Chapter 62: 61

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Kai couldn't help but wonder if Philip was going to touch his hand again, like he did while the got out of the diner. He had forgotten how it felt for your heart to flutter with the slightest touches, with small gestures that to others seemed completely normal. He had buried deep into his heart moments like those because no one really could make him feel like Philip did. It was pointless to search for those romantic thrills in between faceless people when you knew the form of love for you. Sadly for him they entered the forest without him making any gesture to drag him along. A thought passed by Kai's cunning mind that he should probably play hard to get and stay back, forcing Philip to touch him but then he decided not to. He would simply seem even more spoiled like that. 

The forest was beautiful, tall pine trees everywhere, almost covering the bright winter sky. He could feel the softness of the earth underneath his feet and hear animals and birds all around him. Rustling in the fussy bushes and the sound of a creek somewhere far away. Philip walked through the narrow paths with confidence, staring at everything with a nostalgic expression. 

"This palace was to be my pack's. We lived here until Mikain became the alpha and decided we should relocate to the city. Then he started to make us travel to hunt down vampires and make money." He explained. 

"I do not like your Alpha." Kai said. Philip smiled.

"Believe me I don't think anyone does. It's his fault I lost my parents, Hans lost his wife. In this endless fight, a war that we started we have lost so many of our members. Only the bloodthirsty ones seem to thrive." 

"Then why don't you try to overthrow him?" Kai asked. 

"Who would dare? He is really strong. Even us, the wolf warriors, are nothing in front of him." he told the vampire and headed deeper into the forest. While they walked Philip noticed a huge rock, he sat down, Kai sitting on the other side, their backs touching while they talked. 

"If you went to his room, what would have happened?" Kai asked. He felt Philip tense. He couldn't see his expression but the moment he finished his questions he felt the muscles on his back tense. He regretted asking but still the werewolf offered him an answer, maybe even something he didn't wish to hear. 

"He does terrible things. I believe he wants to be in control, in every aspect of his life. Sometimes though this frenzy becomes a sickness. So many young girls and boys have come out bloody, with bruises and crying. He is a monster, he reminds me every day that we are cursed, no matter how hard I try to forget it."

"Philip, why would you accept to go there?" 

"Because I don't take rejection well, obviously. Also, sometimes I tend to be reckless, as if I want to take revenge on myself. Even if I didn't do anything else. But, let me ask you something, Kai, the third prince of the Avger monarchy…" the wolf said and Kai was one hundred percent sure he was smirking. "Why did you want me to kill you?" he asked, his tone serious. Kai's eyes widened. He did not expect that kind of a question. 

"I tend to punish myself too sometimes. I deserve it though."

"Is that the reason the bloody people are after you? Because of what you did?"

"No." Kai mumbled. 

"Then what…"

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"I can't talk about it, Philip, so please don't ask me things I can't answer you." Kai said and stood up. He didn't like talking to the trees anymore. He walked around the huge rock and stood in front of the werewolf. "My turn now." he told him with a cheeky smile, his hands entwined behind his back as he spoke. 

"Ask ahead."

"Why are you so obsessed with me?" he asked him, joking but Philip turned silent, staring at him into the eyes. Kai felt uncomfortable, he had forgotten for a while the situation he was in, he had let go again, just because he was with Philip. That was why he shouldn't be with him. 

"When I first met you…" Philip started saying, surprising him again. "I could immediately tell that you were wearing some kind of mask. That alone was like a puzzle. You definitely are spoiled even if you try so hard to hide it…" he said with a chuckle while Kai rolled his eyes. "...but you are not cold. You looked like that at first but that's not it. You're actually very expressive, you like to swear and you're very hotheaded."

"Wow you've mapped my entire existence." Kai told him and clapped for him. 

"Am I wrong?" Philip asked him, cocking an eyebrow. 

"No you shithead you're not. But you getting to see through me, does not mean you will want to come closer." Kai said. It was just the two of them now, a last day, a last time. Maybe he should simply allow himself, just for this time to let go. 

"You're beautiful Kai. All the contradictions. From your appearance to your attitude you're the most beautiful enigma I've ever seen but I am afraid to solve you."

"And why is that?" Kai asked him. His heart was racing. Thumping so loud in his ribcage. He had called him beautiful, Kai thought like a teenage girl.

"Because I am scared that behind all this...I will just find a hurt prince, crying." he told him honestly and Kai froze. He averted his gaze, not wanting to betray himself and coughed. 

"You're thinking too much about it." Kai finally said, not knowing how to end the conversation. "There is no prince, there are no tears. It's simply nothingness." he told him and watched him get up. He took a few steps closer, wanting to approach him but Kai stepped back, further and further until his back was against a rough tree trunk. Philip placed his hand right next to his head, hovering as he whispered. 

"Why do I think that I am perfectly right?" he asked, close to his ear as Kai felt his breathing land on his sensitive neck. Kai gulped, feeling his body shiver by the sound of his voice. 

He didn't know what to do. He felt trapped but he liked it. Stuck there, close to him, hearing him breathe, smelling his scent, hearing his voice. After two hundred years finally he was right here and Kai felt like it was his first time falling in love. Overwhelmed by everything he pushed Philip back, their eyes meeting for a mere second before the vampire…

Ran away. 

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