Chapter 5: ss - 1.1

Side Story 1.1. My Fiancé 

This is the story of the time between when Stanley became my fiancé and when he left the mansion.

***

The scent of jasmine softly wafted from the open window.

In that room full of spring, there was my parents and I, Stanley and his parents, a few butlers, Dana, and a few maids a short distance away.

Stanley’s name, written in his slightly meticulous handwriting, lined up under his father’s signature.

The engagement was now complete.

He became my fiancé more easily than I had expected. I stared at his calm profile.

I thought there would be more of a change of heart once we were engaged. I thought there would be more of a change of heart once we were engaged, that love would rise up from the depths of my body, that I would not want to leave him. But it seems that humans can’t change that quickly.

When he looked up at me, I narrowed my eyes and smiled.

“I look forward to working with you from now on, my fiancé.”

Stanley also smiled with his usual cool face.

“Yes, it would be my pleasure.”

***

There was no sudden change in this relationship.

But I thought that we would slowly become engaged to each other. I thought we were going to have an unknown relationship, a man and a woman who would soon become husband and wife.

And yet.

“Isn’t it far?”

As usual, Stanley came to meet me at the greenhouse during break time, but we were standing too far away from each other to reach.

He just shook his head at my disgruntled words.

“Hey, Stanley. We’re engaged.”

“Yes, we are. That’s why I think we should keep an appropriate distance until we get married.”

I stood up with a swoosh. I slowly closed the distance between us, but he quickly took two steps backwards.

“I’d like to get closer to…”

“I can’t.”

“Just so long as my father doesn’t find out.”

“No, My Lady.”

“…You were trying to kiss me the other day.”

“I tried.”

At first he was upset when I teased him like this, but now he had this clear face.

“Boring…”

“Boring is fine.”

I sat down in my chair and plopped down on the table with my back to him.

I wondered if Stanley was not happy. This was the only time in my life that I would be engaged. Didn’t he want to enjoy this situation with me?

With my cheek on the table, I reached for a cookie on his plate. As I nibbled on a few, ignoring the admonitionment, “You’re not behaving,” I heard Stanley sigh softly, as if he didn’t want me to hear.

“My Lady.”

I ignored that voice as well.

“…I’d better get back. Would you like to cool off here after dinner again today? I’ll see you then.”

“You don’t have to come if you can’t even talk to me face to face anyway.”

Before I could say the swear words that slipped over my lips, I was already strongly regretting that mindless remark.

‘…I lied, I’m sorry. I’m waiting for you, come and see me.”

I said in a muffled voice and shrugged my upper body propped up on my desk in shame.

I peeked through the cracks in my hair to see if he had gone in disgust when he didn’t answer for any length of time. Stanley was standing right in front of me, touching the table with his ungloved hand, then quickly moving away.

“I’ll be here around seven o’clock. Excuse me.”

The sound of shoes moved away, and I heard the door to enter the mansion from the greenhouse close.

“Ugh…”

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I moaned and pressed my face against the table once more.

I felt lonely. I was going to be crushed by that feeling.

I didn’t want to go back to the days when we were innocent and unaware, but I did want to talk to him face to face and just gaze into his kind eyes.

Most of the feelings that dominated my body right now were loneliness.

And the rest…

It was not love for him, it was a struggle.

How dare you make me feel so lonely?

I’m going to fight this fight to the bitter end.

I grabbed three of the remaining cookies and threw them in my mouth at once. If Dana saw me, she’d probably give me a 30-minute lecture, but I’m not afraid of that now.

Yes, I’m not going to let something like this get me down.

I wanted to see that face again. I wanted to see that face again, the one with the sadly narrowed eyes, the feverish gaze, the one with the true emotions seeping out.

I want you to look at me again.

***

The next day, I immediately took action. It was afternoon. I targeted the time when Dana was out.

I knew Stanley’s work for the day and waited for him in the corridor where he left my father’s office to go to his room. I was wrong and had to wait for about thirty minutes before I finally saw the person I wanted coming down the hall.

I ducked around a corner and peeked out quietly. It was only Stanley, and there was no one else in sight, nor did he seem to notice me.

When I heard the sound of his shoes, I lowered my posture and took a stance. At that moment…

My eyes met him as he came around the corner. I pounced on his stomach a split second before his face was stained with surprise.

“Stanley!”

“Whoa!”

He would have recognized me, but he let out a scream like I’d never heard before and dropped the bundle of papers in his hand with a bang as if he was throwing them.

When I looked up at his face with my hands behind my back, his face was stained with dismay and his lips quivered.

“My Lady, oh, what the hell are you doing…!”

“You haven’t been by my side lately, and I’ve been missing you.”

Before he could finish, I grabbed him by the shoulders and said, “I’ve been missing you lately.”

Before I could finish, I was grabbed by the shoulder and yanked away with great force. I put my hand on his hand and gently rubbed his cheek.

“You haven’t touched me in a long time.”

Stanley’s whole body froze as he opened his mouth to say something. He looked up at my face and lifted his lips in an arc.

Well, that’s enough for today. I picked up the fallen bundle of papers to replace his frozen one and looked into his face.

“How long are you going to stay frozen?”

I held out the stack of papers and Stanley finally let out a shaky breath, looked down at me and took it.

“I’m going to tell… Dana.”

“If you do that, I won’t see you until we’re married. I’ll… miss you.”

Looking up at him with my eyebrows deliberately drooping, Stanley kept his mouth shut. He tried to say something, ended up not being able to say anything, put his hand on his forehead, and then looked up.

“…So, what can I do for you?”

No, I was just waiting for you to surprise me.”

I quickly turned on my heel before he could get mad at me.

“Well then, good luck with your work, Stanley.”

“My Lady!”

He yelled at my back.

“I’ll be sure to tell Dana next time!”

“I’m glad you’re expecting me next time!”

Waving widely, I basked in the afterglow of my complete victory.

I did the same thing three more times, twice successfully, but the third time he was so frustrated that he avoided me.

I had learned my lesson, and today I followed him from behind. He had said he was going to tell Dana off, but I guess he hadn’t because I hadn’t been lectured yet.

I followed him back, hiding behind the furniture on the walls and in the hallway.

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