or Lilith could help, but Jay trusted his 30 Intellect would do decently. In response, his strangely aware 30 Intellect gave Jay a mental thumbs up.

Jay continued, "Today's more of an exploration day."

"Aw."

Jay chuckled softly. "We'll have a training montage sooner or later, I bet."

"Yay!"

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